Points of Ponderation…..Episode 2.19

A semi-regular attempt to address some of life’s minutiae that might otherwise be overlooked…..

 

 

 

You may have heard about Operation Varsity Blues, the cheating scandal that’s been in the news lately in which dozens of well-to-do parents are charged with bribing ostensibly prestigious universities to admit their children. Two relatively prominent names associated with the situation are actresses Lori Loughlin (most famous for her role as Aunt Becky on Full House) & Felicity Huffman (formerly on Desperate Housewives & wife of more accomplished actor William H. Macy). I saw a post on Twitter about it and couldn’t help but be mildly bemused. The Tweeter opined that “I don’t understand why everyone’s so appalled with Lori Loughlin & Felicity Huffman. If my child was average at best and I had $$ to throw at a brand name college to give her that advantage in life, I absolutely would. So would 95% of parents. Sure it was shady but who cares?? Maybe redirect your moral compass towards more pressing world issues.” A few thoughts. First, I am constantly flummoxed by liberal hypocrisy. They hate “rich people”…unless they’re liberal actors/athletes/singers. This kind of rampant cheating, in which wealthy & influential individuals used their affluence to screw more deserving students out of an earned spot, should be prime soap box fodder for self-righteous libs. You can damn sure bet that if the culprits were well-known Republicans the liberal crusaders would be apoplectic, but because the two most notable names (thus far) are actresses from well-regarded TV shows it isn’t a “pressing world issue”. Secondly, the most amusing thing to come from all of this (thus far) is the fact that one of Loughlin’s daughters is the worst kind of Millenial stereotype…a vapid “Instagram influencer” (whatever the hell that is) who has admitted that she has zero interest in higher education outside of partying & football games. Yeah Mom & Dad…money well spent there lol. I am also blown away by the idea that anyone would spend hundreds of thousands of dollars to get their kid into any non-Ivy League college, because everyone one of a certain age knows that in the grand scheme of life it really doesn’t matter, and the youngsters involved in this thing don’t actually need a degree anyway, right?? If the family is that prosperous & well connected and the offspring are really pretty they’re all set…no need for a college degree, and it is certainly unnecessary to spend so much money or risk legal consequences. The whole thing is just stupid. But somehow…just as with the illegal immigration debate…those of us who believe in the rule of law & doing things the right way are the ones with a misguided “moral compass”. Uh-huh.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Everyone is familiar with the old axiom “you are what you eat”, but I think we can extend that logic further because there are much more influential things than food. Perhaps it would be more appropriately stated “you are what you consume”. What kind of books do you read?? What kind of movies & television programs do you watch?? What kind of music do you listen to?? What kinds of people do you associate with?? How do you spend your spare time?? No one is saying that watching the occasional silly movie or engaging in meaningless frivolity makes a person lazy or stupid, just as becoming knowledgeable about specific topics doesn’t mean that a person is wise, kind, or generous. However, in general think it is a good idea to understand how what we consume can impact…positively & negatively…our lives.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Speaking of intellectually vacant liberals…

There is a lot of chatter these days about Democrats pushing the ideas if a) eliminating the Electoral College, b) “packing” The Supreme Court with more than nine justices, & c) lowering the voting age to 16. Oh dear Lord…give me strength. Where shall I begin?? First of all, it is true that The Constitution does not specify the number of judges to be seated on The Supreme Court, and its size grew from six to ten at various times throughout the 19th century as the country expanded. However, since 1869 The Court has had nine justices. FDR attempted a “packing” maneuver in 1937, wanting the number of judges to grow to 15, but Congress shut him down (it all worked out okay for Roosevelt…he got his New Deal anyway). Isn’t it odd how nine justices has been just dandy for 150 years, but with The Court now leaning ever so slightly to the right & the very real possibility that a Republican President could have up to five more years to appoint another judge or two or three all the sudden Democrats think The Court needs to expand?? Secondly, the voting age was understandably lowered in the 1970’s from 21 to 18 because if folks were old enough to be drafted into military service then they should have the right to vote. However, a lot has changed in the ensuing years. For one thing, there is no draft anymore, so that logic isn’t applicable. My own personal opinion?? I would love to see the voting age raised back to 21…or maybe even 25. I don’t believe that young adults are…in general…nearly as mature or well-informed as they were fifty years ago. To be honest, I like the idea of passing a civics test as a requirement to earn the right to vote, but realize that’ll never fly so the best thing would be to keep the status quo. There is no way on God’s green Earth 16 year olds should ever be allowed to vote. I don’t even think they should be allowed to drive. I’d raise that age to 18 or 21 as well, but that’s a discussion for another day. And the big one…the Electoral College. This topic really gets me revved up. Unlike the size of The Supreme Court or a specific voting age, which aren’t detailed in The Constitution therefore opening windows for debate, the Electoral College is specifically written about. Why do Democrats despise The Constitution?? They’ve been hellbent on altering & eventually eliminating The Second Amendment for decades, and now, when a Presidential election doesn’t go their way they throw a temper tantrum. It’s like dealing with millions of apoplectic two year olds who haven’t had their naps. They need to get this thru their thick heads…the cultural elites in New York, Los Angeles, & Chicago do not speak for the rest of America. Just because you can pack a bunch of people into a few metropolitan areas doesn’t mean you make the rules. This isn’t grade school where a big mean kid can push around all the smaller children. I am reminded of a scene toward the end of Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith when Anakin Skywalker turns to The Dark Side and murders a group of younglings. The United States is not a democracy, it is a republic, which means that we have a Constitution that guarantees inalienable rights that cannot be taken away by the government & protects the minority from being abused by the majority.

More Questions & Answers

The unexamined life is not worth living – Socrates

 

It’s time once again to play everyone’s favorite blog based game…Getting to Know Your Humble Potentate of Profundity. We’ve gone down this road before, because I happen to have a job with stretches of downtime and I’m just nerdy enough to enjoy these kinds of exercises.

 

 

 

What social media post has really stuck with you??

Social media posts aren’t meant to stick with anyone. People skim across tweets or Facebook posts when they have nothing else better to do, and what they read is generally like cotton candy…entertaining for a brief moment before it melts away into the ether. Oh sure people occasionally attempt to be profound…even me. But it’s just a fun time waster.

 

If you had to be stuck at one age forever, what age would you choose??

I think I’d be a perpetual 19 year old college student. That was really a great time in my life.

 

What would be the worst animal to be eaten by??

Ever since watching Quint (Robert Shaw) be eaten alive by the shark in Jaws when I was a kid I’ve thought that’d be a pretty horrific way to go. I suppose being swallowed by a python might not be too much fun either.

 

On a scale of existential crisis to living the dream how’s life going??

somewhere in the middle

 

Besides religion & politics, what topic always gets heated in your circle of friends and acquaintances??

sports

 

What would you recommend to someone if they had the day off and didn’t know what to do??

Do what you enjoy. There’s nothing wrong with chilling out at home reading a book or watching movies, but if you are a more adventurous spirit by all means get out there and have some fun.

 

What do you imagine the lives of super rich people are like??

I can’t really imagine, and I don’t really care. I assume life in general is much easier for folks for whom money is not a problem.

 

Do you like your name? Would you ever change it??

Yes, I like my name. I have no plans to change it.

 

Do you prefer writing with black or blue pen??

I don’t have a preference.

 

Who is a mentor to you??

my father

 

Are you a restless sleeper??

Yes. I do better when I actually wear my CPAP machine though.

 

Would you ever want to be famous??

No thanks…I’ll pass.

 

What is your star sign??

Libra. I don’t really believe in all that astrology stuff, but I won’t deny that it can be sort of fascinating.

 

 

What do you collect??

Nothing really. I tried to get into baseball cards when I was a kid, but it was a passing fancy. I like eagles and have several sculptures & similar artwork in my apartment, but I wouldn’t go so far as to say that I collect eagles.

 

Do you like your cereal crunchy or soggy??

crunchy

 

What would you want your legacy to be??

I wrote about legacy a few years ago after my friend Robert passed away.

 

Do you like reading? What was the last thing you read??

I love to read, although I don’t seem to have the attention span now that I had when I was younger. I used to blow thru a 500 page book in a few days, but now I’ll have a half dozen books started concurrently and it takes me forever to actually finish. I recently read biographies about golfer Tiger Woods & comedian Robin Williams.

 

How do you show someone you love them??

There are a million ways to show someone you love them. It just depends on the person and the relationship.

 

Do you like ice in your drinks??

yes

 

What useless bit of information have you memorized and will probably never forget??

My head is filled with meaningless trivia that will probably only matter if I somehow end up as a contestant on Jeopardy.

 

Do you prefer swimming in pools or in the ocean??

I can’t swim, so it doesn’t really matter to me. I’ve never been to the ocean, but I will make it there someday. It seems like the ocean is atleast more interesting to look at than a swimming pool.

 

What quote has always stuck with you??

“A hammer shatters glass but forges steel. Adversity is like the hammer, and what it does to a person depends on what they’re made of”. I believe it is an old Russian proverb.

 

What would be the worst thing to have a phobia of??

I have had what I call a driving phobia (it is more likely a form of PTSD) that has been pretty awful for over twenty years. It has virtually ruined what was potentially an impactful & stimulating life.

 

Where do you feel the safest??

At home in my humble little apartment. It is a cocoon that I retreat into more & more with each passing day.

 

If you could travel back to any era, which would you choose??

I think it’d be fun to check out the 1950’s. I know it probably wasn’t as innocent & enjoyable as it is often portrayed, but if it was…I could handle hanging out at the drive-in, playing awesome tunes on a jukebox at the malt shop, & driving some of the coolest cars of all time.

 

What was the last movie that made you cry??

Marley & Me with Jennifer Aniston & Owen Wilson. It is allegedly a comedy, but anyone who has watched it until the end knows that it takes a very sad turn. I didn’t catch it in the theater, but when it came out on home video I ordered it on demand. I was at home watching it with my puppy Rocco, and I bawled like a freakin’ baby.

 

What game do you always lose??

Pretty much any game I play. Card games. Billiards. Video games. Words with Friends. I’m ultra-competitive & hate to lose…but I’m also not very skilled or lucky.

 

What is your favorite season? Why??

I like summer. I just feel happier, healthier, & more energetic when the sun is shining. Sunglasses, air conditioning, backyard BBQs, concerts in the park, fairs & festivals, fireworks. What’s not to love about summertime??

 

What do you know way too much about??

soap operas & professional wrestling

 

 

If it was decided that all countries would be abolished and the entire earth would be one unified political body, what would be the capital city of Earth? What would its flag and anthem be??

When that happens I don’t think it’ll matter much what the capital city is or what kind of flag or anthem we’ll have. A One World Government signifies The End, and the only thing that matters is Jesus.

 

What movie really encapsulates the era in which it was made??

Two films immediately come to mind. I think Saturday Night Fever really captures the late 70’s disco era, and Fast Times at Ridgemont High is quintessential 80’s.

 

What was a random compliment that someone gave you that really stuck in your memory??

A teacher in junior high school told me I should become a writer. I really should have followed her advice.

 

Have you ever seen a shooting star? Did you make a wish??

No. Maybe someday.

 

What do you regret the most??

Regrets?? I have a few…but, then again, too few to mention.

 

If you had to have a tattoo, what would it be and where would you get it??

I seriously considered getting a tattoo in college. Several of my fraternity brothers had our letters tattooed on their ankles and I thought about doing the same because a) that area is generally hidden or not all that noticeable in a professional situation, and b) I have no feeling below my knee so pain wouldn’t have been an issue. However, ultimately I talked myself out of it and now have absolutely no desire to get a tattoo.

 

Do you address older people by their first or last name??

It depends on how well I know them. There are elderly people in my church, my hometown, & my apartment building that I know well enough & feel comfortable using their first name. But with strangers or people I don’t know well I’m all about “sir’ or “ma’am” and “Mr.” or “Mrs.”.

 

Do you consider yourself a romantic??

Theoretically I believe I can be romantic, but I haven’t had much opportunity to practice so I might not be very good at it.

 

If money was not a factor, how would you live your life??

I don’t think I’d want to live anywhere else, but I would travel a lot more. And I would build a house that I designed. Other than that I wouldn’t want my life to drastically change.

 

Do you prefer baths or showers??

showers

 

 

Would you prefer to live in the country or the city??

I like living in a small town that’s not too far away from a big city. Right now I am about two hours away from Pittsburgh, but my life would be much more interesting if I lived only 15-30 minutes outside of the city. I have zero desire to actually live in the city.

 

Do you drink your tea or coffee with sugar??

I like my hot tea with sugar & some milk. I don’t put sugar in my coffee…just cream.

 

What is your favorite item of clothing??

There’s nothing better than a comfie pair of sweatpants & a ratty ol’ t-shirt that one would never wear out in public. And when I do go out & about I’m all about jeans & a nice polo or Henley shirt. I’m not trying to impress anybody.

 

Do you prefer reading paper or electronic books??

For the longest time I refused to even deal with the whole e-reader thing. But then my sister got me a tablet for Christmas a few years ago, so I downloaded the Amazon Kindle app and began using it occasionally. However, at the end of the day I’m still a traditionalist and prefer a good old-fashioned paper book.

 

What can you see outside your bedroom window??

Subway. Wendy’s. Long John Silver’s. Kroger.

 

What is the strangest thing you have eaten??

Eel. Shark. Escargot. I’m willing to try different things, but for the most part I prefer to stick with normal, average, basic stuff…meat, pasta, veggies, chocolate.

 

What are you most thankful for??

I’m thankful for many things…when I actually take time to reflect on my blessings. However, more often than not I “sweat the small stuff” and feel frustrated or angry about things that have gone awry in my life. Perhaps I give off negative vibes and strike others as petty & ungrateful. That’s the only reason I can come up with to explain my loneliness and why so many people tend to shun me nowadays…even friends who I thought I’d always be able to count on.

 

Do you like spicy food??

Not at all. I have whatever the opposite of a “cast iron stomach” would be called. Just thinking about spicy food might necessitate a trip to the bathroom.

 

Have you ever met someone famous??

A few. Former WV Governor & Senator Jay Rockefeller. Former First Lady Hillary Clinton. 80’s supergroup Kansas. TV’s Incredible Hulk Lou Ferrigno.

