Holidays & Celebrations

Where we’ll talk alot about various aspects of Christmas, but also many of the other days on the calendar that we celebrate as well.

The Sammy Claus Wish List 2012

Yes West Virginia, there is a Sammy Claus. I exist as surely as football, good books, Italian food, & puppies exist, and I know that they abound and give my life its joy & meaning. Alas! How would The Manofesto exist if there were no Sammy Claus?? It would be really dreary, like a Lady Gaga concert or being a Pittsburgh Pirates fan. There would be no Amazon.com then, no high definition television, no chocolate bars to make tolerable this existence. We would have no enjoyment, except in sleep & dreams. The eternal light with which bachelorhood fills the Manoverse would be extinguished. Not believe in Sammy Claus?? You might as well not believe in sunshine or naps!! Nobody sees Sammy Claus, but that doesn’t mean there is no Sammy Claus. The most real things in the world are those that neither Ronnie Milsap nor Lt. Commander Geordi La Forge can see. No Sammy Claus?? Thank God I live, and will live forever…or atleast hopefully for another several decades. A thousand years from now, nay, ten times ten thousand years from now, my legacy shall continue to make glad the hearts of bored & lonely web surfers everywhere.

 

For now though, you’ll just have to settle for the 2012 edition of The Wish List. As always, I yield no authority in making these dreams a reality and just have to hope that The Jolly Old Elf himself checks it out and may see fit to provide folks with the gifts which I am suggesting for them. Enjoy…and God bless us…everyone.

 

 

 

generic-hostess-twinkies-11_20121116160001_640_480Twinkies, HoHo’s, & Ding Dongs

A triumphant return. Over?? Nothing is over until we decide it is!! Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor?? Hell no!! And it ain’t over now.

 

 

wvWV Mountaineers football

A new defensive coordinator

 

 

Mitt-Romney-241055-4-402Mitt Romney

A very happy retirement from politics and much success in all future endeavors

 

 

51xf+aWEh-L._SL500_AA300_The Learning Channel & The History Channelhbb

Remembrance of their initial purposes. I’d include MTV too but even if they’d start playing music videos again I wouldn’t watch.

 

 

a-taylor-swift-1Taylor Swift

No more boyfriends for about 10 years!!

 

 

gavelSupreme Court Justices Antonin Scalia, Clarence Thomas, Anthony Kennedy, & Samuel Alito

Good health & long lives

 

 

jetsThe NY Jets

A complete overhaul…new coaches, New GM, new QB, new RB, new WRs

 

 

american-flagConservatism

A voice that can properly articulate the message to America

 

 

katie-holmesKatie Holmes

The love of a good man…a normal man…a man who isn’t obsessed with some kind of freaky religious cult.

 

 

Belle-and-Gaston-50-Shades-of-GreyWomen Who Are Into 50 Shades of Grey

A Bible

 

 

sandler_rectAdam Sandler

Better taste in movies

 

 

obama_dr_evil51% of American Voters

All the chaos, socialism, higher taxes, and free stuff you voted for. You shall reap what you sow, and be careful what you ask for…you just might get it.

 

 

matt-lauer-today-show-tmz-2Matt Lauer

A slap in the face hard enough to knock his smugness into next week

 

 

Linnew-lindsay-lohan-mug-shotdsay Lohan

A good long stint in prison, because apparently that’s the only thing that’s going to get her attention.

 

 

c03-costas-21-4_3_r560Bob Costas, Rob Parker, & All Other Sports “Journalists”

The understanding that we don’t give a damn about your opinions on sociopolitical issues. Just gives us the scores, show some highlights, and do a little analysis of the games & teams. Do your job and keep your commentary to yourself.

 

 

kate-william-620_1763634bEngland’s Prince William & Kate Middleton

A healthy happy baby

 

 

dsc_1228NY City Mayor Michael Bloomberg

A 64 ounce Big Gulp

 

 

goodevil-copyThe NFL

A new commissioner

 

 

1345774554_7952_logo_abc_familyABC Family

The realization that it is unnecessary to have their logo in the corner of the TV screen constantly. It’s distracting and makes me want to change the channel.

 

 

bibleThe “Marriage Equality” Crowd

A Bible

 

 

134731142189_squareRihanna & Selena Gomezselena-gomez-hairstyles

Better taste in men

 

 

 

The 2nd Amendment

Flag-GodProtection from those who don’t understand that The Constitution isn’t the problem, lack of morality is.

 

 

 

big leastThe Big East

Extinction. Seriously, give up the ghost already.

 

 

Hanson_thumb_8-20-10NFL RedZone Host Scott Hanson

A huge bladder

 

 

 

As has become tradition I shall wrap up with a quote from the Rankin-Bass animated classic Santa Claus Is Comin’ To Town:

“Lot’s of unhappiness? Maybe so. But doesn’t Santa take a little bit of that unhappiness away? Doesn’t a smile on Christmas morning scratch out a tear cried on AD_93889_SANTAJESUSa sadder day? Not much maybe. But what would happen if we all tried to be like Santa and learned to give as only he can give –  of ourselves, our talents, our love and our hearts? Maybe we could all learn Santa’s beautiful lesson and maybe there would finally be peace on Earth and good will toward men.”

Related articles

Thanksgiving, Black Friday, & The Christmas Creep

Happy Holidays citizens of The Manoverse!! Alas, today I come not to praise our most wonderful time of the year, but to express a bit of frustration.

 

Yesterday we celebrated that most American of holidays…Thanksgiving. We’ll look at the holiday itself a little closer this time next year because I am currently reading a delightful book about its history, but I just ran out of time to finish it before the big day itself came & went. However, for now let me just say that I feel bad for Thanksgiving. It really has begun to get lost in the shuffle the past decade or so. We don’t appreciate Thanksgiving on its own merits anymore. Instead we look at it merely as the kickoff to the Christmas season. If Christmas is the Super Bowl then Thanksgiving is the pre-game show to which people don’t bother giving their full attention. There was a time, believe it or not, in colonial America that Thanksgiving was the main event and Christmas wasn’t even commemorated. Thanksgiving was a celebration that lasted for several days in reverence to God and the blessings that He had seen fit to bestow. Somehow we’ve gone from that deeply spiritual sense of appreciation to treating Thanksgiving like a Nascar pit stop where we take just a few minutes out of our busy schedule to stuff our faces with turkey, stuffing, & pie and maybe watch a football game before rushing to the mall for some retail therapy. All we care about is that we have a paid day off from the job we hate and get a free pass on our diet for the day. Those things aren’t necessarily bad (because really…who doesn’t enjoy a day off & a big hunk o’ pie??), but they should be secondary benefits, not the main focus of our gratitude.

 

Things have gotten progressively crazier over the past decade with the growth of a phenomenon called Black Friday. The term itself was coined back in the 60’s or 70’s, and interestingly was originally an environmentalist wacko reference. It alluded to the increased traffic that clogs up the streets (and pollutes the air) on the Friday after Thanksgiving. Eventually it evolved to mean the day when retailers go “in the black”, i.e. when their year becomes profitable. Black Friday has long been lauded as the busiest shopping day of the year, but I have my doubts as to whether or not that is always the case. Logic dictates that “the busiest shopping day of the year” would be a moving target, changing annually based on a plethora of circumstances. At any rate, when I was a kid, if memory serves me correctly, there were always the occasional “midnight madness” sales, but the whole thing wasn’t this huge nationwide event. In the past several years the idea has blown up and taken on a life of its own. At first stores would open up at 5 or 6 in the morning. Then it became 3am. Eventually it became the norm for most places to begin the insanity at midnight. And now, in 2012, establishments like Target & K-Mart actually opened up on the evening of Thanksgiving. So Black Friday actually began on Thursday. I grew up in an era when blue laws were still in effect. It wasn’t until I was a teenager that malls and other outlets began opening up on Sunday, so it is hard for me to wrap my head around the idea of anything other than essential services like hospitals & police departments being open for business on a major holiday.

