Playing the Trump Card

trump3In the waning days of the 2016 Presidential Election I had a revelation. The news media was dutifully covering both campaigns, albeit with their less-subtle-than-ever-before left wing slant. There was Hillary Clinton on TV with Jay-Z. Hillary with Beyonce. Hillary with Miley Virus…uhhh…Cyrus. Hillary with Springsteen. Hillary with Katy Perry. And then there was Donald Trump…in front of massive crowds…just he & his peeps. That’s when it suddenly dawned on me…the point that most were completely missing. Trump didn’t need to be accompanied by a rock star. Trump IS the rock star.

 

I still had my concerns heading into election night. God has a sense of humor so He had arranged for me american-flag-1to be at work instead of home, a safe distance away from social media, an arena that has occasionally gotten me into hot water. Fortunately I was able watch the numbers slowly roll in on television. It was a fascinating exercise to channel surf and see just how incongruent the coverage was amongst the various outlets. They all seemed to have differing numbers. Some were VERY reluctant to call states in favor of Trump. But at the end of the day the result could no longer be denied. Donald Trump is going to be the 45th President of the United States.

 

reliefI found myself feeling…not excited, but more relieved about Trump’s victory. It’s no secret that I never thought he’d receive the Republican nomination. I was a Cruz supporter. As a professing Christian I cannot condone Mr. Trump’s general egotism, his alleged attitude toward & treatment of women, or some of the specific off-the-wall things that he has said. More importantly, I have not been completely convinced that he is on the same page with myself & fellow conservatives in regard to many of our deeply held core beliefs. Having said all that, the alternative was even less appealing. The Clinton family has been a cancer for America. Their level of dishonesty, thirst for political power, & alleged criminal behavior is much more bothersome to me than Trump trying to convince Billy Bush that he’s some kind of studly ladies’ man who can have any woman he wants at the snap of a finger like Fonzie. Trump is my Dad’s age. Sure all three of his wives have been significantly younger and extremely beautiful, but at some point that magic runs out no matter how rich & famous the old man is. Just ask Hugh Hefner. There came a time when it was no longer cool to worship at Hef’s feet in the grotto at the Playboy mansion…it evolved into being kind of sad & gross. Donald Trump is many things but stupid isn’t one of them. He is perfectly aware that Melania is better than anything he has a right to expect at this point. Everything else is meaningless talk. Classless?? Immature?? Offensive?? Okay, I’ll give you that. But don’t feed me a line of bull equating what he refers to as “locker room talk” with sexual assault or rape. It’s a false equivalency, more of the histrionic hyperbole thatbible11350 has become a defining liberal characteristic. And don’t believe any man who says that he has never engaged in such conversation because that is a flat out lie. Some may do it more, some less…but at one time or another every red-blooded American straight male has made lewd & lascivious comments about the fairer sex. You might not like it but that’s the truth. When pondering Donald Trump I can’t help but think of Israel’s King David, an adulterer & murderer that nevertheless was a man after God’s heart. I won’t pretend to know what is in Mr. Trump’s heart, but I do know that The Bible is full of far worse people who God found a way to use for His purposes.

 

map-crimeThe aftermath of the election has been concurrently fascinating & disheartening. If you look at the electoral map it immediately becomes obvious that the only reason the results were even remotely close is because Mrs. Clinton predictably won in large cities like New York, Washington DC, Philadelphia, & Chicago, as well as the biggest part of California. Funnily enough if you look at a map of high crime areas in America it almost overlaps exactly with the electoral map, meaning the Democrats have the amoral thug demographic all sewn up. Of course most of us already understood that, and it has been proven by pathetic attempts at “protesting” by whiny assclowns upset at the result. Yet I’M deplorable?? Social media isn’t any better, with all kinds of negative reaction ranging from sadness, heartbreak, & disbelief to righteous indignation, anger, & calls for assassination (and by the way…those idiots need to be prosecuted). I have been particularly perplexed by those exhibiting some level of fear. Really?? What exactly are people afraid of?? If you’ve done nothing wrong there is no cause for concern. So you’re a Muslim. Okay…as long as you aren’t involved with ISIS or any other terror activity (a 50/50 proposition at best) you’ll be fine. Women?? Don’t worry…you’re still going to be allowed to murder babies at will for the foreseeable future. Roe v. Wade has endured Presidents & Congresses of both parties for over four decades. No matter how one may personally feel about the issue the fact is that the law isn’t going away anytime soon. Immigrants?? Well, as long as you are here legally there is no listencause for concern. If you are here illegally I’m not sure what to tell you…maybe you should worry, but don’t look for much sympathy. The “LGBT community”?? This one is especially perplexing. Donald Trump expressed tremendous respect for such individuals during the campaign. He even said that he thought everyone should be able to use whichever bathroom they want. He has conveyed no ambition to reverse laws legalizing same sex marriage. At one point I even thought his opinions on these issues might cost him the nomination. So what exactly are gay folks afraid of?? I suspect you’ll have no better friend in Washington DC than Donald Trump.

 

cyrusMuch of this melodrama has been promoted & perpetrated by actors, singers, & athletes who are under the mistaken impression that we give a damn what they think. Let’s be clear about one thing in case anyone hasn’t figured it out yet…just because a person is exceptionally talented at singing, acting, or playing with balls does NOT make them an intelligent person whose sociopolitical opinions actually matter, and a huge takeaway from this election is that the views of such people are NOT representative of the vast majority of America. Do celebrity types have a right to an opinion?? Of course. But I think it’s really ironic that conservatives & Christians are constantly accused of shoving our beliefs down others’ throats while the rich & famous get a free pass on using the bully pulpit of fame to propagate a false notion that their dogma of deviance is normal. This election was not only a rejection of President Obama’s “hope & change” and “fundamental transformation” of America, it was a huge flip of the bird to Rosie O’Donnell, Michael Moore, Cher, Amy Schumer, Stephen Colbert, Chelsea Handler, Barbara Streisand, Madonna, George Lopez, et al. Before the election my friend Slack, the rare raging liberal that I can actually deniro2tolerate, posted a thoughtful Facebook status about the lifelong friendship between actors Jimmy Stewart, a diehard Republican, and Henry Fonda, a staunch Democrat. The problem with that comparison is that Hollywood lacks the elegance today that it had back when those gentlemen graced the silver screen. Perhaps that perception of old Hollywood was all smoke & mirrors, and it is undeniable that 24/7/365 television coverage as well as The Internet exposes & magnifies people beyond the boundaries of their profession, but when one sees actors preach the virtue of gun control then star in movies full of violence, or singers criticize Mr. Trump for demeaning women then get up on a concert stage half naked and demean themselves…well, it’s really difficult to take anything they say seriously. Voters tend to frown on hypocrisy.

 

If Democrats want someone to blame for this crushing defeat they need to look no further than the nearest mirror. To be fair the cult of mirrorpersonality worked out well for them the last two elections. Barack Obama was elected twice mostly because of the color of his skin. Liberals decided that it was time for America to elect our first black President and luckily Obama is charismatic and can deliver a hell of a speech (as long as his teleprompter is functioning properly), which was a marked improvement over Jesse Jackson back in the 80’s, and so the young Senator from Illinois was anointed. They believed that same thought process would allow Hillary Clinton to shatter the vaunted glass ceiling and become America’s first female President, but a funny thing happened on the way to the White House. First of all, Clinton lacks the magnetism possessed by both her husband Slick Willie and Obama. She is about as appealing as Kathy Bates in Misery. Secondly, while Obama’s negligible track record concerned some people eight years ago it also meant that he had few skeletons in his closet and the ones he did have weren’t pounced on by anyone lest they be labeled as racist. Conversely, Mrs. Clinton has been in the public eye for decades…First Lady, Senator, Secretary of State. She tried to hide her history of lies & deceit, and Lord knows the media did its best to give her cover, but the pungent stench of corruption made her an undesirable candidate. Plus, it turns out that she received millions less votes from black folks than Obama, which proves that race is more meaningful than ideology to a big chunk of the electorate…just not the ones you’d assume if you buy into the media’s false portrayal of Republicans as racists.

 

cnnAhhhhh yes…the media. Mrs. Clinton probably needs to assign part of the blame for her demise to her friends at many of the major newspapers as well as most of the talking heads on broadcast & cable news. They’ve always exhibited left wing bias, but it used to be so subtle that one really had to pay attention to catch it. Now?? Heck, Helen Keller could’ve felt the prejudice shown in this election cycle. These people pulled off the impossible…they made Donald Trump an underdog for whom people were feeling sympathy!! That’s quite the parlor trick. Their once understated leftist slant has evolved into outright lying & subterfuge, but since the rise of “new media” like conservative talk radio & The Internet they no longer have free rein. The truth…if I may borrow a phrase…is out there for anyone willing to seek it, and the result is a significant paradigm shift. Oh sure there will always be willful ignorance…people whose sole focus is their kids’ soccer game, where they can score their next fix of booze & nicotine, or who received roses on The Bachelor last night. But when elections are decided by razor thin margins the role of the media definitely has an impact, and in 2016 many folks had enough of the dishonesty exhibited on TV & in the papers.

 

So now we look forward to the next four years of the Trump Administration. I scoff at those who act like this is The End. Personally I have constrather modest expectations. I suspect he will surround himself with tremendously smart & capable people. He has already backpedaled on getting rid of ObamaCare, which I find intriguing. How has a law that has only been in effect a couple of years become so indispensable that many believe it’d be nearly impossible to repeal?? Abortion & gay marriage aren’t going away, but then again neither is the right to keep & bear arms. We know that the new President already has a Supreme Court appointment to make, and with a Republican majority in both the House & Senate one can be hopeful that the nominee will be a right-leaning jurist who respects The Constitution. Trump may even get an opportunity to make a few more Court appointments in the next 4-8 years. He is undeniably unproven in the area of foreign policy, so who he chooses for his cabinet and as advisors will be very important. Obviously he doesn’t come across as a particularly spiritual man, but I do hope that the issue of religious freedom is addressed. Where Trump will either earn his keep or insure a one term presidency is economics & job growth. It is likely that he will approach things in a completely different manner than your typical bureaucrat. Will that be a good thing?? We’ll see.

