The Island of Misfit Blog Posts

The place to find stuff that doesn’t really fit any particular category.

Points of Ponderation…..Episode 8.15

A semi-regular attempt to address some of life’s minutiae that might otherwise be overlooked…..

 

 

 

 

Perhaps I spoke too soon about Donald Trump. The Donald has now taken to bashing former President George W. Bush about W9/11 and bragging that, had President Trump been in charge on that awful day 14 years ago, it wouldn’t have happened. Sorry dude…you’ve stepped over the line this time. Was W. a perfect President?? Of course not. But I’ve got some news for y’all: none of them have been perfect. Not even Washington, Lincoln, FDR, JFK, or Reagan. I have long opined that history will judge George W. Bush much more fairly than he has been evaluated in the short term by the horrendous drive-by media and the idiotic Hollywood elite. Trump is completely misinterpreting a mistrust of Jeb Bush and the underlying desire to step away from a been-there-done-that Bush Dynasty. Many Republicans like & respect George W. Bush despite his flaws and attacking him is not a strategery that Trump should embrace.

 

 

head-scratch2It isn’t unusual for me to feel lonely in a crowded room. What is sad is that one of the places that I feel that way most often is…well no…I’m not going there. Forgive them Lord…they know not what they do.

 

 

McDonald’s you are nothing but a bunch of liars!! They spent all this time hyping “All Day Breakfast” but failed to mcmmention that the menu is limited. I stopped by my friendly neighborhood drive thru recently during the early evening hours. I was craving a simple Egg McMuffin. Well too bad for me!! Hey McD’s…do you realize that the Egg McMuffin is your signature breakfast item?? Why in the H#^% is it not part of the All Day Breakfast?!?!?!?? That’s insane!! The McGriddle…an admittedly unhealthy yet undeniably tasty option…is not available either. Essentially they are pushing their biscuit based items. I assume this is partly due to the fact that during normal breakfast hours most people with any sense are heading to Hardees or Tudor’s for biscuits. Bob Evans if they have time for a sit down meal. So now McDonald’s is trying to trick people into buying something we usually have no interest in simply because it is available past 10:30am. Sorry folks…I don’t care. I’ll just make time to get my Egg McMuffin earlier in the day. Thanks for playing.

 

 

With the release of the final trailer for Star Wars VII: The Force Awakens I expect that anticipation will crescendo over the next forceseveral weeks. Advanced ticket sales are already crashing websites. Some theaters will be showing a marathon of the entire series leading up to the release of the new film in mid-December. I might have been all over that idea two decades ago, but now spending 15 straight hours in a movie theater sounds like some sort of innovative sentence for a very serious misdemeanor. It is likely that I will take time to rewatch the original trilogy and the prequel trilogy in the days leading up to The Force Awakens launch, but I’ll do it in the comfort of my own home with a little help from Roku. Having said all that, the trailer looks good and does evoke certain emotions that take one back to childhood, when such trivial things as movies seemed so significant. I’m not sure I’ll be standing in line for the first midnight showing, but I’ll definitely hit the theater within a day or two of the film’s opening. I’m not going to analyze every frame of the trailer or parse every morsel of information out there about the production. I am not going to assume the movie will be terrible, but neither will I build it up in my mind to be the greatest thing EVER only to be disappointed. I’m just going to head to the local cineplex at some point when it is convenient, purchase a vat of cola & some popcorn, and enjoy a pleasant & entertaining experience. After all, isn’t that what movies are for??

 

 

I recently ate cooked spinach for the first time in…well, probably decades. And you know what?? I actually enjoyed it. I’ve heard spinachthat one’s palate changes every 7 years. I’m not sure that’s completely true, but maybe we all should be a bit more open to trying things that we didn’t used to like. One never knows how maturity & perspective may alter perception.

 

 

Rumor has it that a new Die Hard film is in the works. That, in & of itself, is fine by me even if mcclanethe last couple of sequels have been tepid & unworthy efforts. However, word on the street is that the latest installment will be a prequel, with just a cameo by Bruce Willis. That’s a terrible idea on so many levels. Willis’ Detective John McClane IS Die Hard. I can’t imagine how difficult it might be to find an actor up to the task of playing a young McClane. No one should have to endure the pressure of stepping into those shoes. The final Die Hard needs to be McClane’s retirement party…a perfect excuse to bring back all the supporting players from the previous films: Sgt. Al Powell, Capt. Lorenzo, Zeus Carver, Matt Ferrell, Argyle the limo driver, Det. Walter Cobb, and of course McClane’s wife Holly & his two grown children Lucy & Jack. Someone that McClane has ticked off in the past manages to hold his family & friends hostage and McClane has to save the day…again. That’s how Die Hard should end. A prequel will not work.

Points of Ponderation…..Episode 7.15

A semi-regular attempt to address some of life’s minutiae that might otherwise be overlooked…..

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schumerI like to laugh and believe I have a keen sense of humor, but I really don’t get the whole Amy Schumer thing. Is she really a whore or does she just play one on TV?? Either way I just don’t find her shtick all that funny. Maybe mildly amusing in the right mood…but certainly not hilarious to the point that she should be a huge star. Of course we’re talking about a culture that has made people like The Kardashians and all those Real Housewives famous, so I suppose nothing should take me by surprise at this point.

 

 

Dang it…Donald Trump is slowly wearing me down. Part of me would like to see him elected President just to watch a bunch of trumppeople freak out. Some have already said they’d leave the country if he wins, and I think it’d be hilarious to call their bluff. Plus I sincerely do believe that we need a significant course correction in America, a total shakeup from politics as usual.

 

 

roccoI mostly feed my 7 year old pug Rocco regular old dog food (which he loves), but he also likes bananas, baby carrots, cantaloupe, apples, & broccoli.

 

 

Speaking of politics, here’s another one of my million dollar ideas…..
What if we scrapped the current voting system, specifically for President?? No more primaries or caucuses. No conventions. Whoever wants to run would still have to declare by a certain date, and after that we could still have debates, stump speeches, & all the regular butt kissing hoopla. However, at a certain point before election day voting would begin…American Idol style. Once a week, month, or whatever kind of time interval is decided upon the phones would open up and/or the website would be active for a finite time…hours, days, whatever it may be. After that the lowest vote getter is out. Eliminated. Off the island. Better luck next time. They don’t get to decide when to drop out of the race…we make that decision for them. This process would continue until only two candidates are left standing. One last debate. Closing statements. Final vote. Bada bing bada boom…we have a new President. No voting booths. No polling places. The rules would obviously have to be hammered out, but we have the technology BallotPicture_AKto do what needs to be done. Voting age?? Keep it at 18, or if you want to be adventurous let the teenagers vote. Set other parameters if you wish. Votes can be limited however we want. We can keep it one person one vote, or we can allow a certain amount of votes to come from a particular phone number or IP address. Perhaps everyone eligible to vote is issued an ID number that would need to be entered into the system. Whatever kind of details decided upon should be fairly easy to track so cheating can be minimized. There are two big advantages to this system. First of all, since there would be multiple votes & eliminations it is likely that people would remain engaged in the process rather than not paying attention for months & months. Secondly, I suspect voter participation would multiply exponentially. I mean really…no matter how lazy a person may be it is not that hard to pick up the phone or log onto a website to cast a vote. How does the Electoral College factor in?? Well, we can keep it as it is for the final vote. Or we can adjust the number of votes allowed from each household/phone/IP address/ID number. For example, folks in California, New York, Florida, & Texas could be allowed to cast less votes per household (or whatever criteria it may be) than a person in Rhode Island because those bigger states have more people. The possibilities are endless, but we can certainly achieve the same kind of “level playing field” effect that the Electoral College provides. The details can be discussed and even massaged over time, but the main idea is that we streamline the procedure using technology, allowing voters to cast their ballots from the comfort of home, work, or wherever they are, and also keep more people interested in the process with regularly scheduled elimination votes. What do y’all think??

 

 

Perhaps one of the biggest mistakes we’ve made in America over the past few decades is minimizing shame. When I do something wrong (it happens believe it or not) I usually know it…sometimes before I do it…and I am embarrassed & ashamed. I hope no one noticed or no one finds out about the stupid thing I did. Christians might call that the conviction of The Holy Spirit, and while I agree completely with that concept I also think that all human beings, regardless of their spiritual philosophy, have varying levels of instinctual awareness of right & wrong. Those instincts have been largely muted in our modern culture. Choices that once upon a time were dishonorable are now celebrated. People are encouraged not to be ashamed of their poor choices. shameThey are taught to fight for rights and have pride in their sin. Anything goes. It’s all good as long as no one gets hurt. If it feels good do it. Lots of people call this “progress”, but maybe…just maybe…we were a better nation when more folks felt embarrassed about their bad decisions rather than being proud of them. Being told you’re wrong and having others reject your “wrongness” might not be very pleasant, but it certainly instills a strength of character that will never be achieved by mass enabling. There are those that like to pit the ideas of love and judgment against each other. However, I think it quite possible that one of the most loving things one can ever do for another is tell them that they are wrong, that they are heading down a dark path that leads to bad places. Love isn’t “I’m okay, you’re okay, we’re all okay, and everything is perfect”. Love is honesty and sometimes truth can be harsh. We’ve lost our nerve, all of us too scared to clearly define right vs. wrong. Or maybe we’ve gone so far into the abyss that our ability to distinguish the two is being numbed into oblivion. Forgiveness & redemption are two cornerstones of Christianity, but what good are they if no one thinks they are doing anything wrong??