 

Society has been lamenting the commercialization of Christmas for decades. It is even referenced by a character in the classic 1947 holiday film Miracle on 34th Street. And it just keeps getting more appalling every year. Thanksgiving and Christmas used to be their own distinguishable holidays. Then they became connected when the former began being marketed as the official kickoff of the latter. All the sudden instead of two distinct days on the calendar we had an entire, month long holiday season. Personally I’ve never had a huge issue with that because, as I have written here abundantly I love everything about the holidays. I love the lights. I love the movies. I love the food. I love the music. I believe it is alright to enjoy the peripheral accoutrements associated with Christmas as long as we always maintain our focus on the true reason for the season, which is of course the birth of our Lord & Savior Jesus Christ. However, I am a bit disturbed at the direction things have taken in recent years.

 

First of all I am not at all convinced that there is much of a focus on The Lord anymore. Did you know that in the early days of our nation folks used to spend nearly the entire Thanksgiving Day in church?? Of course this isn’t just a holiday problem…it’s a year round issue. It has become quite popular to hate God in America these days. We’ve pushed Him out of nearly every facet of public life and really don’t heed His words much in our personal lives. That is a much bigger topic than I want to go into at the moment, but suffice to say that the whole purpose of Thanksgiving & Christmas is quickly becoming entirely lost in our modern society.

 

Secondly, as much as I love all the ancillary trappings of the holiday season I do think there should be limits. Things have progressed (or regressed, depending on one’s perspective) to the point that stores begin selling Christmas related items, radio stations start playing carols, television airs holiday films, and people decorate their homes as early as October. We definitely gloss over Thanksgiving, and oftentimes begin “celebrating” Christmas even before Halloween!! I do NOT like walking into WalMart or any other retailer and seeing a Christmas tree in October. #22 of my 35 Undeniable Truths of Life is that “It’s always about the money. Always.”, and there is no denying that the Christmas Creep is driven by greed. Look, I get it. I understand that there is very little profit to be made from Thanksgiving outside of turkey & the other various foodstuffs involved and that Christmas has become a huge cottage industry that can make or break the bottom line for a lot of businesses. But I also feel like there are other forces at work.

 

I believe that we are a very unhappy, unfulfilled, unsatisfied society. Political correctness & hatred of God have become inescapably pervasive. One has to be careful about words spoken and actions taken because everyone is so easily offended. The economy is bad and jobs are scarce or inadequate. We try many things to fill the void…alcohol, drugs, sex, gambling, mindless entertainment. So when Christmas rolls around we have developed a habit of jumping the gun. We decorate the house a few weeks sooner, look forward to shopping for our loved ones, and don’t seem to mind the music & movies being played in October. Christmas makes us happy, and we are desperately seeking happiness. I suppose that’s not such a bad thing, but I still think we should tread lightly. It’s human to want what we cannot have. What the Christmas industry has done (and I can’t honestly blame them) is give us what we want. They understand that Rudolph, twinkle lights, wrapping paper, and Bing Crosby put a smile on our face. Christmas is a drug and Best Buy, WalMart, Sears, and all the rest are dealers. The problem with getting high is the inevitable low, which in the case of Christmas Creep is the backlash and desensitization to the magical wonder that is Christmas.

 

It is ironic that this is the time of year when one frequently hears the old maxim that “good things come in small packages”, yet we have taken what was once a couple of very lovely days on the calendar and made them into a stretch of time that lasts more than a quarter of our year. I do not leave the comfort of The Bachelor Palace on Black Friday for a variety of reasons, not the least of which is that a day that involves a sea of humanity isn’t comfortable for a guy who has grown increasingly exasperated by human beings. To paraphrase Popeye’s pal Wimpy, I’ll gladly pay extra next week for an item that you got today for an awesome discount. I sincerely enjoyed my Thanksgiving, and do my best to appreciate the blessings that God has given me. I had a great meal and enjoyed a lovely day with family. I will embrace the Christmas season with my usual verve & childlike delight. But above all else I will continue to give thanks to God, who gave his only begotten Son so that I could have the opportunity to enjoy eternal life. There is nothing wrong with giving (and receiving) gifts, company parties, hoping Ralphie doesn’t shoot his eye out, or roasting chestnuts on an open fire. I just don’t want to wake up one day and end up doing those things in the summer.

 

 

 

Related articles

You Don’t Know What You’ve Got ‘Til It’s Gone: An Ode to Moms

When I was a kid I had a teddy bear. His name was Teddy, because evidently my imagination hadn’t quite kicked in yet. I can’t exactly remember the details, but I think my great Aunt Garnet got him for me when I was about 4 years old. At any rate, Teddy was my constant companion in times of fear, like when a big ol’ thunderstorm would roll in. Yes, I can admit it now…I wasn’t exactly a mini Chuck Norris growing up. I had to have Teddy by my side every night, clutching him in my nightly slumber like the prized possession that he was. Over time his original outfit got all tore up, and all of his little paws got torn off…not due to anything sadistic I did, but just because of wear & tear. Fortunately my Grandma Pigott was a wiz with needle, thread, & a sewing machine, and she performed many a cosmetic surgery on Teddy. I probably kept him a little bit too long (if you know what I’m saying), but eventually the time did come when my smoldering machismo started to kick in and I knew it was no longer cool to sleep with a stuffed animal. I guess the transition wasn’t too traumatic, since it isn’t really etched into my memory like so many other life events. I look back on my time with Teddy and smile, appreciating that small chunk of my childhood…but I can honestly say I don’t yearn deeply to somehow hop in the ol’ DeLorean time machine and bring him back.

 

It is a far different thought process when it comes to my Mom.

 

I’m not a big fan of Mother’s Day, for kind of the same reasons why I loathe Valentine’s Day. VD (ha!!) is a pretty pointless holiday when one is single, and only serves as a gloomy reminder that, for some reason, I am not cool enough, hot enough, or rich enough to satisfy the shallow needs of the average 21st century woman. Similarly, Mother’s Day is a melancholy reminder of what I have lost.

 

Nearly 13 years ago…on a temperate February night…my Mom slipped away. I was living at home at the time, and I still remember it well. The 911 call…my Dad’s worried look…the fire department & paramedics working on her. She held on for a few days in a vegetative state, and what will haunt me for the rest of my life are her eyes, tears flowing, as she apparently understood everything that was happening but couldn’t speak. Mom had a living will and did not want to be kept alive by machines for more than a few days, so eventually my Dad had to make the tough decision to honor her wishes and have her taken off life support. She was 52 years old, but had been in poor health for two decades, including having a lung removed due to lung cancer 5 years earlier. At the end her heart simply wore out. The day we buried her was an unusually sunny, warm day at the end of February. I wrote a letter that was placed in her casket, and I’d like to think she read it once she got settled in up in Heaven.

 

I realize that I was blessed in many ways. I had my mother until I was 27 years old. I got to spend every day of the last five years of her life living in the same home. Since she’d had so many health problems for such a long time there was a tacit understanding that it was unlikely she’d live to be wished a triple digit happy birthday by the weather guy on the Today show, so there was a subconscious preparedness. And most of all I was blessed to have been raised, taught, taken care of, and loved by an amazingly strong, kind, and selfless child of God. I have always said and will continue to say that any positive traits I may occasionally display are entirely due to the way I was raised by my parents.

 

Having said that, I must also concede that every day of the past 12+ years has been…different. The old cliché is that “time heals all wounds”. I’m not sure that is completely true. I sometimes feel…with all due respect to our men & women in uniform…like a soldier that has been wounded, that even though life moves forward and I do what must be done on a daily basis there will always be a scar and a noticeable limp. It’s just that my scar & limp aren’t manifested physically. I do not say that to elicit any sympathy. Not at all. I am forthright for two reasons. First because I know that my feelings aren’t unique. Lots of people have experienced loss. Many many people will “celebrate” this Mother’s Day not by buying a present for or taking out to eat their very much alive mother, but by visiting a gravesite or shedding a tear. Secondly, I wish to give a friendly nudge to those whose mothers are still on this Earth. When my Mom died one of the most overwhelming emotions I experienced was the desire to be able to talk to her just one more time. I could not…still cannot…remember the last thing I said to her. It haunts me, even though I wrote that letter. So if your mother is still around, call her. Visit her. Give her a hug & kiss. Tell her you love her. One certainly cannot go around thinking in morbid terms like “this may be the last time I ever see you”. That’d drive a person nuts. However, I would recommend keeping the thought somewhere in the subconscious. If nothing else it is good motivation to be good to people and not act like a complete idiot.