 

relaxLook, all I am saying is calm down…it’s going to be alright. I am cautiously optimistic. You can be upset that your candidate didn’t win. You can ridicule a President-elect whose politically incorrect pomposity has caused eyebrows to raise. But if you are shaking in fear or rioting in the streets you really need to grow up & seek professional help. Or better yet, how about paying attention and seeking the truth rather than giving any credence to what a bunch of vile, out-of-touch celebrities think. It’s a new dawn…a new day…and we should all be feeling…okay.

Points of Ponderation…..Episode 5.16

A semi-regular attempt to address some of life’s minutiae that might otherwise be overlooked…..

Dear Facebook…

I appreciate the “People You May Know” suggestions, but there are issues. Just because I have one or two friends in common facebook-147with someone doesn’t mean that I know that person. Perhaps we should set the bar a little higher…like maybe 10 friends in common?? Of course the flip side of that is that if I have 50 friends in common with someone the odds are that I do know them and there is a reason I’m not friends with them on Facebook. Perhaps we went to high school together and they were a popular kid that didn’t know I existed. Or maybe they were in a fraternity or sorority that I interacted with in college but I thought they were a jackass back then and have no interest in catching up two decades later. I understand that it is a complicated algorithm to perfect, but I think a billion dollar company that revolutionized social media can do better.

head-scratch2So the History Channel, A&E, and Lifetime (Television for Women) have teamed up for a remake of Roots. Seriously?? Can’t we just leave the classics alone??

I’m just gonna leave this right here…

abortion

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Speaking of social media, I have a pet peeve…

screenCitizens of The Manoverse will recall that as part of the annual Sammy Awards I do an RIP section dedicated to notable individuals who have passed on during the year. It began as a parody of the In Memoriam segment of the Academy Awards but has evolved into a responsibility that I take rather seriously. Because of this I am usually able to vaguely recall when a person died. Therefore it annoys me tremendously when someone on Facebook posts an article about a celebrity death as if it just occurred recently when in reality the person passed away several years ago. Come on folks…read the articles. Don’t just blindly post something and make yourself look uninformed & oblivious.

 

 

Yep…exactly…..

MTV

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I’ve been refraining from too much sociopolitical commentary lately, a) because it’s a pointless endeavor in a world that’s gone toh Hell in a handbasket, and b) I’m already on a low dosage of high blood pressure meds so I’m trying to be prudent. However, let me just say this about Harambe, a 17 year old silverback that was recently shot to death by staff at the Cincinnati Zoo. Is it sad that Harambe is dead?? Of course. Nevertheless, the powers-that-be at the zoo made the right call. A toddler had gotten into the enclosure and was in danger. Anyone with a brain would choose human life over an animal any day…or atleast I’d hope so. I know there are a bunch of animal lovers out there claiming that Harambe was actually trying to be protective of the child, and video seems to support that notion. I also know that gorillas are said to be very intelligent. However, gorillas possess strength atleast 10x that of a healthy adult human male but not the means to understand that fact. The animal may not have had any intention of harming the child but likely would have if swift action had not been taken. The shocked crowd certainly had no intention of spooking Harambe and making the situation worse yet they undoubtedly did. The choice made was the only logical choice. As far as the parents of the child are concerned, I cannot be overly critical because I am not a parent myself and also because I was not there. Word on the street is that these might not be the most stellar caregivers in the world. Dad has a pretty long rap sheet and some say that Mom was being inattentive to the child. That being said, we all know that things happen. Kids can be sneaky quick. Hopefully the parents learn a valuable lesson from all of this, and the folks in charge at the zoo will likely re-examine safety measures and try to tighten things up a bit on their end. It is a tragic end for Harambe, but it could have been so much more horrific all the way around.

 

 

Because I am here not just to entertain but to educate…

doggiesmeatcookies

For a person trying to refrain from sociopolitical commentary I suppose I’m doing a lot of it today, but something must be addressed…

obama_dr_evilI think it was bad form for President Hussein Obama to do yet another apology tour…this time in Hiroshima, Japan…right before our Memorial Day here in the United States. And people wonder why so many hate this man?? To be honest I don’t understand why anyone with better than a grade school education respects him. He’s disgusting.

Points of Ponderation…..Episode 2.16

A semi-regular attempt to address some of life’s minutiae that might otherwise be overlooked…..

A few thoughts on the sad death of Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia…
No, I don’t believe he was murdered. However, one can’t blame conspiracy types for atleast pondering the idea. The Obama scaliaAdministration has proven itself to be untrustworthy and vociferous opponents of the kind of traditional American values & Godly principles of which Justice Scalia was such a staunch guardian. Secondly, despite what many of my Republican friends have advocated, I do not think President Obama needs to step aside and let the next President fill the vacancy. The Constitution gives the President the power to nominate someone and so he shall. That being said, it is then up to the Republican majority in Congress to block anyone who would tip the scales of justice to the left. That’s how this is supposed to work. It’s how it’s always worked. Unfortunately, conservatives have absolutely no confidence that Congress will hold up its end of the bargain. If another radical liberal is somehow confirmed then the only chance our nation has to weather the storm is to elect the correct person to The White House in November and hope that President will get an opportunity to swing The Court back in the right direction with as many as three nominations (Ruth Bader Ginsburg is 82 years old, Anthony Kennedy is 79, & Stephen Breyer is 77). The big question is how much damage would be inflicted in the meantime. THAT is why the 2016 Presidential Election is SO important. It is not the economy, it isn’t immigration, it’s not tax policy. Those things are important, but the key to the election is deciding who we trust to fill up to three vacancies on The Supreme Court. Barack Obama is black, and lots of people think he’s cool…but the fact is that the idea that he now has the opportunity to make such a monumental impact on the nation’s highest court is scaring the crap out of people. Think about that. We can’t make that same mistake again.

 

 

Time for a little shameless self-promotion…
Awhile back I had an idea for a March Madness-esque tournament involving movies from the 1980’s (you know…the era of John Hughes, teen angst, The Brat Pack, synthesized theme music, & Tom Cruise before he lost his damn mind) called 80s Movie Mania. I published the intro not long ago and there are some quick polls that need votes (as there will be throughout the process). So if this is your first visit to The Manoverse or if you’re someone who only occasionally pops in and may have missed that introduction please take a gander and cast some votes. I really want The Manofesto to be interactive and this is a fun way to get involved. Thanks in advance.

 

 

jebPart of me feels bad for Jeb Bush. He seems like a good guy, and by most accounts he was a fine governor in Florida. His downfall was twofold…bad timing & being third. Let me explain. In almost any other election in American history Donald Trump would be seen as a fringe candidate and his run wouldn’t have lasted more than a few months. But in 2016 people are SO fed up with politics as usual and “the establishment” that being an outsider, thinking outside the box, & being non-PC really resonates with the masses. Couple that with Trump’s deep pockets and his brash attitude (a quality celebrated now rather than shunned as it would have been in the old days) and you’ve got a formidable entity that is difficult to defeat. Secondly, Jeb Bush is following in the footsteps of both his father and brother…one a former VP & one term President who people like but doesn’t necessarily stand out as being one of our best leaders, and the other a recent President who received much harsh criticism & derision (whether it was justified or not is a legitimate argument). A Bush has been President or Vice President 20 out of the past 36 years. In a political climate where being amongst the Washington insider elite is seen as such a negative Jeb’s last name was an inescapable albatross…fair or unfair.

 

 

Dear writers of The Big Bang Theory:
I love your show…have since Day 1. I appreciate how you have developed the characters over the years. Leonard & Penny are now p1a married couple and Penny has grown from a blonde bimbo with a pipe dream of becoming an actress to a p4young professional with a solid job. Howard Wolowitz has went from a lecherous horndog to expecting a child with his lovely wife Bernadette. Raj has had some romantic ups & downs but atleast now he is able to talk to women. The inexplicable romance of Sheldon & Amy has blossomed and both have become more at ease interacting with other human beings. The fact that TBBT is in its 9th season but still gets fantastic ratings and most fans have not expressed any significant fatigue or desire to move on from the show is remarkable. However…having said all of that…I do have a bone to pick. I understand that TBBT is a sitcom and alcoholism probably isn’t a subject y’all want to take on. That’s understandable because alcoholism isn’t funny. So, why then does Penny…a 30 year old woman…have such an obvious drinking problem?? Why is she constantly drinking alcohol, talking about drinking alcohol, or joking around about alcohol?? I repeat…it’s not funny. 18-22 year olds who drink a lot are fodder for comedy because they are college students (or atleast in that demo). 30+ year olds that are still getting wasted on a regular basis are just kind of sad & pathetic. Drunk Sheldon Cooper (even though he is in his 30s) is amusing because we know that he didn’t have a normal p2childhood or youth and doesn’t really grasp the concept of partying like most young adults have done at p3one time or another. But I can count one hand the number of episodes in nine years where Sheldon became intoxicated, whereas Penny drinks wine and makes some kind of smartass remark about getting drunk in nearly every episode. It’s almost tragic and needs to stop. Come on folks…you’ve proven you can do better.

The Sammy Claus Wish List 2011

Yes West Virginia, there is a Sammy Claus. I exist as surely as chocolate, fast food, Facebook, & soap operas exist, and I know that they abound and give my life its joy & meaning. Alas! How would The Manofesto exist if there were no Sammy Claus?? It would be really dreary, like being married to a Kardashian or cheering for the 2011 Indianapolis Colts. There would be no Internet then, no high definition television, no cute puppies to make tolerable this existence. We would have no enjoyment, except in sleep & dreams. The eternal light with which bachelorhood fills the Manoverse would be extinguished. Not believe in Sammy Claus?? You might as well not believe in lower taxes & self-reliance!! Nobody sees Sammy Claus, but that doesn’t mean there is no Sammy Claus. The most real things in the world are those that neither Stevie Wonder nor The Who’s Tommy can see. No Sammy Claus?? Thank God I live, and will live forever…or atleast hopefully for another several decades. A thousand years from now, nay, ten times ten thousand years from now, my legacy shall continue to make glad the hearts of bored & lonely web surfers everywhere.