 

Do you keep a diary or journal??

I blog, which is a similar concept. And I do have a daily planner that I essentially use as a journal of my mundane little life.

 

Do you prefer to use pen or pencil??

Definitely a pen.

 

What’s something everyone should experience at least once in their life??

I think everyone should have the joy of owning a pet.

 

How would you spend your ideal day??

It depends on my mood. Generally I am a homebody, don’t enjoy crowds, & become easily annoyed by humanity. Therefore, oftentimes a perfect day is chillin’ with my boy Rocco, a good book, & some movies. However, I do occasionally venture out, so dinner & a movie, a ball game, a play, or a concert could be fun with the right company.

 

What are your most used emojis??

 

 

 

 

 

What really annoys you when other people do it, but you occasionally do it as well??

To be honest many things annoy me, but I do my best not to be hypocritical and do the very things that annoy me.

 

What movie quote(s) are you tired of hearing??

“Life is like a box of chocolates…”

And I LOVE Forrest Gump

 

What small thing makes you angrier than it should??

I could probably list multiple things, but one situation in particular has really been ticking me off lately. There are pages on Facebook dedicated to very specific things, like 80’s Music or 90’s TV. They are just harmless time wasters like what social media was intended to be. At any rate, someone will post a question like “Name a 70’s movie that didn’t get a sequel but should have”, and the thread will be chockful of responses naming films that either weren’t produced in that decade or did in fact have a sequel. I could understand one or two people misunderstanding the question, but when dozens of people post such wrong answers it becomes clear that things like reading comprehension & critical thinking are in short supply and it saddens me.

 

If you could show everyone in the world one image for 10 seconds but it couldn’t contain text, what image would you choose??

Jesus

 

 

Who is the funniest actor or actress still doing movies or TV shows??

There are quite a few actually…it just depends on what one likes. Off the top of my head I’m fond of Will Ferrell, Ben Stiller, Jack Black, Steve Carell, & Vince Vaughn. They may not be cool & hip anymore but Jerry Seinfeld, Billy Crystal, & Steve Martin still have “it”. Melissa McCarthy is funny in small doses.

 

If there were an Olympics for average people, what would some of the events be??

Angry Birds. Putt Putt Golf. Fishing. Pizza Eating. Air Hockey. Beer Chugging. HORSE. Checkers. Hunting. Bowling. Poker. Couponing. Mowing Grass.

 

Would you travel to a foreign country all by yourself??

Possibly. It wouldn’t be ideal because there is safety in numbers, and especially because I am in a wheelchair I know I can be viewed by evildoers as an easy target. However, depending on the circumstances I may be willing to take a chance.

 

Who would you want to play you in a movie about your life??

I actually began writing an outline for a screenplay based on wacky things that happened at a job I held about fifteen years ago. In my mind I always had Jack Black playing me.

 

What’s your best podcast recommendation??

I’ve never really gotten into podcasts. Perhaps I should investigate the options.

 

What would be the absolute best pet to have??

A dog. Specifically a pug. Like my Rocco. Of course I may be just a bit biased.

 

What’s a piece of advice that you wish everyone would take to heart??

It’s not necessarily advice, but I wish that everyone believed in God and His Son Jesus Christ. I’m not a good Christian and I am forthcoming about that. I am far too flawed and stubborn. I make too many mistakes & bad decisions, and I am far too moody. However, I atleast believe in the reality of God and the basic foundations of Christianity, which is a good jumping off point for improvement and getting to where I need to be. I have interacted with so many people who are scoffers, who consider God to be an imaginary fairy tale, who have absolutely no faith. They are so lost & misguided, and it’s a complete waste of time to even have a discussion with such individuals. I walk away feeling so many negative emotions.

 

What’s your most common first thought when you wake up??

I’m not sure I think too clearly for a few moments after I first wake up. I’m a slow starter that needs to ease into my day. I usually give some lovins’ to my boy Rocco, then I hop online or check my phone to see what’s going on in the world. Sometimes I need to listen to some music to help clear the cobwebs. Then it’s time to decide on a plan for the day. If I have somewhere I need to be or things I need to accomplish then I get up, get dressed, & get going. If I don’t have anything I need to do then maybe I’ll just chill out for awhile and enjoy the tranquility. Every day is slightly different, so I don’t think there is necessarily a common thought process.

 

What’s the most absurd thing that has become reality for you??

Same sex marriage & “gender fluidity”. Those things aren’t specifically reality for me, but they’ve become accepted norms in society, which blows my mind.

 

If you could be a mythical creature, which would you choose??

A hobbit!! I’d dig living a simple life in The Shire…smoking, eating six meals a day, being neighborly.

 

Do you think your childhood was better or worse than other people growing up in a similar place and time??

Definitely better. On a personal level I had my handicap & associated health issues to deal with. However, based on how great my family has always been and the idyllic small town life I had I realize how blessed I was and that so many kids had it far worse than me.

 

What’s your “back in my day, we…”??

I am amazed at how often school is called off these days for inclement weather. When I was a kid we’d get 6 or 8 inches of snow and they’d just slap some chains on the buses and go for it. Some folks lived up a holler or other places that the bus couldn’t get to, but those kids would just miss out and have to make up their work the next day. Nowadays it doesn’t even have to be snowing…sometimes the powers-that-be will call off school just because it’s cold lol.

 

What flavor combination is kind of weird but you really like it??

It’s not necessarily a flavor combo, and I don’t believe it’s all that weird, but allow me to offer a recommendation. I like to buy Country Time On the Go lemonade packets, but instead of putting it in a regular bottle of water I put it in seltzer water, which ends up essentially being carbonated lemonade. The fizz of the water & the tang of the lemon work really well together.

 

What fictional character did you / do you have the hots for??

When I was a kid I had a thing for Sandy (Olivia Newton-John’s character) in Grease. Now I understand why…it’s that intriguing combination of sweet & sexy, plus she could sing. Then, as a teenager, I had a crush on Alyssa Milano…specifically her character Samantha Micelli on Who’s the Boss?. In the 90’s I was all about Rachel Green (Jennifer Aniston) on Friends. When A Walk to Remember hit theaters in 2002 I was thirty years old and totally fell for Mandy Moore…affection that remains to this day.

 

 

 

 

 

What genetic modification would you most like to have??

Well…if I could be genetically modified into being able to walk that’d be nice.

 

What was something you loved but it never really took off or was ended before it’s time??

I’m a Pittsburgh Pirates fan, and that sounds like a description of most of their seasons the past two decades.

 

What habit would you most like to break? What habit would you most like to start?

I’ve always had an issue with procrastination, so that’d be a great habit to break. Along those same lines, I’d love to make better use of my time…spend a lot less time online & watching TV, write more, read more books, and really dig more into The Word of God.

 

How do you like to relax?

I enjoy a good movie. Sometimes I get in the mood to listen to music. I like to read, though not as much as I once did. Lately I’ve been playing Spades Plus on my phone & find it very soothing.

 

What did you want to be when you were younger?

I had planned to go to law school and eventually go into politics, but none of that ever happened and that’s just fine with me.

 

Who would you like to connect (or reconnect) with? Why?

A good friend of mine stopped calling a couple of years ago. When our only communication became snarky remarks he’d make about comments I’d made on social media I deleted him from my Facebook. I still don’t know why he stopped talking to me. We used to talk on the phone for hours two or three times per week, and I really miss those conversations.

 

If life stopped today, what would you regret not doing?

traveling…moving away from West Virginia…marriage & children

 

Imagine you’re in your 90s. What memories would you like to have? What stories do you want to tell?

When my paternal grandfather was near death I remember him being surrounded by his grandchildren. At some point I realized that I won’t have that big family if/when that moment arrives for me. He had decades of wonderful memories with family & friends. That doesn’t mean his life was perfect or without heartache, just that there was a lot of positive stuff to balance things out. How awesome is it to have that kind of life to be able to reflect on in your 90s??

 

What qualities do you admire in others?

honesty…faith…a good sense of humor…humility…intelligence

 

Pretend money is no object. What would you do?

I would absolutely travel more. At this point in my life home is home and I don’t see that changing, but there are a ton of places that would be fun to visit and events that’d I’d love to attend.

 

What practical skills do you wish you had?

I’d like to be a better cook & more mechanically inclined.

 

If you could have dinner with any 3 people (dead or alive), who would they be and why? 

I’m going to cheat and list four…my mother, my maternal grandmother (I never met my maternal grandfather), and my paternal grandparents. Oh how I miss all of them and what I wouldn’t do to have one more meal with them.

 

What is your favorite book/movie/song? Why?

I’ve written a lot about my favorite movies. When it comes to books & music there are so many things that I enjoy that it is nearly impossible to narrow it down.

 

What sorts of things make you laugh?

Puns. Silly videos of people being stupid. A good old-fashioned sitcom.  Dad jokes. Memes.

 

 

What piece of advice would you give to five year old you? Sixteen year old you? Twenty-one year old you? Right now?

Hmmm. To five year old Me I would say that life isn’t easy, but have faith because you’ve got a great family that will take good care of you. To 16 year old Me I would encourage continuing education as long as possible (Master’s, PhD) and try to map out a career path. To 21 year old me I would suggest wise financial decisions, offer a reminder to appreciate parents & grandparents because they won’t be around forever, advocate healthier eating habits, explore the idea of finding someone to settle down with, and really push moving out of the comfort zone of home & relocating somewhere. I’m not sure what advice I’d offer to Current Me. I understand the mistakes I make and various ways that I mess up my life, but in the moment it is difficult to change.

 

What was your favorite TV show while you were growing up? What are your favorite TV shows now?

We had some awesome TV shows when I was growing up…Dallas, Cheers, The Dukes of Hazzard. I could go on & on. Then when I was a young adult there was Friends, Seinfeld, & Frasier. Nowadays I love The Big Bang Theory, my ESPN talk shows, a couple of soap operas, & of course pro wrasslin’. I explored this topic when I wrote about my 50 Favorite TV Shows a few years ago.

 

Do you have any pet peeves?

Oh sure. Selfishness. People who comment on things without knowing what the heck they’re talking about. Anyone who can’t take a hint, doesn’t know when to leave, or continues inane babbling long after the conversation has become tedious. Being late.

 

What are your favorite movies?

I wrote a whole series about my 100 Favorite Movies a few years ago. I also did Merry Movie Mayhem, 80’s Movie Mania, & 90’s Film Frenzy. I love a lot of different movies.

 

What do you like to do on the weekend?

Unfortunately I work every weekend.

 

What are some of the items on your bucket list?

I did a bucket list of sorts several years ago…45 Things To Do Before 45, but that birthday has come & gone and I haven’t fulfilled very many of those things. At this point in my life I’ve concluded that it’s not smart to have unrealistic pipe dreams, so I try to stay within the realm of attainable goals. I’ve been wanting to visit Las Vegas for many years and think it’s doable…if I can ever talk a couple of my friends into joining me.

 

Have you found your calling? If so, what is it?

Some would opine that writing is my calling, and I’d be inclined to agree. However, I always assumed that one’s calling was a big deal that led to big & important things. Perhaps I am wrong.

 

If you could only listen to one song for the rest of your life, what would it be, and why?

I can’t imagine listening to only one song for the rest of my life. Even if one loves that particular song it would become irritating after awhile. I love music, but my taste is very eclectic and oftentimes dictated by my mood. Perhaps I’m feeling like jazz & blues today, tomorrow I’ll be into classic rock, and the next day I might want to listen to classical. Miles Davis. Billy Joel. Vivaldi. Hank Williams Jr. It’s all good for the most part. Why limit yourself to one song when there is so much greatness available??

 

Do you now – or have you ever – had any pets? If so, tell me more about them.

I have a ten year old pug named Rocco. I live in an apartment and originally we weren’t allowed to have pets, but that changed, with the stipulation that they not be over a certain size. That’s fine with me because I like smaller dogs, although I didn’t want a girlie dog like the kind that some women carry in their purse. I decided I liked pugs because they’re small & cute but still kind of tough looking. Back in the summer of 2008 I got an opportunity to adopt a puppy, and it’s one of the best decisions I’ve ever made. Rocco is my best lil buddy…the closest thing to a baby I’ll ever have. He can be stubborn sometimes, but usually he’s rather chill & low maintenance. He’s a great lapdog that is happy to lay around being lazy with his Daddy. He loves carrots, bananas, & the treats that my neighbor…Crazy Uncle Bernie…brings over to him. Rocco is getting a bit older now & has noticeably slowed down, which makes me kind of sad, although I am thankful for every single moment I’ve had with him.

 

If you were stuck on a deserted island and you could only bring one thing, what would it be and why?

My Bible. That’s just how I roll.

 

 

If you could only eat one food for the rest of your life, what would it be, and why? If you could only watch one TV show for the rest of your life, what would it be, and why? If you could only watch one movie for the rest of your life, what would it be, and why?

I feel the same way about these as I do about the “one song” concept, but I’ll be a good sport and play along. Food?? Chocolate (which leaves multiple possibilities available). Television show?? The Andy Griffith Show. More than a half century after original episodes ended the world still enjoys reruns. I watch an episode (or two or three) of TAGS on an almost daily basis, and it never gets old. One movie?? Wow…that’s really difficult. I am so…random…when it comes to movies. I love Christmas movies…at Christmastime. I love baseball movies like Field of Dreams & Bull Durham…in the summer. I really enjoy a good rom-com like When Harry Met Sally (preferably in the fall) or Sleepless in Seattle (winter). Occasionally I will watch the entire Back to the Future trilogy back-to-back-to-back, although my shortening attention span has made that less appealing in recent years. So okay…I guess I am going to wuss out again. I just don’t think I can choose only one movie.

 

What is your favorite cartoon?

I wrote about my favorite cartoons a few years ago.

 

Who is your favorite music artist? What is your favorite music genre?

I enjoy most music genres except country, and even some of that is okay occasionally. I’d probably lean toward classic rock as my favorite, with The Eagles, Van Halen, Lynyrd Skynyrd, Journey, & REO Speedwagon among my preferred performers.

 

What would you do if you won a million dollars?