 

 

Isn’t it sad that Russian President Vladimir Putin seems like he’s a better, smarter leader than the President of the United reaganStates?? Ronald Reagan would…as the kids used to say…have a cow!!

 

 

remoteThose apps & systems that allow one to control certain household features from afar make me very very nervous. If you can control your door locks with a cell phone and check in on your little doggy on a video cam while at work it doesn’t seem all that far-fetched that others could easily gain access as well. For God’s sake…there are people that hack the CIA and computer systems of billion dollar corporations. I assume that a remote monitoring system wouldn’t pose a huge challenge. No thanks.

 

 

This is my 400th post here at The Manofesto. When I do the math that doesn’t seem like a lot over the course of 6 ½ years. It is 400roughly 5 ditties per month. I am not nearly as productive as I could be, and that’s on me. I have spurts of creativity but also long periods of malaise. I’m not going to make any grandiose claims about doing better in the future. I’ve done that before and it was an empty promise. I am who I am and I’m mostly comfortable with that. I still enjoy doing this blogging thing. It is therapeutic for me, and I think we all need a healthy outlet of expression. I would love to see The Manoverse grow, and I’d like it to be more interactive, but I’m not going to force the issue. Please know that I deeply appreciate anyone who has ever stopped by and read even one thing that I have written. Thanks to all that have made comments over the years, even if you don’t exactly agree with my opinions. I’m not going anywhere and have plenty of ideas percolating, but I just wanted to take a moment to mark this milestone and say thank you.

Points of Ponderation…..Episode 6.15

A semi-regular attempt to address some of life’s minutiae that might otherwise be overlooked…..

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PopeI’m not Catholic, so I don’t get the whole Pope thing. He’s just a guy. Okay okay…he’s a preacher. I like preachers. I respect preachers. I believe that they are called into ministry and serve an important function in God’s Kingdom. However, it seems silly to me to weep in the dude’s presence or to think that touching his robe will somehow bring about a miracle. The Pope isn’t necessary for a miracle. Jesus is present anywhere & everywhere His presence is welcomed and He can make miracles happen. I won’t get into my personal opinions about the current Pope in particular, but I will say that I find the hero worship…especially by politicians & “journalists” who routinely advocate killing innocent babies, propagate racial & economic rancor, promote deviant & sinful lifestyles, and consistently ridicule The Bible & its teachings…to be more than a little bit disingenuous.

 

 

I think I would like autumn a lot more if it were followed by spring. Pumpkins, falling leaves, bonfires, flannel, hot soup, ghost fallstories, candy corn, hayrides, & apple cider are all undeniably quaint & enchanting, but the fact that they are a gateway to long, cold, snowy winter is depressing and sort of kills the mood.

 

 

Facepalm computerYou know that thing on Facebook where you “like” or “comment” on someone’s crazy status and then they message you basically saying it was a trick and now you have to post some kind of crazy status or do something wacky?? Yeah…I don’t play those kind of games because…well, I’m an adult. Your mileage may vary and that’s okay.

 

 

The resignation of John Boehner is a step in the right direction for Congress, but it’s a bit bonerlate in the game. He should have never been re-elected Speaker of the House after the last election. And I am justifiably concerned that another RINO will be chosen as his successor, which will just bring us back to the same predicament we’ve been in all along.

 

 

Oh…speaking of Facebook…..
For the love of God people…PLEASE stop posting statuses saying that “Channel 13 News” has said that we’re all going to be charged $5.99 to keep our stuff private but one can avoid the charge by copying & pasting a big paragraph full of legal mumbo jumbo. First of all, this hoax has been perpetrated a few times before. I can’t believe that people facebook-147are still dumb enough to fall for it. Secondly, Facebook’s business model has always been to make all their money from advertisers and the last time I checked Mark Zuckerberg was a billionaire so it must be working. And lastly, if/when this business model changes I am confident that we’d all be told about it well in advance thru proper channels, and one would either pay the money or leave Facebook. Do you honestly believe that simply posting a status would give you a free pass on any kind of user fee?? That’s idiotic. It’d be like going to McDonald’s and being given the choice to either pay for your meal or dance a jig on the roof of the restaurant. When you copy & paste this faux status you look like an uneducated, illiterate, ill-informed fool with absolutely zero common sense. Everyone is laughing at you. Just stop it.

 

 

I’m not scientifically inclined enough to fully understand the potential significance of water being present on Mars, but it sounds marsrather cool. Once upon a time in America we were excited about space exploration…eager to find out “what’s out there”. We walked on the moon. We sent shuttles up frequently. And then over time the populace started to get bored. People began to whine & complain about all the money being spent on the space program, in part because they were afraid of losing their free ride from the government, and also because the powers-that-be did a poor job of focusing on objectives & defining the mission to the public. Just a few decades ago this latest news from Mars would have been the lead story and cause for much buzz & excitement. America’s love for sci-fi…franchises like Star Trek & Star Wars, writers like Ray Bradbury & Robert Heinlein…was built on the foundation of a fascination with space and its mysteries. It is probably true that our nation has collectively gotten lazier & less curious, more interested in The Bachelor than The Enterprise. However, let’s not sell ourselves short. We should continue going boldly where no one has gone before & exploring strange new worlds. America needs to lead the charge…not be mildly interested spectators.

Points of Ponderation…..Episode 5.15

A semi-regular attempt to address some of life’s minutiae that might otherwise be overlooked…..

 

 

 

 

sleepless1993’s Sleepless in Seattle really holds up well after a couple of decades. Oh sure the technology is outdated a bit. If Annie (played by Meg Ryan) wanted to research Sam (played by Tom Hanks) nowadays all she’d need to do is check out his various social media profiles, and of course Sam could sift thru all those responses he got from lonely & desperate ladies by spending an evening on Facebook himself. But the heart of the story still resonates, with both Hanks & Ryan at the peak of their impressive careers. Hanks may have won awards or been nominated for other performances (Philadelphia, Big, Forrest Gump, Apollo 13), but Sleepless in Seattle is undoubtedly one of his best. I saw the film while I was spending that summer taking some college classes (I figured I may as well be productive) and I’m pretty sure I even had a date, although I can’t remember her name.

 

 

I’m not exactly sure what to think or say about the whole Kim Davis thing. Davis, of course, is the Kentucky county clerk who recently spent some time in the clink after refusing to issue same sex marriage licenses. I have to tip my cap to Davis for her strong faith. Christians in various parts of the world have been persecuted for their beliefs for many many many years, and we know that persecution will only become worse and more widespread as we reach the end times. We also know that The Bible tells us that homosexuality is an abomination. However, I am confident in saying that 95% of Christians in Davis’ shoes would have either bit their tongue & issued the licenses, or just resigned from the job. I include myself in that vast majority. I understand Davis supporters who say that she absolutely did not break any laws. The “legality” of gay marriage is based on a Supreme Court ruling and NOT on any actual law passed by a legislative body. But let’s be honest…whether or not we agree with the technicalities, the fact is the Supreme Court has been overstepping its boundaries and making laws for decades, and legislators kdhave allowed it to happen because they are too cowardly to take a stand on controversial issues and jeopardize their chance for re-election. That particular Pandora’s Box is open and we’re not going to get the animals back in the barn anytime soon…if ever. So the question then becomes did Kim Davis do the right thing given the fact that gay marriage is a reality whether one agrees with it or not?? Should she have issued the licenses anyway, thereby tacitly betraying her faith & denying Christ?? Should she have resigned due to the fact that, for personal reasons, she is unable to fulfill all of the duties of her position?? I don’t have the answers to those questions. I do know one thing…she should not have been put in jail. That was an extreme overreaction and only served to feed into the concerns that Christians have about mounting oppression in America. Whatever compromise was worked out allowing her to remain employed while not personally issuing same sex marriage licenses but permitting others in the clerk’s office to do so is what should have happened in the first place. This should have never been a story. I also think that folks on both sides of the issue have acted badly. Why did presidential candidate Mike Huckabee need to get involved?? Why did there have to be a press conference/pep rally upon Davis’ release from prison?? Conversely, the ugliness of non-Christians/haters has been abhorrent. Comments about Davis’ looks and her multiple marriages are out of line. No one knows what is in Kim Davis’ heart except God. She is a sinner just like the rest of us, but if she has given her heart to The Lord then her sin is washed away by the blood of Jesus Christ. Perhaps she came to Christ after the tumultuous path of life led her down some dark roads, including a few failed marriages?? I don’t know and neither do you, so name calling & insults only serve to betray the inherent malice of the Godless liberal mentality. No one in this debacle comes out looking particularly noble. It seems that this is a battle that will rage on, as the “LGBT community” clearly wants more than “fairness & equality” and Christians have finally awakened to the fact that they need to stand their ground against those who openly hate God and His teachings. We’re going to have to find some kind of common ground or everybody is just going to destroy each other.