For now though, you’ll just have to settle for the 2011 edition of the Wish List. As always, I yield no authority in making these dreams a reality and just have to hope that The Jolly Old Elf himself checks it out and may see fit to provide folks with the gifts which I am suggesting for them. Enjoy…and God bless us…everyone.

 

 

Detroit Lions DT Ndamukong Suh……….self control

 

 

Regis Philbin……………a very happy retirement

 

 

 

 

 

 

President Barack Hussein Obama………..crushing defeat in November & utter rejection by the American people of radical & destructive leftist philosophy

 

 

The Southeastern United States…….a mild 2012 hurricane & tornado season

 

 

Former Penn St. Assistant Coach

Jerry Sandusky……………….very slippery soap

 

 “Golden Voiced” Ted Williams……..continued sobriety, success, & happiness

 

Fans of The Kardashians………….better role models

 

Iraq………………….peace

 

The Cast of Harry Potter……..continuing relevance & achievement without being typecast or having to resort to desperate moves like hosting a game show or doing softcore porn on Cinemax

 

 

America…………………..more Jesus, less PC Godless liberalism

 

 

Heisman Winner Robert Griffin III…….a pro career more like Vinny Testaverde & Charles Woodson than Danny Wuerffel & Chris Weinke

 

 

My Family & Friends……………health, serenity, & dreams that come true

 

 

Christmas Eve & Christmas Day……………..a balmy 40 degrees with lots of sunshine. White Christmas can remain just a song & a movie.

 

 

My Alter Ego………………..the genuine Christian experience I have been seeking

 

 

New England Patriots Coach Bill Belichick……………………a hoodie

 

 

Amazon.com……………………inspiration for an improved Kindle Fire 2

 

 

Vegas………..my presence in 2012!! You hear that Greg, The Owl, Sealey, & Slack??

 

 

 

 

 

 

I shall wrap up with a quote from the Rankin-Bass animated classic Santa Claus Is Comin’ To Town:

“Lot’s of unhappiness? Maybe so. But doesn’t Santa take a little bit of that unhappiness away? Doesn’t a smile on Christmas morning scratch out a tear cried on a sadder day? Not much maybe. But what would happen if we all tried to be like Santa and learned to give as only he can give –  of ourselves, our talents, our love and our hearts? Maybe we could all learn Santa’s beautiful lesson and maybe there would finally be peace on Earth and good will toward men.”

 

 

 

 

 

The Inaugural Sammy Awards – 2010 Edition

Traditionally I do a Year In Review, a rundown of all the significant events of the past 12 months infused with my sardonic wit. However, I have decided to change things up a little. Every time one turns around there is an awards show on television, with insiders from all manner of industry patting themselves on the back, usually for maintaining the status quo level of mediocrity. So I got to thinking…why not me?? Why can’t I have my own awards?? And since this is my site and I can do pretty much anything I darn well please within the confines of decency and good taste that is exactly what I am going to do. Therefore, it is with pleasure that I present to you what I hope will become a long lasting annual staple here at The Manofesto. I present to you the inaugural edition of The Sammys.



Best Movie (That I’ve Actually Seen)



Hot Tub Time Machine

The powers-that-be wanted it to be the second coming of The Hangover, but it falls short of the mark. Still, it’s an entertaining movie with time travel and a fun cameo or two. I don’t feel like I wasted my time or money.



Shrek 4Ever After

Supposedly this was the final Shrek film. It has an It’s A Wonderful Life zeitgeist and isn’t a bad film, but at this point there’s just no juice left in the tank for the franchise and this fourth entry is nothing more than superfluous.



Grown-Ups

I have always been an unabashed Adam Sandler fan, even if his comedies are completely pointless and stupid. Unfortunately he (and an all star cast) attempt to have a point in this movie and it just fell flat. Or maybe it just wasn’t what I was expecting.



Toy Story 3

Now this is an example…hopefully…of a franchise ending on a high note. Don’t let the PR for 3D fool you…this movie doesn’t need gimmicks. These Toy Story movies are well written and have great performances, making the entire trilogy a cut above most animated fare.



The Social Network

I spend way too much time on Facebook, so I was excited to see a movie based on its origins. Even better, the script was written by Aaron Sorkin, the scribe behind TV gems like The West Wing and Sports Night.



And The Sammy goes to…..



The Social Network. Honestly, it was a close race, with Toy Story 3 a very very close 2nd. But I really enjoy Sorkin’s writing, and Jesse Eisenberg starring as Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg was mesmerizing. I even liked the performance of Justin Timberlake, who may want to consider giving up singing in favor of acting.




Assclown of the Year



Jay Leno

Leno should have walked away…it’s that simple. In the fall of 2009 Jay had handed over the reigns of The Tonight Show to Conan O’Brien and settled into his own 10pm show. Unfortunately the ratings for both shows were less than stellar so by January 2010 the suits at NBC panicked, wanting Leno back at 11:30 (for a half hour) and The Tonight Show at midnight. Conan, understandably, did not like this plan. Instead of ditching NBC and getting a late night gig somewhere else Leno played the “I just do what I’m told” card, going back to Tonight while Conan was unceremoniously dumped, albeit with a nice buyout. As of this moment Leno’s Tonight Show is going strong, while Conan’s new show…Monday-Thursday at 11pm on TBS…started out on fire but seems to be headed toward a downward spiral. Jay Leno, in my humble opinion, has shown his true colors, and he isn’t as nice of a guy as most thought a year ago.



Barack Hussein Obama, Nancy Pelosi, & Harry Reid

The three headed ultra liberal monster that has lead the Democrat Party the past couple of years cannot be separated. They work as one, in concert with one another, forcing upon an unsuspecting, easily distracted, sadly uninformed American public a quasi-Communist agenda that will have negative ramifications for decades. And besides all that they are just buffoons. Voters took a step in the right direction (pun unavoidable) last month by significantly altering the makeup of Congress, ensuring that Pelosi would not continue as Speaker of the House. But that is next year. In 2010 this unholy triple threat got a lot done, and most of it won’t be good for America in the long run. Your mileage may vary, and that’s okay.



Jim Joyce

On June 2, 2010 MLB umpire Joyce was working first base for a Detroit Tigers/Cleveland Indians game. Tigers’ pitcher Armando Galarraga was one out away from a perfect game. A close play at first was ruled an infield hit by Joyce, costing Galarraga a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity at perfection. Replays showed the runner should have been called out, and to his credit the umpire was deeply apologetic while the pitcher showed an unparalleled level of grace and class. Jim Joyce’s heartfelt remorse and frank honesty earned him a measure of redemption, but making such a critical mistake and screwing another individual out of a monumentally singular accomplishment, an opportunity Armando Galarraga will almost certainly never have again, dictates a nomination for this “honor”.



Ben Roethlisberger

Big Ben may be one of the top 5 quarterbacks in the NFL, but his off-the-field reputation took quite a hit in 2010. In March Ben was partying with college students at some dive bar in Georgia, which right off the bat seems below a 28 year old professional athlete. Even worse, he was accused of sexually assaulting a 20 year old co-ed in a bathroom. No charges were filed, but the district attorney, by the words he used in addressing the situation, seemed to strongly infer that it is likely something improper occurred but that it would be too difficult to secure a slam dunk conviction. NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell, who doesn’t have to answer to anyone and has no problem doing whatever he wants, suspended Roethlisberger for the first 5 weeks of the season. Roethlisberger rebounded nicely and has the Steelers on a roll, but the public perception of him is undeniably altered forever. Only two people know what really happened in that bathroom, but I believe that where there is smoke there is almost always fire. My prayers are with that young girl, that she can move forward as easily as the man who may or may not have raped her.



Tiger Woods

The self destruction of Tiger Woods actually began right around Thanksgiving of 2009, but by January 2010 the situation had spiraled completely out of control. For awhile it seemed like every day a different woman came out of the woodwork admitting to an affair with the very married golfer. To Tiger’s credit he didn’t try to deny the allegations, although how could he?? If one woman says she has slept with a married guy he can deny it, but when more than a dozen tell similar stories there is just no way out of the mess. Tiger’s indiscretions cost him his wife and tore apart his family. The situation also effectively destroyed his career, atleast in the short term. For over a decade Tiger Woods was unquestionably the world’s #1 golfer, mowing down the competition like no one since the classic Jack Nicklaus-Arnold Palmer rivalry years. That all changed in 2010, as for the first time in his professional life he did not win a single tournament, let alone one of the coveted “majors”. Before this scandal it seemed inevitable that Tiger would breaks Nicklaus’ record of 18 major championships, but now the possibility of that record being broken is much more in doubt. Woods lost a ton of money off the course too, as sponsors scurried away from him like roaches from sunlight. Some folks may never look at Tiger Woods the same, some have already moved on and anxiously await the day he re-ascends the throne as the much feared king of the links. We shall see what 2011 brings, but nothing can erase the horror that was the past 12 months.