I suppose I’d spend a little, donate a bit to charity, invest a big chunk of it, and put some away for a rainy day. My father has always opined that one could not live like a millionaire on a million dollars. It’d be easy to burn thru every penny in no time at all, so I assume my lifestyle wouldn’t change all that much except for finally being able to afford a couple of nice vacations and being able to save & invest a few dollars.

 

What is your favorite color?

blue & purple

 

What would be your dream vacation?

Vegas Baby!! Vegas!!!!

I also wouldn’t complain about a trip to Italy.

 

If you could have one superpower, what would it be?

invisibility

Where did you grow up?

A lil blip on the radar called Mount Clare, WV, which is just outside a slightly bigger blip called Clarksburg. I always just tell folks it’s about two hours south of Pittsburgh, PA.

 

What are some small pleasures that make you way happier than they should??

Once upon a time I wrote specifically about that very subject.

 

What’s your favorite book? Who’s your favorite author?

Unlike favorite movies & TV shows I have resisted the urge to write about my favorite books. My tastes are very eclectic and I try to remain open-minded. I love a good biography. I’ve been a Sherlock Holmes fan since grade school. Ray Bradbury, Mark Twain, Charles Dickens are some of my favorite authors.

 

What is your favorite drink?

milk, iced tea, Pepsi

I’m not much into alcoholic drinks nowadays, but I enjoy a good mojito on occasion.

 

What’s your favorite TV game show?

Jeopardy!

 

What’s the dumbest rule you’ve been forced to follow??

I like my job, but there’s a lot of downtime and it gets boring sometimes. However, despite having a computer right in front of me I am not permitted to get online & surf The Net. I completely understand that certain sites (you know what I mean ;-)) shouldn’t be permitted, but to not be allowed to be online at all is silly. I think it should be okay as long as I do my job.

 

Do you like to cook?

I wish I did. I love watching The Food Network and seeing other people create tasty dishes, but if I’m being honest I mostly take the easy way out and either eat simple food at home like sandwiches, cereal, or something I can microwave, or I eat out somewhere.

 

What rules do you make for yourself??

I live by myself so I can pretty much do as I please as long as I pay my bills & take care of Rocco. I eat what I want when I want, I go to sleep & get up when I want, & go where I want to when I want to. Having said that, I have had an issue with being able to say “no”, and realize that I am perceived by many as a “nice guy”, aka a soft touch. Therefore, I have had to learn to set boundaries & walk away if I feel like people are taking advantage of me.

 

What’s the single most important thing you have done in your life??

ask my Lord & Savior Jesus Christ into my heart to cleanse me of all my sins

 

 

 

 

 

 

Winning & Musing…Volume 2.19

Hold on Lil Troopers…spring isn’t too far away!! Oh I suppose we may get hammered with snow a few more times because March is always a wildcard, but when McDonald’s is already serving shamrock shakes, NASCAR is back on the track, and baseball is part of the sports discussion we know the light at the end of the tunnel will be shining soon. Thankfully there is always more than enough sports news to discuss, although I’m not sure how much of it is all that pleasant at the moment.

 

 

 

 

 

Spring training is in full swing, but let’s not overlook what MLB has done off the field. It was recently announced that they will no longer use the term “disabled list” in regard to injured players. The change was made at the suggestion of advocacy groups for the disabled “out of concern that the term disabled for injured players falsely conflates disabilities with injuries and an inability to participate in sports”. As a disabled (handicapped, crippled, differently abled, handicapable…choose whatever buzzword you believe won’t offend anyone) individual who has spent my entire 46 years on this planet using a wheelchair allow me to opine that this is absolutely one of the dumbest instances of idiotic virtue signaling I have ever seen. No one with an ounce of common sense or capable of critical thought has ever confused baseball’s disabled list with those of us living our lives with a disability, and anyone offended by the term “disabled list” is a complete moron that should never be allowed to breed or even interact with the public. Also, as a person with a disability, it ticks me off that this is the sort of thing that “advocacy groups” are spending their resources on. Any such organization should be defunded immediately.

 

 

I come not to praise New England Patriots owner Robert Kraft, but neither do I seek to bury him. If you’ve been paying any attention at all the past few days you know that Kraft is in some hot water for getting his jollies at a “massage parlor” in Florida, an establishment that got caught up in a big prostitution ring. I am not condoning the activity or Kraft’s involvement in it, and y’all know that I’ve despised the Patriots for the past two decades. Having said that, it must be noted that 77 year old Kraft lost his wife of almost fifty years awhile back. Myrna Kraft died of ovarian cancer at the age of 68 in 2011. Certainly that is no excuse to engage in illegal activity, but it does suggest a man that is lost & lonely despite his immense wealth & success, and I am willing to have some measure of sympathy in that regard. Loneliness & grief are awful things and can steer people in directions they wouldn’t otherwise go. What I cannot understand is why a billionaire with some level of prominence would decide to…seek pleasure…at what the media is describing as a rather trashy & foul (not to mention public) establishment. One would assume that Kraft has the means to obtain anything he’d want in complete privacy, so it is a bit perplexing to think that he would unnecessarily put himself in harm’s way (on multiple levels). Obviously the NFL will get their pound of flesh (pun unavoidable). The league’s personal conduct policy applies to owners & coaches as much as it does players, and about five years ago Indianapolis Colts’ owner Jim Irsay was fined $500k and suspended from running the team for six games after being arrested for DUI & drug possession. I’m not sure what exactly a typical owner of a professional sports franchise does on a daily basis that effects operations, and a half million dollars is pocket change to them, so that “punishment” seems rather hollow, but I assume Kraft will receive a similar penalty. I’m sure the legal consequences won’t amount to much either, but the damage to his reputation is immeasurable and probably irreparable.

 

 

I am at a loss to explain just what has happened to the West Virginia Mountaineers basketball team. After making it to the Sweet Sixteen during March Madness three out of the past four years the ‘Eers won’t be making the NCAA, NIT, CBI, or any other post season tournaments in 2019. Injuries, dismissals, and just about every other calamity one might conjure has imploded their season to the point that a winning record is mathematically impossible unless they go on an incredible run in the Big 12 conference tournament. WVU has been the runner-up in that tournament the past three years and needs another similar finish to keep on playing. I normally try to remain optimistic, but will confidently predict right now that that isn’t going to happen. Head coach Bob Huggins has built up a lot of goodwill over the years as a hometown guy, alumnus, successful coach, and leader of winning teams in Morgantown, but trust me…he needs to figure out what went wrong and fix it, because all the benevolence shown him will turn sour real quick if next season is another disaster.

 

 

Have y’all checked out the Alliance of American Football?? I have to be honest…I watched part of one of the first games a few weeks ago, and haven’t given the league a second thought since. Part of the issue is completely mine…I work on weekends so I’m gone all day and in bed pretty early at night. However, I think there’s a bigger obstacle than just me for The Alliance. The AAF has eight teams… Atlanta Legends, Birmingham Iron, Memphis Express, & Orlando Apollos in the East, and Arizona Hotshots, Salt Lake Stallions, San Antonio Commanders, & San Diego Fleet in the West. Known entities like Steve Spurrier, Mike Singletary, & Mike Martz are head coaches. The initial games I watched were on CBS, but after that the NFL Network & CBS Sports Network took over, and that’s a bit of a problem since those are channels that I don’t typically “surf”…I have to specifically be seeking something out, and I’m just not there yet with The Alliance. On the field the games themselves aren’t anything too wacky. Unlike some other fringe football leagues that have come & gone in the past the AAF isn’t trying to reinvent the wheel or compete with the NFL, but there are a few differences. There are no kickoffs, which I don’t like but realize that it’s a concept that’ll be embraced by college football & the NFL sooner or later. Neither are there extra points. Somewhere Skip Bayless is squealing with glee about the new league’s marginalization of kickers. Defenses are somewhat limited as far as what they can do, so if you like swarming defense with a lot if blitzes the AAF might not be your cup of tea. Overtime has each team start on their opponent’s 10 yard line, which is even goofier that the college OT rules. There is only one overtime, so the game can end in a tie (no field goals!!). The revelation that has hit me about the AAF is that…atleast for me…as The Bible says, “to everything there is a season”, and as big of a football fan as I am I’m ready to move on after the Super Bowl. It’s February, which means that emotionally & psychologically football is in hibernation for me and I’m ready to move on to golf, NASCAR, basketball, & baseball. This realization surprised me a little bit, because I had thought it’d be great to have more football, but I just can’t become invested. I’m guessing that my perspective isn’t unique, which probably spells doom for The Alliance after another season or two, but hey…they tried.

 

 

If you think MLB is silly…well, one minor league team has surpassed that stupidity. The Hartford Yard Goats, a Double A affiliate of the Colorado Rockies in the Eastern League, recently made the decision to ban peanuts & Cracker Jacks altogether in deference to those with a nut allergy. But wait…there’s more!! Not only is their stadium now peanut free, but management has decided to change the lyrics to Take Me Out to the Ballgame, which of course contains the line “buy me some peanuts & Cracker Jacks”. Oh my…where to begin. These kinds of people absolutely exhaust every ounce of patience I possess and are a contributing factor to me adopting a reclusive lifestyle. First of all, about 2% of the population has a peanut allergy. The Yard Goats play their home games at Dunkin’ Donuts Park, which has a capacity of about 6200. So at a home game there MIGHT be about 125 people in attendance with a nut allergy. But instead of simply designating a section of the ballpark for those fans the geniuses that run the team instead chose to deprive over 6000 others of the opportunity to buy a snack that has been closely associated with baseball for decades. This is what is wrong with society. It used to be that the majority ruled, but nowadays we go out of our way to kowtow to the vocal minority & every fringe group that decides to whine about something. Look, I am not unsympathetic to folks with a nut allergy. No one is suggesting that they shouldn’t attend games, and I don’t think there is anything wrong with reasonable accommodations to make their experience as pleasant as it should be.  However, I just do not understand why a nut free section wasn’t enough of a compromise. This whole thing reeks of virtue signaling & grandstanding at its worst. And I haven’t even gotten to the song!! Take Me Out to the Ballgame was written in 1908 and has been a standard at ballparks for decades, oftentimes sung by the crowd during the “seventh inning stretch” (most famously at Wrigley Field during Chicago Cubs games). So because the food mentioned in the song has been banned at this particular ballpark they feel it is necessary to alter the lyrics too?? ASININE!!!! Every executive employed by the team should be fired immediately and NEVER be allowed to work in sports management EVER again. I’d be embarrassed to be a fan of the team, play for the team, or even live in freakin’ Hartford, CT. Hell, if I lived in Hartford I might sell my house and move, citing the stupid Hartford Yard Goats as the reason for my departure. I hope they lose every single game until the business implodes & the team folds. Perhaps a competing club will be created and they can call them the New Haven Nut Lovers or the Fairfield Cracker Jacks.

90’s Film Frenzy: A Fatal Four Way Finale

Seven months ago we started our journey with 100 movies that defined the decade of the 1990’s. And while trilogies (Toy Story, Austin Powers, Scream) & Christmas films (Home Alone, The Santa Clause, The Ref) weren’t included, we still ended up with a rather eclectic & competitive field representing a decade that is difficult to pigeonhole.

It is tempting to define the 90’s with grunge, flannel, boy bands, hacky sack, baggy jeans, gangsta rap, & the rise of The Internet, which wouldn’t necessarily be inaccurate. However, when it comes to movies I don’t think any of that translated well…atleast to anything noteworthy. When thinking about the 1990’s on film it seems as though there were solid contributions across all genres, with the defining characteristic being a general lack of defining characteristics. Whereas 80’s kids look back with fondness at some of the flicks we enjoyed growing up partly because of their singular music, kitschy style, & overall cheesiness, I don’t feel like 90’s films have that kind of unique vibe. Society seemingly turned down a dark & more violent path in the 90’s, which is certainly reflected in movies as much as anything else, but since I don’t tend to gravitate toward such morose entertainment it isn’t a big thing for me. I suppose it is fair to say technology played an increased role in 90’s movies, especially with improvements in special effects & animation. It is kind of fun & interesting to watch some 90’s films and chuckle at their depiction of The Internet, marvel at the size of cell phones, & realize how much social media would have altered the plot, but it’s not really a dominating theme.

The good thing about this lack distinction is that, instead of stories defined by their style, we were offered plenty of enjoyable movies with enough substance to give them staying power, and y’all know that’s a big deal to me. Do you realize that films made in the 90’s are now as old as films produced in the 1960’s would have been in the 90’s?? When considered thru that prism the sheer number of impactful movies made in the 1990’s that are still being viewed with some regularity three decades later is quite remarkable. Whether you prefer comedy or drama, are into horror or action, hold a special place in your heart for animation or holiday classics…the 1990’s had plenty of solid choices.

As far as this competition goes, just like 80’s Movie Mania I have tried to be fair in my analysis & conclusions, but obviously personal bias can’t be completely eliminated. I’m fine with that though, because at the end of the day favorite movies are always a matter of individual taste. We can cite box office numbers, award nominations & victories, and critical reviews ‘til the cows come home. All of those things are valid criteria for scrutiny, but the truth is that sometimes they matter and sometimes they don’t. Having said all that, my hope is that most won’t have too much of an issue with my conclusions. Enjoy.

 

 

 

 

The Contenders

 

Mrs. Doubtfire             

Of the Final Four contestants Mrs. Doubtfire is probably the one that most represents a 90’s vibe, with a story centered around divorce & child custody. It’s a tough gig to turn such topics into comedy, but with Robin Williams anything was possible. He stars as Daniel Hillard, a fun-loving voice actor whose charm has worn thin with his career-driven wife Miranda, played by Sally Field. When the final straw breaks the camel’s back of their marriage Daniel is inspired to interview for the nanny position that Miranda has advertised, but obviously can’t do it as himself. The solution?? Don heavy make-up, a wig, panty hose, & a dress and transform into Euphegenia Doubtfire, an elderly British lady any mother would want to babysit their children. Adding to the hijinks is Miranda’s flirtation with a former beau, fueling Daniel’s envy. It’s not so much that he wants to rekindle the marital flame as much as he doesn’t like another man so smoothly stepping into a paternal role. At any rate, the premise allows Williams to dip into his arsenal of comedic tricks, and the result is a super family friendly dramedy that doesn’t sidestep real life issues or give into the temptation for an idealistic & sentimental ending, but mostly focuses on humor.

