“Everything I learned I learned from the movies.” –
About a year & a half ago…prompted by a longtime citizen of The Manoverse…we examined my 100 Memorable TV Characters. I knew back then that we’d eventually get around to talking about characters in feature films, but it was an idea that needed to percolate for awhile, and now it’s time to pull the trigger.
Television characters are rather easy to ponder. They come into our living rooms on a weekly basis for 5-10 years (give or take, and then we may watch reruns for decades). We get to know them. Their personalities…quirks, idiosyncrasies, & relationships…grow & evolve. They interact with a number of people in a variety of situations. Over the years they become something akin to imaginary friends, or in the case of villains & anti-heroes people we love to hate. In time such characters make an impact on our lives and become…within their fictional sphere of influence…somewhat legendary.
Conversely, movie characters don’t have the same opportunity to make an impression. Oh sure, we may get to know some over the course of a trilogy or series comprised of multiple films, which undeniably provides such characters with an advantage in rankings like this, but most get one shot to make us remember them. It certainly helps if the movie itself is good and/or popular and becomes the kind of film that people watch over & over again years after its theatrical run, but even then movie characters have much less of a chance to crawl under our skin & make a lasting impression. For example, Harry Potter led eight films encompassing about 20 hours of screen time, while JR Ewing of Dallas was on television for about 357 hours over 14 years. Now I grant you, movie characters have a much bigger canvas. ..$100 million budgets, special effects, & more freedom to do really cool stuff or go to awesome locations television shows just cannot afford. But let’s face it…dozens of expensive films come & go from our local cineplex every year and disappear into the ether, rarely to be seen or spoken of again by the masses. So I submit to you that it takes a lot more than bucket loads of cash or cutting edge technology to make a movie character stand the test of time.
What exactly makes a character memorable?? Well, if I knew the correct answer I’d be pretty wealthy, but I suppose I do have a few opinions.
*It’s all about the writing. A well written character with snappy dialogue is a good jumping off point.
*Let’s not overlook the role of a casting director. I have no idea about the ins & outs of their daily grind, but matching what they read in a script to a performer who can bring those words to life seems like an important piece of the puzzle. Should the part be played by an unknown actor looking for their big break, or is there a beloved big screen icon who’d be perfect for the role?? I am always intrigued by stories written years later about various actors who turned down this or that movie, because it’s really interesting to imagine a different performer playing a character made famous by someone else.
*We cannot look past the costume designer. There is no shortage of fondly remembered movie characters well-known for their signature look, whether it is an accessory they always wear, a uniform they are rarely seen out of, a unique vehicle they drive, or some other visual that becomes an identifier. If kids are dressing up like a movie character at Halloween then someone somewhwere did something right.
*The value of a character’s name cannot be overstated. An Oscar winning actor might give the performance of a lifetime in a movie that makes a bazillion dollars, but if the character is named John Smith or Jennifer Jones they’re behind the proverbial 8-Ball when it comes to being remembered.
*Professional wrestlers play one of two roles…their character is either a babyface (good guy) or a heel (bad guy). Wrestlers want one thing when they perform in front of a crowd…a reaction. Whether a face is getting cheered or a heel is getting booed, as long as the crowd reacts one way or the other it’s all good. The concept is similar with film characters…whether we love them or hate them, cheer for them to overcome the odds or relish in their demise, the key is that moviegoers have some kind of reaction. Indifference is undesirable.
As was the case with TV characters, the fact is that my taste in movies is unique & as limited as anyone else’s, therefore universal agreement on this list is unlikely. There are allegedly great movies that I’ve never seen or didn’t particularly enjoy. You will not see Indiana Jones here because I have never watched one minute of any of those films. Y’all should know by now what kinds of movies I prefer, so don’t expect to see many action heroes or psycho killers from slasher flicks. Another thing you won’t see are characters from Christmas films because Santa Claus & George Bailey received love from me a few years ago.
A couple of things surprised me while working on this project. First of all, I’ve always heard actresses complain about lack of great roles for women, and I’ve got to admit that they may have a point. There are just over a dozen ladies on the list, and a few of those are part of a couple. It is likely that, as a guy, my attention leans in the direction of male roles, but I think there’s more to it than that. Secondly, as big of a sports fan as I am I couldn’t help but notice that only a few characters from treasured sports movies felt worthy of inclusion, which I never would’ve guessed at the outset.