Lebron James

Speaking of kings, we must nominate basketball’s King James, the modern NBA’s biggest star. Up until 2010 Lebron seemed like an excellent role model for the league. He comes across as intelligent, thoughtful, well spoken, and likeable. I always thought he was reminiscent of Magic Johnson, with the amiable smile dialed down and replaced with Michael Jordan’s competitive intensity. The exclamation point was that, after deciding to come straight out of high school in 2003 the Akron born & bred Lebron was drafted by his hometown Cleveland Cavaliers. All that was lacking was a storybook ending, i.e. the kid leading the team of his childhood from the cellar to an NBA Championship. Unfortunately that was not how the story ended. Instead Lebron decided to go into full diva mode, stringing the Cavaliers and several other teams along during a long, self aggrandizing process at the end of which King James ditched the small market Cavaliers and “took his talents to South Beach”, aka the glitz & glamor of Miami. I have no issue with a free agent deciding to go to another team where he thinks the chances of long term success are more solid. This is America, and Lebron James simply took advantage of the opportunities afforded to him within the system by which the NBA runs. That is fine. What I and many others took exception to was the arrogant way the situation was handled, culminating in a TV special on ESPN called The Decision, during which James took a full hour to tell us what he could have said via Twitter or a normal news conference in about 30 seconds. There is a way to conduct business and a way not to conduct business, and it’s a lesson Lebron James has yet to learn. When I look at him now I don’t see intelligence, thoughtfulness, or likeability…I see a spoiled child whose amazing, God given athletic talent has provided for him a lifetime of being coddled to and put up on a pedestal. Funny thing about pedestals though…they are really fragile and easily come crashing down.



And The Sammy goes to…..



Tiger Woods. A huge part of me would love to give the award to James, but at the end of the day what he did was within the rules and probably a smart business decision, even if the process was gone about awkwardly. Tiger, on the other hand, committed adultery…over & over & over again. I am not trying to be judgmental, just honest. What Tiger Woods did destroyed his personal life AND his professional life, and completely changed the public perception of him as a human being. I am quite sure he will get his game back and win more tournaments, but I doubt if he ever completely recovers from a series of monumentally stupid decisions that were obviously made with the wrong head.



Best TV Show



The Big Bang Theory

The adventures of two super intelligent but socially awkward nerds and their gorgeous, blonde, airheaded next door neighbor. It’s an old fashioned sitcom with rapier sharp wit, excellent writing, and a talented cast.



Mike & Mike in the Morning

If shows like this would have been around 30 years ago the course of my life would have been so much different. I mean really…two guys getting paid to sit around talking about sports for four hours every day??What a great gig!! It’s a radio show that is simulcast on television’s ESPN2 each morning from 6-10am, starring an Odd Couple-esque pairing of ubernerd sportscaster Greeny and former journeyman NFL lineman Golic. I am not generally a morning person, but this is appointment TV for me.



Entourage

Male bonding at its best. HBO’s series have been hit & miss in my opinion. I never watched The Sopranos or Oz and unlike the werewolf/vampire enamored masses I have no interest in True Blood, though I did enjoy Sex & the City and Six Feet Under, and have occasionally watched Hung, Curb Your Enthusiasm, & Big Love. But from the moment it hit the air in 2004 I have been enamored with Entourage. It is the ongoing adventures of popular young actor Vincent Chase and his posse of friends, including an older brother who is also an actor but not a very good or sought after one, his manager who also happens to be his best childhood friend, and another buddy from the old neighborhood in Queens named Turtle who doesn’t seem to serve any useful purpose. Then there is Ari, an agent…a manic, foul mouthed, hyper, over-the-top, ultra Type A personality whose antics are mesmerizingly hilarious. HBO doesn’t really adhere to what we tend to think of as a normal television season (usually a couple dozen episodes beginning in the fall and ending in the spring, with summertime being a bunch of reruns). Entourage runs in the summer and has somewhere around a dozen episodes per season, and it is literally almost an entire year between seasons. I think this has the effect of “absence makes the heart grow fonder”, because I get excited when I know a new season is on the horizon. Sadly 2011 will mark the 8th and final go round for a great show, but there is talk of a potential film franchise. When that happens I am SO there.



How I Met Your Mother

Anyone who still thinks of Neil Patrick Harris as early 90’s wunderkind doctor Doogie Howser hasn’t watched this show. Is it kind of a Friends ripoff?? Maybe kinda sorta. But it has a vibe all its own and is a completely fresh take on the NY City apartment dweller posse genre. There is even an element of The Wonder Years, as the entire show is framed as a flashback wherein a narrator (Bob Saget) is showing his children thru supposed flashbacks how…well…how he met their mother. It doesn’t seem like a show that’s been on the air five years, which is a testament to the writers and actors who keep things crisp and funny. Harris is a revelation as a vain womanizer that doesn’t resemble Doogie one bit. It’s a show that doesn’t necessarily cover new territory, but does a type of familiar, comfortable comedy in ways that keep the viewer interested.



Pawn Stars

I must give a shout out to my friend The Owl for introducing me to The History Channel’s documentary show about a family owned Vegas pawn shop. On the surface it would seem like a limited concept, but I find it fascinating. The family dynamic between the three generations of men who own & operate the shop is real and amusing, and each episode is like a mini history lesson since the stuff folks bring in to pawn/sell isn’t your usual junk, or at least the producers are intelligent enough not to show the mundane, pedestrian items on TV. Instead we see things like Civil War memorabilia, early 19th Century firearms, and rare coins. I don’t feel like I’ve completely wasted my time after spending 60 minutes with this program, and with all the crap on our televisions these days that’s saying something.



Hawaii-Five-0

Remakes are generally cause for a healthy dose of skepticism and railing against lack of creativity or imagination. I have to admit I was a little hesitant to check out this “reimagining” of the legendary 1970’s show, of which I have a vague childhood recollection. This apprehension was not only because it is a remake but also because cop shows are a dime a dozen and I’ve never really been a big fan of any of them. However, I was wrong and this is a good show on all fronts. Once again no new ground is broken, but I think what I have realized is that is a good thing. I like my comedies formulaic and my dramas to fit a certain mold. Hollywood seems to royally screw things up when they take a proven formula and try to make it unique and modern. This applies to both movies and television. I guess I am just an old fashioned kind of guy. I can usually guess who the real villain is about 10 minutes into the show, but that’s okay. The acting is solid and the writing is above average even if the plots are a bit predictable.



And The Sammy goes to…..


Mike & Mike. I love this show. It has no offseason and no reruns. Both Greeny & Golic seem to take copious amounts of time off, but even when one or both are gone the regular lineup of guest hosts adequately fills the chairs. Sports lends itself to this format because there is always always always something going on and more than enough topics to discuss. The guests and experts that call into the show add depth, and various subject matter is examined from all angles. The show can be irreverent and fun, but also serious and thoughtful when necessary. Mike & Mike may not be everyone’s cup of tea, but for the serious, hardcore, die hard sports fan there is nothing better.





Best Water Cooler Topic



Twilight

I’ve never read the books or seen the movies. I most likely never will. However, I do realize I am in the minority.



The Late Night Wars

During the first few months of 2010 a dominant subject of conversation was the controversy surrounding NBC’s bungling of its late night lineup, Leno’s return to The Tonight Show, and the unfair ouster of Conan O’Brien. Things were made all the more hilarious by late night hosts David Letterman and Jimmy Kimmel, who didn’t hesitate to use their shows as a forum to jump into the fray and show support for Conan. It was definitely a fun ride while it lasted.



The End of Lost

Yet another subject on which I am not really qualified to comment. I never watched the show even though I had numerous friends tell me they thought I’d love it. I suppose by the time I considered giving it a whirl I just knew it was too late. This was a show one had to have been in on since the beginning, and for those that were the end came too soon.



World Cup Soccer

Well…it is the world’s most popular sport, so I am sure people were buzzing about it somewhere…probably outside of The United States. All I know is…speaking of buzzing…I learned what a vuvuzela is and think it may be something a lot of folks will encounter again in the fiery pits of Hell.



Sandra Bullock/Jesse James Split

America’s Sweetheart (now that Meg Ryan is all Botoxed up) found out her tattooed biker husband was cheating on her with an even more tattooed biker chic. Shocker. But hey, atleast Bullock won an Oscar.


Apple’s iPhone 4 & iPad

I’d love to have an iPad, but I’m not paying $800 for one. I do have an iPhone, but have not upgraded to the 4 because it seemed superfluous and unnecessary. Still, I have to give Apple credit for getting folks excited about these items, even if it is just tricky marketing of products that don’t really do anything new or special.



True Blood

Yet another show I have never watched and never will. I really don’t get America’s fascination with werewolves and vampires.



Oprah’s Final Season

Faithful citizens of The Manoverse will recall my deeply held belief that Oprah Winfrey is a minion in Satan’s Army. It does my heart good to know that we are now in the midst of her final season. Yes, I am aware that she is going on to helm her own network, but hopefully she will remain behind the scenes and it will be a channel I can completely ignore, like Lifetime, QVC, or MSNBC. Farewell Oprah, and good riddance you obnoxious shrew.



Bristol Palin on DWTS

Surprisingly enough Dancing with the Stars is a show I do watch. I find it fascinating, and appreciate the talents of the professional dancers. Scantily clad hot women may have something to do with it too I suppose. Anyway, when it was announced that former Alaska Governor, former VP candidate, future Presidential candidate Sarah Palin’s eldest was to be a contestant on the latest season of the show it got some attention. Sarah Palin is a lightning rod that people either adore or despise, so the hype was predictable. It turns out that poor Bristol dances about as well as Jar Jar Binks on acid and has the personality of stale rice cakes, but somehow she still made it to the finals of the competition. This brought about a myriad of conspiracy theories, but in essence it just exposed DWTS for the popularity contest it really is and validated Sarah Palin’s level of popularity, despite her shortcomings.



And The Sammy goes to…..


The Late Night Wars. Admittedly this is a very personal, biased choice, because as noted some of 2010’s hottest topics were things in which I just had no interest whatsoever. But late night television has long been a favorite of mine, so the real life soap opera that viewers saw play out each night on TV for several weeks was extremely entertaining in my world.




Biggest News Story



The Haiti Earthquake

2010 got off to a rough start in Haiti, the poorest nation in the western hemisphere, when a 7.0 magnitude earthquake hit on January 12, killing nearly a quarter million people (roughly the population of Birmingham, AL) and affecting atleast a million. American citizens of all ilks offered humanitarian aid, spearheaded by former Presidents George W. Bush & Bill Clinton, and singer Wyclef Jean.