 

 

Groundhog Day

A good friend opined a long time ago that time travel is cool, which is why almost any book, movie, or TV show containing it is enjoyable. But what about a time warp in which a man lives the same day over & over & over & over…(well, you get the point)?? Bill Murray stars as Phil Connors, a grumpy Pittsburgh meteorologist who makes the 90 minute trek up to Punxsutawney on February 2 to cover the annual festivities. Travelling with him are smartass cameraman Larry (portrayed by 80’s funnyman Chris Elliott) & lovely producer Rita (Andi MacDowell, at the apex of her career…a few years after Sex, Lies, & Videotape and a year before Four Weddings & A Funeral). Phil is a malcontent who hates reporting on Groundhog Day and doesn’t seem too happy about anything else. When a snowstorm forces Phil, Rita, & Larry to spend the night in Punxsutawney the weatherman isn’t pleased, and that mood doesn’t improve when he wakes up the next morning to find its Groundhog Day again!! You may recall learning about the five stages of grief at some point in school…denial, anger, bargaining, depression, & acceptance. Phil goes thru similar stages while stuck in the endless loop. At first he is confused. Then he uses his circumstance (and the idea that there are no consequences for his actions) to engage in drunken debauchery. He then becomes depressed and commits suicide multiple times to no avail. After killing himself and the infamous groundhog but still waking up in the time loop Phil decides to use his situation to better himself, learning things like ice sculpting, piano, & French poetry. He then begins being generous & helpful to others and also falls in love with Rita, utilizing the time loop to learn everything about her and become the kind of man she wants in her life. It is her love that ultimately seems to end Phil’s nightmare, although it is never explained what caused the time loop in the first place, how long it lasts, or exactly why it stops. The entire film is an existential enigma disguised as an ordinary comedy.

 

Forrest Gump

Accepted at face value Forrest Gump is simply the life story of “a local idiot” who has some improbable adventures and always gravitates back toward the girl he’s loved since childhood…but is that all it is?? Tom Hanks won his second consecutive Academy Award for Best Actor for his portrayal of Gump, a low IQ child in 1950’s Alabama who grows up to win the Medal of Honor for heroism in Vietnam, become an All-American football player for Bear Bryant’s Crimson Tide, & make millions of dollars as a  shrimping magnate. His childhood friend Jenny takes a different path. Abused as a young girl by her father, she becomes a promiscuous hippie, does drugs, & ends up as a single mother ill with “some kind of virus” (likely AIDS or hepatitis). Along the way Forrest & Jenny drift in & out of each other’s lives, ultimately ending up married & raising their young son together before Jenny dies. Forrest Gump is mostly a drama, but I love the fact that there are moments of levity. And what a soundtrack!! You’ve got music from Elvis Presley, Creedence Clearwater Revival, Aretha Franklin, Lynyrd Skynyrd, Three Dog Night, The Byrds, The Beach Boys, Jimi Hendrix, The Doors, The Mamas & the Papas, The Doobie Brothers, Simon & Garfunkel, Bob Seger…anyone who enjoys classic rock will dig the tunes in Forrest Gump. As far as deep analysis goes, there are some that look at the film as an allegory of two Americas, with Forrest representing small town conservatism and Jenny embodying the anti-war, free love, drug-induced counterculture that rose to prominence in the 60’s. There is plenty of symbolism, philosophical ponderings about fate & destiny, and maybe even some religious or atleast spiritual subtext. If one would rather just enjoy the pleasure of Forrest Gump as a great story, that’ll work and you won’t be disappointed, but the underlying themes are there and serve as food for thought.

 

Titanic                          

I don’t remember exactly when I became fascinated by the infamous Titanic disaster, but I know it was long before 1997.  There had been other books, movies, & documentaries about the tragedy, but this film took the public’s level of interest to a whole new stratosphere and created an entire cottage industry out of a voyage that lasted less than a week a century ago. Kate Winslet & Leonardo DiCaprio earned lifelong fame portraying Rose & Jack, a pair of star crossed lovers whose brief romance is cut short by an iceberg. Rose Dewitt Bewkater is a high society debutante being forced into marriage with arrogant steel tycoon Cal Hockley, while Jack Dawson is third class steerage passenger who won his ticket in a poker game. Think of it as a slightly modernized twist on Romeo & Juliet. The first part of the movie introduces us to the pair, whose initial encounter takes place when Jack talks Rose out of jumping into the ocean…ironic when one considers what is to come. Of course we know that Titanic was a real ship that actually sank, so eventually those events take center stage, the situation having been personalized by our affection for Jack & Rose. There is also a framing device, as the beginning of the film presents a modern day expedition to the bottom of the sea, with a treasure hunter seeking The Heart of the Ocean, a huge heart-shaped diamond given to Rose by Cal. The treasure hunter is contacted by a still living Rose, who is over 100 years old, and she relays the events of her memory to him & his team. Real life Titanic passengers & crew  like “Unsinkable” Molly Brown, ship builder Thomas Andrews, White Star managing director J. Bruce Ismay, Captain Edward Smith, business moguls John Jacob Astor IV & Benjamin Guggenheim, and elderly couple Isidor & Ida Strauss, are depicted, and one of the few complaints that I’ve heard about Titanic over the years is the fact that the stories of such historical figures take a back seat to the fictional love story of Jack & Rose, but personally I don’t have an issue with the creative choices of the filmmakers…it is a movie, not a documentary, and since it set records at the box office & during awards season I assume very few others saw a problem.

 

 

 **************************************************************

 

 

Elimination 1

Mrs. Doubtfire

Robin Williams was a legend, and Mrs. Doubtfire is undoubtedly one of his best movies, but at the end of the day it is just a solid comedy elevated by the performance of its star. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that, but at this point I have to pick nits and I cannot in good conscience promote it as an elite film.

 

 

Elimination 2

Titanic

Surprise!! You assumed it was going to win, didn’t you?? To be honest I might have had the same notion not that long ago. Critically acclaimed, record setting, award winning…Titanic is the total package. However, as I was pondering these final four films something hit me like a ton of bricks. Historical dramas, as these kinds of movies are known, are a double-edged sword. The notoriety of the event itself is obviously what leads to a film being made, and certainly it helps get curious moviegoers into the theater. But on the flip side the movie will always be compared to the actual situation, and in this case I think the tragic sinking of the RMS Titanic is such a fascinating story that Titanic feels merely satisfactory, perhaps even unnecessary. In retrospect the significance of the movie is that it renewed interest in the historic event.

 

 

The Runner Up

Groundhog Day

This breaks my heart. I adore Groundhog Day. Like a fine wine it has grown more deliciously elegant with age. To be honest I didn’t even watch it until years after its initial release. In February 1993 I was in the second semester of my junior year of college, spending most of my time drinking beer, hanging out with my fraternity brothers, and occasionally studying. I am actually glad that I didn’t see Groundhog Day back then, as I undoubtedly would have shrugged it off as the average comedy film that so many believe it to be instead of the metaphysical mediation of life that it actually is. Thru the prism of adulthood I am able to truly appreciate all that the movie has to offer. Though it isn’t winning this competition Groundhog Day is like the 12th seed during March Madness that goes on a run and finds itself head-to-head with the bluebloods, or an NFL team that has finished 8-8 for so many years that no one has any expectations then suddenly becomes a Super Bowl contender.

 

 

and finally…….

 

 

 

90’s Film Frenzy Champion

 

Forrest Gump

Tom Hanks starred in about a dozen significant films during the 1990’s, so I suppose it comes as no surprise that one of his works would win this competition. Something that I have consistently stated in our many discussions about movies in this space over the years is that a key benchmark for me is repeat viewings, and the idea of whether or not I am happy/excited when channel surfing and see that a particular movie is on TV. It is one thing to head to the local cineplex and be entertained for a couple of hours by the latest action flick, rom-com, slasher film, Christmas movie, sports drama, murder mystery, biopic, superhero adventure, sci-fi fantasy, or gross-out comedy, but it is entirely different when you are glad to watch the same story for the hundredth time decades later while vegging out at home. Not only does Forrest Gump check all the requisite boxes…made a ton of money, won a bunch of awards, killer soundtrack, received great reviews, eminently quotable…but I am still delighted to watch it whenever it is on, which is surprisingly often for a movie that hit theaters 25 years ago.  My father shares my love of Forrest Gump, which is a source of amusement for me since Dad & I rarely have a similar pop culture palate. I understand that there are a fair number of cynics who despise the movie for one reason or another, but I believe those folks are either overanalyzing or simply disagree with its perspective. To each their own.  My adoration has endured for over two decades and I don’t see that changing anytime soon.

90’s Film Frenzy: The Elite Eight

It was at this point just over a year ago, as Merry Movie Mayhem was drawing to a conclusion, that I took the easy path and  let the final eight combatants bow out with what was essentially a collective tie. I don’t feel bad about that because Christmas movies are just so special that I am fine with not following thru with a fight to the death. I don’t have the same kind of sentimental attachment to the 1990’s, so today we move forward with the division finals, aka The Elite 8. Enjoy.

 

 

 

 

 

Titanic                vs.              Sleepless in Seattle

After receiving a first round bye Titanic has gotten past Saving Private Ryan, Father of the Bride II, & The Birdcage. Sleepless in Seattle also received a first round bye then overcame challenges from Galaxy Quest, Dumb & Dumber, and My Cousin Vinny. I knew this moment would eventually come, and sadly it has arrived. During 80’s Movie Mania I eliminated National Lampoon’s Vacation in The Final Four because the ending makes it feel outdated. As I mentioned back then, the debate is whether that should be a mark against the film or celebrated as something that marks the era we are commemorating. Obviously I decided the former rather than the latter, and we are faced with a similar situation now. I adore Sleepless in Seattle, but the fact is that it feels dated because the invention of The Internet has made much of the premise irrelevant. The same story simply couldn’t be told nowadays. Conversely, Titanic has the advantage of being an historical drama. The story is what it is and it is…with all due respect to the unfortunate victims of the tragedy…frozen in time. The movie doesn’t feel outdated two decades later, and it won’t be two decades from now. One also cannot overlook the fact that it remains the second highest grossing film of all time and is one of only three films (the others being Ben-Hur and The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King) to win eleven Academy Awards. It has pretty good scores on Rotten Tomatoes too…89% from critics & 69% from the public, meaning that it is the rare movie that is actually good and popular. Though a film about a disaster that occurred in 1912 can’t really represent the decade of the 90’s I do feel like it is a signature piece of the cinematic experience of the 90’s.

 

      The Verdict:       

 

 

 

 

You’ve Got Mail                    vs.              Groundhog Day

You’ve Got Mail received a first round bye then defeated The Firm, Aladdin, & Good Will Hunting to make it to this point. After a first round bye Groundhog Day has gotten this far by overcoming Clueless, American Pie, & Apollo 13. The bottom line for me is originality. I have said for many years that I am secure enough in my smoldering machismo to admit that I enjoy a good rom-com, and You’ve Got Mail is a good rom-com. However, having said that, the thing about rom-coms is that they all share similar structural DNA. And why not?? The blueprint works, right?? But also, of the three films that Tom Hanks & Meg Ryan did together I think You’ve Got Mail might be the weakest…or atleast the most formulaic. Both Sleepless in Seattle and Joe Versus the Volcano feel more innovative, which makes a lot of sense since You’ve Got Mail is a loose remake of the 1940 James Stewart classic The Shop Around the Corner. Conversely, Groundhog Day is an inspired meditation on life, philosophy, love, & spirituality hiding in plain sight as an ordinary comedy. No one can argue with a straight face that Bill Murray & Andie MacDowell are as cute, perky, & charming as Hanks & Ryan, but his beleaguered cynicism and her enthusiastic naiveté work perfectly in Groundhog Day. It’s the kind of film one can watch over & over and discover something new each time, which seems rather appropriate.

 

      The Verdict:       

 

 

 

 

Forrest Gump             vs.              The Fugitive

After a first round bye Forrest Gump defeated Presumed Innocent, Die Hard: With A Vengeance, & Office Space to land in the Elite 8. The Fugitive received a first round bye then got past Joe Versus the Volcano, The Wedding Singer, & Father of the Bride. If you watch The Fugitive with absolutely no prior knowledge of the 60’s TV hit your enjoyment of the movie won’t suffer at all. Two powerhouse performances by Harrison Ford & Tommy Lee Jones (who won the Academy Award for Best Supporting Actor) combined with great writing & edge-of-your seat drama make for a terrific cinematic experience. Forrest Gump is based on a novel that had gone virtually unnoticed, and the movie makes changes so significant that it feels completely original. Forrest Gump has a great cast (Tom Hanks, Robin Wright, Sally Field, Gary Sinise), a fantastic soundtrack, and was both critically acclaimed & popular with the masses. I do know people that hate it, but I just don’t understand those folks at all. This is a tough one, but repeat viewings give Gump the nod in a photo finish.

    The Verdict:       

 

 

 

 

Mrs. Doubtfire             vs.              The Big Lebowski

After a first round bye Mrs. Doubtfire has beaten That Thing You Do, Tommy Boy, & Scent of a Woman.  The Big Lebowski is the lone film in The Elite 8 that did not receive a first round bye, and thus far has overcome Ten Things I Hate About You, Wayne’s World, Deep Impact, & The Shawshank Redemption. My vibe is that, in a poll of many, those that were teens or in their early 20’s back in the late 1990s would lean toward Lebowski, while older folks might favor Doubtfire. It is probably an unfair comparison, but much like the early comedies of Adam Sandler (most notably Happy Gilmore & Billy Madison), if one happened to be at the exact right age and/or maturity when The Big Lebowski was released then it is likely an essential movie for that person. That doesn’t mean that it can’t be enjoyed by others, just that its humor is quite specific & unique. Jeff Bridges is one of the most underrated thespians of his generation, and his role as The Dude (or His Dudeness, Duder, or El Duderino, if, you know, you’re not into the whole brevity thing) might be his crowning achievement, even if it’s not the kind of character or film that the awards shows fawn all over. John Goodman is another undervalued actor, and his performance as somewhat aggressive & slightly off kilter Vietnam vet Walter Sobchak is a hidden gem. Conversely, it is likely that slightly older folks…those that came of age in the 80’s as Robin Williams rose to fame…would have a greater appreciation of Mrs. Doubtfire. Williams had a rather eclectic career and was capable of playing a whole range of parts, but his wheelhouse was funny comedies in which he could put his full arsenal of comedic genius on display, and Doubtfire fit his skills like a glove. The supporting cast…including Sally Field & Pierce Brosnan…have their moments, but it’s Williams’ show and he carries it well. I suppose that I must reluctantly admit to being part of the older crowd, because, though I appreciate Lebowski for what it is, there are moments of weirdness that don’t resonate with my particular comedy palate, while Doubtfire is the kind of gentle, easygoing, family friendly humor that I tend to gravitate toward.