 

As for Mother’s Day…I try not to let my own gloominess affect others’ appreciation of the event. Mother’s Day was actually founded in my home state of West Virginia, just about a half hour down the road in Grafton, by Anna Jarvis in 1914. Therefore I suppose I should feel a bit of home state pride. And of course the whole idea behind the holiday is splendid. Mothers should be recognized & celebrated for all they do. In 21st century America we have been conditioned by equal rights, women’s’ liberation, and the near economic necessity for two incomes to not revere motherhood as a job in & of itself. But I suspect that if modern mothers would compare notes with their maternal ancestors the conclusion would be that, despite the wonders of technology, amazing advances in medicine, and evolving societal norms, it’s still as tough a gig now as it was then. So kudos to all the mothers, grandmothers, aunts, sisters, etc. out there that have ever raised a child or are in the process of doing so. We live in a world with many pitfalls, temptations, and opportunities to royally screw up. Your child may not grow up to be rich, famous, or successful by the world’s definition, but if you help them navigate the many twists & turns of life without too much collateral damage, instill some good values & morals, and guide them toward being a reasonably productive member of society then I don’t think it is unreasonable to set aside one day a year to say “job well done”.

 

 

 

Related articles

 

Under A Blood Red Sky Nothing Changes On New Year’s Day

On the night of December 31, 2010 I sat at The Bachelor Palace alone…except for Rocco….gently weeping and asking God to send me somebody to relieve the loneliness & lift the gloom. I’ve never told anyone that, and I’m not sure why I have decided to be so revelatory now. Maybe I have finally realized I have nothing at all to lose. It is certainly not to elicit any level of sympathy, but more to illustrate a point.

One year later I did not reach quite the same level of despair, although it was tempting since God had not yet answered my plea. I’ve set aside the emotion and become more contemplative, not only of my situation, but also about the world at large and this thing we call a “new” year.

I have grown to detest New Year’s Eve. There are two kinds of people to whom the event is targeted. The first type is the party animal. We all know these individuals. Some of us have been these individuals. They will happily use any excuse to “go out” and “party”, usually consuming copious amounts of alcohol in the process. Please understand that I am not being critical. Like I said, once upon a time I fit into this category like a glove. Sometimes I wish that I was still a party animal because life would be a lot more fun and much less solitary. The lifestyle of the party animal is also perfect for New Year’s Eve because their charismatic aura usually means they have lots of friends so their phone rings off the hook with invitations to all manner of social gatherings. The second target audience of New Year’s Eve are couples. Whether they are still trying to hang with the 20-somethings at the bar or have evolved into attending a fun little get together with friends complete with finger food and board games, it’s all about being with the one you love…or loving the one you’re with (Where are Crosby, Stills, & Nash when we need them??). And then of course those couples eventually have children so even if they stay in they’re usually doing something fun.

Unfortunately for me I am Choice C…none of the above. I’m single, have no children, don’t really drink or “party”, and even though I feel like I’m a nice person my phone n-e-v-e-r rings and I am never invited to or included in anything. I’m the person that will someday die alone in my apartment and no one will notice for several days until the stench becomes overwhelming. I am invisible and disconnected from society, which to some degree is probably my own fault but is largely a mystery…atleast it is to me. To be honest this relative anonymity doesn’t really bother me most of the time. But on New Year’s Eve it is gut wrenching. I’m not sure why kissing someone at midnight is a tradition…I just know that it is depressing not to have anyone to kiss.

Now once we get past that whole New Year’s Eve thing I’m okay, but I still find the concept of a new year intriguing. After all, January 1st is just some arbitrary day that was decided upon a couple thousand years ago by the Romans. January is named for Janus, the Roman god of gates, doors, and beginnings, of beginnings & endings and transitions. Janus supposedly had two faces…one looking forward and one looking back. Mythology is undoubtedly fascinating, and this story in particular is kind of cool. But let’s be honest…there is usually not one bit of difference between 11:59pm on December 31st and 12:01am on January 1st. There isn’t some bolt of lightning that shoots down from the heavens erasing all our worries, mistakes, & illnesses and magically making our lives perfect. But we do tend to gravitate toward that notion, imagining that magical bolt of cleansing lightning to be real.

Human beings love the idea of redemption. We embrace the thought of starting over with a clean slate. Folks happily latch onto the thought that the next 365 days are going to be better, happier, healthier, and more prosperous than the previous 12 months. Lots of people make resolutions, deciding with dogged determination that now is when they are going to lose weight, quit smoking, learn a new skill, or change some other aspect of their life. They weren’t interested in making such transformations in April, August, or November…but now all the sudden their going to turn over a new leaf because the calendar says January. We eat foods like pork, cabbage, or black-eyed peas (the food, not the horrible “music” group) because we’ve been told they’ll bring us luck, success, and affluence. I don’t know about y’all, but I’ve been eating that stuff every New Year’s Day my entire life and I’m still poor.

Is there anything wrong with the idea of New Year’s and a new beginning?? Not at all. Just because Jesus was almost certainly born nowhere close to December 25 and that date was simply co-opted by the early church to squash the pagan celebration of Saturnalia doesn’t mean that Christmas is bad. On the contrary…celebrating the birth of Christ is a wonderful idea. Similarly, making January 1st a day of renewal & restoration…a kind of rebirth of our lives…isn’t a bad idea at all. But much like Christmas I think maybe we kind of mistreat New Year’s nowadays. The aforementioned resolutions are too often shallow, vain, meaningless, and broken before the calendar turns to February. We love to talk about changing & improving our lives, but we aren’t really very committed to following through. We embrace the hope a new year brings, but abandon that hope as soon as things start to go to hell in a handbasket just like last year.

Maybe a better idea is to treat every single day as a gift from God and an opportunity to be a better person than we were yesterday. Sammy Hagar sings a song called Give to Live that I absolutely love. In the song The Red Rocker gives the following advice: “If you want love you’ve got to give a little. If you want faith just believe a little. If you want peace turn your cheek a little. If you know what you want just go on out and get it. Don’t give up…don’t give up…don’t give up”. I’ll be the first to admit that I’ve been tempted to give up many times, especially on lonesome days like New Year’s Eve when feeling forgotten, overlooked, and taken for granted. But then I remember that every day is New Year’s Day in some way. Oh sure we are going to have bad days. We are going to fail, screw up, not feel well, and come face to face with the abyss. But, as Tom Hanks says in Cast Away (#40 on my Favorite Movies list), we’ve “got to keep breathing because tomorrow the sun will rise and who knows what the tide could bring”. And hey…maybe I’ll have a date next New Year’s Eve!!

The Sammy Claus Wish List 2011

Yes West Virginia, there is a Sammy Claus. I exist as surely as chocolate, fast food, Facebook, & soap operas exist, and I know that they abound and give my life its joy & meaning. Alas! How would The Manofesto exist if there were no Sammy Claus?? It would be really dreary, like being married to a Kardashian or cheering for the 2011 Indianapolis Colts. There would be no Internet then, no high definition television, no cute puppies to make tolerable this existence. We would have no enjoyment, except in sleep & dreams. The eternal light with which bachelorhood fills the Manoverse would be extinguished. Not believe in Sammy Claus?? You might as well not believe in lower taxes & self-reliance!! Nobody sees Sammy Claus, but that doesn’t mean there is no Sammy Claus. The most real things in the world are those that neither Stevie Wonder nor The Who’s Tommy can see. No Sammy Claus?? Thank God I live, and will live forever…or atleast hopefully for another several decades. A thousand years from now, nay, ten times ten thousand years from now, my legacy shall continue to make glad the hearts of bored & lonely web surfers everywhere.

For now though, you’ll just have to settle for the 2011 edition of the Wish List. As always, I yield no authority in making these dreams a reality and just have to hope that The Jolly Old Elf himself checks it out and may see fit to provide folks with the gifts which I am suggesting for them. Enjoy…and God bless us…everyone.