Unemployment

Despite President Obama’s plucky enthusiasm about the economy finally being in recovery mode, unemployment has still lagged around the 10% mark all year. I’m no economics guru, but I don’t think it is accurate to say the economy has recovered if nearly 10% of the population can’t find a job.



The Gulf Oil Spill

On April 20, 2010 an explosion on an offshore oil rig 40 miles off the coast of Louisiana set off what would become the biggest disaster in the history of the petroleum industry. It took three months for the well to be capped and the oil to stop flowing. In those three months over 200 million gallons of oil spilled into The Gulf of Mexico, causing extensive damage to wildlife and marine life, the delicate ecosystem, the fishing and tourism industries, and the general economy of an area covering 68,000 square miles. The U.S. Government and British Petroleum engaged in a battle of wills over responsibility and cleanup efforts, with neither party coming out looking all that impressive. The effects of this spill continue to this day.



Obamacare/National Health Care Reform

In March of 2010 President Obama and a Congress controlled by liberals passed a nationalized health care bill. This was a topic that had been hotly debated for years and successfully defeated at first, but eventually resistance was futile. I like to refer to an old Ronald Reagan quote that says “the nine most terrifying words in the English language are: ‘I’m from the government and I’m here to help.’” Conversely, a growing majority of Americans seem to be perfectly comfortable with The Nanny State, wanting Big Brother to take care of their every need from birth thru death. Any law that takes free choice away and fines a person who chooses not to be insured scares the hell out of me. Any law that enacts anything resembling end of life counseling, making whether an ill person will or will not be treated an economic decision makes my skin crawl. Any law that rations how much health care folks may receive is troublesome. I fear that this massive expansion of governmental power will lead down a lot of other even more frightening roads, and that the masses will not truly understand what havoc they have opened the door to until it is much too late.



The Death of Senator Robert C. Byrd

West Virginia’s senior Senator was 92 and had been a fixture in Washington DC for well over 50 years when he died back in June. Byrd served three terms in the House of Representatives and nine terms in the Senate, impressive considering the fact that his role as a public servant was preceded by serving as a leader in a local Ku Klux Klan unit, once writing The Grand Wizard and saying “The Klan is needed today as never before, and I am anxious to see its rebirth here in West Virginia and in every state in the nation.” Boy we sure can pick ’em here in The Mountain State, huh?? Byrd later renounced his membership and appeared to have a change of heart, but one can easily assume that was just the politically expedient thing to do. During his decades in Washington Senator Byrd became an extremely powerful figure and was able to funnel a lot of much appreciated pork back home to WV, which is obviously why he kept getting re-elected. Anyway, it is not my intention to kick a person when they’re down…or dead. So let me just say that Byrd’s death may not have been that big of a deal elsewhere, but here in West Virginia it was huge news.



The Tea Party

A year ago no one would have believed that the late Ted Kennedy’s Senate seat would be filled by a Republican, but in January 2010 that is exactly what happened when Tea Party backed Scott Brown won an election in Massachusetts. The Tea Party is not an officially recognized political party, but more of an energetic movement based on conservative core principles of reduced government spending, lower taxes, strict interpretation of The Constitution, and debt/deficit reduction. It sprang up in 2007, really hit its stride in 2009, and in 2010 had an impact of everything from the midterm elections to Dancing with the Stars. The de facto leaders seem to be former Alaska Governor Sarah Palin and former Speaker of the House Newt Gingrich, among others. The Tea Party was instrumental in costing several RHINOs (Republicans in Name Only) victories in primary elections in atleast a dozen states, and helped Republicans take back control of The House of Representatives. Liberals and their fluffers in the drive-by media have been predictably derisive of the movement, calling followers Tea Baggers. However, sticks & stones may break bones but name calling has thus far done no good in slowing down the momentum of this unofficial yet powerful organization.



2010 Midterm Election

Tuesday 11/2/10 was a day when, if I may borrow a phrase, chickens came home to roost for liberals in our nation’s capitol and elsewhere. Republicans gained 6 seats in the Senate, took control of the House with a swing of 63 seats, won an additional 6 Governorships, and gained 680 seats in statehouses nationwide. No matter how the media tries to spin it the election was a total rejection of liberal policies championed by President Obama, outgoing Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi, and Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid (who inexplicably won re-election). However, the work for conservatives has only just begun, with the next vital step being to find a viable Presidential candidate for 2012 (i.e. NOT Sarah Palin).



The Ground Zero Mosque

Back in the spring of 2010 plans were made public for what became known as The Ground Zero Mosque. The building is actually going to be a community center two blocks from Ground Zero, but it will have a Muslim “prayer center”, so the controversy aroused by having such a facility that close to where thousands of Americans were massacred by Muslim extremists/terrorists is understandable. I can see both sides. On one hand it is a free country and folks can build what they want where they want within the boundaries of the law. On the flip side I get how the idea can be perceived as offensive and distasteful. It just amazes me how the masses seem to bend over backward to make provision for Islam while even hinting at anything related to Jesus brings forth scorn and mockery.



End of Don’t Ask/Don’t Tell

In 1993 The Clinton Administration signed into law a policy prohibiting the military from inquiring about a person’s sexual orientation since being openly gay was considered just cause for discharge. At the end of the 2010 Congressional session this law was repealed and the military ban on being openly gay lifted completely. I have made my faith based beliefs about homosexuality and issues like same sex marriage quite clear over the years, but if someone is willing to serve their country and put their life at risk in the defense of freedom then that’s fine with me.



The Arizona Immigration Law

I am still blown away by the fact that anyone would have an issue with laws being enforced, which is all this law does – make sure existing laws are followed. Give us your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to be free?? Okay…fine. But if you are going to come into is country and take advantage of all the freedom, liberty, and other benefits then I don’t think being required to jump through a few hoops and following a legal process is too much to ask. Predictably it’s been the whiny, bleeding heart ultra libs who’ve cried about this bill the most. These are the same people who are ready to fine me if I choose not to buy health insurance, yet they have no problem with undocumented illegal aliens running rampant, eating our food, enjoying our public services, and utilizing our resources all while thumbing their noses at our laws and receiving a free ride because if they aren’t legal then they darn sure aren’t paying taxes. Yeah, that makes perfect sense. To my knowledge this law is still languishing under red tape, with various legal protests preventing it from being put into effect. I hope 2011 brings about an end to these silly court proceedings and sees laws like this spread nationwide.



TSA Groping Controversy

The Transportation Safety Administration, specializing specifically in airport security, is part of the Department of Homeland Security, created after the events of 9/11. Not a bad idea. However, in November of 2010, new screening procedures went into effect, including x-ray scans that display images of passengers’ bodies to TSA officers and pat-downs in which TSA officers fondle passengers’ breasts, buttocks, and genitals. Sounds like every pervert’s dream job. Predictably travelers haven’t been too keen on these procedures, as many feel like it’s just a bit too invasive. A lot of crazy incidents have been reported, including folks being forced to remove prostheses, small children being patted down, and hot babes claiming they’ve receive some…extra attention (if you know what I’m sayin’). TSA agents fired back whining about how awful their jobs are because they have to touch fat people. The ACLU has gotten involved. Lawsuits have been filed. It’s a big mess. Shocking, considering it’s a government run program. “Don’t touch my junk” indeed.



And The Sammy goes to…..



The Oil Spill. Not that the other nominees weren’t worthy, but let’s face it…when we look back in hindsight at 2010 two words will automatically pop into our brains: oil spill. It was almost as big of a story as 2005’s Hurricane Katrina, with many similarities including slow response from the federal government, who’d rather take over our health care, hate rich people, and try to eliminate Jesus from the world altogether rather than doing things they actually should be doing. As for BP, I understand that it was an accident and accidents happen, but their response…or lack thereof…was even more painfully slow than the government’s, and when (now former) CEO Tony Hayward called the spill “relatively tiny”, stated that he wanted “his life back”, and was then spotted at a yacht race while oil was still spilling into the Gulf the American public had its whipping boy. My prayers are with the people of the Gulf Coast, many of whom hadn’t even recovered from Katrina yet and now they’ve had to endure the ramifications of this situation.




The Rosie O’Donnell Memorial Just Go Away Award



Justin Bieber

I’ve honestly never listened to one of his songs, but the tastes of 12 year old girls are notoriously bad and the kid needs a haircut. If rumors about Bieber starring in a remakes of Grease and Back to the Future come true I may finally decide humanity is beyond redemption.



Glee

I watched this idiotic show once. It might be the gayest thing I’ve ever seen on television, no disrespect to alternate lifestyles intended. The acting was bad, the singing was not much better, and the overt sexuality was troubling. Honest to God Glee makes Dawson’s Creek look like freakin’ Shakespeare.



Kim Kardashian

Is she hot?? Yes. But what other redeeming qualities does this bimbo have?? Atleast Britney Spears can kind of sing and Lindsay Lohan can act when she stays sober. Kardashian and her entire clan add nothing of substance to the human race.



Jersey Shore

Reality shows, as a general rule, are awful. So a reality show about a bunch of clichéd Guidos just can’t be good. I have watched a few times and was completely unimpressed and not entertained in the least. People that are entertained by such garbage make me sad.



Lady Gaga

I saw Gaga on an episode of Saturday Night Live several months ago, and you want to know something interesting?? She can sing. The gal has some pipes. So why does she have to hide behind the stupid name & outrageous outfits and sing crappy songs about sex with lyrics like “bluffin’ with my muffin’”?? Take off the stupid clothes, use that great voice to sing quality songs, and use your real name (Stephanie something-or-other) and maybe I’ll be interested.



Stephen Colbert

I just don’t find him funny. It has nothing to do with politics, as Bill Maher is also a raging lib yet I find him rather amusing.