I’ve decided to dive in by giving you just a small sample of what is to come, so we will begin with the first ten names to make the cut.
100 James Bond (various films)
Full disclosure: I have never actually watched any of the two dozen Bond films produced in the past sixty years. However, I feel like I have enough of a grasp of the character’s essence, and that he is a such a significant part of the pop culture zeitgeist that I cannot in good conscience leave him off the list. A British secret agent is a rather epic launchpad, and it doesn’t hurt when guys like Sean Connery, Roger Moore, & Pierce Brosnan bring him to life. Author Ian Fleming was an avid birdwatcher and borrowed the character’s name from a real life ornithologist who was an expert on birds of the Caribbean.
Quotes
“Bond…James Bond”
“A martini…shaken, not stirred”
99 Shooter McGavin (Happy Gilmore)
Golf villains aren’t really a thing, right?? I suppose Caddyshack and some other movies have portrayed country club types as uptight snobs, but that’s usually as far as it goes. Shooter McGavin takes things to a whole new level, albeit in a comedic way. He’s the top pro on the PGA Tour and has zero respect for oddball newcomer Happy Gilmore. A rivalry quickly develops, with Shooter buying the repossessed house of Happy’s grandmother at an auction & hiring a deranged fan to run over Happy with a car.
Quotes
“I eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast!”
98 Catherine Tramell (Basic Instinct)
With a single crossing of her leg Sharon Stone became an overnight sensation. History would prove the actress to be little more than a flash in the pan (pun unavoidable), but coldblooded sexpot Catherine is unforgettable. There was a sequel produced fourteen years later, but it was a box office bomb.
Quotes
“Killing isn’t like smoking. You can quit.”
“I’d have to be pretty stupid to write a book about killing and then kill somebody the way I described it in my book. I’d be announcing myself as the killer. I’m not stupid.”
“I finished my book. Didn’t you hear me? Your character’s dead. Goodbye. What do you want…flowers? I’ll send you an autographed copy.”
97 Lt. Col. Bill Kilgore (Apocalypse Now)
The cast of Apocalypse Now is incomparable. Marlon Brando. Martin Sheen. Dennis Hopper. Harrison Ford. Lawrence Fishburne. GD Spradlin. But in my humble opinion it is Robert Duval’s Kilgore that pops off of the screen.
Quotes
“I love the smell of napalm in the morning. You know, one time we had a hill bombed, for 12 hours. When it was all over, I walked up. We didn’t find one of ’em, not one stinkin’ dink body. The smell, you know that gasoline smell, the whole hill. Smelled like . . . victory. Someday this war’s gonna end.”
96 Joan Crawford (Mommie Dearest)
Joan Crawford was a real life actress in mid-20th century Hollywood, but I think it is a fair assessment that nowadays she is probably best remembered for the memoir written by her adopted daughter Christina that painted Crawford as an alcoholic & an abusive mother. The book was adapted into a film in 1981, with Faye Dunaway in the lead role. I cannot pass judgment on the veracity of what Christina Crawford wrote, but if Joan Crawford was even half as crazy as what is portrayed in the movie it is difficult to imagine growing up in that household. Dunaway won a Golden Raspberry for Worst Actress and made entire generations of people unable to look at wire hangers the same way ever again.
Quotes
“NO… WIRE… HANGERS! What’s wire hangers doing in this closet when I told you NO WIRE HANGERS, EVER?! I work and work ’til I’m half-dead, and I hear people say, ‘She’s getting old.’ And what do I get? A daughter… who cares as much about the beautiful dresses I give her as she cares about me! WHAT’S WIRE HANGERS DOING IN THIS CLOSET?! ANSWER ME! I buy you beautiful dresses, and you treat them like they were some dishrag! You do! $300 dress on a wire hanger?”