 

    The Verdict:       

Winning & Musing…Farewell Football

You might think it is a bit weird that we are wrapping up the football season before The Super Bowl even kicks off, and perhaps it is, but that’s one of the things we’ll talk about, as well as tying up a few other loose ends in the inaugural 2019 edition of W&M. Enjoy.

 

 

 

 

As a lifelong Pittsburgh Steelers fan I feel obligated to chime in on this Antonio Brown brouhaha. A couple of years ago Brown went on Facebook live from the locker room during a playoff postgame speech by head coach Mike Tomlin, and that was the first indicator to me that there might be an issue with his ego & attitude. Then, several months ago, a friend of mine suggested I check out a show on Animal Planet called Tanked, on which AB was a guest who was having a custom fish tank made for him. During that program I got a little more exposure to his arrogance. No one seems to be talking about the details of Brown’s falling out with quarterback Ben Roethlisberger, and I was always taught that there are three sides to every story…one side, the other side, & somewhere in the middle is the truth. Big Ben probably isn’t blameless. He has his faults, as do we all. However, given the preponderance of the evidence and the fact that Brown essentially quit on his team in the midst of a must-win scenario before the final game of the season I will not be heartbroken if the Steelers pull the trigger on a trade. Having said that, I hope that they are smart enough not to give the guy away for anything less than a first round pick, and it would be smart to send him to an NFC team. The vindictive side of me would like to see him go to a terrible team like Arizona, Tampa Bay, or Detroit, but that might be asking for too much. I’d be remiss to ignore Tomlin’s part in all of this drama. It is my personal belief that the Steelers have severely underachieved with him at the helm. That may seem a bit harsh since he has led the team to two Super Bowls and one championship, but most Steelers fans agree that the team should have won two or three additional Lombardi Trophies in the past several years. The Antonio Brown controversy has reinforced the general impression that the team lacks discipline and that Tomlin doesn’t run a tight ship. However, those calling for him to be fired are wasting their energy because that’s just not how the Steelers do things. They haven’t fired a head coach in a half century.

 

 

Zach edged me out in our college football Bowl-a-Palooza picks. He went 25-13, while I was 22-13.  I limped to the finish in our Pigskin Picks of Profundity, going 1-4 in the final week to finish the season 51-56. Conversely, Zach ended on a strong note, going 4-1 in the final week to end the season 47-61.

 

 

Congratulations to the Clemson Tigers for winning their second national championship in three years. I must confess that I watched very little of the title game because the Alabama Crimson Tide began to bore me to tears quite awhile ago, so I’m not sad at all that Clemson beat the snot out of ‘Bama by four touchdowns.

 

 

I am cautiously optimistic about new West Virginia Mountaineers head coach Neal Brown. After a few successful seasons at Troy (a 1-AA school that plays in the Sun Belt Conference) Brown comes to Morgantown after the sudden departure of former coach Dana Holgorsen. I can’t blame Holgorsen for bolting. Sure, Houston isn’t in a “Power 5” conference…but they will be, and probably sooner rather than later. Since the school is situated in the fourth largest city in America and the state of Texas is one of the top recruiting areas for elite athletes one must assume that the Cougars are a sleeping giant. There is also the fact that Holgorsen never seemed to feel totally comfortable in the Mountain State. He just never really fit in here, unlike beloved former coach Don Nehlen, who came to West Virginia in 1980 from Ohio and never left, even after he retired in 2000. Holgorsen will undoubtedly be happier in Houston and likely lead his team to great success. Meanwhile, Brown has made a good first impression and seems to quickly be fitting in just fine. Will that translate to winning on the field?? Who knows?? The truth is that no matter who the coach is the Mountaineers can probably expect to average 7 or 8 wins per season and play in a run-of-the-mill bowl game each December, but perhaps every once in awhile the stars will align, the dominos will all fall just right, and they could sneak into a Big 12 title game & maybe even the playoff. They’ve been that good maybe about a half dozen times in my 40+ years on the planet, so there’s always hope.

 

 

I’m not going to analyze my NFL Preview in detail. By now we all know I said a lot of crazy things that turned out to be completely wrong. In the NFC I only predicted 2 of the 6 playoff teams correctly, while I did a little better in the AFC, getting 4 out of 6 right. I placed way too much faith in my Steelers. Not only did they not get to The Super Bowl…they didn’t even make it to the playoffs. I nailed two of the Top 5 picks in this spring’s NFL Draft (Tampa & Arizona), and the 6-10 Denver Broncos & Cincinnati Bengals fell to 10th & 11th in the draft order only because so many other teams were even more inept, so I’m at peace with those choices. I had the Seattle Seahawks in that bottom five, but they actually went 10-6 and made the playoffs. I assume most pundits thought the San Francisco 49ers would be much better than 4-12 with the 2nd overall draft pick, but injuries destroyed their season. I really thought the Oakland Raiders & NY Jets would be rather decent this season, but they landed high draft choices as well.

 

 

As far as The Super Bowl goes, I just can’t get excited about it at all. I make no secret of my longstanding hatred of the New England Patriots, so cheering on the Los Angeles Rams would seem like a no-brainer. However, I’m not all that enthusiastic about the Rams because let’s be honest…they really shouldn’t be in the game. I don’t want to go off on a loquacious rant about officiating, but the blown call that cost the New Orleans Saints a trip to The Super Bowl was quite possibly one of the most egregious mistakes I’ve ever seen in any sport. It is inexcusable incompetence and the entire crew should be fired. The NFL needs to have some sort of mechanism in place to prevent or atleast correct such critical errors, even if it means almost total eradication of human judgment. Having said that, I suppose I will watch atleast some of “The Big Game” and pull for the Rams.

Points of Ponderation…..Episode 1.19

A semi-regular attempt to address some of life’s minutiae that might otherwise be overlooked…..

 

 

 

 

I am willing to wait & see what happens in a few weeks when a temporary agreement to end the longest government shutdown in United States history reaches zero hour. There are some that believe that ending the shutdown at all without an agreement to fund border security is President Trump’s version of President George HW Bush’s “Read my lips…no new taxes” moment, and they may be right. Those folks feel like Trump caved, that he was outmaneuvered by Speaker Nancy Pelosi. On the flip side are those who are convinced that Trump has won the battle, that he has his political opponents right where he wants them. I must confess that I am having difficulty understanding that logic. Essentially what all of this seems to come down to is whether or not one believes that the last resort option that Trump has in his back pocket…declaring border security a national emergency and getting the money for his “big beautiful wall” by circumventing Congress altogether…is a good idea. Is it shortsighted?? Could setting such a precedent come back to bite us all in the tookas someday?? Could a future (presumably Democrat) President declare a similar national emergency and do something sinister like confiscate guns?? To be honest, I don’t feel intellectually equipped to tackle such big questions, but I’m not ready to push the panic button. Let’s see how this all plays out.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I have developed…well, it’s not a short fuse…let’s call it a higher standard for interaction. Whether it’s face-to-face communication or a phone conversation my threshold is about 15 minutes. After that my patience for tedious chatter or pointless babbling is essentially non-existent. There are people in my life who I talk to on a daily basis that tend to drone on & on & on for 20 minutes, 30 minutes, 45 minutes, an hour…sometimes longer…and I just want to scream!! I can have intelligent conversations til the cows come home, but when faced with mindless blather I have started to become borderline rude, cutting people off, ending the conversation, or pretty much telling them they need to leave.

 

 

 

Liberals are people who, when confronted with facts & objective truth, will continue to push their misinformed agenda and false narrative. I wish I could just let that roll off my back and laugh, but I find it extremely irritating.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Spoiler alert…I am not thin, buff, or sexy. I know this about myself, and I’m okay with it. Would I love to shed some pounds?? Sure. Could I do a better job in an effort to accomplish that goal?? Yes. However, it is narrow-minded and completely wrong to assume that an overweight person is simply a lazy slob. I’m not going to make excuses, but there are multiple factors that determine a person’s particular body type. At any rate, whenever someone resorts to a fat joke or a comment about my weight during a…discussion of the issues…on social media I immediately know that I’ve won the debate because they haven’t got anything more cerebrally significant to add. On occasion I have been bothered by such insults to the point that I’ve changed my profile pic to a cartoon character or inanimate object, but mostly I’ve just learned to shrug off that kind of dumbassery. I recently ran across a Twitter thread in which a young lady laid out a clear & concise argument against President Trump’s wall & the whole idea that illegal immigration is even an issue. I might not agree with her conclusions, but I respect the fact that she presented a cogent case (complete with statistics) free of name-calling, foul language, & general nonsense.

The 2018 Sammy Awards – Part III

Greetings Manoverse, and welcome to the exciting conclusion of the 2018 Sammy Awards. If you haven’t already done so, please go back and check out parts 1 & 2, then we’ll meet back here.

 

 

 

All caught up?? Awesome. Please welcome back the host of our show, British comedian & talk show host Michael McIntyre!!

 

 

 

 

After some side-splitting comedy from our host it’s time to present our next award. It is a privilege for this show to reunite what ESPN never should have separated. For nearly two decades they made early morning weekday hours fun & informative for sports fans everywhere, and along the way they picked up five Sammys, including a Lifetime Achievement Award a year ago. They’re still on TV & radio, but the magic is gone, so it is wonderful to have them together again on our stage. Please welcome author, vociferous New York Jets fan, & the host of ESPN’s Get Up, Mike Greenberg, and former NFL defensive lineman & host of ESPN’s Golic & Wingo, Mike Golic!! And the nominees are:

 

 

Best Sports Story

 

The Tide Rolls Again

The 2017-18 Alabama Crimson Tide went 11-1 in the regular season and failed to even make it to the SEC title game…but it didn’t matter. The powers-that-be handed them a spot in the College Football Playoff anyway, and the Tide rolled to their 17th National Championship, their fifth in nine years with head coach Nick Saban at the helm.

 

Dr. Larry Nassar

Dr. Nassar was a physician at Michigan State University and for about 15 years served as the team doctor for USA Gymnastics. During that time he sexually abused over 200 young people, and after being sent to prison in 2017 for child pornography in 2018 he was convicted of sexual assault to minors, so he’ll be spending the rest of his life in jail and one can assume eternity in Hell.

 

Philly Wins The Super Bowl

The 2017-18 Philadelphia Eagles went 13-3 in the regular season, easily winning their division. They proceeded to cruise thru the playoffs and clash with the dastardly New England Patriots in Super Bowl LII (that’s 52 for all you non-Romans out there). What makes the story interesting is that starting quarterback Carson Wentz was lost to a torn ACL late in the season, so the Eagles ended their regular season and faced the playoffs with journeyman backup QB Nick Foles under center. Fortunately for Philly fans Foles was up to the task, and he even caught a touchdown pass in the Super Bowl.

 

The Olympics

There was a Winter Olympics in South Korea last February. Did anyone notice?? Does anyone remember a single solitary thing that happened?? I didn’t think so.

 

The Madness of a 16 Over a 1

Villanova beat Michigan to win the NCAA basketball tournament (aka March Madness), but that wasn’t the most interesting part of the event. Two other things stood out. Probably the most enduring image of the tournament is the 11th seeded Loyola-Chicago Ramblers, with their Gryffindor-esque scarves & 98 year old nun Sister Jean cheering them on, making it to the Final Four. But before that history was made in the first round when the 16th seed UMBC Retrievers upset the #1 seed Virginia Cavaliers…the first time a 16 has ever beat a 1.

 

Tiger Woods

Once upon a time Tiger Woods was not only the best golfer in the world, he was probably the top athlete overall. Of course we all know that health problems & personal issues knocked him off that perch nearly ten years ago, and it’s been a long road back. At one time it was a foregone conclusion that Woods would surpass Jack Nicklaus’ record of 18 major championships, but in the past several years most began to question whether he would ever win another major…or even a tournament. However, in 2018 Woods began to somewhat resemble his old self on the course, winning the Tour Championship in September, placing sixth at the British Open, & finishing as the runner up at the PGA Championship.

 

Ovechkin Wins The Cup

Alex Ovechkin has been considered one of the best hockey players in the world since debuting with the Washington Capitals more than a decade ago. However, his talent had not translated into post-season success, with the Caps being ousted early year after year. That all changed in 2018, as Ovechkin led his team to their first Stanley Cup.

 

The Warriors Beat Lebron…Again

The Golden State Warriors have faced the Cleveland Cavaliers in the NBA Finals for four straight seasons. In 2015 & 2017 the Warriors won pretty easily. In 2016 Lebron James willed the Cavaliers to a Game 7 victory. What would happen in 2018?? Well…a sweep for Golden St. It wasn’t pretty, and really not that interesting.

 

France Wins The World Cup

Look, I realize that soccer is the most popular sport in the world. I know we Americans march to the beat of a different drummer. I have tried to develop an interest in soccer, but I just can’t do it. At any rate, Russia hosted the 2018 World Cup, and France defeated Croatia in the final. The United States failed to even qualify for the tournament, so any infinitesimal interest some of us might have had pretty much died before the event even began.