Brett Favre

If there has been a sadder public figure in 2010 I’m not sure who it would be. Favre has annoyed football fans for the past few years with his on again/off again retirement/comeback act. Last year he had what was arguably the best year of his career yet fell short of leading the Minnesota Vikings to the Super Bowl. Favre is to football what Mario Andretti was to the Indy 500…so close so many times but always felled by bad luck, karma, timing, or whatever other negative forces in which one may believe. After playing his annual “Will he or won’t he??” game again last summer he was predictably cajoled into “one last season”, only this time I think Bret Favre really is finished. The Vikings, beset by injuries, poor leadership, a midseason coaching change, and other calamities, have been horrible. Favre’s 41 year old body has finally let him down, and his consecutive games streak was broken at 297. On top of that the aging quarterback has been mired in an embarrassing scandal in which he is accused of sending naughty text messages…complete with pics of himself au naturel…to a female reporter a couple years back when he was playing for the NY Jets. You’ve heard of sports stars who “went out on top”?? This is the direct opposite.



Katy Perry

Is she hot?? Yes. But come on…put on some clothes for pete’s sake. No one gives a damn about Katy Perry, it’s Katy Perry’s breasts that have had the successful career.



Twilight

As noted previously I have never read the books or seen the movies. And I find people who are just a bit too obsessed by the whole thing really annoying.



Heidi & Spencer

He’s a tool, her body has more plastic than a Tupperware factory.


Hey Soul Sista/Train & I’m Yours/Jason Mraz

Every freakin’ time I’ve gotten in my truck the past several months and turned on the radio I have heard one or both of these songs. I sort of liked them at first, but that mild affection ended after about the 400th listening. Let’s move forward. Or maybe I will just listen to more talk radio.



Miley Cyrus

A role model she is not. I am not sure when it became mandated that all female singers & actresses had to be airheaded sluts to succeed, but if that’s the rule Miley is following it to the tee. And let’s be honest…she’s not a very talented actress or singer.


Lindsay Lohan

Is Lindsay still in rehab?? I don’t know and I don’t care. Lohan is the poster child for wasted potential. Unlike the average Hollywood tart this gal has skills. It was apparent from childhood that she had all the makings of a fantastic actress, one that might someday be thought of in the same vein as well respected performers like Meryl Streep, Jodie Foster, Holly Hunter, or Sally Field. Instead Lindsay has pissed away nearly all that potential.



And The Sammy goes to…..



Ladies and gentlemen, you are a witness to history. For the first time in the storied annals of awards shows we have a 13 way tie – they all win…or lose (depending on one’s perspective).



Moment of the Year



The Rescue of 33 Chilean Miners

I am born & bred in the great state of West Virginia and my grandfather lost a leg in the coal mines, so I am familiar with mining disasters. In August of 2010 a different sort of mine accident occurred in Chile. A cave in at a copper mine left 33 miners trapped underground but, thankfully, still alive and mostly unhurt. Rescuers quickly figured out that the men could be retrieved from their prison 2300 feet underground…but it would take months. Not hours, not days, not weeks…months. Suddenly hope turned to fear. However…miraculously…all 33 men were able to survive 69 days in a spot built for such situations. Rescuing the men took a lot of effort on the part of many many individuals from all walks of life, but on 10/13/10 all 33 men were safely retrieved from what could have been their graves. The story was an inspiring one of hope, faith, effort, and teamwork.



WV’s DaSean Butler & Coach Bob Huggins At The Final Four

It is likely that no one outside the state of West Virginia considered this much of a story. The West Virginia Mountaineer men’s basketball team won the Big East tournament and entered the NCAA Championship as a #2 seed, making it all the way to The Final Four. In the second half of the semifinal contest against Duke, Butler, the Mountaineers key player and leader in every way, went down with what looked like a very painful knee injury. As he lay on the court crying in agony Coach Bob Huggins, a man who has been much maligned for most of his career, went to his senior captain and cradled him in his arms, reassuring and comforting the fallen young man. It was a rare glimpse inside the heart of an otherwise tough as nails coach, and it was a moment that reinforced the reason many of us are sports fans.



Betty White’s Career Renaissance

Hollywood always has and always will cater to The Pretty People. Stars put their bodies through hell and have more elective surgery than anyone in their right minds should just to please a shallow industry and remain relevant and employed. Usually by the time a performer, especially a female, turns the corner past 50 she’s done. In 2010 Betty White went against the grain and was the exception to the rule, at the age of 88 having as big a year as anyone. It all started with a hilarious Snickers commercial during the Super Bowl, which for some reason spawned a viral campaign on Facebook to have the octogenarian host Saturday Night Live, which she finally did on May 8. That guest host spot even got her an Emmy nomination. White went on to do guest spots on sitcoms Community, The Middle, Hot in Cleveland, and 30 Rock. Betty White is proof that true talent overrides superficial indicators like age and breast size.



Phil Mickelson Wins The Masters

While the golf world was busy kvetching over Tiger Woods’ sex life Phil Mickelson offered a touching counterpoint. Both Phil’s wife Amy and his Mom had been battling cancer, and Phil had steadfastly stood by them. When Mickelson won his third Green Jacket in April and embraced his recovering wife on the 18th green one couldn’t help but think “Now THERE’S a role model”.



The 2010 Winter Olympics

Honestly I am giving a nod to the 21st Winter Olympiad more out of politeness than anything. Did it have some fun stuff going on?? Sure. The U.S./Canada battle for hockey gold was compelling, some of the ice skating was entertaining, and curling is always awesome. But really, if a Russian luger hadn’t been tragically killed then there would be virtually nothing memorable about these Olympics.



The Conservative Uprising

We’ve already covered the Tea Party movement and the results of November’s mid-term elections. Those two things combined with President Obama’s low approval numbers are all the proof anyone should need that this country leans right and that conservative values and principles are alive & well.



Zuckerberg Donates $100 Million To NJ Schools

Most wealthy people get a bad rap. They are perceived as selfish, haughty, and only concerned with money. However, back in September Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg, who is portrayed in a rather negative light in the movie The Social Network, donated a huge amount of money to the Newark, NJ school system for education reform. I am not privy to the details of what they are attempting to accomplish in Newark or how they are utilizing the funds, but that big of a chunk of change should have a significant impact. Zuckerberg wanted to make the donation anonymously but was coaxed into making it public by both the mayor of Newark and the Governor of New Jersey. And while it may be true that $100 million dollars is pocket change to a man reportedly worth over $7 billion it is equally as true that such a donation cannot be overlooked and must be respected and appreciated.



The Theatrical Release of Part 1 of the Final Harry Potter Film

In November the 7th installment of the highest grossing film series of all time, one that has made over $6 billion, was released. It is the first of two films that cover the last Harry Potter novel, The Deathly Hallows. Personally I have enjoyed the books far more than the movies, but the release of these final two films marks the conclusion of a 14 year love affair between an adoring public and its boy wizard. Both the books and the movies become darker and more sinister as they progress, and at some point the story really evolved from a childrens’ tale to something much more mature and literary.



3 Day, 11 Hour Wimbledon Match

I’m not a huge tennis fan, not at all. I will watch a match occasionally if I am really bored and if the circumstances are compelling for some reason. In the first round of tennis; crown jewel, Wimbledon, in June, such circumstances arose. American John Isner was pitted against Frenchman Nicolas Mahut, with Isner the favorite. The two men proceeded to engage in the longest match in the history of tennis. It was suspended twice due to darkness and played out over 3 days, equally over 11 hours of playing time. The two men broke all kinds of records, with Isner eventually coming out as the victor. By the time the third day rolled around the attention of the masses had been captured and even lukewarm fans like myself were mesmerized.



The New Orleans Saints Win The Super Bowl

Most people are familiar with what the city of New Orleans has had to endure since being hit with Hurricane Katrina in 2005. And while sports is a relatively unimportant cog in the societal machine it can provide a unique sense of inspiration, motivation, and validation. When the Saints defeated the Indianapolis Colts 31-17 on February 7, 2010 to hoist their first ever Lombardi Trophy, it was a triumph not just for the team, but for an entire city. It seemed to signify that New Orleans was indeed back. Super Bowl XLIV was watched by over 106 million people, making it not only the highest rated Super Bowl in its 44 year history but also the highest rated television program of any sort ever, besting the legendary 1983 farewell episode of MASH. Just a few months later New Orleans would be hit with disaster once again due to the aforementioned Gulf Oil Spill, but for one night its citizens were able to put all their troubles on the backburner and celebrate like only they can, and it was a pretty darn nice story for the rest of us too.



Glen Beck’s “Rally To Restore Honor”

Glen Beck seems to have surpassed Sean Hannity and even The Godfather of Talk Radio himself Rush Limbaugh as the conservative raging libs seem to despise the most. Admittedly Beck is a bit too histrionic for my tastes, but if one is able to put aside the theatrics and listen to what he says Glen Beck makes a lot of sense most of the time. On 8/28/10 ol’ Glen really peed in the Cheerios of a lot of his critics by holding a rally where he and guest speakers weren’t shy about emphasizing faith, character, values, and conservative principles as much needed things our nation needs to fall back on. Not coincidentally (no matter what Mr. Beck says) this shindig was held at The Lincoln Memorial on the 47th anniversary of Martin Luther King, Jr’s memorable “I Have A Dream” speech. It was bad enough Glen Beck was openly talking about God, but the fact that he was co-opting liberals’ self-righteous “we’re the only ones who give a damn about black people” vibe really had a lot of folks on the left foaming at the mouth. The event was attended by anywhere from 80k to over 1 million people, depending on what source one believes. I watched it on television and saw absolutely nothing that anyone of any political persuasion should have been offended by. The speeches were uplifting and invigorating, tribute was repeatedly paid to our military, and there was really not a lot of political rhetoric. It is sad that we have come to a point in history when openly talking about God raises the ire of a not insignificant portion of the populace. A few months later TV personalities Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert held their own event that basically mocked Beck and all things conservative, and it was predictably obnoxious, offensive, and sophomoric.