 

 

electronic-devices-vectorSometimes I feel like all I get done is unplugging, plugging in, & recharging various electronic devices…laptop, phone, CPAP machine, tablet, digital camera, electric shaver. I embrace technology even if I keep it at an arm’s length, but it strikes me how spoiled we’ve become by all of these “conveniences”. My mother has been gone for 15 years and I often ponder what she might think of all this cool yet oddly absurd stuff we can’t seem to live without these days.

 

 

oldhostsIt is amazing how late night TV has nosedived into mediocrity practically overnight. I checked out the first few episodes of Stephen Colbert’s version of The Late Show on CBS. Ehhhh…it’s alright. That’s pretty much how I feel about Seth Myers, James Corden, Jimmy Kimmel, & even the much celebrated Jimmy Fallon. None are appointment television for me. I may channel surf thru each show occasionally, but I am just as likely to turn off the television and either read a book for a bit or simply go to sleep. Are all of these guys that much newhostsless talented or interesting than Johnny Carson, David Letterman, Jay Leno, Tom Snyder, or my man Craig Ferguson?? I don’t know. Probably not…they’re just different. I’m different. I am beginning to understand the aging process. I’m not the same person at 42 as I was at 22 or even 32. I think differently. I am entertained by different things. It’s nobody’s fault. It’s just life.

 

 

Republican-Debates-Live-Stream1The second Republican debate will be airing on CNN this week and I urge anyone who cares about our country and isn’t a hardcore Democrat/socialist to tune in. I know it’s early in the process. I realize that a lot of people think they “don’t care about politics”. However, do you understand what a privilege it is to live in a country where we can all participate in the discussion and cast an equal vote?? My father has a saying: you may not get your way but you can have your say. Your candidate may not win. My candidate may not win. We may be uninspired by any candidate. But we all have an opportunity to voice an opinion. And if you are going to have an opinion shouldn’t it be an educated one?? The first debate was really interesting…maybe one of the most fun things I’ve seen on TV in months. I suspect the second debate will be just as fascinating. This is the future of our nation folks. For pete’s sake Modern Family and America’s Next Top Model can wait. DVR them if you must. Learn. Participate. Be informed. It’s important.

Points of Ponderation…..Episode 4.15

A semi-regular attempt to address some of life’s minutiae that might otherwise be overlooked…..

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quitContrary to popular opinion, maybe sometimes it is okay to walk away. As children we are inundated with platitudes like “don’t ever give up” and “winners never quit & quitters never win”, but in the real world there are occasions where it might be best to make a course correction. A job you hate. A loveless marriage. A toxic friendship. A commitment or responsibility one can no longer adequately fulfill due to changes in life’s circumstances. Certainly one should ponder & pray before making any impetuous decisions…that’s obvious. However I think it is possible that there are situations where quitting might actually be the courageous & mature choice.

 

 
helmsI recently headed to the friendly neighborhood multiplex to check out the new reboot/sequel/follow-up to the 80’s National Lampoon’s Vacation series simply called Vacation. I didn’t hate it yet didn’t particularly like it either. You’ll have to wait for the year-end Sammy Awards for further pontification. For now though let me say that IF a sequel is given the green light (and I expect it will be) I have an idea. Citizens of The Manoverse are familiar with my love for Christmas movies, with 1989’s Christmas Vacation amongst my favorites. The new Vacation could…should…be followed by a Christmas Vacation sequel!! Clark & Ellen Griswold have a short cameo in the new Vacation, but their roles could be expanded in Christmas Vacation 2.0. Chevy Chase hasn’t aged well and Beverly D’Angelo has had more plastic surgery than Meg Ryan, but they still have the chops to pull off supporting roles as the wacky grandparents. They could come to visit Rusty & his family for the holidays. Leslie Mann as Audrey Griswold (who also is underutilized in the new Vacation) could come visit too (sans her weirdo husband). You might even throw in a grown-up Cousin Ruby Sue, Jane Krakowski could reprise her role as the original Cousin Vicki, & I believe both of the grandmothers (Doris Roberts & Diane Ladd) are still alive. If Randy Quaid ever regains his sanity and can legally return from his Canadian hideout an appearance by Cousin Eddie would be the cherry on top. The world needs more Chevy Chase/Ed Helms scenes!! I don’t have a fully formed plot in my mind, but I do know one thing…this film cannot be written and/or directed by the same guys who did the current one. They just don’t cut the mustard. Maybe Judd Apatow would be willing to take a crack at it?? He’s the closest thing we have to John Hughes nowadays. Come on Hollywood…make it happen.

 

 
ghettoOne of the definitions that Dictionary.com assigns the word ghetto is “something that is considered to be unrefined, low-class, cheap, or inferior”. I recently used the term to describe some classless language that another person had utilized. Not surprisingly I was immediately accused of being racist because that’s just what we’ve come to in 21st century New America. A person, situation, idea, or language can most certainly be considered ghetto without any kind of racial connotation, and anyone with a brain should know that, but it’s much easier and fashionable to consider just about anything & everything racist or otherwise offensive nowadays. People need to wake up & realize that if everyone was so sensitive in this country a couple of centuries ago we never would have achieved the greatness that once made the United States the world’s foremost superpower. I’m not politically correct. As a matter of fact I sometimes go out of my way to spit on political correctness just to annoy those who embrace such stupidity. If you’re not down with that then I don’t need to have you in my life.

 

 
argumentI think militancy is amongst the biggest problems our world faces. Are all Muslims bad?? Of course not. It’s the extremists that wreak havoc. I may not agree with homosexuality as a lifestyle, but I’ve had a few gay friends over the years who are quite lovely people. It is militant gay people who want to be given special treatment and put up on a pedestal that make things unpalatable. Is racism an issue?? Unfortunately yes. However I feel like many so-called “racists” are mostly hostile to militant minorities whose favorite pasttime is wallowing in victimhood and seeing racism in everything or fabricating it out of thin air. In other words, I am not so sure that it is the color of a person’s skin or their religion or their particular lifestyle that is the primary source of a lot of animosity. Much of the time disdain is a response to peoples’ behavior. If you act like an idiot people probably won’t like you very much regardless of your race, religion, sexual orientation, or anything else. Behave like a normal, polite, respectful, well-adjusted person and chances are you’ll probably get along just fine with most folks. It’s pretty simple.

 

 
trump2Not only did support for Donald Trump not diminish after his poor performance in the first Republican debate…his numbers actually went up. I get it…I really do. The disgust for the current occupant of The White House cannot be understated. Trump is an outspoken, politically incorrect rebel with nothing to lose. He definitely stands out from the crowd and people are into it. But I just don’t understand how anyone could have watched that initial debate and not become really nervous about him as the potential President of the United States. He doesn’t have any solid answers beyond tough talking sound bytes that appeal to the disgruntled masses. “Making America great again” is a really cool idea and I’m all for it, but at some point a candidate has to offer specifics. Trump is able to get away with meaningless platitudes and a defiant attitude that everyone thinks is awesome because right now no one is really paying attention and the field is so crowded that there’s really little opportunity for meaningful discussion. That will change, and when it does Donald Trump will have to convince voters that he legitimately believes what he is saying, explain his flip-flops/evolution on issues that he has leaned left on in the past, & temper his rhetoric enough that he becomes more palatable to judicious citizens that can’t be influenced by entertaining yet meaningless bravado.

Points of Ponderation…..Episode 3.15

A semi-regular attempt to address some of life’s minutiae that might otherwise be overlooked…..

 

 

 

 
mockingbirdSeveral months ago, when it was announced that To Kill A Mockingbird author Harper Lee would be publishing a 2nd novel a half century after her one & only triumphant effort in literature, I was ecstatic. Mockingbird is one of my favorite books, as it is for countless others. However, the book is out and I haven’t purchased a copy…and I don’t intend to in the future. In the time between the initial announcement and the appearance of Go Set A Watchman in bookstores a few things came to light. First of all, Harper Lee is nearly 90 years old, in poor health, & residing in a nursing home. There is some concern that a shady lawyer made this book deal happen, that Ms. Lee doesn’t have the mental capacity to have made the decision for it to be published, & that if she had wanted it published she would have done so decades ago. Adult Protective Services in Alabama allegedly investigated the situation and weren’t at all concerned, but I’m still a bit apprehensive. The book is now out there being consumed by the masses, and I have read some reviews. It turns out that Watchman…though it is being billed as a sequel to Mockingbird…was actually the original idea, and a gifted editor basically told Harper Lee “This doesn’t work, but there is an idea within it that will be good if you revise & cultivate it” (or something to that effect). That modification grew into To Kill A Mockingbird. Now, why in the world would I waste my time with something that an editor didn’t feel good about in the first place, something that evolved into one of our greatest novels only after a major renovation?? Why would I pay money for something that very well could be the result of elder abuse?? And then there is the matter of Atticus Finch…one of the most beloved characters in all of literature. I’ve watchmanseen spoilers. I know what the Atticus in Watchman is compared to the treasured Atticus in Mockingbird. Some may see it as a fascinating and maybe even logical evolution. That’s fine, but I don’t need that kind of negativity in my life. That’s the great thing about fiction…characters we love can stay frozen in time, always fondly remembered the way we left them. Sherlock Holmes will forever be riding hansom cabs & solving crimes in gaslit London. Santa Claus will always fly thru the air in his sleigh every Christmas Eve. Huck Finn & Tom Sawyer are still riding down the mighty Mississippi on a raft getting into mischief. And in my heart Atticus Finch will remain a man of deep character & unshakable honor fighting for the rights of the oppressed and teaching his children valuable life lessons.