 

LA-Bron

After another crushing defeat in the NBA Finals it became clear that Lebron James wouldn’t be spending the last few years of his basketball career wasting away in Cleveland. The fact that he ever returned in the first place is a miracle because it is obvious that James’ relationship with Cavs owner Dan Gilbert wasn’t great, and that Gilbert doesn’t really have the means or the alacrity to put together a championship caliber team. Thankfully James’ didn’t make the same mistakes he made back when he initially ditched the Cavs for the Miami Heat in 2010. There was no “Decision” on TV. Whether it is the glitz & glamor of Hollywood, the history of Showtime, Kareem, Magic, Kobe, et al, planning ahead for a future after basketball, or the allure of working with team President Magic Johnson, it came as no surprise when Lebron James joined the Los Angeles Lakers. After a shaky start the Lakers are in playoff contention, although they probably can’t be considered legit title contenders at the moment.

 

Urban Meyer

2018 was quite the roller coaster ride for Ohio State Buckeyes football coach Urban Meyer. He was suspended for the first three games of the season after mishandling domestic violence allegations against a former assistant coach. The team fared well without him and looked like solid playoff contenders, but an October loss to Purdue doomed the Buckeyes’ playoff hopes. Meyer announced that he’d retire following the team’s bowl game due to a cyst on his brain that he’s been battling for years. From what I understand the cyst is not life threatening and isn’t usually a big deal for those that have them, but Meyer’s situation seems to be a bit more than a minor annoyance. He ended his career (for now) with a big Rose Bowl victory, and since he’s only 54 years old who knows what the future may hold for him.

 

 

 

and The Sammy goes to…..

 

 

 

The Philadelphia Eagles. It’d be tempting to give Philly the award simply for beating the hated Patriots in the Super Bowl, but the fact that they did it with a backup quarterback (who was named Super Bowl MVP) and used a fun little trick play called The Philly Special to secure the victory just made the story even cooler. Can history repeat itself this year?? Stay tuned.

 

 

 

Before we hand out the final award of the evening it is our pleasure to welcome one of the most talented singers in the world. His wheelhouse is old jazz standards made popular by crooners like Frank Sinatra, Van Morrison, Dean Martin, & others, but he has produced some lovely original pop tunes and is a must listen during the Christmas season. To sing a medley of his hits & personal favorites please welcome Michael Bublè!!

 

 

Thank you Michael!! That was tremendous!!

 

 

To present our final award The Sammys are honored to welcome the oldest presenter in our brief history. At 96 years of age she is still making us laugh, as she has consistently done during a career that has spanned eight decades. She has starred in beloved television programs like The Mary Tyler Moore Show, The Golden Girls, & Mama’s Family, made frequent appearances on game shows like Match Game, The $25,000 Pyramid, & Password, and is a reliably funny guest on talk shows for many years. It is a sincere honor to welcome Betty White to the Sammy Awards. And the nominees are:

 

 

 

Biggest News Story

 

North Korean Summit

Back in June President Trump traveled to Singapore to meet with North Korean leader Kim Jong-un. It was the first ever summit between leaders of the two nations. The two men discussed Korean denuclearization and signed an agreement meant to lead to lasting peace between their countries.

 

Another Royal Wedding

In May Prince Harry, the younger son of Prince Charles & Princess Diana, married American actress Meghan Markle. I’ll give the Brits this much…they know how to make a spectacle out of just about anything.

 

Illegal Immigration, Border Security, & The Migrant Caravan

“Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breathe free, the wretched refuse of your teeming shore. Send these, the homeless, tempest-tost, to me. I lift my lamp beside the golden door!”. So goes the poem that is inscribed on the Statue of Liberty. It is true that the United States is a nation of immigrants. No one is disputing that. The issue is how & where such immigration takes place. There has to be a system. There have to be rules. There must be accountability. America is a melting pot, and when people come here we expect them to adhere to our laws, pay taxes, become productive members of society, and embrace our culture & way of life. You can’t just sneak in, live anonymously, & take take take take without contributing while breaking any rules you don’t feel like following. President Trump’s promise to build a “big beautiful wall” along the southern border was a cornerstone of his 2016 campaign, and now Democrats refuse to greenlight funding for the project. The majority of Americans are in favor of border security, but it sure seems like certain politicians in DC are putting their hatred of the President ahead of the will of the people, and for a very long time it has felt like those same bureaucrats have cared a lot more about folks from other countries…like the thousands in the “Migrant Caravan” that have been heading for the United States from Central America for several months…than they do about the Americans they allegedly represent.

 

Thai Cave Rescue

In June a team of teenage soccer players toured a cave in Thailand and became trapped when heavy rains flooded the cave, trapping the entire team inside. For more than two weeks the youngsters & their coach were in the cave while a massive rescue effort involving thousands of people took shape. The entire group was eventually rescued, although one diver…a former Thai Navy SEAL…died in the process.

 

Trump-Putin Meetings

Just a few weeks after his historic summit with Kim Jong-un President Trump went to Finland for a similar get-together with Russian President Vladimir Putin. I’m not sure what was accomplished except reigniting media accusations of Russian interference in the 2016 election.

 

Justice Kavanaugh

When Justice Anthony Kennedy announced his intention to retire at the end of July speculation immediately began about his possible replacement. After President Trump nominated Brett Kavanaugh of the DC Circuit Court of Appeals it appeared that there would be the typical political posturing but a confirmation was assumed. However, what followed captured the attention of our entire nation for weeks. 52 year old professor & psychologist Christine Blasey Ford stepped forward and accused Kavanaugh of sexually assaulting her at a high school party almost four decades ago. Though her recollections are fuzzy, the story has more holes than Sonny Corleone on the causeway in The Godfather, & she appears to be about as credible as Milli Vanilli, the news media treated Blasey Ford like the star witness at a mafia trial. What should have been a slam dunk confirmation turned into an edge-of-your-seat drama, all based on specious allegations of what Kavanaugh may or may not have done when he was a kid forty years ago. I don’t believe for a second that Kavanaugh did anything to Dr. Minnie Mouse, but even if he made a pass at her or got a bit handsy, a) how come such allegations hadn’t become a thing as he was ascending the professional ladder, & b) should we really focus that much attention on something that a person did in high school?? At the end of the day the United States Senate decided that either they didn’t believe the accusations or that it didn’t really matter in the grand scheme of life. Whatever their thought process may have been Justice Kavanaugh was confirmed and now sits on The Supreme Court.

 

Parkland High School & Pittsburgh Synagogue Shootings

On Valentine’s Day a gunman opened fire at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School in Parkland, FL, killing 17 students & staff members and injuring 17 others. The gunman was a 19 year old former student who had made numerous threats in the past, but everyone from local law enforcement to the FBI completely dropped the ball. In October a mass shooting occurred at Tree of Life Synagogue in Pittsburgh, PA. 11 people were killed, 7 were injured, and the gunman was a 46 year old man who had posted anti-Semitic rants on social media.

 

Hurricanes Florence & Michael

Hurricane Florence was a Category 4 storm that hammered The Carolinas in September. Flooding was a bigger issue than high winds. 55 deaths occurred and the hurricane caused atleast $15 billion in damage. Hurricane Michael was a Category 4 storm that hit the Florida Panhandle in early October. More than 50 deaths resulted, and more than $4 billion in damage was reported in Florida & Georgia.

 

Mid-Term Elections

The 2018 mid-term elections saw the Democrats take control of the House of Representatives and Republicans retain their majority in the Senate. Overall, considering the relentless pummeling President Trump has taken from the leftist media & Hollywood elite since the day he took office it is somewhat surprising that the Republicans fared as well as they did. The next couple of years should be loads of fun.

 

California Wildfires

The 2018 wildfire season is the deadliest & most destructive wildfire season on record in California, with a total of 8527 fires burning an area of 1,893,913 acres. The fires caused more than $3.5 billion in damages and over 100 people died.

 

 

 

and The Sammy goes to…..

 

 

 

Justice Kavanaugh. I have said from Day 1 that the biggest reason I voted for Donald Trump was because I trusted him to make Supreme Court nominations more than Hillary Clinton. Nearly everything else a President does can be changed with the stroke of a pen by Congress or the next President, but the Supreme Court is a lifetime appointment that can shape our country for decades. There are oftentimes arguments & battles over nominees, but I don’t know if we’ve ever seen anything like what happened to Brett Kavanaugh. Only two people know what exactly happened at that party back in 1982…if anything happened at all. I didn’t find Christine Blasey Ford to be the least bit believable, and I am convinced that the whole debacle was a political hit job designed to destroy Trump’s nominee. However, IF something did happen to Ms. Ford and Kavanaugh was involved, then questions have to be asked. Why wasn’t this made public many years ago?? How had Kavanaugh gotten this far in his career if he is really such a scoundrel?? Should a middle-aged person be punished for being a creep when they were a teenager?? These are discussions worth having, because we need to decide acceptable parameters for destroying peoples’ lives. The Senate decided…for whatever reason…that, whether or not Brett Kavanaugh did something wrong forty years ago, he deserved an opportunity, based on his professional track record of success, to sit on the highest Court in the land, and now we prepare for the next skirmish.

 

 

 

 

 

evangelist Billy Graham…former President & First Lady George HW Bush & Barbara Bush…physicist Stephen Hawking…legendary sportscaster Keith Jackson… The Queen of Soul Aretha Franklin…Hall of Fame pro wrestler Bruno Sammartino…comic book creator Stan Lee (Spider-Man, The X-Men, Iron Man, Thor, The Hulk, The Fantastic Four, Black Panther, Daredevil, Doctor Strange, Scarlet Witch, Ant-Man)…actress (Laverne & Shirley) and director (Big, Awakenings, A League of Their Own) Penny Marshall… TV chef Anthony Bourdain… retired NBA coaches Jack McKinney (LA Lakers, Indiana Pacers) & Tex Winter (Chicago Bulls) and players Hal Greer (Philadelphia 76ers), Jo Jo White (Boston Celtics), Clifford Rozier (Golden St. Warriors), & Lonnie Shelton (NY Knicks)…TV host Robin Leach (Lifestyles of the Rich & Famous)…retired NFL players Jim Taylor (Green Bay Packers), Bennie Cunningham (Pittsburgh Steelers), Tommy McDonald (Philadelphia Eagles), Dwight Clark (San Francisco 49ers), Wes Hopkins (Philadelphia Eagles), Gabe Rivera (Pittsburgh Steelers), Billy Cannon (Houston Oilers), Bill Fralic (Atlanta Falcons), & Ron Johnson (Pittsburgh Steelers)…former New Jersey Governor Brendan Byrne…Pittsburgh, PA meteorologist Joe DeNardo & sportscaster Sam Nover….actors Burt Reynolds (Smokey & The Bandit, Hooper, The Longest Yard, The Cannonball Run), Jerry Van Dyke (Coach, My Mother the Car), John Mahoney (Frasier, Say Anything, Striking Distance), Harry Anderson (Night Court), Bill Daily (I Dream of Jeannie, The Bob Newhart Show), Donnelly Rhodes (Soap, Double Trouble), Louis Zorich (Mad About You), Frank Parker (Days of Our Lives), Mickey Jones (National Lampoon’s Vacation, Tin Cup, Home Improvement), David Ogden Stiers (MASH), Chuck McCann (mostly know for TV commercials), R. Lee Ermey (Full Metal Jacket), Verne Troyer (the Austin Powers series), Donald Moffett (The Right Stuff , The Bonfire of the Vanities, Trapped in Paradise), Herb Ellis (The Andy Griffith Show), Tab Hunter (Grease 2), Daniel Pilon (Dallas, Guiding Light), Robert Mandan (Soap, The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas, Three’s a Crowd), Joseph Campanella (Days of Our Lives), & Ken Berry (Mayberry RFD, F-Troop, Mama’s Family) …authors Tom Wolfe (The Right Stuff, The Bonfire of the Vanities), William Goldman  (The Princess Bride, screenwriter of Butch Cassidy & the Sundance Kid and All the President’s Men), Harlan Ellison (Star Trek’s “City on the Edge of Forever”), & Philip Roth (American Pastoral, Portnoy’s Complaint)…retired MLB umpire Doug Harvey…Hugh Wilson (creator of WKRP in Cincinnati)…infamous gangster Whitey Bulger…Weather Channel co-founder John Coleman…NFL player Edwin Jackson (Indianapolis Colts)…actresses Margot Kidder (Superman), Charlotte Rae (Diff’rent Strokes, Facts of Life), Peggie McCay (Days of Our Lives, The Andy Griffith Show), Connie Sawyer (When Harry Met Sally, Dumb & Dumber), Lari White (Cast Away), Nanette Fabray (One Day at a Time), Katherine MacGregor (Little House on the Prairie), Sondra Locke (The Outlaw Josey Wales, Sudden Impact)….former MLB general manager Kevin Towers (San Diego Padres, Arizona Diamondbacks)…cartoonist Mort Walker (Beetle Bailey, Hi & Lois)…retired pro golfers Bruce Lietzke & Hubert Green…musicians/singers Michael White (Thompson Twins), Vic Damone, Dean Webb (The Dillards aka The Darlings on The Andy Griffith Show), DJ Fontana, Vinnie Paul (Pantera), Daryle Singletary, Roy Clark (Hee Haw), Otis Rush, Matt “Guitar” Murphy (The Blues Brothers)…retired NFL coach Chuck Knox (Seattle Seahawks)…Steve Ditko (co-creator of Spider-Man)…former MLB players Willie McCovey San Francisco Giants), Ken Howell (LA Dodgers), Red Schoendienst (St. Louis Cardinals), Tony Bartirome (Pittsburgh Pirates), Tito Francona (Cleveland Indians), Bruce Kison (Pittsburgh Pirates), & Rusty Staub (NY Mets)…fashion designer Kate Spade…British distance runner Sir Roger Bannister (ran the first sub-4-minute mile)…disc jockey Adrian Cronauer (the inspiration for Good Morning Vietnam)…UNC Tar Heels basketball announcer Woody Durham…Pulitzer Prize winning political pundit Charles Krauthammer…professional sports franchise owners Tom Benson (New Orleans Saints & Pelicans), Paul Allen (Portland Trailblazers, Seattle Seahawks, also co-founder of Microsoft), Bob McNair (Houston Texans), Wayne Huizenga (Miami Dolphins, Florida Panthers, & Miami Marlins, also the founder of Blockbuster Video), & Alex Spanos (Los Angeles Chargers)… former U.S. Senator & Governor of Georgia Zell Miller and U.S. Senator & former Presidential candidate John McCain… television producers Steven Bochco (Hill Street Blues, L.A. Law, NYPD Blue, Doogie Howser MD), John Conboy (Capitol, Guiding Light), & Paul Junger Witt (The Golden Girls, Soap, Benson, Empty Nest, Blossom)…retired pro wrestlers/managers Jim “The Anvil” Neidhart, “Luscious” Johnny Valiant, The Dynamite Kid, Big Van Vader, Nikolai Volkoff, Paul Jones, Brickhouse Brown, Brian Christopher, Matt Cappotelli, Chris Champion, Jose Lothario, Larry “The Ax” Hennig, & Big Bully Busick…comedy club entrepreneur Mitzi Shore…Pulitzer Prize winning sportswriter Dave Anderson…talk radio host Art Bell…Oscar winning director Milos Forman (One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest, Man on the Moon)…retired college football coaches Earle Bruce (Ohio St.) & Billy Brewer (Ole Miss) and basketball coach/AD CM Newton (Kentucky)…political commentator Ed Schultz…NFL coach Tony Sparano (Dallas Cowboys, Oakland Raiders, Miami Dolphins)…Tony Award winning playwright & screenwriter Neil Simon…former Marshall Thundering Herd QB Michael Payton…brewery executive William Coors (grandson of company founder Adolph Coors)…renowned sportswriter Paul Zimmerman (Sports Illustrated, The Thinking Man’s Guide to Pro Football)… Audrey Geisel (widow of “Dr. Seuss” Theodore Geisel)…NASCAR Hall-of-Famer David Pearson… infamous brothel owner Dennis Hof (Las Vegas’ Bunny Ranch)… former WV Mountaineers assistant basketball coach Gary McPherson

The 2018 Sammy Awards – Part II

Welcome back to the 2018 Sammy Awards as we continue our fond farewell to the past year. After some amusing observations from host Michael McIntyre it’s time to move forward with the show.