95 Alex Forrest (Fatal Attraction)
Well, there may not be enough great roles for women in Hollywood, but as long as the “crazy chick” trope is alive & well they’ll have a few solid opportunities. Alex is the nutjob that Michael Douglas has sex with in an elevator, who then becomes obsessed with him & stalks his family. Ever hear the term “bunny cooker”?? It originated with Fatal Attraction & Alex Forrest.
Quotes
“We were attracted to each other at the party…that was obvious. You’re on your own for the night…that’s also obvious. We’re two adults.”
“Well, what am I supposed to do? You won’t answer my calls, you change your number. I mean, I’m not gonna be ignored, Dan!”
94 Napoleon Dynamite (Napoleon Dynamite)
Perhaps I’m too old, or maybe just obtuse, but I don’t really get this movie. Having said that, the titular character as portrayed by Jon Heder is so…unique…that he does make me chuckle, and he has a few quotable scenes that have withstood the relentless march of time.
Quotes
“Sorry I’m late. I just got done taming a wild honeymoon stallion for you guys.”
” I caught you a delicious bass.”
“Pedro offers you his protection.”
93 The Hanson Brothers (Slapshot)
Paul Newman may be the star of Slapshot, but three dimwitted hockey goons steal the show. The plot centers around a minor league team on the verge of folding, so an idea is hatched to put all that winning & losing stuff aside and focus on entertaining the crowd with violence. Enter the fierce trio with shoulder length hair & horn-rimmed glasses. Their “look” contrasted with the aggression they display on the ice and their childish demeanor off the ice is an amusing blend, and I think it helps that the young men portraying the characters were real hockey players, and more importantly not professional actors.
Quotes
“Hey ya think they show Speed Racer here?”
92 Max Goldman & John Gustafson (Grumpy/Grumpier Old Men)
Walter Matthau & Jack Lemmon famously brought Neil Simon’s Odd Couple duo of Oscar Madison & Felix Unger to the big screen in 1968, but a quarter century later they reunited as two old codgers in the frozen tundra of Minnesota who have been frienemies since childhood. Max & John insult each other, play ultimately benign pranks, & have similar taste in women. It’s delightful family fun, and one can’t help but like these guys.
Quotes
“Hypothermia’s a bitch. It ain’t quick like a stroke.” (Max)
“Morning, dickhead.” (Max) “Hello, moron.” (John)
“If my dog was as ugly as you, I’d shave his ass and teach him to walk backwards.” (Max)
“I am the gangster of love” (Max) “Gangster, huh? So tell me, was it more of a hold up than a stick up?” (John)
91 Peter Gibbons & Bill Lumbergh (Office Space)
A shoutout to my former colleague Brad, who introduced me to Office Space a year or two after its fairly uneventful & mostly unprofitable theatrical release. The movie is populated with colorful characters, but two stand out. Anyone who has ever had a mundane, soul sucking, white collar job can identify with Peter, a guy who is drowning in misery until a session with a hypnotist goes awry, leaving him with the newly tranquil philosophy “it’s not that I’m lazy…it’s that I just don’t care”. Lumbergh is how many people perceive their boss…mostly oblivious, slightly dense, & completely unappreciative, focused solely on forcing underpaid employees to sacrifice their lives for the company. Obviously the movie is satire…most employees aren’t quite as despondent as Peter, and most supervisors aren’t a total dufus like Lumbergh. However, I believe that a big reason that Office Space found new life on home video and became a “cult classic” is that there are strains of truth running thru the film, and we see a bit of our own professional lives reflected in such a way that we get a good laugh out of it.
Quotes
“Human beings were not meant to sit in little cubicles staring at computer screens all day, filling out useless forms and listening to eight different bosses drone on about mission statements!” (Peter)
“Ah, ah, I almost forgot… I’m also going to need you to go ahead and come in on Sunday, too. We, uhhh, lost some people this week and we sorta need to play catch-up. Mmmmmkay? Thaaaaaanks.” (Lumbergh)
“I did absolutely nothing and it was everything I thought it could be.” (Peter)
“If you could do that, that would be great.” (Lumbergh)
“I was sitting in my cubicle today, and I realized, ever since I started working, every single day of my life has been worse than the day before it. So that means that every single day that you see me, that’s on the worst day of my life.” (Peter)
“I’d say in a given week I probably only do about fifteen minutes of real, actual, work.” (Peter)
“Oooo…yeahhhh, ummm…I’m gonna have to go ahead and sort of disagree with you there. Yeah, uh, he’s been real flaky lately, and I’m just not sure that he’s the caliber person that we would want for upper management. He’s also been having some problems with his TPS reports.” (Lumbergh)
“That’s my only real motivation is not to be hassled, that and the fear of losing my job. But you know Bob, that will only make someone work just hard enough not to get fired.” (Peter)
That’s all you get for now!! We’ll be back soon with the next installment of our countdown.