And The Sammy goes to…..



The Rescue of the Chilean Miners. The fact that all 33 survived the initial cave in was a miracle. Then to have them endure that long underground was a testament to the efforts of countless people and the spirit & fortitude of the men themselves. And on top of that what was an extremely delicate rescue went off without a hitch and no one sustained any injuries. I don’t know what is in store for the lives of these 33 individuals, but God was certainly in the midst of this situation and I pray that all involved appreciate the blessings bestowed upon them and do extraordinary things with the second chance they were given.





NFL lineman Gaines Adams…wrestling legends General Skandor Akbar, Angelo Poffo (father of Randy “Macho Man” Savage & Leapin’ Lanny Poffo), & Jack Brisco…Hall of Fame baseball manager Sparky Anderson…former Pirates pitcher Jimmy Bibby…NFL Hall of Famers George Blanda, Jack Tatum, and Don Meredith…former NBA standouts Manute Bol, Lorenzen Wright, and Melvin Turpin…pro wrestlers Trent Acid, Bastion Booger, Chris Kanyon, & Lance Cade…legendary Pittsburgh Pirates executive Joe L. Brown…Senator Robert C. Byrd…uber-producers David L. Wolper (Roots, The Thorn Birds, North & South, L.A. Confidential, Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory, 1984 Summer Olympics in Los Angeles) and Stephen J. Cannell (The A-Team, Riptide, The Rockford Files)…actresses Barbara Billingsley (Leave It to Beaver), Lynn Redgrave, Frances Reid (Days of Our Lives), Dixie Carter (Designing Women), Rue McClanahan (Golden Girls), Helen Wagner (As the World Turns), and Jill Clayburgh…actors Tom Bosley (Happy Days), Pernell Roberts (Trapper John, M.D.), Gary Coleman (Different Strokes), Tony Curtis, Kevin McCarthy, Steve Landesberg (Barney Miller), Andrew Koenig (Growing Pains), Robert Culp, Dennis Hopper, Leslie Nielsen, Corey Haim, Peter Graves, & John Forsythe (Charlie’s Angels, Dynasty)…musician and sausage king Jimmy Dean…musician Ronnie James Dio…directors Blake Edwards (The Pink Panther) and Irvin Kershner (The Empire Strikes Back)…Elizabeth Edwards…Penthouse founder Bob Guccione…former Secretary of State General Alexander Haig…voice of the Detroit Tigers Ernie Harwell…singers Teena Marie, Teddy Pendergrass, and Lena Horne…former Major Leaguers Jose Lima and Bobby Thompson (The Shot Heard ‘Round the World)…Art Linkletter…NBA legend Maurice Lucas…actor, NFL lineman, and commentator Merlin Olsen…authors Robert B. Parker Erich Segal, and JD Salinger…former Congressman Dan Rostenkowski…Olympic organizer Juan Antonio Samaranch…former NBA player and collegiate athletic director Fred Schaus…former head of NBC Sports, Commissioner of the USFL, and President of ESPN Chet Simmons…gym teacher and inspiration for southern rockers Lynyrd Skynyrd Leonard Skinner…NY Yankees owner George Steinbrenner…fabled college basketball coach John Wooden


Random Thoughts 20

No one can deny that if the big oil spill that has dominated the news lately would have occurred under the watch of the Bush Administration George W. would have been crucified in the media and probably threatened with impeachment. I continue to be amazed at the free pass Barack Hussein Obama gets from just about everyone. And let me take this opportunity to point out that a disaster like this is exactly why we should be drilling for oil in Alaska’s ANWR.

Although I was never a faithful viewer of iconic 80’s TV show The A-Team I am strangely looking forward to the upcoming big screen adaptation.

Lebron James and Kobe Bryant are talented basketball players, but can we cease putting them on the same pedestal as legends like Magic, Bird, & Jordan?? Give me a break.

I am a bookworm and love biographies. I have one basic rule though. If you’re life isn’t interesting enough to produce a book of atleast 300 pages then it isn’t worth my time to read.

What is the deal with the obsession to be tan?? And why are women under the delusion that they are even remotely attractive with an orange hue to their skin??

Congratulations to the voters in Pennsylvania who threw Senator Arlen Specter out on his keister. Politicians need to remember that they serve at the pleasure of the voters, and you cannot become so flippant as to switch parties just to save your own job.

I find it sad the number of people I run into well past their youth who still find it entertaining to “go out” and “get their drink on”.

Hardee’s is no longer serving roast beef. Interesting decision. I don’t care how much better “thickburgers” are than the run-of-the-mill burgers they served 10 years ago, the fact is that Hardee’s will never surpass McDonald’s, Burger King, and Wendy’s in that market, so why take away the one signature item on the menu that made the place stand out?? Oh well…thank God for Arby’s.

I am really tired of hearing about Sandra Bullock and her cheating husband Jesse James. Enough already.

Why does every photo album I see on Facebook have atleast one pic of someone doing that silly two fingered “gangsta” sign and another pic (usually of a female) doing some sort of over-the-top puckering thing?? It’s obnoxious. Stop it.

So now, in addition to The Food Network, we have something new on our television lineup called The Cooking Channel. I have no doubt I will quickly become addicted to it as well.

As a lifelong diehard football fan I am not completely opposed to a cold weather Super Bowl in New York, but I do hope it is something that’s not done often.

I was sucked into watching this season’s Dancing With the Stars because of my massive man crush on ESPN’s Erin Andrews. The final result was a huge disappointment, with Pussycat Doll Nicole Scherzinger taking home the Mirror Ball Trophy. Nicole is, for all intents & purposes, a professional dancer in her own right and should have never been allowed in the competition.

Whenever possible I like to use this public forum to give proper attention to the good news in the world. I want to give some love to something called The Innocence Project, a non-profit legal foundation that uses DNA testing to overturn convictions of wrongly accused people. I have read atleast 3 stories in the past few months about gentlemen being released from prison due to the efforts of this organization. It breaks my heart that anyone would spend decades being locked up for a crime they did not commit, but atleast now we have the technology to right these wrongs.

 

Random Thoughts 19

Congratulations to my West Virginia Mountaineers, who are headed to The Final Four after an improbable defeat of the mighty Kentucky Wildcats. And to all my Marshall peeps out there, please understand…I grew up in the shadow of WVU, less than an hour from Morgantown, and have been a loyal fan all my life. Just as some Mountaineer fans have delusions of grandeur, thinking the football team will ever be on the same level as USC, Ohio State, or Texas, so do many of my fellow Herd supporters have an irrational dislike for the Old Gold & Blue. To some degree I understand it, but on many levels I find it rather frustrating. There is a hierarchy in college sports, whether we like it or not…and sometimes we just need to understand our place in that pecking order and learn to embrace the rare occasions when our teams overachieve.

This is not the place to dive too deeply into the topic of nationalized health care, but suffice to say that I believe dark days are ahead for our nation. I just cannot fathom why otherwise intelligent people are unable to grasp how dangerous Barack Hussein Obama is or refuse to see how he is systematically tearing down our country.

Both Lost and 24 are ending in a few weeks. There hasn’t been this much grief in parents’ basements since the inventor of Dungeons & Dragons died two years ago.

I want to be very very clear about this: I am not being flippant, I am not joking. I am calling on ESPN to do the right thing and fire college basketball analyst Digger Phelps. The man is an embarrassment. He has no business doing prognostications on anything. Atleast Dick Vitale’s schtick is entertaining and he seems to be genuinely passionate about his job and the sport he loves. Digger is just smug, arrogant, and most of the time way way way off base on what he says. The man has ZERO credibility and as long as ESPN continues to give him a forum neither do they.

Changing of seasons, from cold to warm or vice versa, seems to really mess with my body. Two times a year…when summer segues into autumn and when winter makes way for spring…there is about a 3 week adjustment period when I just don’t feel right.

Speaking of my Marshall peeps – Ok, not really…but let’s talk about my adopted hometown and home of Marshall University, Huntington WV. The town is apparently The Unhealthiest City In America, and ABC has decided to use that for a reality show starring Food Network chef Jamie Oliver. As you may know, I dig The Food Network. I can’t say I have ever been a huge fan of Englishman Oliver, but he’s okay in my book…a little manic but atleast more genuine and less forced than Emeril Lagasse. Anyway, in his Food Revolution, Oliver is attempting to teach old dogs in Huntington new eating tricks. The show just premiered, so it’s way too early to really give it a thorough examination, but I am intrigued to see where things are headed. So far the usual West Virginia stereotypes have been avoided and the producers don’t seem to be going out of their way to reinforce that erroneous hillbilly image. The sad part is that the folks featured have not needed any help to make themselves look like uneducated assclowns. The lunch ladies at the elementary school are particularly grating. Pizza for breakfast?? I will admit that as a bachelor I have succumbed all too often to such bad choices, but it is embarrassing to think that our tax dollars are paying for an official government program that provides such a meal to children and no one in the chain seems to see anything wrong with the situation.

As a fan and as a rather cynical person who sincerely thinks it is always…always…about the money, I do not truly believe that Pittsburgh Steelers QB Ben Roethlisberger sexually assaulted anyone. However, it seems obvious that Ben is missing something in his life that money and fame aren’t providing, and he is trying to fill that void with booze, women, and a party boy lifestyle. Friends and family need to get ahold of Big Ben and get him to church. A personal relationship with Jesus Christ is the only way to get rid of the emptiness.

If atleast 50% of incumbents in House and Senate races are not defeated this November I will have absolutely no faith left in the American voting public.

Speaking of ESPN and Hussein Obama – I DON’T CARE what his March Madness bracket looks like!! SHUT UP!! For God’s sake when is the “mainstream” media in this country going to stop embarrassing themselves by constantly fellatiating this ghetto thug??