 

 

lionI honestly couldn’t care less about lions or other big game being killed in Africa. It never ceases to amaze me what the media is able to manipulate people into stressing out about. I saw a story a few days ago about some 21 year old kid who buried his dog alive, and that incensed me way more than any situation in which a hunter bagged some prey. FYI the dog was thankfully rescued.

 

 

Let’s talk about baby names. No, I have not impregnated anyone and probably never will…unfortunately. A babiesFacebook acquaintance of mine is pregnant and recently asked for some ideas for names for her baby boy. I guess I’m a bit old-fashioned because I was truly stunned by some of the suggestions: Alonte, Killian, Easton, Boston, Ledger, Zade, Phoenix, Malice, Beckham, Canyon, Courtland, Maxim, Savon. These were (allegedly) serious responses and not ideas for an American Gladiators revival. Look, I understand gravitating toward less common names. The world is full of guys named Mike, John, Bob, Steve, Tom, Jerry, George, & Fred. I get it. But whatever name you saddle a child with is a burden that they’re going to have to carry for the rest of their lives. Legitimate studies have been done linking weird baby names to criminal behavior later on in life, and that’s not even counting the bullying a kid may suffer or the confidence & image issues they may have along the way. I apologize in advance if my opinion hurts the feelings of anyone with one of these odd names or parents who may have named their child something a bit outside-the-box. It isn’t my intention to offend. I just think that the world is tough enough and a person will encounter more than their fair share of adversity in the normal course of things…why start them off behind the proverbial 8-ball with a name that isn’t nearly as cool or hip as some may think it is??

 

 

gop2First impressions after the initial GOP Presidential debate:
• Donald Trump is style over substance. He’s entertaining and says what a lot of people would like to say & what many believe, but at the end of the day he doesn’t have the temperament, finesse, or applicable experience needed to be President.
• Marco Rubio & Ben Carson strike me as solid potential VP choices. Their stock could improve.
• Mike Huckabee is sincere, intelligent, & articulate…but not Presidential material. He could be a good cabinet member.
• If the GOP nominates Jeb Bush or Chris Christie it won’t play well with hardcore conservatives, a detriment that won’t be equalized with support from Reagan Democrats.
• Rand Paul is passionate, thinks outside the box, & brings some interesting ideas to the table, but I don’t see him as Presidential either at this point. I’m flexible though.
• I didn’t watch the undercard debate, but I hear that Carly Fiorina did well. Hopefully a few of those folks get an opportunity to make their case at the big table the next time around.
• Ted Cruz is my frontrunner, but Scott Walker has tremendous potential.
• Oh yeah…John Kasich was there too. I almost forgot. I’m not sure his campaign will make it to September.
• I wasn’t impressed with Fox News’ presentation or the performance of their moderators.
• This race doesn’t truly begin until the field is cut in half. That may take awhile.

 

 

My physician recently put me on a low dose of blood pressure medication and indicated that meds for high sodiumcholesterol could follow. I have 6 weeks to alter my lifestyle, and he suggested a website/app called MyFitnessPal to help track my dietary habits. In just a week I’ve already figured something out. I’ve been trying to eat low fat for awhile because I kind of saw these issues on the horizon, but one thing I’ve been overlooking is sodium. I am single, financially challenged, & can sometimes be lazy, which means I look for quick & easy eating choices. I am aware that fast food is mostly unhealthy, but in focusing on fat we shouldn’t ignore the contribution sodium makes to poor health. I have been paying more attention to such things and have been truly surprised at the enormous sodium content of a lot of foods. Pretty much anything that is prepackaged for our convenience is a minefield. Fruits & veggies have never been a big enough part of my diet, but going forward they’re going to have to be. That doesn’t mean I’ll never eat another cheeseburger, piece of chocolate cake, or bowl of pasta…it simply means that one should always partake in moderation.

Points of Ponderation…..Episode 2.15

A semi-regular attempt to address some of life’s minutiae that might otherwise be overlooked…..

 

 

 
My maternal grandmother lived in an apartment building for the last 20 years of her life and had what I call an open door policy, with various neighbors popping in & out quite frequently. A couple of people that Grandma was especially tight with would either just walk right in or do what I call the knock/pop in, where a person knocks once or twice and then comes right on in. I’m a little different. I keep my door locked most of the time, but on occasion when I forget to lock it I still expect the courtesy of someone knocking on my door. I also expect a person to stand there and wait for ME to open the door. Life isn’t an episode of Seinknock-clipart-k4295327feld and it’s not funny when a person bursts into someone else’s home like Kramer. This hasn’t been an issue for the vast majority of the time I’ve lived here, but there have been a couple of incidents. Several months ago a gentleman who lives in the building stopped by and knocked on my door. I was on the phone and not in the mood for company so I decided to just ignore the knock figuring that eventually he’d get the (obvious) hint and leave. I was wrong and eventually had to answer the door (which was locked). More recently, I was putzing about the apartment when I turned around and suddenly a person had appeared out of nowhere (I’d forgotten to lock the door). I just about jumped out of my skin!! The person claimed that they’d knocked and I have no reason to doubt their word, but a) they couldn’t have knocked very loud (timid knocking is a huge pet peeve of mine that we’ll address another time), and b) they popped in without waiting for me to answer the door. On both of these occasions I am not proud to admit that I flipped out and exhibited some rather rude behavior that left no doubt about my irritation. I regret those reactions to a point, but I also believe that people need to be more respectful of boundaries and learn some manners. Am I wrong??

 

 

Let me offer this about the Confederate Battle Flag…..
I’ve been trying to not say too much simply because arguments & strife are an unproductive waste of time that only end up making me upset. That being said, this whole issue has gotten stupid. Very few people seemed to be offended by that flag just a month ago. Most people didn’t care one way or another. It’s been a century & a half since The Civil War. Slavery is a far distant memory. Yes it was horrible. We can all agree on that. But that flag is simply that…a flag, an inanimate object, a harmless piece of cloth. I will spare you a history lesson about the war & the flag and just say that over the past several decades it has become a cultural symbol for rednecks, hillbillies, good ol’ boys, & southerners in general, folks that most would cflagagree are among the friendliest, well-mannered, most easygoing, & respectful people on Earth. Obviously I am painting with a broad brush, but that’s the point. Whatever some may think that flag once stood for (and most of those assertions are wrong), the fact is that here in the 21st century it is dukes2an innocuous symbol…a kind of mascot. The vast majority of people saying now that they are offended by the flag are only feeling that way because the media has planted the seed and blown something way out of proportion. Why?? Well, to some degree that’s just what they do nowadays, but more specifically it was a reaction to Jesus. What?!?!?!? Allow me to explain. After the tragic shooting at a Charleston, SC church last month the expected reaction was chaos, looting, & general lawlessness because that’s the script similar events seem to follow. However, the folks in Charleston threw the talking heads a curve ball. They mourned. They prayed. They joined together. They expressed forgiveness. Such values are confusing to the liberal elite media, so they had to stir the pot. Now because some mentally ill jackass was upset over a girl rejecting him I can no longer enjoy Dukes of Hazzard reruns. Does that make a lick of sense?? Of course not.