 

 

Detroit Lions DT Ndamukong Suh……….self control

 

 

Regis Philbin……………a very happy retirement

 

 

 

 

 

 

President Barack Hussein Obama………..crushing defeat in November & utter rejection by the American people of radical & destructive leftist philosophy

 

 

The Southeastern United States…….a mild 2012 hurricane & tornado season

 

 

Former Penn St. Assistant Coach

Jerry Sandusky……………….very slippery soap

 

 “Golden Voiced” Ted Williams……..continued sobriety, success, & happiness

 

Fans of The Kardashians………….better role models

 

Iraq………………….peace

 

The Cast of Harry Potter……..continuing relevance & achievement without being typecast or having to resort to desperate moves like hosting a game show or doing softcore porn on Cinemax

 

 

America…………………..more Jesus, less PC Godless liberalism

 

 

Heisman Winner Robert Griffin III…….a pro career more like Vinny Testaverde & Charles Woodson than Danny Wuerffel & Chris Weinke

 

 

My Family & Friends……………health, serenity, & dreams that come true

 

 

Christmas Eve & Christmas Day……………..a balmy 40 degrees with lots of sunshine. White Christmas can remain just a song & a movie.

 

 

My Alter Ego………………..the genuine Christian experience I have been seeking

 

 

New England Patriots Coach Bill Belichick……………………a hoodie

 

 

Amazon.com……………………inspiration for an improved Kindle Fire 2

 

 

Vegas………..my presence in 2012!! You hear that Greg, The Owl, Sealey, & Slack??

 

 

 

 

 

 

I shall wrap up with a quote from the Rankin-Bass animated classic Santa Claus Is Comin’ To Town:

“Lot’s of unhappiness? Maybe so. But doesn’t Santa take a little bit of that unhappiness away? Doesn’t a smile on Christmas morning scratch out a tear cried on a sadder day? Not much maybe. But what would happen if we all tried to be like Santa and learned to give as only he can give –  of ourselves, our talents, our love and our hearts? Maybe we could all learn Santa’s beautiful lesson and maybe there would finally be peace on Earth and good will toward men.”

 

 

 

 

Related articles

 

Holiday Essentials with Your Humble Potentate of Profundity

It goes without saying that Christmas is…or atleast should be…all about the birth of our Lord & Savior Jesus Christ. It should also be christmas-lightsabout family, an attitude of giving, and a time of reflection & contemplation of life. However, I am not here to hop up on my soapbox (not today anyway) or proselytize (not that there is anything wrong with that). There are a lot of cool things about the holiday season, and since I do not have a spouse or children I tend to enjoy a lot of other peripheral traditions besides opening presents on Christmas morning. So these, in a nutshell, are the things that entertain me, make me a bit wistful, and help me fondly recall the idyllic childhood of my selective memory.

 

 

 

 

Santa Claus on the Biography Channel

I’ve railed against the stupefying mediocrity of television elsewhere here at The Manofesto, but I have to admit that amongst the plethora of nothingness that passes as “entertainment” on The Idiot Box there are occasionally some hidden gems. Whenever I am not watching a ballgame on TV I tend to gravitate toward more informational fare on Discovery, History, or The Science Channel. If only I’d have had that sort of intellectual curiosity 30 years ago. Ah well…c’est la vie. At any rate, A&E used to run this terrific show called Biography, which is exactly what it sounds like. A few years ago the show somehow got its own channel, which is probably overkill but what’re you gonna do?? At Christmas time they inevitably run a show about the jolly old elf himself…Saint Nicholas, Santa Claus, Sinterklaas, Father Christmas, etc. They explore the origins, the myths, and how our modern interpretation came to fruition. It’s educational, it’s fun, and it’s not a bad way to spend an hour or two.

 

 

Reading A Visit From St. Nicholas

Unfortunately I do not have children of my own and have begun to have very serious doubts about whether I ever will. If I did I would like to think that one of the final things I would do as they lay their little heads down to sleep on Christmas Eve is read this most beloved poem. As it is I still like to find it online and read it to myself. What a beautifully written story it is, with the power to make even middle-aged men feel like children once again.

 

 

Die Hard

Coming in at #9 on my list of Favorite Movies is the best action movie of all time and the world’s most unlikely Christmas film. It’s a terrific change of pace from the sentimentality and mawkish preachiness of typical holiday fare. Obviously I don’t shy away from all that sweetness & light…not at all. But sometimes it’s fun just to sit back and watch smartass Bruce Willis (at his very best) shoot things and blow stuff up.

 

 

Crazy Christmas Lights

lightsI am physically unable to put up a huge decorative display, and even if I could The Bachelor Palace is not really conducive to that sort of thing anyway. So I can get my fix a couple of ways. If the weather cooperates I can hop in the ol’ gasoline powered extended cab sleigh and traverse local neighborhoods where folks with that funky Christmas spirit have decorated the outside of their own homesteads. The swankier sections of town where the pretty people live are usually the mother lode of ornamental holiday nirvana. It’s not a bad way to spend a chilly December evening. The other, far lazier option is to just hang out on the couch and find The Travel Channel on your television. They frequently replay a couple of specials about people who go all out with their Christmas light presentations. Either way the soft glowing lights (I am partial to white lights) are an essential part of the holiday season.

 

 

Thanksgiving with The Macy’s Parade, Planes, Trains, & Automobiles, and NFL Football

This list is obviously more about Christmas, but sometimes I feel like Thanksgiving gets the short end of the holiday stick. In 21st Century America it is treated as nothing more than the kickoff to the commercialized Christmas season. I am not excessively offended by that, but I also think Thanksgiving deserves some love. It isn’t quite as special these days since my mother and grandparents are gone and I usually go out to eat alone instead of having the old fashioned family feast at home, but I do have my own little checklist for the big day. I still love to watch the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade, even if it does strike me as being a lot hokier now than when I was a kid. Being a huge football fan I appreciate the fact that there are always a couple of NFL games with the Dallas Cowboys & Detroit Lions facing off against various opponents and sometimes there is even a college game or two. And to top everything off I like to watch the 1987 Steve Martin/John Candy classic Planes, Trains, & Automobiles, which is the world’s best…and maybe only…Thanksgiving movie.

 

 

A Holiday Inn & White Christmas Double Feature

I’m an old-fashioned guy, and no time of the year lends itself to kickin’ it old school better than Christmas. One of the things I could never do but would love to have the talent for is singing and dancing. I envy people who can entertain a crowd with song & dance, and that is what these two films are all about. The plots themselves are secondary to watching Bing Crosby, Fred Astaire, Rosemary Clooney, & Danny Kaye display their inimitable talents. It’s such a shame that films like these are not made or barely appreciated anymore. I have two teenage nephews and I’d be surprised if they’d watch either of these for longer than 10 minutes before wanting to play some inane video game or watch “reality” television. That’s fine…to each their own. As for me, I will anxiously await AMC’s showing of these two films, during which I will dim the lights, snuggle with Rocco under a warm blanket, and drink a mug of piping hot cocoa overflowing with marshmallows.

 

 

Santa Claus is Comin’ to Town

Rudolph & Frosty get all the love, but among the plethora of classic, Rankin-Bass produced, stop motion animated holiday specials this one deserves some props as well. Starring the voices of Mickey Rooney, Fred Astaire, & Keenan Wynn, it’s a unique Santa Claus origin story with one of the most memorably named villains ever, Mayor Burgermeister Meisterburger. It’s usually on ABC Family a few times.

 

 

 

Christmas on The Food Network

I am addicted to The Food Network. I can’t actually cook all that well myself, but I sure do get a kick out of watching pros who know their way around a kitchen whip up a plethora of edible delights that look quite tasty on TV. The holiday season provides folks like Bobby Flay, Rachael Ray, Giada De Laurentiis, and Emeril Lagasse several weeks to wow the viewers with all kinds of festive ideas & recipes. Yummo!!