 

 

 

 

 

The Sammy Awards doesn’t shy away from controversy, and we tend to lean in a rebellious direction. So to present our next award please welcome two of the more successful actors in Hollywood. First, he’s a two time Academy Award winner and has come out as gay, although that may have possibly been a weak PR attempt to divert attention from “sexual misconduct” allegations (for which he was fired from his successful TV show House of Cards). Please give a pensive & slightly confused round of polite applause to Kevin Spacey!! Joining him is a young man who has starred in about a dozen lightly regarded & easily forgotten alleged comedies in the past few years. He was all set to host this year’s Academy Awards until politically incorrect jokes that he tweeted several years ago were suddenly discovered by ill-humored old curmudgeons who compelled him to quit. Give a warm welcome to Kevin Hart!! And the nominees are:

 

 

The Twitter Award for Most Interesting Water Cooler Topic

 

Tide Pods

I love Tide Pods…to do my laundry. But in 2018 some folks had a different idea & decided they’d make a good snack. Stupid people are the best job security doctors will ever have.

 

Stormy Daniels

She’s a stripper & a porn star, and apparently she got busy with Donald Trump many years before he ran for President. Those of us with critical thinking skills couldn’t possibly care less, but the media has made Ms. Daniels famous. No one is saying Trump is a saint, but that’s not really breaking news. Everyone knew about his shortcomings from Day 1, and the vast majority of folks outside of the heathen strongholds of New York, California, & Chicago decided he was still a better choice than Hillary Clinton. But kudos to Ms. Daniels for making the most of her 15 minutes.

 

Roseanne Barr

I was never a fan of Barr or her eponymous 90’s sitcom. The reboot of that show didn’t interest me in the least, despite her “coming out” as a Trump supporter. The reboot did monster ratings, but ABC cancelled it in a fit of self-righteous rage after Barr tweeted a comparison between Obama disciple Valerie Jarrett and a character from the recent Planet of the Apes films. The tweet was deemed racist, even though it clearly wasn’t meant to be. Jarrett actually does look eerily similar to the movie character. At any rate, ABC quickly realized their mistake and gave the show new life, albeit without Barr. The Conners has struggled in the ratings and will likely be cancelled, meaning no one in this unnecessary melodrama wins.

 

Mueller Investigation

Former FBI Director Robert Mueller was appointed to investigate alleged Russian interference in the 2016 Presidential Election almost as soon as the results were announced. Nearly two years later a handful of indictments & a few convictions have occurred, but as far as the election goes it seems like the best he can come up with is that the Russians may have posted some anti-Clinton propaganda on social media. Oh the horror!! If that kind of thing is deemed “interference” then perhaps all campaign advertisements & TV commercials should be banned. The simple truth is that The Establishment hates Trump and has conducted a witch hunt to destroy him since the day he became a legitimate threat to their power, and the sad part is that someday their plot just might work.

 

iHOB

Last summer people were legitimately stunned when restaurant chain IHOP announced they were changing their named to IHOB. Of course what many seemed to miss was that the restaurant was never actually going to change their name at all. It was simply a marketing campaign to promote a renovated lineup of burgers on their menu. About a month later the chain announced that they were “changing their name back” to IHOP, and still a lot of folks just didn’t get it.

 

Fleetwood Mac

Lineup changes & squabbles amongst bandmates are nothing new to music, so I suppose that it shouldn’t be a total shock that 70’s supergroup Fleetwood Mac recently tossed aside longtime guitarist Lindsey Buckingham after he’d been with the band for four decades. One would expect more mature behavior from 70 year olds.

 

Fortnite

I don’t know. It’s some sort of video game that the kids are into. I don’t care.

 

Bill Cosby

Cosby was nominated for this same award back in 2014, at which time it was stated that “nothing has been proven and it never will be because the things that allegedly occurred happened far enough in the past that statutes of limitations have all run out”. That was wrong, because in April 2018 he was convicted on three counts of aggravated indecent assault and sentenced to 3-10 years in prison. What a sad fate for the 81 year old comic legend.

 

Water On Mars

Back in the summer researchers discovered a lake about 12 miles wide under the south polar ice cap on Mars. Previous research found possible signs of intermittent liquid water flowing on the Martian surface, but this is the first sign of a persistent body of water on the planet in the present day.

 

Papa John

John Schnatter, founder & CEO of the pizza giant, stepped down about a year ago after allegedly controversial comments made about NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell and his poor handling of the infamous anthem protest. He then landed in hot water again last summer after using a racial slur in a conversation about the anthem protests. The truth?? Schnatter is a Republican & a Trump supporter, and the things he said wouldn’t have been that big of a deal if he wasn’t.

 

Yanny or Laurel??

Last May social media & other outlets were abuzz due to an audio recording in which a person heard a voice say either the word “Yanny” or the word “Laurel”. I heard “Laurel” clear as a bell, as did the majority of my friends & family, though there were exceptions. The whole thing is an auditory illusion, as both sounds are on the recording. Some people focus on the higher frequency & hear “Yanny”, while others zero in on the lower frequency of the word “Laurel”. At any rate, it was a frivolously fun bit of conversation for a day or two.

 

 

 

and The Sammy goes to…..

 

 

 

Roseanne Barr. Do I care that her show was cancelled? Not at all. Do I care about the fate of The Conners? Nope. However, I do believe it is sad how overly sensitive we’ve become in America. I think Barr should have been smarter, more aware of how tenuous her position was (given her “controversial” political opinions), & mindful of the fact that comedy has…unfortunately…been put under a politically correct microscope. I don’t consider what she tweeted to be the least bit offensive, and it actually has elements of truth, but one must understand how The Game is played in 21st century America. One must be ready to conform or suffer the consequences. Social media is a minefield, and the punishment can be swift & harsh…or even catch up to a person many years later. The rules are rather fluid.

 

 

 

To present our next award we are proud to introduce a young lad who became somewhat famous this past year after being discovered by talk show host Ellen DeGeneres. He is a YouTube sensation whose brutally honest videos critiquing odd recipes are absolutely hysterical. Jesus take the wheel…it’s Kalen Allen!! And the nominees are:

 

 

 

The DB Cooper Award (For the Person Who Most Needs to Disappear)

 

Don Lemon

Is there a bigger douchenozzle in the media than CNN’s Don Lemon?? Since he’s black AND gay he is beloved by leftists everywhere, but what strikes me is just how angry & bitter he seems. The man is 52 years old, has a great TV gig, & the world is his oyster. What’s his freakin’ problem?? Remember the days when the folks reporting the news were atleast pretty good at hiding their bias?? Those days are gone, and Lemon is the poster child for everything wrong with his profession.

 

Samantha Bee

Full disclosure…I’ve never watched an episode of Bee’s TBS show Full Frontal. However, I watch enough reruns of The Big Bang Theory on that channel to have seen multiple ads for the show, and I just don’t get it. Okay okay…I understand political humor and the fact that Jon Stewart made such shows cool, and I can be as snarky as anyone. I have no issue with any of that, even if I disagree with the views being expressed. But humor…like great music & good food…requires a certain dexterity & finesse. Bee’s brand of bombastic sarcasm seems to be turned up to 11 all the time, and I can’t imagine sitting thru thirty minutes of that is enjoyable for anybody. It’s the same issue that has ruined late night talk shows. You want to go after President Trump?? Okay, that’s fair. But full throttle?? Every day?? At some point the beatdown becomes tedious and people want to laugh at different jokes.

 

The Obamas

Most former Presidents & First Ladies fade away into the sunset, shunning the limelight & letting their successors do their thing, whether or not they agree politically. Not these two. They seize every opportunity to soak in the adulation that people still inexplicably shower upon them, and never miss a chance to criticize & undermine the current Administration. It’s disgusting.

 

Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez

I cannot believe that the people of New York actually voted this imbecile into Congress. Let’s face it…there are two political parties, and depending on one’s education, background, lifestyle, etc. there are going to be some politicians that we agree with & some we don’t…but generally we can all concede the fact that the folks representing us in cities & states nationwide as well as those populating Washington DC are reasonably intelligent people regardless of philosophical differences. I’m not sure that’s the case with this one. She’s the youngest person ever voted into the United States Congress and it shows. She seemingly has a very tenuous grasp on economic reality, common sense, & critical thinking, and appears to have the maturity level of the drunken sorority babes that I used to chat up in bars at 1am twenty-five years ago. I’m not familiar with Ms. Cortez’s district or the circumstances that led folks there to believe for a single solitary second that she was a reasonably good choice, but it is difficult to fathom that they could’ve have had worse options.

 

Robert DeNiro

Not only did DeNiro stop making good movies over a decade ago, but now he fancies himself a political commentator & socioeconomic expert. The truth is that he’s just a foul-mouthed, washed up, angry has-been like so many of his Hollywood friends. Stay in your lane Bobby.

 

Omarosa Manigault-Newman

I don’t watch reality television, and that includes Trump’s old show The Apprentice. Apparently this woman was a controversial contestant on that program over a decade ago, and then she became a staffer on the Presidential campaign a few years back. After Trump won the election he hired her to be part of his staff at the White House, but she lasted less than a year before resigning or being forced out (depending on who you believe). Since her departure from The White House Omarosa has gone completely off the rails, publicly turning against her old boss, releasing tapes of private conversations, & writing a “tell-all” book that the President’s staff has said is basically a load of poppycock. I have always been amazed by how some reality TV “stars” are successful at remaining in the spotlight far longer than they deserve, and in this case President Trump has to share part of the blame for helping the woman retain a shred of relevance before she used his kindness against him for her own gain.

 

Oprah Winfrey

For a brief moment in 2018 there was actually a movement afoot to persuade Oprah to run for President in 2020. Please…give me a freakin’ break. She’d be ten times the nightmare Donald Trump has been at his very worst.

 

Seth Meyers, Stephen Colbert, & Jimmy Kimmel

I’m over the whole late night TV thing. Oh sure I get a bit nostalgic occasionally & miss the good ol’ days of Carson, Letterman, Leno, Snyder, Costas, & Ferguson. I might even tune into Fallon for 5 or 10 minutes once in awhile. But for the most part I have become quite comfortable spending time after the late local news reading a bit, watching a movie, playing a game on my phone, catching up on whatever I’ve DVRed, chillin’ with some tunes, or even going to sleep at a decent hour. And it’s all because of these guys. Sadly they are all young enough that they’ll probably be hosting their shows for another two or three decades, but it’d be nice if they’d all just disappear from television and be replaced by hosts who would return the format to its former glory and decide that being funny is more important than being a political hack.

 

Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg

I wish no ill will toward Justice Ginsburg. I hope she lives until she’s 150. But the fact is that, at 85 years old, she no longer has the mental capacity to sit on The Supreme Court. A Supreme Court justice should be one of the sharpest individuals with one of the keenest minds on the planet, and there are very few people that age that meet such criteria, no matter how brilliant they once were. I am a strict constructionist when it comes to The Constitution, so I hesitate to advocate for a mandatory retirement age or term limits for The Court, but one would hope that Justice Ginsburg will do the right thing sooner rather than later, despite what she may think about the current President or feel about his power to replace her with someone with whom she might not agree.

 

 

 

and The Sammy goes to…..

 

 

 

All of Them. Y’all know the drill by now. These people just need to shut their pieholes. Go away. Get out. Good riddance. Don’t let the door hit you where the Good Lord split you.

 

 

 

 

 

To present our next award we are honored to welcome a big screen legend who began his career on television and has the perfect voice for radio. He is an Academy Award winning actor who has starred in classics like The Shawshank Redemption, Deep Impact, Now You See Me, Christoper Nolan’s Dark Knight Trilogy, & Bruce Almighty. Let’s raise the roof for Morgan Freeman!! And the nominees are:

 

 

 

 

Favorite TV/Radio Program

 

This Is Us

After winning this award in its first two seasons I feel like This Is Us has kind of slacked off in its third year. Now that the mystery of how & when patriarch Jack Pearson met his demise is in the rear view mirror some of the luster has worn off for me. It’s still a well-written & performed program, but I must admit that I lost interest a few episodes into Season 3 and still need to do a bit of catching up before the show returns from its “winter break” this month.

 

Pardon the Interruption

Tony & Mike continue to represent curmudgeons & cantankerous old fogeys everywhere in the glut of sports debate programming. One or both are absent with some frequency, but “Fill In” Frank Isola has become a decent substitute.