 

 

tagsI mentioned in the last edition of PoP that I’d been binge watching The Andy Griffith Show on Netflix. I’m still doing that, and I also recently re-watched the 1986 reunion movie Return to Mayberry (it can be found on YouTube if you are so inclined). To be honest it’s not a great film, even by made-for-TV standards. However, it did spark an idea that I’m willing to put out there for some enterprising young Hollywood executive to ponder. How about a new television show called Mayberry?? In the sequel series Mayberry RFD that aired for a few seasons in the late 60’s/early 70’s Andy Taylor and his bride Helen Crump returned for a brief visit and had a child they named Andy Jr. That young man would be in his mid-40’s by now. Maybe he wanted to follow in his father’s footsteps. Maybe he went into law enforcement. Maybe he’s been working somewhere in the big city but now has a desire to return to the place that he was born. Or maybe he came to live with his parents when they relocated from Cleveland back to Mayberry in 1986 per the reunion movie and never left. Either way Andy Taylor Jr. could be the sheriff just like his Daddy. Of course all of the original cast, with two significant exceptions, are dead. Only Ron Howard (aka Opie) and Betty Lynn (aka Thelma Lou) are still alive, but Lynn is quite elderly now and Howard is a big time film director who surely wouldn’t want to be in a TV series again (although he may be willing to do a few guest appearances if it is a well written & produced show). I never watched Mayberry RFD but I know Ken Berry, who starred as farmer Sam Jones, is still around. He may be willing to do some episodes as well. There are quite a few well-known folks who were guest stars on TAGS…Jack Nicholson, Barbara ideaEden, Jamie Farr & William Christopher (better known as Klinger & Father Mulcahy from MASH), Rob Reiner, Howard Hessman, Jerry Van Dyke, Morgan Brittany, Don Rickles…that may possibly be willing to be in an episode or two. I am normally against remakes & sequels and am a proponent of creativity & fresh ideas, but I really think this could work. The main cast (especially the role of Andy Jr.) would have to be strong, and it’d have to be its own show, not trying too hard to be a copycat of the original yet retaining its picturesque allure. The town of Mayberry would have changed a bit over the course of 50 years, but I think a TV show with good old-fashioned charm and small town values is exactly what the entertainment landscape needs these days, and I think the viewing public just might like it.

The State of The Manofesto – Legacy Edition

I’ve been pondering my legacy.

hangingoutI realize that sounds heavy, but everyone leaves a legacy. Some write books, record music, create art, or star in a TV show or movies that folks enjoy decades…maybe even centuries…after the person has left this mortal coil. On a lesser scale though, “regular”, “average” people bequeath gifts that are less widely celebrated but just as cherished by those in their orbit. Many leave behind children & grandchildren. Some lived life in such a way that their friends & family can share great stories about various adventures. Others have a level of professional success that leaves a trail for others to follow. We all have the ability to do little things like say a kind word, impart some homespun wisdom, make people laugh, and be involved in things to improve the greater good or make someone’s life better.

This train of thought came about after the recent passing of my old college pal Rob, a fraternity brother that was almost exactly the same age as me and who died tragically in a motorcycle accident. He & I had a lot of fun back in the day. We had only spoken once since then, a few years ago when we first reconnected via social media and he called me on the phone. We had a very pleasant conversation in which he tried to convince me to come to Montana and go skiing with him. After that we interacted the way most people do…online. But despite the lack of recency in our relationship I must admit that I cried the day that I found out about his death. To be honest it has affected me in a way I would have never expected. Other people I have known fairly well, worked with, or attended school with have passed on, but this one hurt on some deeper level. Many of my old friends on Facebook have expressed similar sentiment, and everyone has fond memories of Rob, who was a genuinely decent man.

“But what does any of that have to do with The Manofesto??” you may be asking. Well, let me explain.

I came to terms a few years ago with the idea that I am probably never going to get married or have children. Professional success not only has eluded me, I no longer crave it in any way. I just want to be able to pay my bills, feed myself & my dog, & maybe have a few nice things or go on some fun vacations. Doing work that I enjoy with colleagues that I like & respect would be a great bonus. So what about my legacy?? What is left?? The way I see it there are two things.

The first, and most important, part is the way I live my life and my relationships with people. There’s so smilemuch I could say about all of that, but this isn’t the time. I recall reading something awhile back that said “live your life in such a way that when you die the world cries and you rejoice”. How does one accomplish that? Lots of ways. Be kind. Smile. Example Christ. Laugh. Be a physical manifestation of The Fruits of the Spirit. Choose words wisely. Forgive. Uplift. Celebrate. Stay positive. Ignore worldly stupidity. When I take a good, long, hard look in the mirror I don’t always like what I see. I can do better. I will do better. For myself. For my family. For my friends. To honor my friend Rob. To honor God.

The other, lesser part of the equation is The Manofesto. It suddenly occurred to me that long after I am gone this blog will still be here. I’m no Doc Brown or Mr. Spock, but I can’t imagine that cyberspace is going to disappear anytime soon. Technology certainly changes. When I was a kid I used to tape songs I liked from the radio onto cassette tapes. Thirty years later I digitally download songs onto an overpriced phone. But I’m still listening to some of the same songs. Decades from now I don’t know how people will access information or how The Internet may evolve, but I think it is possible that The Manofesto will still exist. Assuming that is true it forces me to ponder content and consider things thru the prism of posterity. Heavy indeed.

I haven’t done one of these updates for a couple of years, mostly because I get mad at myself for saying I’m going to do something and then not following thru. Eventually I concluded that it is best not to tell people what you’re going to do…just shut up & do it. The flaw in that slaw in that there is no accountability. No one can ask me whatever happened with this or that if I never promise anything. That’d be fine…even preferable…if I wasn’t a motivationally challenged procrastinator, but I am so it’s not. If The Manofesto is to be part of my legacy (and it irreversibly is at this point), then I need to buckle down and finish what I start, be mindful of substance & subject matter, and respect the responsibility that I have taken upon myself.

laptopNone of that means that we aren’t still going to have some fun. I want to write about amusing things like movies, sports, music, & my fanatical love of Christmas. Putting a smile on someone’s face in the midst of a tough day or making a person chuckle a bit and lightening a surly mood is part of the mission…even if it’s my own tough day or surly mood. However, I also want to use this space to study God’s word and pontificate on other significant matters. I’ve done a bit of that, but not enough. I want to learn. I want to help y’all learn. I want to make you think. I want to read more books and write about them. I may or may not want to expand into writing some fiction. I want to grow The Manoverse. Maybe someday I’ll write a novel or finish a screenplay. Maybe I won’t. For now this is it, and if that’s the way things remain I think I’m alright with it.

Legacy is defined as “a gift transmitted from the past”. We all have skills & abilities. Most of the time they don’t make us rich & famous, but when used correctly they can have the power to make the world just a little bit better one person…one day…at a time, not only in the future but right now. What will your gift be??

Points of Ponderation…..Episode 1.15

A semi-regular attempt to address some of life’s minutiae that might otherwise be overlooked…..

–

Have you checked out CBS’s latest incarnation of The Late Late Show with new host James Corden?? I’ve been watching, but I’m not ready to render a final verdict just yet. Corden, a 36 year old Tony Award winning actor who bears a striking resemblance to Conan O’Brien’s sidekick Andy Richter, seems like a genuinely decent fellow with a terrific level of enthusiasm. One can tell he’s new at this and still trying to find his cordenstyle, but he’s gaining confidence with each show and has the kind of genial charm one would expect from an Englishman. I like the fact that he brings all 2 or 3 of his guests out at the same time and has a little group chat versus the normal one on one interview. I also like the fact that Corden doesn’t sit behind a desk during the interview, although it begs the question as to why the desk is really there in the first place if he’s not really using it. I’m not sure what to think about bandleader Reggie Watts. He’s got a unique look but doesn’t yet add as much value to the show as well-known late night musical directors like Doc Severinsen, Paul Shaffer, or Max Weinberg have provided to their respective programs in the past. It’s way way way too early to come to any concrete conclusions about Corden or the show, but my early impression is that I don’t hate it and see lots of growth potential. If you happen to be awake at 12:30am sometime you might want to give it a whirl.

 

 

questionWhat’s the difference between a babysitter and a nanny?? Inquiring minds want to know.

 

 

I’ve been seeing a lot lately about transgenderism. News stories. Stuff on my Facebook feed. Former Olympian and honorary Kardashian Bruce Jenner is reportedly “transitioning” into a woman. There’s even a soap opera (one that I don’t watch) that has begun a transgender story involving a longtime major female (or so they thought) trannycharacter. It seems like people are getting bored with homosexuality as a sociopolitical cause and are moving on to the next frontier. I feel the same way about both issues. Live & let live. Do your thing. But don’t try to convince me that you are simply seeking tolerance, acceptance, & equality. There is nothing brave, heroic, or inspirational about your choice. And make no mistake…that’s what it is, a choice. Wear whatever clothes you wish. Wear make-up. Have whatever hairstyle you want. But facts are facts. Biology is what it is. A person is either male or female and that can’t be changed without major elective surgery, and even then the truth is the truth. Like I said, do what you want. It’s a free country. Just stop expecting to be celebrated or treated as if your choice is perfectly normal & acceptable.

 

 

 

This is the funniest commercial I’ve seen this year:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v9YiTIYO-2A

 

 

 

 
Speaking of “alternative” lifestyles…..
I read somewhere that Disney’s Girl Meets World, the follow-up series to 90’s sitcom Boy Meets World, is kicking around the idea of adding a gay character. Now I am not going to dive into an angry, sanctimonious rant against homosexuality. Anyone who has been visiting The Manoverse for any length of time probably knows my stance on the andygriffithsubject. You may disagree and that’s okay. But let’s ponder something. Why do TV shows feel the need to “keep up with the times”, “reflect society”, or have “ripped from the headlines” stories?? I’ve been binge watching The Andy Griffith Show on Netflix and one of the greatest things about it is that, though it was produced in the midst of the turbulent & radical 60’s, none of that craziness is reflected in the show itself. There’s not a trace of any of the tumultuous issues that essentially divided the nation during that time. No discourse on racism. No contemplation of Vietnam. No counterculture meditation on sex, drugs, & rock n’ roll. It’s pure escapism, albeit with a value based moral compass. And a half century later TAGS is almost unanimously considered to be one of the greatest programs in the history of television. I would humbly suggest that modern TV shows should follow that example rather than trying so hard to be hip, cool, & edgy.