 

 

 

 

Made-for-Television Holiday Movies

We are all familiar with the big screen classics that debuted in the theaters decades ago and now grace our television screens each & Christmas season. However, there are a lot of other lesser known holiday films available for our viewing pleasure every year. Channels like Hallmark, ABC Family, and Lifetime (Television for Women) produce new made-for-TV flicks all the time and replay several that have evidently gotten good ratings. You won’t see many big stars, great production values, or even very good stories, but you’ll be entertained, maybe have a laugh or two, and possibly get your heart tugged on a bit.

 

 

Miracle on 34th St.

This is a fantastic way to kick off the holiday season!! The beginning of the film incorporates the Macy’s Thanksgiving Parade into the story, so it is usually amongst the first Christmas movies I watch. It used to be on NBC immediately following the parade every year, but then they started showing a dog show instead. However, if my sources are correct then NBC is showing it on Thanksgiving this year again!! I know that most of us (unless there are young crumb crunchers out there with an odd addiction to The Manofesto) understand the truth about Santa Claus, but I also think that most of us retain…dare I say…an inner child that we love to bring out during the holidays. Even if we know the real deal with Santa there is something charming about the idea that he may actually exist.

 

 

 

Mannheim Steamroller & Trans-Siberian Orchestra

I love all sorts of music and I really enjoy Christmas carols. I have to give a shout out to my friend Greg and The Godfather of Conservatism Rush Limbaugh for introducing me to these two groups, both of which put a distinctive spin on traditional holiday tunes. They are each a unique mix of orchestral & progressive synthesized music, with TSO having more of a rock edge. Once one is familiar with their singular styles it becomes instantly recognizable when heard on the radio or the sound system at your local shopping center. Both groups have done tunes other than Christmas songs, but it is the latter for which they are best known & loved and that has become an integral part of my yuletide merriment.

 

 

Elf

The new kid on the block in the pantheon of beloved Christmas films is 2003’s Elf, starring Will Ferrell as an orphan who accidentally ends up in Santa’s bag on Christmas Eve and grows up at the North Pole think he is…you guessed it…an elf. He learns the truth and sets out to New York City to find his real father, who just happens to be a grumpy book publisher who is on Santa’s Naughty List. Ferrell is hysterically funny and nails the childlike vibe one may assume would mark an elven personality, and James Caan is the curmudgeonly Dad. This is one of Ferrell’s best roles, and it is amazing just how quickly Elf has taken its place amongst the annual holiday classics. I do have a concern about possible overexposure, because USA Network shows the film a lot starting even before Thanksgiving.

 

 

Christmas Unwrapped on The History Channel

Okay, so I am kind of a nerd. I love history, and I love Christmas, so this is a perfect marriage of the two. It explores the origins of the holiday, various symbols like the Christmas tree, and how the celebration has evolved over the centuries from a strictly holy day to 18th century rabble rousing to the modern bent toward consumerism. There is a lot of interesting input from a variety of experts in history, religion, and folklore, and it is all narrated by the soothing voice of newsman Harry Smith. I don’t mind being educated at the same time as I am being entertained. Your mileage may vary.

 

 

Home Alone & Home Alone 2: Lost in New York

MacCaulay Caulkin seems to have followed the same path as a lot of child stars…overnight fame at a very young age, followed by years of personal & legal issues that were tabloid fodder for the jaded, voyeuristic masses, and eventually relative obscurity. However, for just a little while each holiday season he is simply that precocious and insufferably cute little boy that was inadvertently ditched by his family (twice) and left to fend for himself at Christmas time. The original came in at #12 on my Favorite Movies list, while the sequel ranked #37. I fondly recall watching the original when it first started airing on television in the early 90’s with my oldest nephew (who is now in college). We laughed so hard at the cartoon violence when little Kevin is “defending his house” against bumbling burglars Harry & Marv that tears were streaming down our faces. I don’t laugh quite as much now, but these two films are still virtual comfort food. The second isn’t quite as good as the first, but the two still need to be connected and viewed, preferably together.

 

 

The Ref

If one checks The Vault and peruses my Top 100 Favorite Movies series it becomes obvious that I adore Christmas films. I believe somewhere around a dozen made the cut. Checking in at #28 is The Ref, an overlooked 1994 offering starring Kevin Spacey and Denis Leary. The story revolves around a thief who takes a bickering couple hostage on Christmas Eve and regrets it tremendously since they and their crazy family drive him nuts. For some reason The Ref has never quite entered the well-known pantheon of traditional holiday movies, but I have adored it since the first time I rented the video over 15 years ago. It’s rather difficult to find on TV but well worth the rental.

 

 

Chocolate Chip Cookies, Peanut Butter Balls, Peanut Butter Fudge, Hot Chocolate, Wassail, Eggnog, & Pita Piata

Let’s face it…food is an important part of the Christmas season. Even the most steadfast of dieters throw their weight loss goals aside for the holidays. And depending on cultural influences and what our families prepared when we were kids, we all have our particular favorites. Chocolate chip cookies are great any time of year, but when I was young both my mother and her mother always made a huge batch right after Thanksgiving, enough to last until New Year’s, so chocolate chip cookies always remind me of Christmas. My grandmother also always made a big ol’ turn of fudge and peanut butter balls as well. On my Dad’s side of the family I was introduced to pita piata, and Italian dessert that is basically a nut roll containing brandy soaked raisins amongst a host of other tasty ingredients. Pita piata is native to the small village of San Giovanni i Fiore in Calabria, Italy, where my great grandparents immigrated from at the turn of the 20th century. As far as beverages go, who doesn’t like hot chocolate?? And what drink is as identified with Christmas as eggnog?? You may have also heard the old Christmas carol Here We Come A Wassailing. There is actually a beverage called wassail, and the best way I can describe it is that it tastes like liquid apple pie. We usually enjoy some wassail after the folks from church trek through my small hometown caroling.

 

 

National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation

Firmly entrenched as one of America’s favorite holiday classics is 1989’s third offering in the adventures of the wacky Griswold clan, led by the bumbling stumbling Chevy Chase himself. It’s hard to believe that it’s been over two decades since this one originally hit theaters. As I said when I rated Christmas Vacation #6 on my Favorite Movies list, this isn’t high art. It’s mindless entertainment & harmless fun, and it’s something I look forward to every year.

 

 

 

Reading Charles Dickens’ A Christmas Carol

There is no shortage of movie adaptations of Dickens’ tale about mean old Ebenezer Scrooge who is visited by three ghosts on Christmas Eve and shown the error of his ways. There are a few classic B&W films from the mid-20th century, a “motion capture” animated feature starring Jim Carrey made just a couple years ago, loose interpretations like Bill Murray’s Scrooged or the popular cartoon Mickey’s Christmas Carol, and a particularly well done 90’s TV movie starring Star Trek:TNG’s Patrick Stewart. All of these are perfectly delightful. However, might I suggest the following: On some chilly December evening, take Dickens’ novella off the bookshelf, settle down into a comfortable chair or couch, and read the book!! Last year I discovered a wonderful trick to enhance the experience. The Bachelor Palace doesn’t have a fireplace, but somewhere on the television there is a wonderful channel that is nothing but an endless loop of a roaring, crackling, very peaceful fire. So now I dim the lights (except for what I am going to use to read by), grab a warm beverage, burrow myself under a blanket, and read A Christmas Carol in front of a 40 inch high definition fireplace.

 

 

The Polar Express

While Home Alone has fond memories that I associate with my oldest nephew, The Polar Express hearkens a memory connected to my younger nephew. He was about 7 years old when the movie hit theaters and I decided to take him to see it. I think I was much more enthralled than he was to be honest. 7 year olds have a bit of an issue sitting still for almost two hours. At any rate, I fell in love with this film and my fondness has only grown in the ensuing years. The Polar Express was really the first movie that brought motion capture technology to the forefront, and it is so unique and so different that one is left with an indelible imprint on the brain. It also allows for things like Tom Hanks portraying half dozen different characters, which is pretty cool. When ranking The Polar Express #16 on my Favorite Movies list I referred to it as “whimsical, magical, and hauntingly beautiful” and said that it embodied the indefinable Christmas spirit.  A few years ago I was spending some post-surgery time in my 2nd “skilled” nursing facility in less than 2 years. It was in late November/early December, and after a kind soul hooked me up with a very small television one of the first things I was able to watch was The Polar Express. This particular period of time was amongst the saddest, most depressing of my entire life, and I will always be forever grateful that this fantastic movie helped pull me from the abyss.