 

The Young & the Restless

I’m really going to be interested to see the direction Y&R heads in during 2019, because this past year was a bit of a roller coaster. Too many new characters, too many familiar characters absent without explanation, and plots that drag on far too long are some of the key issues the show faced in 2018, although it was still entertaining enough for me to DVR on a daily basis and catch up on late at night at a time when I used to be watching talk shows that were once funny.

 

WV MetroNews Hotline

Dave Weekley is back!! The original host of West Virginia’s late afternoon statewide radio show returned in 2018, and he hasn’t missed a beat. The program is still a potpourri of sports, news, current events, entertainment, & whatever else one might deem interesting. I need to make more of an effort to catch the podcast this year…it’s not like I have anything else better to do.

 

Highly Questionable

The only other show on ESPN besides PTI that is worthy of space on my DVR. Dan, Papi, & a rogue’s gallery of co-hosts offer intermittently biting, mostly irreverent, & always entertaining commentary on hot sports topics, and they throw in the occasional goofy video of random people doing something completely stupid. It’s a great formula with the right personalities.

 

General Hospital

I love my DVR, and one of the few shows that I record on a daily basis is GH. A big reason that I have been unable to pull the trigger on giving up my soap operas completely is because GH is still such a well-written & entertaining program with solid performances & compelling stories.

 

 

 

and The Sammy goes to…..

 

 

Highly Questionable. This might be considered somewhat of an upset, but amongst the competition HQ has become the most consistently entertaining program on a daily basis. I think what I like best is that it is a show that doesn’t take itself too seriously. The problem with ESPN the past several years is that so many of its reporters & hosts want to make sports more important than it really is. I love sports. Football, baseball, basketball, golf, & all the rest of it has been an essential part of my life, but at the end of the day it’s a game…frivolous fun designed as a distraction from the rigors of real life. Dan, Papi, & their revolving door of itinerant co-hosts understand that. They are comfortable with their relatively low spot on the television totem pole and have fun with it rather than try to convince the masses that the next thirty minutes will be life changing. I respect that, and more importantly, I laugh almost every single day at a goofy video shown on HQ or the hosts’ reaction to it. Shouldn’t that be the goal of a good TV show??

 

 

 

 

 

This seems like the appropriate place to take another break. Please join us soon for the exciting conclusion of the 2018 Sammy Awards!!

The 2018 Sammy Awards – Part I

It’s Awards Season, and y’all know what that means!! Welcome to the 8th annual Sammy Awards, the world’s quirkiest faux awards show. The Sammys are an irreverent yet respectful look back at the people, places, & things that shaped the past year. If The Sammy Awards were to be broadcast on television I think a streaming service like Netflix, Hulu, or Amazon would be the way to go for a variety of reasons. As always many of the nominees aren’t in attendance and there are no acceptance speeches. Our show isn’t a neurotic, pompous, smug snoozefest like The Oscars or The Grammys, but we do take our task a bit more seriously than anything you’ll see on MTV.

 

To host this year’s program we have procured the services of British comedian Michael McIntyre, the host of Michael  McIntyre’s Big Show on the BBC. For those of you in America & elsewhere that may be unfamiliar with Mr. McIntyre’s wit & charm there are plenty of very funny videos available online that highlight just why we are so pleased to have him as this year’s host of The Sammys.

 

After an amusing opening monologue from our host it is time for the first award of the evening. To present we are thrilled to welcome to the stage an award winning actor & musician who is no stranger to awards shows. Please welcome the star of such big screen classics as Planes, Trains, & Automobiles, Father of the Bride, and Three Amigos…Steve Martin!! And the nominees are:

 

 

Favorite Movie

 

A Futile and Stupid Gesture

Not so much a biopic as a satire of biopics, Futile tells the story of Doug Kenney, the criminally overlooked comic genius behind National Lampoon magazine, as well as Animal House and Caddyshack, two of the most beloved comedy films of all time. SNL alum Will Forte gives an oddly poignant performance as Kenney, who…like so many outwardly funny people…was deeply insecure & emotionally fragile. You’ll see a bunch of well-known faces portraying even more famous people who were in Kenney’s orbit, and the whole movie has a tongue-in-cheek, self-referential vibe. Futile doesn’t take itself seriously at all, but perhaps it should’ve. It wasn’t released in theaters but is instead a Netflix movie, and the production value is notably…economical. It’s a solidly entertaining story, but one must understand…without Doug Kenney we would have never had National Lampoon or probably Saturday Night Live, some of the greatest comedy films of all time wouldn’t have existed, & several legendary careers might not have ever gotten off the ground. His life probably deserved a bigger budget.

 

Blockers

John Cena, Leslie Mann, & MadTV alum Ike Barinholtz star as helicopter parents trying desperately to stop their three daughters from following thru on a sex pact on prom night. The prom night sex thing is an overdone movie trope, but this is a fresh angle that provides a few laughs. I’m not sure how comfortable I am with the not-so-subtle message that parents are intrusive & out-of-touch losers while kids have everything under control, but I assume it’s intended to be some kind of feminist empowerment poppycock. In general Blockers is mildly entertaining but ultimately forgettable.

 

Ocean’s 8

Speaking of feminist empowerment…

The Ocean’s franchise is now out of the hands of Clooney, Pitt, Damon, & their band of Merry Men, handed off in this “sequel” to Sandra Bullock and a crew of ladies that she assembles for a jewelry heist. I love the Ocean’s movies and have no issue with spinning it off in this fashion, but the execution lacks…something. The cast is…okay, although it certainly doesn’t measure up to their predecessors. The heist goes a little too smoothly so the story lacks any kind of tension, and the motivation for it is uninspiring. I’m disappointed that the plot has Danny Ocean dead, because fans of the previous films would like to imagine he & wife Tess living the good life and enjoying the millions that he stole over the years. I kept expecting George Clooney to make a surprise experience since faking his death seems like something Danny would do, but he never showed up. Perhaps they’re saving that twist for future films.

 

Uncle Drew

NBA star Kyrie Irving, along with retired basketball players Shaquille O’Neal, Chris Webber, Reggie Miller, & Nate Robinson, portray geriatric former street ballers who missed out on their shot at glory years ago but are now recruited by a down-on-his-luck store clerk to return to NY City’s famed Rucker Park to help win the big tournament. I had rather low expectations for the film but was pleasantly surprised. Irving might actually have a future in acting when he’s done playing hoops.

 

Show Dogs

This movie wasn’t on my radar until a neighbor of mine suggested it, but it is acceptably entertaining. The story follows a cop who goes undercover at a dog show to bust an exotic animal smuggler. It is a live action film, but all of the dogs “talk”, voiced by folks like Shaquille O’Neal , Ludacris, American Idol alum Jordin Sparks, & RuPaul. There was some controversy about a scene where a dog’s…sensitive area…is…ummm…”handled”…by a dog show judge, which I guess is what actually happens at those events. The movie was eventually edited, but I saw it before all of that occurred and didn’t think anything of it.

 

Night School

Hollywood may not allow Kevin Hart to host the Oscars (because of ‘homophobic” comments & tweets…what we used to call jokes…some from a decade ago), but he always seems to star in atleast one of two mildly amusing movies every year. This time around he portrays a thirtysomething high school dropout who is compelled to attend night school & get his GED. Hilarity ensues, or atleast a few sporadic chuckles.

 

A Star Is Born

Lady Gaga & Bradley Cooper headline the latest remake of a tried & true cinematic formula, with notable supporting performances from Sam Elliott, Dave Chappelle, & Andrew Dice Clay. Cooper also directs, and he seems to have a knack for it. The concert scenes really provide a sense of the energy boost one feels from the combination of a live crowd & amped up music. I’ve said for years that Gaga doesn’t need crazy costumes & an outrageous persona…she’s a lovely woman with a beautiful & powerful voice. Not only does the film prove it, but it also kind of pokes fun at that exact contrast.

 

Tag

Based on a true story about a group of childhood buddies who’ve continued the same game of Tag well into adulthood. It’s a unique premise that makes the movie feel like one we’ve not seen before, which is cool.

 

Hotel Transylvania 3: Summer Vacation

I loved the first two Hotel Transylvania films, but with this third entry I kind of feel like the story has run its course. Sandler, Samberg, Selena Gomez, Buscemi, Spade, & all the rest return to lend their voices to now familiar characters, and they are joined by Kathryn Hahn as a mysterious ship’s captain with whom Dracula becomes smitten.  Not a bad movie…but not great either.

 

Christopher Robin

Winnie the Pooh’s human friend is now all grown up and living the humdrum & downtrodden adult life, complete with job pressures & a failing marriage. When Pooh, Tigger, Piglet, Eeyore, et al re-enter his life Christopher is at first annoyed & exasperated, but he eventually remembers his carefree & happy childhood. It’s a really cute film and I expect a sequel or two or three.

 

The Christmas Chronicles

When I first saw the trailer online I got the vibe that this movie might be rather lame, but I was pleasantly surprised. Kurt Russell stars in the Netflix original as Santa Claus like we’ve never seen Santa Claus. When two kids facing their first Christmas without their father decide to stay up to see The Jolly Old Elf in action they inadvertently threaten Christmas for the entire world and must spend the night helping St. Nick save the holiday. The story is fresh, Russell is engaging, & the kids are alright. I’m not sure it’ll become a beloved yuletide tradition or even spawn a sequel, but it’s a fun little Christmas distraction.

 

Like Father

Kelsey Grammer stars as the estranged father of a Type A workaholic daughter who is ditched at the altar. He ends up accompanying her on the vacation that was supposed to be her honeymoon and the two repair their damaged relationship. This is another Netflix film, and I have to opine that I am impressed with the original content that they are offering.

 

The Grinch

It’s better than the live action Jim Carrey atrocity from almost two decades ago, but doesn’t measure up to the original half hour special produced back in the 1960’s. In this latest incarnation of a familiar story The Grinch isn’t so much of a monster with a brain full of spiders & termites in his soul as much as he is an introverted, hypersensitive, antisocial hermit, and Cindy Lou Who is the daughter of a stressed out & overworked single mother. Whoville is a bustling little hotbed of Christmas commerce, though I must say it is depicted beautifully with superb computer animation. This is a cool movie to look at, even if the plot isn’t all that compelling.

 

Holmes & Watson

I’ve been a Sherlockian since junior high school, though admittedly I tend to stick mostly with the original stories and eschew the plethora of modern updates, remakes, reboots, & reimaginings. However, I couldn’t resist a comedic take on the world’s most famous detective from the same crew that brought us Talladega Nights & Step Brothers. Unfortunately for Will Ferrell & John C. Reilly this movie doesn’t measure up to their previous pairings. Is it as bad as its 8% rating on Rotten Tomatoes?? I don’t think it is quite that appalling…just dull & uninteresting.

 

 

 

and The Sammy goes to…..

 

 

 

A Star Is Born. Full disclosure: I have never seen any of the previous versions of this story, but I can’t imagine that the 1976 adaptation starring Barbara Streisand & Kris Kristofferson, the 1954 movie with Judy Garland, or the 1937 original could be any better. Bradley Cooper has proven himself to be a talented & versatile actor, and now he takes things to a different level by adding director, producer, & screenwriter to his resume. The music is superb, and supporting performances by Sam Elliot, Dave Chappelle, & Andrew “Dice” Clay are pitch perfect.

 

 

 

To present our next award we are pleased to welcome three beautiful ladies who have one thing in common…they have all escaped the moral quagmire & career abyss of daytime television’s angriest show, The View. Please welcome the star of 90’s sitcom Full House & its Netflix revival Fuller House, Candace Cameron Bure!! Joining her is a former contestant on Survivor and a former co-host of Fox & Friends…give a warm welcome to Elisabeth Hasselbeck. And finally, she is a former ABC News correspondent and now hosts a podcast called Journeys of Faith…give it up for Paula Faris!! And the nominees are:

 

 

App of the Year

 

Words with Friends

Basically it is Scrabble, and I’ve always loved Scrabble. I’m all about word games rather than shooting/war type games. I haven’t been into it as much this past year as I’d been in the past, but I still play a game or two a couple of times a week.

 

Amazon Music

I haven’t purchased music in years. My tastes are rather eclectic and what I want to listen to depends on my mood, so streaming is the way to go for me. At $8/month it is well worth the price.

 

Spades Plus

I’ve always liked playing card games but throughout my life have had difficulty finding others with which to engage. Of course The Internet has changed all of that, and in 2018 I revived my love of Spades. Most of the time I find the game very relaxing. It’s usually the first thing I do after I get home & settle down to chill out, and it has become a nice late night time waster that has taken the place of the comedy shows that I used to watch after the local news. Occasionally the game can be frustrating…doubly so if I’m stuck with a partner who has no clue how to play or when I’m just not getting good cards. Sometimes…because everyone is anonymous & no one knows each other…it is a bit too easy for people to hurl insults & use foul language. However, all things considered, I have enjoyed the hours I’ve spent playing the game immensely, and I’m glad I stumbled upon this particular app.

 

Facebook Messenger

I think Messenger has become more useful than Facebook itself. The direct line of communication is much more efficient than even a phone call.

 

Amazon

Every once in awhile I have some disposable income and decide to go on a book buying binge. When that mood strikes the Amazon app is a lifesaver, because if I’m in the bookstore at the local mall and see something I want I can very easily verify that I can get it much cheaper online and have it delivered to my door in a couple of days. Thanks to the Amazon app I’ve saved a significant amount of money, and negatively impacted the bottom line of the mall bookstore.

 

 

 

and The Sammy goes to…..

 

 

 

Spades Plus. To date I have played nearly 2600 games, and that’s in just a few months!! I am absolutely addicted. Sometimes I have to make myself stop playing so I can get some sleep at night or do something productive during the day, but mostly it’s just a fun activity to do while I have a few moments of downtime. I enjoy the strategy and the small element of risk. Sometimes I wish my partners were a bit more savvy and my opponents less obnoxious, but those issues haven’t deterred my enjoyment of the game thus far.

 

 

 

 

This seems like the appropriate place to take a break. Please join us soon for Part II of the 2018 Sammy Awards!!