 

 

More Pickup Lines:
You can call me fireman cause I turn the hoes on.
Are you into conspiracy theories?? I wanna get illuminaughty with you.
My doctor says I’m lacking Vitamin U.
I’m no organ donor but I’d be happy to give you my heart.
Did you read Dr. Seuss as a kid because green eggs and damn!!
You must’ve had Lucky Charms for breakfast, because you look magically delicious.
If you were a vegetable you’d be a cutecumber.
Let’s be nothing because nothing lasts forever.

The 2014 Sammy Awards…Part III

SammyAwardWelcome back!! After a brief delay (to build suspense…yeah…that’s it…suspense) we have returned for the conclusion of the 2014 Sammy Awards. Please be sure to check out Parts I & II if you have not already done so.

 

 

 

 

After a moving tribute to the late Robin Williams by our host Billy Crystal as well as Whoopi Goldberg, Henry Winkler, Matt Damon, & Garry Marshall it is time to present our next award.

crystal2whoopiwinklerdamongm

 

 

 

 

Please give a warm ovation to a young man who is able to join us because his team stubbornly refuses to revamp a horrendous defensive secondary and therefore bigbenhas been eliminated from the NFL playoffs. Welcome to the stage the two time Super Bowl winning quarterback of the Pittsburgh Steelers…Ben Roethlisberger!! And the nominees are:

 

 

Biggest Sports Sports Story

 

 

The Winter Olympics
When the most memorable thing to happen during an Olympics is Bob Costas’ pink eye I think it means they’re doing it wrong.

 

 

Seattle Wins The Super Bowl
The Seahawks defense dominated Peyton Manning & the Denver Broncos in Super Bowl XLVIII (that’s 48 for those of you who might be here all night trying to utilize Common Core to figure it out…you’re welcome). Might we see a rematch in the near future?? It’s possible.

 

 

Derek Jeter Retires
I’ve never been much of a Yankees fan. Okay…I despise them for no apparent reason. However, Jeter has always seemed like a classy guy, and to my knowledge he was never accused of juicing unlike ¾ of MLB. He hung up the cleats last fall after two decades…all with the same team, which is a refreshing rarity, and got a game winning hit in his last at-bat, which was pretty cool even if the game itself was meaningless.

 

 

The World Cup
I’ve tried…I really have. But I just can’t get into soccer. Now the Quidditch World Cup…that I’d watch…maybe.

 

 

Lebron James Comes Home
Few have been harder on Lebron James than your humble Potentate of Profundity. The way he left the Cleveland Cavaliers a few years ago for the Miami Heat…with that idiotic television spectacle called The Decision…was asinine. However, I am a forgiving man and Lebron has apparently seen the error of his ways, especially in regard to The Decision. He has returned home to Cleveland, and even though things are a bit rough right now I have no doubt that he’ll have the Cavs in the playoffs this summer and in serious championship contention next year.

 

 

College Football Playoff
After decades of “mythical” national champions and BCS silliness college football finally got a 4 team playoff this season. The specifics & the methodology need some fine tuning, but I have to admit that the playoff committee ultimately chose the right four teams. The two semi-final games got monster TV ratings, and I am sure the title game will do so as well.

 

 

 

And the Sammy goes to…..

Lebron. Homecomings are always cool. I understand why he left even if I disagree with how he did it. He has grown up now and has different priorities. I hope there lebroncavsis a happy ending. The Cavaliers haven’t gotten off to the best start and have made some moves that seem kind of desperate. They aren’t winning a championship this season, and it looks like their current head coach probably shouldn’t be buying any property in Cleveland. I sincerely hope Lebron James doesn’t get frustrated & impatient and leave his hometown a second time. That would be horrible and might send me into the kind of rage that ends with a prison sentence even though I really couldn’t care less about the NBA. Until we get to that bridge though I will remain optimistic and believe that this will all turn out to be a really nice story.

 

 

 

The Charles Barkley Role Model Award

There isn’t a list of nominees for this award. There is only one nominee & winner. Lauren Hill is a 19 year old woman who was diagnosed with an inoperable brain praytumor a little over a year ago during her senior year in high school. The first thing Lauren wanted to know after her diagnosis was if she could still play basketball. She finished her senior year and set her sights on playing college ball. Lauren had already committed to Mt. St. Joseph University, a Division III program in Cincinnati, OH, before her diagnosis. In September 2014 a scan showed that Lauren’s tumor had grown and she was unlikely to make it to Christmas. Her dream was to play in one college basketball game, a goal that she achieved. Lauren got to play in 4 games before her health would not allow her to continue. She also utilized her growing notoriety to start a fundraising campaign for cancer research that has raised over $1 million. And oh by the way, the doctors were wrong…Lauren made it thru the holidays. She & her family are being assisted by hospice care, but she got to see one last Christmas & New Year’s. I don’t know Lauren Hill. I don’t know anything about her other than what I have read and seen on television. But one thing I do know is that Lauren chose life. She chose to battle this evil scourge called cancer to the bitter end. She achieved her goal and took time to do something helpful for others. Godspeed Lauren…I’ll keep you & your family in my prayers.

 

 

 

 

The following awards were handed out last weekend at an abandoned Ramada Inn just outside Detroit:

Most Annoying Song
Happy by Pharrell Williams

Best Commercial
ESPNU’s “Blind Date” and Budweiser’s “Friends Are Waiting”

Idiot of the Year
“Daredevil Naturalist” Paul Rosolie (the guy who was “eaten alive” by an anaconda for a Discovery Channel special)

Most Disappointing Movie
Sex Tape

Funniest TV Moment
Frank Caliendo reads Lebron James’ “Letter to Cleveland” in the voice of Morgan Freeman on Mike & Mike in the Morning

Biggest Mystery
The appeal & continuing success of Taylor Swift

Best Game to Play on Your Phone
Trivia Crack

Biggest Ingrates
Those who had an issue with a free U2 album being added to their iTunes library

 

 

 

 

Our next presenter(s) come to us via satellite. Please give a slightly puzzled welcome to infamous Brat Pack actor Rob Lowe, along with his pals Super Creepy Rob Lowe, Painfully Awkward Rob Lowe, Far Less Attractive Rob Lowe, Scrawny Arms Rob Lowe, Meathead Rob Lowe, & Crazy Hairy Rob Lowe.

rlrl2rl3rl4rl5rl6rl7

 

:

 

 

–

 

 

 

And the nominees are:

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Favorite Movie

Muppets Most Wanted
This is a follow-up to The Muppet Movie, which won The Sammy for Favorite Movie in 2011. Unfortunately this one lacks the same magic. Neither Jason Segel nor Amy Adams return from the previous film, and instead we get Ricky Gervais as a sinister criminal and Tina Fey as a German prison guard, as well as cameos from Tony Bennett, Puff Daddy (or is it P. Diddy??), Celine Dion, Lady Gaga, Josh Groban, & Ray Liotta. It’s not a bad way to spend a couple of hours, but just isn’t as charming as its predecessor.

 

God’s Not Dead
The premise is this…a college student decides to stand up to his atheist philosophy professor. It’s not a horrible film and is somewhat inspiring at times. Here’s the problem with this as well as other “Christian” films though…Christians will like it while non-believers will scoff (as non-believers are wont to do). So what exactly does it accomplish if it is “preaching to the choir”?? I don’t think this movie is going to convince anyone of anything as written. The idea is ripe with potential, but the execution is lacking. Nice try though.

 

Draft Day
Kevin Costner finally decided to do a sports film. Okay okay…I’m joking. We all know that Costner is the king of sports movies. This time he plays an NFL GM whose team (the Cleveland Browns) has the #1 overall pick in the upcoming draft (talk about realism!!). He’s not sure which player he wants to take, but we are introduced to three candidates: a cocky QB (sound familiar Browns fans??), a talented RB, & an underrated linebacker. The GM has some drama going on in his personal life too, but it’s really not that compelling. Draft Day is no threat to replace Field of Dreams, Bull Durham, or even Tin Cup as beloved Costner classics, but as a fictionalized behind the scenes look at the NFL Draft it is decently entertaining.

 

Boyhood
The critics are raving about this film. It is a coming-of-age story about a 6 year old boy and his slightly older sister being raised by their single mother in Texas. Their father (played by Ethan Hawke) pops in & out of their lives but is a good Dad. What is unique about Boyhood is that it was filmed over the course of 12 years, so we literally watch these two kids grow up in the space of a couple of hours. The same actors were used the entire dozen years. It is a fascinating & mesmerizing concept. However, there are a couple of issues. First of all the distinctive idea doesn’t have any kind of really interesting plot accompanying it. It is just about the ups & downs of everyday life…love, marriage, divorce, parenting, breakups, drinking, drugs, friendship, loss. It’s not that those things can’t be interesting, it’s just that I found myself asking “what is the point??” beyond the singular way the story is presented. The other issue is that the filmmakers and Hawke…an unabashed liberal…couldn’t resist taking a few political potshots along the way. These jabs were unnecessary and only distracted from my enjoyment of the film. Some things are better left unsaid.