 

 

A Charlie Brown Christmas

Not too long ago I read a really interesting biography of Charles Schultz, the creator of the Peanuts comic strip. I was never really a comic book fan, but I always enjoyed the comics in the Sunday paper, and felt a certain kinship with loveable loser Charlie Brown. It wasn’t until I read the Schultz book that I realized all the ups & downs and insecurities in his life and how much they influenced his work, and really began to understand why I always liked Charlie Brown. Several classic animated TV specials were made based on Peanuts, including A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving and It’s The Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown, but at Christmas time there isn’t anything much cooler than A Charlie Brown Christmas. The story has Charlie Brown having a problem finding the Christmas spirit, the main issue being one that isn’t uncommon in Christmas stories…the overt commercialization of the holiday. Eventually he finds what he is looking for with the help of his blanket toting pal Linus, whose simple rendition of the biblical Christmas story found in Luke 2:8-14 is awesome since we live in such a PC world where every effort is made to appease Islam while spitting all over Christianity. Even back in the 60’s when the special was made corporate TV types wanted Schultz to remove the Bible passage, but he absolutely refused. After reading the aforementioned biography and knowing how devout Schultz was I understand why he took such a strong stance, and I have the utmost respect for the man because of it. As with other classic specials that have aired annually for decades, A Charlie Brown Christmas obviously resonates with the viewing public, and it is certainly an important part of my Christmas season.

 

 

The 24/7 Christmas Carol Radio Station

I love Christmas carols. I never ever get tired of them during the holiday season. In the archives here at The Manofesto you can find a two part ditty where I rank my all-time favorite carols. I think there are basically about two dozen carols, but they’ve all been covered by so many artists in every imaginable music genre that it seems like there are hundreds of them. At any rate, the day after Thanksgiving one of the local rock stations on my radio dial begins playing nothing but Christmas music 24 hours/day, and I think it is marvelous. I am sure stations nationwide do something similar. I really only listen to the radio when I am in my truck, and since I don’t travel all that much and have a short commute to work maybe that explains why I don’t tire of the endless caroling. It always kind of makes me sad when the station goes back to playing crappy pop music immediately after midnight on Christmas night.

 

 

Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer & Frosty the Snowman

When something is shown annually on television for nearly 50 years then it has obviously made a significant impression on a whole heck of a lot of people. I am secure enough in my masculinity to proudly proclaim that I look forward to watching these two animated specials each Christmas season. Rudolph is based on the song of the same name, written in 1949 by Johnny Marks, who was inspired by his brother-in-law Robert May’s creation of Rudolph for a Montgomery Ward advertising campaign in 1939. The stop motion animated special began airing in 1964, and I’d venture to guess that the vast majority of the population has watched it hundreds of times. Cowboy Gene Autry recorded Frosty the Snowman in 1950, and after the success of the Rudolph animated special Rankin-Bass took Autry’s song and made it into another stop motion classic in 1969. I’m not quite as fond of Frosty as I am Rudolph because let’s face it…little Karen and Professor Hinkle can’t quite compete with Herbie the Elf, Yukon Cornelius, and my favorites, The Island of Misfit Toys. However, both of these shows are absolute must-see-TV for me during the holidays.

 

 

 

Dr. Seuss’ How the Grinch Stole Christmas

The Grinch utilizes more traditional animation than Rudolph, Frosty, and The Polar Express, but that’s okay. Simplicity can be good too. I’ve always sort of wondered what kind of substances Dr. Seuss may have been imbibing, because I’ve never seen an amalgamation of prose & poetry quite like the turns of phrase that made him famous. The Grinch was first published in 1957, and this holiday classic first started airing in 1966. The Grinch is a character whose disdain for Christmas seems very similar to Charles Dickens’ creation Ebenezer Scrooge, and who is similarly redeemed by a sudden change of heart. I don’t know if Dr. Seuss was inspired by Dickens and just decided to simplify the story for children, but it’s an intriguing theory. There is a powerful moment near the end of the story when, despite The Grinch having stolen all their Christmas trees, presents, and even their food, The Whos down in Whoville arise on Christmas morning and still sing, or make a joyful noise, if you will. It’s such a simple yet potent reminder of what Christmas isn’t. I think we forget that sometimes and need to watch this little cartoon to be reminded.

 

 

24 Hours of A Christmas Story

The older I get the more I embrace the nostalgic impact of Christmas, because really, all of us enjoy feeling like a child again sometimes even if there is a tinge of sadness involved. Nothing embodies this wistfulness quite as well as 1983’s A Christmas Story. It is my #5 Favorite Movie and for most folks under a certain age maybe the most popular holiday movie of all time. In the late 90’s TBS/TNT (it goes back & forth) started running a 24 hour marathon from 8pm on Christmas Eve until 8pm Christmas night. What an awesome idea!! I usually catch parts of the first showing at my aunt’s house after eating our annual family fish fest, then maybe a little more after I get home from church before getting some zzz’s. On Christmas Day I catch glimpses here & there depending on where I am. And I always atleast try to watch the entire last showing, as it kind of puts a melancholy period at the end of what has been a wonderful, month long sentence.

 

 

It’s A Wonderful Life

As mentioned, for most people under a certain age…maybe 30 or 35…A Christmas Story is likely the most beloved holiday film. However, my generation grew up with various television stations showing It’s A Wonderful Life dozens of times during the yuletide season. This created one of two reactions. There was the inevitable backlash, with people beginning to hate the movie because of the endless airings (something that I see happening with atleast 2 or 3 other Christmas classics these days). Or there were people like me that came to love IAWL more & more each year. Unfortunately for us Lifers NBC “rescued” the movie from public domain back in 1993 so now we only get to see it twice a year…usually once in early December and then always on Christmas Eve. It is odd that a movie about suicide would become such a perennial Christmas favorite, but I think the central themes…friendship, family, and realizing that what you have and what your life is ain’t all that bad…really hits home with a lot of people. I know that this is a story that has always resonated deeply for me, and I wouldn’t miss it for the world this and every year.

 

 

 

 

Related articles

Understanding Ebenezer

“As Samuel was offering up the burnt offering, the Philistines drew near to battle against Israel. But the LORD thundered with a loud thunder upon the Philistines that day, and so confused them that they were overcome before Israel. And the men of Israel went out of Mizpah and pursued the Philistines, and drove them back as far as below Beth Car. Then Samuel took a stone and set it up between Mizpah and Shen, and called its name Ebenezer, saying, “Thus far the LORD has helped us.” So the Philistines were subdued, and they did not come anymore into the territory of Israel. And the hand of the LORD was against the Philistines all the days of Samuel.” (1 Samuel 7:10-13)


Ebenezer thus means “stone of help”, which isn’t necessarily vital or even helpful information, just an interesting note to begin a discussion of the holiday season and the undeniable emotional dichotomy it presents.


I had always heard folks say that Christmas is both the happiest and saddest time of the year. I am sure somewhere in the annals of time a well known sage or scribe uttered a memorable quote denoting this, but I cannot tell you that for sure. At any rate, it is something I’ve heard but never really paid much attention to…until now.


I have always loved the Thanksgiving-Christmas-New Year’s holiday corridor. Christmas especially…with its singular music, delicious food, classic movies & TV specials, lovely lights & decorations, and unique vibe has always been my favorite holiday. As a child one is obviously drawn toward the idea of Santa Claus and presents, while adulthood hopefully brings about a deeper appreciation of Christmas as a celebration of the birth of our Lord & Savior Jesus Christ. At least that was my experience anyway. Many of us also have a plethora of traditions, usually family related, that we take for granted as kids then develop a wistful nostalgia for as we grow older. Most people mature & evolve, developing new traditions as life’s many transitions…birth, death, marriage, relocation…occur. But it is in these inevitable transitions that the aforementioned duality develops.