Movies should not be remade or “reimagined” for atleast 40 years after the original and even then only if the original has fallen out of vogue. For example, why were Halloween and…coming soon to a theater near you…A Nightmare On Elm Street, Red Dawn, Footloose, and The Karate Kid needlessly redone so soon??

Dammit!! Just when we were on the cusp of getting rid of Oprah (who, as some of you may know, I sincerely believe is an agent of Satan), there is word that freakin’ Rosie O’Donnell is coming back to television. We need to find the bastards who thought that was a good idea and beat them into unconsciousness.

 

Random Thoughts 18

Congratulations to the Super Bowl Champion New Orleans Saints. The game did not play out like most expected, as Indianapolis Colts’ quarterback Peyton Manning looked quite average instead of like one of the greatest field generals of all time. The victory is good for the beleaguered city of New Orleans and I sincerely hope many benefits are reaped.

The re-entry sequence near the end of Apollo 13 deserves to be ranked right up there with the baptism scene from The Godfather and the “Dad” scene at the end of Field of Dreams as among the greatest movies moments of all time.

I have come to a spiritual crossroads. My faith and belief in God and in my Savior Jesus Christ is still there, but my patience with superficial Christian clichés has run out. I no longer desire church to be a shallow social gathering. At the same time, I see no value in being a humorless Bible thumper who can’t loosen up and have fun…others too easily disregard that person as an uptight, unhappy killjoy. I am on a journey seeking an authentic & devout relationship and I am not sure it is available in the places one would normally assume it can be found. Something inside me has either broken or been awakened (I’m not sure which) in the past few months, and my BS meter when it comes to religion is on high alert.

Even as a diehard conservative I am not really sold on Sarah Palin as a legit Presidential candidate, but the outright vitriol aimed in her direction by histrionic shit stirrers on the left is puzzling. Palin and former President George W. Bush have their flaws for sure, but how some can so completely eviscerate them almost daily while at the same time putting Barack Hussein Obama on the largest pedestal mankind has ever known is completely beyond all logical comprehension.

I would like to nominate ESPN’s Skip Bayless as the worst sports journalist in history. His arrogant and condescending attitude is off the charts, and his opinions are so often dead wrong that he has become a joke. I recently saw him trying to justify the possibility of 13-11 North Carolina being chosen as an at-large team for the NCAA tournament. He was dead serious about the Tar Heels being selected merely due to their history and pedigree over lesser known teams with better records. Not only did the debate prove him to be a complete fool, but it highlighted what can be very wrong with collegiate athletics when so much credit is given to a reputation and a perception instead of actual performance. Call it The Notre Dame Fallacy.

Valentine’s Day has to be the worst holiday on the calendar.

I love it when people act like they understand something when in reality they have absolutely no clue. It really makes them look silly. Mark Twain famously said it is “better to keep your mouth shut and be thought a fool than to open it and remove all doubt”. More people should follow that advice. And yes, I see the irony in a guy who writes a VERY opinionated blog espousing that philosophy.

Can we please dispense with the term “pro-choice”?? People who are pro-choice only believe in a woman’s right to choose if she ultimately chooses to have an abortion.

Speaking of BS…..

I accepted long ago the fact that it is very possible that I may someday be one of those people who is dead for several days and whose body is only discovered because the neighbor’s begin to notice a stench. This is because at some point it became very clear to me that very few people legitimately give a damn whether I live or die, which does not in any way make me special or unique…..it’s just the way we human beings treat each other nowadays.  So armed with this awareness, I have very little patience for petulant, bratty adults who act like whiny children in a desperate attempt to have their ego validated. Encounters with so-called adults make me ever more determined to fade into the background in a concerted effort to not draw attention to myself.

I like Nascar and I’m not ashamed to admit it.

 

Random Thoughts 13

The funeral of Senator Ted Kennedy cost the city of Boston over $400k. Somehow that seems like a fitting tribute to his liberal tax & spend legacy.

I’ve just never been able to get into Canadian football…I don’t know why.

Is anyone really shocked that Iran is adding to their nuclear arsenal (besides The Obama Administration of course)??

Awhile back I wrote about my satisfaction with the current late night lineup. With all the pieces now finally in place, let’s take a quick look at the hits & misses. I’m not sure Conan has found his stride on The Tonight Show quite yet, but give him time…it took a few years for him to get into the proper comfort zone at 12:30, so the current situation isn’t a surprise. Leno at 10pm is okay. There are some kinks to work out, but if one found him funny on The Tonight Show he’s pretty much the same now. For those that find his humor too vanilla and crave the edgy stuff, you won’t like him any better earlier. Jay is built for comfort, not controversy. I honestly haven’t watched Letterman, Kimmel, or Ferguson all that much lately. Letterman turned me off with the whole Sarah Palin thing and it just left a bad taste in my mouth. Ferguson is occasionally a bit too…manic…and I have to be in the right mood. Kimmel hasn’t done anything wrong, but his odd timeslot and lack of promotion make him forgettable, which is unfortunate. The emerging star in my eyes is Jimmy Fallon. I know he annoys alot of people, mostly folks my Dad’s age or older. But I find him to be the best compromise amongst the group. He’s got Leno’s affability, Conan’s wackiness, some of Letterman’s subversive humor and is just edgy enough without coming across curmudgeonly and bitter like Dave. He connects with the audience and seems to genuinely be having fun, which is remiscent of Kimmel. If I owned Fox I’d throw a boatload of cash at Kimmel for an 11:30 show and then move heaven & earth to get Fallon at 12:30. It could be The Jimmy Late Night Connection.

So let me get this straight about the proposed government health care fiasco – If I choose not to buy it there is a $1900 fine, and if I don’t pay that I could get a year in jail?? When did I involuntarily move to Cuba or Russia??

Rachel’s Adult Night Club in Casselberry (FL) is giving out free flu shots to city residents.It is the sixth year in a row the club has held the promotion.Residents get free vaccines from 11:30 a.m. to 4 p.m. Tuesday and senior citizens get free lunch.Non-Casselberry residents can also get flu shots, but they’ll have to pay $30.” – Needles at a strip club…..now there’s a good idea…*lol*.

One of the biggest problems in our world today is incompetence. People don’t care enough to even head in the direction of excellence.

Filmmaker Michael Moore is an embarrasment and a moron. This isn’t a new revelation, just something I like to reiterate as often as possible.

It’s “supposedly”, not “supposibly”. That drives me nuts.

Gadhafi was allowed an audience with The U.N.?? Are you kidding me?? And Ahmadinejad?? It really is like the cantina scene from Star Wars.

I’m okay with Ellen Degeneres taking Paula Abdul’s spot as a judge on American Idol. She’s not a music industry insider, so she can kind of be the voice of the fans. Plus she’ll be just as amusing as Abdul but the humor will be intentional and ostensibly not pharmaceutically enhanced.

Recent legit terror threats leave no doubt as to the brilliance of former President Bush and the bumbling ineptitude of the current buffoon residing at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue. We’ve gotten complacent in the years after 9/11, but GW and a few others always realized how foolish it would be to let off the throttle.

I can’t believe there are still people in America who willingly pay $50+ for boxing pay-per-views.

Random Thoughts 12

I was always taught that if you don’t have anything nice to say then don’t say anything at all. So…..I am withholding comment on the happenings at Michigan involving football coach Rich Fraudriguez…..for now. Let’s see how it all shakes out. I will simply opine at this moment that an upset victory over an overhyped & overrated Notre Dame should not mean possible cheating gets conveniently overlooked.

The older I get the bigger fan I become of normal, solid names like  George, James, Joe, Vince, Paul, and Ike. Unusual and cute names are just irritating.

I refuse to buy baseball caps with Velcro closures.

President Hussein Obama seems hell bent on “convincing” the American public that we need socialized health care. Obama obviously misunderstands the concept of democracy and representative government, which is that we tell you what we want, you do NOT tell us what you want. We don’t care what you want. Your job is to represent the people who are, collectively, a whole lot smarter than you Mr. President. This health care debate needs to end right now, today. We’ve made our opinion perfectly clear…it is the job of those whom we elected to submit to the will of the people.

Congratulations to the Pittsburgh Pirates on your record setting 17th season with a losing record, meaning that you really do suck worse than anything has ever sucked before. Everyone associated with the organization must be so proud. I wonder if they had cake…maybe had t-shirts or other mementos made…maybe a special luncheon to mark their accomplishment??

I’d be interested in meeting the inventor of the funnel cake, the person whose idea it was to deep fry dough and top it with powdered sugar, all in an amoeba-like shape. Yum!!

I already had no use for Kanye West. First of all, he’s a “rapper”, a form of artistic expression for which I have absolutely no appreciation. And of course he’s the dude who said a few years ago that President Bush hated black people…..one of the most asinine  statements in the history of asinine statements. Now he’s gone and made an ass of himself once again by hijacking the MTV Video Awards, a harmless little pop culture fluff event. He stole country star Taylor Swift’s winning moment away by spouting some nonsense about how Beyonce should have won. I won’t claim to be a huge fan of either Swift or Beyonce, both of whom sell sexuality rather than musical ability…..but West’s actions prove just what a ghetto thug he really is (no wonder he’s such a fan of the current President), and if MTV had any cahonas whatsoever they’d not only ban him from their frivolous awards shows but ban him and his videos and anything else he’s involved in from their network for life.

I would like to suggest a new twist on sports prognostication. We’ve all see these guys on TV, in the newspapers, on websites, or on the radio who predict a large slate of games. The problem is that no one ever examines their results. I humbly propose that there should be consequences if it is proven that an “expert” is just a bag of hot air with no more expertise than you or me. Anyone predicting more than 2 games that are wrong with more than half of their guesses should be suspended for two weeks without pay.

Saturday Night Live is turning 35 this season. The cast is ever changing but one thing has remained the same for nearly all of SNL’s three decade run: producer Lorne Michaels…..which is probably why the show isn’t all that good anymore. One can’t expect a 65 year old man to still be in touch with what the 18-35 year old target demographic finds entertaining.