 

A Merry Friggin’ Christmas
I love Christmas movies and I love Robin Williams. I had to check out one of his last projects. I’d be lying if I said that Williams’ demise didn’t have a negative impact on my perspective. The whole time I was watching I just kept thinking how worn down & disengaged he looked. This is not the enthusiastic, energetic, witty, full of life Robin Williams we all knew & loved. The story involves a somewhat alienated father & son taking a road trip back to the son’s house to fetch some misplaced Christmas presents for his children. It is funny in spots, but not nearly funny enough. This isn’t a movie the masses will be watching every Christmas in perpetuity like so many others.

 

Neighbors
Seth Rogan and his wife & kid move in next door to a fraternity house. Hilarity ensues. Mildly funny but mostly forgettable.

 

Million Dollar Arm
This is based on a real life story wherein a hotshot baseball agent mines the mean streets of India for untapped talent. It is somewhat charming but also mostly forgettable.

 

Blended
Adam Sandler & Drew Barrymore have teamed successfully before… in 1998’s The Wedding Singer and again in 2004’s 50 First Dates, both of which are the kind of solidly entertaining movies one is apt to watch multiple times, especially if it comes on some random TV channel on a lazy weekend. Will Blended become that kind of “modern classic”?? Ehhh…probably not. The duo portray two single parents whose initial blind date is disastrous, but then both inexplicably end up bumping into one another (with their respective children) during a vacation in Africa. We all know the inevitable conclusion, but we don’t care if the journey is satisfactory. I think there are just too many moving parts here that don’t allow us to focus on the central romance. Blended tries really hard and isn’t a terrible film by any means.

 

This Is Where I Leave You
Take the 1983 classic The Big Chill and cross breed it with 2005’s The Family Stone and you come up with this dramedy about a dysfunctional family forced to sit shiva for a week after their father’s death. I am usually a sucker for the dramedy format, but this one goes back & forth more than a ping pong ball. It can’t decide whether it wants to be funny or serious, and that uncertainty hurts the momentum. The cast (Jason Bateman, Tina Fey, Dax Shepard, Katherine Hahn, and many others) is outstanding, but probably a bit bloated. Adam Driver may be on the verge of superstardom as the bad guy in the new Star Wars movie(s), but I think his true calling is following in the footsteps of Vince Vaughn as the always likable ne’er-do-well. TIWILY is, overall, kind of a downer, but it has its moments.

 

What If
I love a good rom-com, and this is a good rom-com. Originally released internationally in 2013 as The F Word (no…not that F word), it was finally released in North America in 2014 after the politically correct name change. Daniel Radcliffe sheds his Harry Potter persona quite nicely as a jaded young man who falls in love with a young woman he meets at a party. That young woman, portrayed by the enchanting Zoe Kazan (why she isn’t a bigger star is a mystery to me), has a boyfriend and immediately puts Radcliffe’s Wallace into “the friend zone”. Yes I know…we’ve seen this a thousand times and we all know how the story ends, but that’s okay as long as the script is well written and the cast is good. What If is kind of an updated riff on When Harry Met Sally, which is fine by me. Adam Driver shows up playing the same kind of aforementioned scalawag that seems to be his strength, and another captivating young actress named Mackenzie Davis that I am quickly developing an affinity for has a nice supporting role.

 

Heaven is for Real
This is a stronger effort in the Christian film genre than God’s Not Dead and is based on a true story. A 4 year old child becomes ill and has emergency surgery. After his recovery he begins to act strange and reveals to his family that he went to Heaven and saw God. His father is a minister in rural Nebraska and even he has doubts about his son’s claims. The small community doesn’t like the publicity that the story brings and ponders ousting the preacher. Greg Kinnear is an underrated actor and touchingly portrays the struggle of this minister and how his beliefs are shaken. Again, this is kind of “preaching to the choir” in that it’s the type of movie that will appeal mostly to believers, but unlike God’s Not Dead I think it has the potential to give fence sitters some food for thought.

 

That Awkward Moment
Three 20-something dudes suffering from a severe case of arrested development agree to stay single in solidarity with one another. Of course immediately thereafter they all find themselves in relationships. Complications arise…some of them funny, some of them not-so-much. I haven’t decided if I like Zac Efron or not, but I do know that if he wants to ever be taken seriously as an actor he has to grow beyond these juvenile frat boy parts. I do like up n’ comer Miles Teller, and the aforementioned Mackenzie Davis has a supporting role.

 

Jersey Boys
This is a well-executed biopic about the legendary 1960’s band Frankie Valli & The Four Seasons and is based on a Tony Award winning play. The actors are all Broadway vets and do their own singing, which is impressive. I learned a lot about Valli and his pals, which isn’t saying much since the only thing I knew before was the music. It is amazing to ponder what heights The Four Seasons could have achieved if everyone would have stayed on the same page and maintained a laser focus on their collective success. Alas life has a way of interfering and stuff happens. As it is though the foursome ended up with five #1 hits, sold over 100 million albums, and were inducted into the Rock n’ Roll Hal of Fame in 1990. Not bad, right??

 

Saving Christmas
IMDB users have quickly crowned this the worst movie of all time, which I think is rather harsh, especially considering competition like From Justin to Kelly, Glitter, & Gigli. Look, I realize that Kirk Cameron is a polarizing figure. Even some Christians don’t like the guy. But I have to give him credit for making this effort. I’m not sure I completely agree with all of the theology, but there is some decent food for thought here. Santa was a badass?? Who knew?? Saving Christmas wasn’t exactly what I was expecting, and I think the same points could have been made in a more acceptable format, but this is far from the worst film ever made. Haters are just gonna hate I guess.

 

 

 

And the Sammy goes to…..

 

 

 

What If. I have to be honest…I didn’t go to the movies as often as I would have liked in 2014 and there were several films I didn’t get a chance to see. In a relatively whatifweak field What If stood out. Is it a bit derivative?? Sure. But that can be said about a lot of things. The fact is that the masses enjoy this kind of story and that’s why filmmakers keep churning them out. Many crash & burn, while some are just distinctive enough to carve out their own spot in the crowd. This is the latter. Don’t worry Harry Potter fans…Daniel Radcliffe is going to do just fine as a muggle.

 

 

 

 

To present our final award of the evening The Manofesto is honored to bring back a man that had so much fun presenting in 2012 that he called and asked if he gwbcould participate again. His presence has the added benefit of annoying liberals which is always fun. Please give a warm welcome to the former President of the United States…George W. Bush!! And the nominees are:

 

 

 

 

Biggest News Story

WV Water Crisis
In the early days of January 2014 there was a chemical spill into the Elk River in the capitol city of Charleston, WV. Nearly 300k residents in 9 counties were without drinkable water for several days. The owner of the plant where the spill occurred, Freedom Industries, filed for bankruptcy within a week of the incident.

 

Malaysian Airliner Mystery
2014 was a tough year for Malaysia Airlines. In March a plane carrying over 200 passengers disappeared mysteriously somewhere in the Indian Ocean. No debris was ever found and conspiracy theories popped up, mostly from people who had been a little too into that TV show Lost. Was the plane hijacked by terrorists?? Was North Korea somehow involved?? Are the passengers alive somewhere on an island hanging out with Gilligan, The Professor, and the dude from Cast Away?? We’ll probably never know. To make matters worse another Malaysia Airlines flight crashed in July, killing nearly 300 passengers. But atleast we know that plane was shot down by a Russian missile. The moral of the story is don’t ever fly Malaysia Airlines…like ever.

 

Ebola in America
Ebola is the kind of deadly Third World virus that we usually read about in National Geographic, but in 2014 it hit very close to home. About 10 people in the U.S. were diagnosed with ebola. Two people died. Most of those contracted the disease outside of America and a couple were nurses that contracted it while treating ebola stricken patients. Some say the concern was overblown, but it is human nature to fear what we do not know.

 

Ferguson, MO Race Riots
Back in August an 18 year old black man was shot & killed by a white police officer in Ferguson, a suburb of St. Louis. Some say Michael Brown was a nice kid who was gunned down by a racist cop. Others believe that Brown was a thug and that Officer Darren Wilson was just doing his job after Brown had robbed a convenience store then resisted arrest and assaulted the officer. Unfortunately the former opinion touched off violent protests, vandalism, & looting that lasted for weeks. Ultimately Officer Wilson was not indicted by a grand jury but understandably resigned from the Ferguson PD.

 

Same Sex Marriage Spreads
Same sex marriage became legal in an additional 19 states in 2014, meaning that it is now legal in about 35 states. And that’s all I have to say about that.