Let me go back to Ebenezer for a moment. That, of course, is the first name of the protagonist Scrooge in Charles Dickens’ A Christmas Carol. I feel confident in assuming most will have read the book or watched the movies and be familiar with the story. Scrooge is a mean, uncaring, greedy miser who hates everything and everyone. But why?? I am not Dr. Phil, Dr. Drew, Dr. Oz, or Dr. Ruth, but I have read the book and know that The Ghost of Christmas Past showed that there were reasons why Scrooge ended up the way he did. It is suggested that his childhood wasn’t the best, that his Dad treated him badly. He did have a sister, Fan, that he loved dearly, but she died as a young woman during childbirth. That probably was the exclamation point that sealed Scrooge’s bitterness. In between these two events we see Scrooge become a businessman obsessed with money, an obsession that cost him the only other person he ever seemed to have loved, a fiancee named Belle.


Now I know that Ebenezer Scrooge is a fictional character. I can separate fantasy from reality. But it seems likely that Dickens based his story and his characters, to a degree, on his real life experiences. And let’s face it…we all know people in our own lives that share atleast a shadow of a trait or two or three with ol’ Scrooge.


As I move steadily along my 30’s on the brink of “middle age” I have struggled mightily to retain my childish enthusiasm for Christmas. I still love the sights and sounds and smells of the season. But I have also developed a deeper understanding of how and why it can also be a very sad time for some, and why there are those that are more like Ebenezer Scrooge than Bob Cratchit.


Those inevitable transitions of life are much kinder to some than others. The most important night of the holiday season when I was a kid was Christmas Eve when we would gather at my grandparents’ home to celebrate what I call The Mano Fish Fest. It is a hybrid version of the Italian-Catholic Feast of the Seven Fishes, modified because for some strange reason my particular branch of the family is not Catholic, I am not sure we’ve ever had 7 types of fish, and there is a lot of other food as well. As my grandparents grew older the celebration moved to my aunt’s house, but for the most part nothing else changed. However, over time things have been transformed significantly. A photo of the big night from 20 years ago versus one from last year will show that several people…my grandfather, my Mom, my maternal grandmother (who was always included even though she was not a Mano), a couple of cousins, and an uncle…have died. My Grandma Mano is now 96 and in poor health. My aunt isn’t all that well herself, and I can foresee the day when the big Fish Fest is a thing of the past, and I have nothing better to do on Christmas Eve than stay at home watching the TBS A Christmas Story marathon. Christmas Day has changed dramatically too. My life, as well as the lives of my father and sister, was forever altered by the death of my mother ten years ago. We decided that we just couldn’t celebrate Christmas at my parents’ house with Mom gone, so we transitioned to my sisters’ home. At the time her two boys were just little tikes and she’d do her best to fix a meal, although it could never live up to the feast Mom always prepared. Now my nephews are teenagers, and they have to spend part of the day with their father and his 2nd wife and family anyway. All my grandparents’ came to our house on Christmas Day when I was a child, so that of course is gone now too. Add to all these changes the fact that I am single and have no children. My friend The Owl and I have had many discussions about how society is dictated by and for married people with children and how single, childless individuals are marginalized and often get lost in the shuffle. It is no one’s fault, and it is not my intention to lay blame at anyone’s feet or expect the world to cry me a river. We all have our issues. My purpose here is simply to point out my increased understanding of the two-sided, happy/sad Christmas coin. And I won’t even go into what a nightmare it is to go shopping this time of year. I haven’t decided if the fact that I used to love that hustle & bustle but now dread going within a mile of the mall in December is more a reflection of my own personality changing or just the growing debasement of society as a whole.


Please do not misunderstand. I am not becoming an acrimonious old misanthrope. I still love Christmas. But I do realize how and why so many find this time of year to be nothing but lonely and sad. I am very fortunate to have what family remains, a roof over my head, a job that enables me to buy a few gifts for my Dad, sister, and nephews, and a church with which I am involved that engages in a lot of Christmas activities (even if half of them get cancelled almost annually when the powers-that-be are repeatedly surprised that it is cold in December). There are so many people who aren’t as fortunate, and that realization helps me overcome my own tendency to gravitate toward melancholy.


I wish I had some sagacious words of wisdom for those whose spirits are pierced with the sharp sword of sorrow this time of year, but unfortunately I am not quite there yet. All I can say is that I can, on some level, understand and empathize, just like I can dislike the type of ill tempered curmudgeon that personifies the Scrooge mentality but can also say with a smidgen of sagacity that I get it, that I see where they are coming from and will keep them in my prayers.

 

 


Related Articles

 

Sammy Claus Wish List 2010

It’s that time of year once again. Your local shopping malls and department stores all have a fat guy in a red suit with a white beard on whose lap the kiddies want to sit so they can lie to him, say they’ve been a good little boy or girl, and receive an overpriced toy on Christmas morning that they’ll be bored with by New Year’s. Well here at The Manofesto we like to get in on the fun too. The rules are a bit different though. First of all, I am only wearing half of the Santa suit. I will let you guess which half. Secondly, no one is currently sitting on my lap, but I am allowing females over the age of 21 to audition for the role of a naughty elf. Call or text me anytime. And unfortunately I wield no real power in getting the following recipients their potential gifts. I can only hope that in between checking his list twice, stalking all the children while they are sleeping AND awake, and stuffing his chubby face with tasty treats the real Santa Claus does a bit of Internet surfing and is a regular reader of this humble website of mine. However if there are any kind souls who would like to bring yours truly some milk & cookies I prefer 1% or skim and am partial to chocolate chip or Oreos. Enjoy.



The People of The Gulf Coast …..continued economic and environmental recovery from the oil spill


Pittsburgh Steelers Linebacker James Harrison…..an increase in salary equal to the amount NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell has screwed him out of this season


Katy Perry…..modesty


The New Incoming Congress…..success in dealing with The Obama Regime and returning America to its Constitutional roots


The Republican Party…..an emergent, fresh, interesting, viable Presidential candidate that believes in core conservative principles


The Hockey Player Who Stole Carrie Underwood From Me…..eternal damnation


The iPad…..a much lower price


Rich Fraudriguez…..Josh Groban’s Greatest Hits


The Minnesota Vikings…..a new stadium


Hardees/Carl’s Jr……the return of roast beef sammiches – please


Miley Cyrus…..grace & caution as she understandably sows her wild oats


The Big East…..a map

The Big 10…..a calculator

The BCS…..a playoff


Larry King…..a happy retirement (but no more wives young enough to be his granddaughter)


Time-Warner Cable…..The NFL Network


Atheists, Non-Believers, Heathens, & Scoffers…..prayer & salvation


The View…..cancellation


People Who Watch Reality TV…..better taste


American Citizens…..job opportunities & lower taxes

American Soldiers…..home



Let me leave you with a quote from the Rankin-Bass animated classic Santa Claus Is Comin’ To Town:

“Lot’s of unhappiness? Maybe so. But doesn’t Santa take a little bit of that unhappiness away? Doesn’t a smile on Christmas morning scratch out a tear cried on a sadder day? Not much maybe. But what would happen if we all tried to be like Santa and learned to give as only he can give: of ourselves, our talents, our love and our hearts? Maybe we could all learn Santa’s beautiful lesson and maybe there would finally be peace on Earth and good will toward men.”


Related Articles

Superfluous 7 – Things I Am Thankful For

I briefly pondered the idea of doing a heartfelt, introspective, profound piece on the history and meaning of Thanksgiving and all the blessings in my life. However, at the moment I am just not feeling the inclination to dive that deep. Anyone who knows me or has read The Manofesto should know that I am not the type of person who takes things for granted. My faith journey has not always been smooth, but I feel like I have drawn closer to God in the last couple of years and continue to experience growth in that aspect of my life. At the same time, if I am being honest, there are things that still drag me down. My Dad has always said that there is a difference between being alone and being lonely, and I feel like I cross the threshold into loneliness all too often these days. I am human, so I do sometimes envy the perceived happiness and success of others. For some reason this has been a bigger issue in 2010 than I can ever remember. I try to get past it, and I understand that there is some reason, some lesson that I am supposed to be learning. At any rate, the following list may seem a bit superficial on some level, and I am approaching it from a fun & lighthearted perspective, but these are things that I truly am thankful that I have in my life. So, as I wish everyone out there in cyberspace a Happy Thanksgiving, please enjoy…..

 

 

 

from the home office in Turkey Scratch, Arkansas…..

 

 

 

The Superfluous 7 Things I Am Thankful For:

 

 

 

7 Football

And I don’t just mean the football that is played on Thanksgiving. After all, those games always include the Detroit Lions and the Dallas Cowboys, and who in their right mind would consider that a blessing?? No, I am talking about the entirety of the college and NFL football seasons. I am specifically a fan of the Pittsburgh Steelers, Marshall Thundering Herd, and West Virginia Mountaineers, but I can watch just about any football game. Whereas baseball is a little too slow paced & plodding and the season far too long, and basketball only gets really interesting when the post-season draws near, football is engaging from the pre-game show until the final zero ticks off the clock and the season is the perfect length. And I find that with baseball I am not the least bit interested unless my Pittsburgh Pirates are playing while I have never really had a favorite NBA team, yet I don’t care who is playing football because I will watch no matter what. I am thankful though that the aforementioned Cowboys and Lions do not play each other on Thanksgiving because that may be a vortex of ineptitude that I could not let myself get sucked into.

 

 

 

6 Facebook

Yes, I said it…I am thankful for Facebook. Am I a bit too addicted?? Probably. Could I be spending my time more wisely?? I suppose. But Facebook has allowed me to reconnect with literally hundreds of people from my past and enables me to easily stay in touch with good friends from various far away locales. It is harmless fun, and at the very least probably a better way to be entertained than watching most of the drivel on television these days.

 

 

 

5 The Manofesto

I don’t want to be self-serving, but I suppose I will for a moment. I am not getting paid to write this blog, and I wouldn’t have the foggiest idea how to make money on it anyway. I suppose one would need to attract advertisers of some sort, and for that to happen there would have to be a fairly sizeable and consistent readership. Maybe one day all that will happen. However, I am not really all that concerned about it at this point in time. I began The Manofesto about a year & a half ago because I felt like I had some things to say and have always been pretty confident in my writing skills. Maybe if I had pursued that career path and been given better guidance by educators and others in my environment my circumstances would be much different today. As it stands though I enjoy writing this stuff more than anyone will ever know. I have no idea how many people come here on a regular basis (I know of one…thanks Don 🙂 ), nor do I know how many people may have read one or two things here & there. Nearly all the comments I receive are spam. Maybe I am writing all this for a smaller audience than you’ll see at a Denny’s at 3am on a Tuesday, and maybe someday that might change. But for now The Manofesto is extremely therapeutic and entertaining for me and I am so very glad for the continuing journey.

 

 

 

4 Rocco

My sister & I had a dog when we were just small tikes. He was a mutt named Rags who eventually went nuts and had to be taken away by the dog catcher. However, in essence he was my father’s dog and I think Dad considered him more of a burden than a pet. As I got older we could not have a dog in the house because of my mother’s health. Then for years I lived in places that didn’t allow pets. One day a few years ago the rules in my building changed and we were allowed to have pets as long as they do not exceed a certain size, which is fine with me because I would not want a huge dog that one day may turn against me and smite me in my sleep. Neither would I want a girlie dog, the kind you see airheads like Paris Hilton carrying in their purse. At some point I fixated on pugs because they are small but tough, manly dogs. I got my chance to get one in the summer of 2008 and I named him Rocco. He & I have had our moments. I made a lot of mistakes in training him mostly because I had no clue what I was doing. But Rocco is absolutely the sweetest, most adorable puppy in the universe. He does not bite, just licks a lot. He licks everything. He loves to eat and sleep, and he loves to snuggle with his Daddy. I suppose Caesar Milan would say that I spoil Rocco and that I assign human, childlike qualities to him instead of maintaining a master/dog relationship. So be it. I don’t have a wife or girlfriend, have no children, and my friends mostly live far away. If that means I treat my dog as a substitute to fill the emptiness in other areas of my life then that is just fine by me.

 

 

 

3 Memories

My good friend The Owl posted a rather wistful, nostalgic status update on his Facebook on Thanksgiving eve. It was an ode to his mother and childhood Thanksgivings of yesteryear. I was reminded of my own mother, who we lost 10 years ago. I fondly recall the Thanksgivings of my own youth. My maternal Grandma lived not too far away but she didn’t drive, so someone always went to fetch her on the day before Thanksgiving. She and Mom would spend the evening getting food prepped, and then would get the turkey in the oven sometime in the wee hours of the late night. By the time I woke up around 7 or 8-ish (probably a bit later in my teen years) the aromas that filled our home were heavenly. I always enjoyed watching the Macy’s Parade, and still do, although now I tend to lean toward mocking the overall cheesiness and kitsch. Football games would come on in the early afternoon, and at some point my paternal grandparents, who lived about a mile up the road, would arrive. By mid-afternoon dinner was ready and it was always awesome. We never had cranberry sauce for some reason, but we had about everything else…turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes & gravy, corn, green beans, rolls. Yum. My Mom always made pumpkin pie, and my Grandma Mano always made chocolate cream pie. After dinner we’d all sit in the living room and shoot the breeze, just enjoying each others’ company. As a child I would mostly just sit there and listen as the adults talked about a variety of things. Families have a certain…rhythm…whenever they talk amongst themselves. A stranger coming into the midst of the conversation probably wouldn’t give a rat’s petoot about the topics being tossed about to & fro, but if you’re in the inner circle you get it. Even kids, who probably don’t understand most of what is being said, have a comfort level with the group. It’s like a cold winter night that all the sudden becomes cozy once one slips under the warmth of a soft blanket. I miss that warmth & comfort, but I will always have the memories. There is a fine line that one must be careful not to cross. Living in the past can be crippling. But to embrace memories of a wondrous time that cannot ever be replicated is okay, and I am thankful that I have those memories to reflect upon.

 

 

 

2 Food

I have spoken elsewhere here at The Manofesto about my “skilled” nursing facility experience. In 2006, at the age of 33, I was a patient at one of those places for six months. During those 6 months I lost 30 pounds. That wasn’t necessarily a bad thing, as I have always been overweight and it was probably a good thing for me to lose those pounds. However, I would not recommend the nursing home weight loss program. Obviously any kind of institutional food is usually not good, but honestly…I can eat hospital food. It is atleast average. But the nursing home food was…well…indescribably bad. I would not have fed that stuff to my worst enemy. Thank God my Dad brought me in food…a Wendy’s cheeseburger, leftovers from his supper, maybe a pizza sometimes…every night and my cousin Robert usually brought me something almost daily. Even then I STILL lost weight. And I wasn’t even exercising. I was literally laying in bed for months. My point is, I learned from that experience to appreciate food. I gained all that weight back and more, and I am currently in the process of trying to lose it, but this time it is my choice. I just know I would feel healthier and better about myself if I shed some pounds. But I will not deny myself completely. I will not starve. I appreciate a good meal (appropriate on Thanksgiving) and sympathize with those who are truly hungry. We live in the greatest, wealthiest nation on Earth. No one in America should ever experience hunger. I am not naïve though…I know it occurs, which is why I am thankful that I always have access to food and usually enjoy whatever I eat.

 

 

 

1 Freedom

The aforementioned “skilled” nursing facility experience encompassed only part of what I refer to as my Unfortunate Incarceration. After I was released from that godforsaken hellhole I was still not healed up, which meant that I spent the next year at home before the medical establishment FINALLY decided I needed surgery, which then took several more months by the time one factors in the hospital stay and post-op healing. All told my Unfortunate Incarceration stole away 2 years of my life. During that time I was not able to do a whole slew of things that most take for granted…grocery shopping, going to the movies, attending church, driving. My life is not exactly glamorous, which is why I self-deprecatingly refer to myself as Mr. Excitement. But I now appreciate the freedom to do those simple things. As a child much of my focus as well as that of my parents was for me to be as self sufficient and independent as possible. I think I did a pretty good job of achieving that goal through most of my adulthood, but for two years I lost that freedom. Having it back has meant the world to me and it is the thing for which I am most thankful.

Related Articles