 

Secret Service Ineptitude
Look, I’m no fan of President Obama, but that doesn’t mean I want to see him get kidnapped or murdered. The Secret Service is supposed to protect the President 24/7/365, but in 2014 there were…issues. There were atleast two incidents of unauthorized, ordinary people just waltzing into The White House unnoticed, while an unauthorized and armed security guard for the Centers for Disease Control somehow gained access to an elevator and took a little ride with the President while he was visiting Atlanta. Come on folks…get your stuff together.

 

Robin Williams’ Suicide
I have been a huge Robin Williams fan since I was a kid. He was a brilliant comedian and an even better actor that could do dramatic and funny roles with equal aplomb. I knew he had battled substance addictions in the past, but I wasn’t aware that he also suffered from severe depression. On 8/11/14 that vibrant, talented, complicated life came to an abrupt & all too premature conclusion when Williams ended his own life. I am usually not that invested in any actor/comedian/singer/celebrity. They come, they go. Their stardom shines bright for a short time and then it fades. But I have to say that I was rocked by this tragedy. Oh sure…not all of his movies were winners, but so many of them were and we assumed that there’d be more. I am not an expert on clinical depression, but I find it profoundly sad that someone who seemed to have it all didn’t feel his life was worth continuing. I am sad for his fans who will never be able to look forward to another awesome performance or even a funny appearance on a late night talk show, and I am sad for a family that has lost a husband & father.

 

ISIS
ISIS stands for Islamic State of Iraq and Syria. They are a group of Muslim terrorists that have a penchant for kidnapping people and then cutting off their heads. In 2014 ISIS beheaded atleast a couple dozen people, including a few Americans. I am sure the videos are available somewhere online, although I am not sure why anyone would want to see that. But don’t worry folks…Islam is a religion of peace. They mean no harm and there is nothing to be concerned about. And also I have some lovely beachfront property in South Dakota that I am willing to sell for three Hershey Bars and a tricycle. Call me!!

 

Mid-Term Election Republican Sweep
In November 2014 the Republicans gained control of the U.S. Senate, increased their majority in the U.S. House of Representatives, and gained an additional two governorships. Even here in WV Republicans took control of the legislature for the first time in…forever (I think). Unfortunately controlling the U.S. Congress won’t mean a thing as long as Rep. John “Tears” Boehner and Sen. Mitch McConnell are in charge and willing to bend over to kiss Obama’s…ring.

 

Veterans Administration Scandal
My father is a veteran and has received acceptable care with various issues from the local VA Hospital, but I guess not everyone has been so lucky. Apparently dozens of patients have died while trying to wade thru weeks & months of red tape & waiting lists in the past several years. Investigations are ongoing.

 

Terrorists Kidnap School Girls in Nigeria
In April 2014 nearly 300 teenage female students at a school in Nigeria were kidnapped by a Muslim terrorist group (them again) called Boko Haram. Months later only a few of the girls had been rescued. A couple escaped. A few were killed. Supposedly many of them have been taken to various other countries and sold into slavery. The inept Nigerian government has done basically nothing, and the only U.S. response was to express anger on Twitter (#BringBackOurGirls), as if that’ll accomplish anything.

 

 

 

And the Sammy goes to…..

Ferguson. I don’t know exactly what happened, but I do know a few things. I know that Michael Brown wasn’t an innocent kid. It’s simple…don’t commit robbery or ferg1any other kind of crime and the police won’t have the opportunity to shoot you. I know that the reaction was way way way over-the-top. I don’t get looting. People need to mind their own business. If a guy down the street from me gets beaten or shot by the cops…right or wrong…why in the world is that a reason for me to walk downtown, set fires & bust out windows, and steal a TV from the local electronics store?? It’s idiotic. As far as we’ve come with race relations in America in the previous 3 or 4 decades it feels as though we’ve gone backward in the past few years. I am sure that there are bad law enforcement officers out there, but I think the vast majority do a damn fine job. It’s not their fault that black males are about 6% of the American population but are almost half of the prison population in the U.S. ferg2That’s not racism…it’s fact. Yet we have whackjobs like pretty much the entire lineup of MSNBC talking heads that see racism in e-v-e-r-y-t-h-i-n-g, and people like “Rev.” Jesse Jackson & “Rev.” Al Sharpton (aka The Justice Brothers) that make a living out of stirring the pot. It’s pathetic and insulting. And while it is tragic that a young man lost his life in Ferguson it is also sad that a lot of other people lost businesses & property because people decided to use that tragedy as an excuse to act like animals and compound the issue exponentially. Can’t we all just get along??

 

 

 

 

 
rip

actor/comedy legend Robin Williams…retired Pittsburgh Steelers head coach Chuck Noll…actor/writer/director Harold Ramis (Caddyshack, Ghostbusters, National Lampoon’s Vacation, Groundhog Day, Animal House, Analyze This)…radio personality (and voice of Scooby Doo’s pal Shaggy) Casey Kasem…baseball Hall-of-Famer Tony Gwynn…SNL announcer Don Pardo…retired boxer Rubin “Hurricane” Carter…comedians Sid Caesar, Tim Wilson, Joan Rivers, & David Brenner…NBA Hall of Fame coach Jack Ramsay…former Israeli Prime Minister Ariel Sharon…entertainment columnist Marilyn Beck…pro wrestlers Nelson Frazier Jr. (aka Mable, Viscera, Big Daddy V) & Sean O’Haire…S. Truett Cathy (founder of Chick-fil-A)…sportswriter Bill Conlin & Bryan Burwell…actresses Lauren Bacall (Key Largo, The Shootist, All I Want for Christmas), Shirley Temple, Carmen Zapata (Santa Barbara, Sister Act), Ruby Dee, Ann B. Davis (Alice on The Brady Bunch), Polly Bergen, Elaine Stritch, Marcia Strassman (Welcome Back Kotter), Elizabeth Pena (La Bamba), Jan Hooks (Saturday Night Live), Carol Ann Susi (The Big Bang Theory), & Mary Ann Mobley (Diff’rent Strokes)…baseball Hall of Famer Ralph Kiner…author Gabriel García Márquez (100 Years of Solitude)…singers Phil Everly (1/2 of The Everly Brothers), Jerry Vale, Jimmy C. Newman, Pete Seeger, Jimi Jamison (Survivor), & Joe Cocker…former Haitian President Jen-Claude “Baby Doc” Duvalier…WV businessman & philanthropist “Buck” Harless…former mayor of Pittsburgh, PA Sophie Masloff…actors James Garner (The Rockford Files), Mickey Rooney, Phillip Seymour Hoffman (Scent of a Woman, The Big Lebowski, Almost Famous), James Rebhorn (Scent of a Woman, Meet the Parents), Bob Hastings (General Hospital, McHale’s Navy), Russell Johnson (The Professor on Gilligan’s Island), Dave Madden (Reuben on The Partridge Family), Maximilian Schell (Judgment at Nuremberg, Deep Impact), Ralph Waite (The Waltons), Richard Bull (Little House on the Prairie), Efrem Zimbalist Jr., Bob Hoskins (Who Framed Roger Rabbit?, Hook), Meshach Taylor (Designing Women), Eli Wallach (The Godfather Part III, Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps), Charles Keating (Another World), Sir Richard Attenborough (Jurassic Park, Miracle on 34th Street remake), Ed Nelson (Peyton Place, Capitol), Ken Weatherwax (Pugsley on The Addams Family), & Edward Herrmann (Gilmore Girls, narrator for History Channel)…retired MLB players & managers Don Zimmer & Jim Fregosi…former Washington Post editor Ben Bradlee…producer/writer Arthur Rankin Jr. (Rankin/Bass Productions)…retired U.S. Senator Jim Jeffords & Congressman James Traficant…musicians Tommy Ramone, Paul Revere, & Johnny Winter…Hall of Fame pro wrestlers Ultimate Warrior, Ox Baker, & Mae Young…journalist Garrick Utley…NFL owners Ralph Wilson (Buffalo Bills) & William Clay Ford (Detroit Lions)…former White House press secretary Jim Brady…Ken Forsse (creator of Teddy Ruxpin)…retired race car driver Gary Bettenhausen…poet Maya Angelou…MLB player Oscar Taveras…game show hosts Jim Lange (Name That Tune, The Dating Game) & Geoff Edwards (Chain Reaction)…retired pro wrestlers Billy Robinson & Jimmy Del Ray…TV sports director Sandy Grossman…Watergate conspirator Jeb Stuart Magruder…retired NFL players Earl Morrall, Rob Bironas, Orlando Thomas, & Robert Newhouse…voice actor (Tony the Tiger) & pro wrestling announcer Lee Marshall…songwriter Arthur “Guitar Boogie” Smith (Dueling Banjos)…former Cy Young Award winning pitcher Bob Welch…former Senate Majority Leader & White House Chief of Staff Howard Baker…former Baltimore Orioles GM Frank Cashen…fashion designer Oscar de la Renta…retired tennis player & instructor Vic Braden…Marshall University President Stephen Copp…crackhead & mayor of Washington, DC Marion Barry…director Mike Nichols (The Graduate, Biloxi Blues, The Birdcage)