Greetings friends. No, I didn’t forget. With the holiday season in full swing and football reaching a fever pitch on all levels I suppose I’ve been a bit distracted, but it’s time to get back to 
In the early rounds of 
After receiving a first round bye Forrest Gump got past Presumed Innocent in Round 2 in a contrast of two films based on novels. As good as Presumed Innocent the movie is the book is way better. Conversely, I’ve heard mixed reviews of Forrest Gump the book, to the point that I’m afraid to read it and have it ruin my feelings about the movie. The book’s author actually wrote a sequel called Gump & Co., but thus far it hasn’t been translated to film and it probably won’t be, especially since Tom Hanks has expressed misgivings about portraying the title character again. My affection for Forrest Gump is such that I am amazed that it isn’t universally loved, but there are detractors out there. It’s 72% Rotten Tomatoes score is good, but nowhere near some other films in the competition that have ratings of 90% or more. Some folks think it is manipulative, overly sentimental, tiresome, & not as historically accurate as it could’ve been. There is no shortage of people who believe that Pulp Fiction or The Shawshank Redemption should’ve won the Academy Award for Best Picture as well as the Oscars for Best Actor & Best Director. I disagree with all of that. Even my father loves Forrest Gump, and trust me…Dad & I rarely share similar tastes in entertainment. Die Hard: With a Vengeance wouldn’t even be in this competition if it had 
been the final Die Hard film since trilogies are disqualified. Alas, two additional (subpar) movies were made in the series with one last hurrah allegedly on the way, so Vengeance gets its well-deserved kudos. The difference between this third entry and its predecessor…1990’s Die Hard 2…is the addition of Samuel L. Jackson as Detective McClane’s reluctant sidekick. It was Jackson’s follow-up to Pulp Fiction and immediately preceded his role in A Time to Kill, meaning he was on a pretty good roll at the time. The filmmakers knew they had to mix things up in the third film because Die Hard 2 was a fairly tepid rehash of the original premise. Jackson breathes new life into the story, injecting additional humor & attitude. He & Bruce Willis play off of each other quite well.
This is a tough one. I love The Wedding Singer because of its many nods to 80’s pop culture that stir up memories of my long lost youth. The soundtrack is fantastic, with songs from the likes of Culture Club, The Police, Elvis Costello, The Thompson Twins, Billy Idol (who also has a fun cameo in the movie), Spandau Ballet, Hall & Oates, The Cure, Kool & The Gang, Bruce Springsteen, and a few others. That’s quite a lineup. I also want to give a nod to brief appearances by Jon Lovitz & Steve Buschemi. I normally find Lovitz unamusing and mostly dreadful, but his scene in The Wedding Singer is actually quite entertaining. I’m kind of surprised that someone didn’t come up with the idea of a sequel starring Buschemi & Lovitz as new wedding singers. It is my understanding that the film was adapted into a stage musical (kind of a reverse Rock of Ages situation), and I must say that I’d totally go see that show. The Fugitive got past Joe Versus the Volcano in Round 2, which broke my heart because I feel like JVtV is a profound & underappreciated gem. Conversely, appreciation abounds for The Fugitive, with a damn near perfect 96% score from the critics and seven Oscar nominations. I’ve watched The Fugitive countless times, but there is a 
scene in which Dr. Kimble finds himself in the stairwell of a huge building facing off against Lt. Gerard before narrowly escaping thru downtown Chicago’s St. Patrick’s Day Parade, and no matter how many times I’ve seen it I still feel a palpable sense of drama and tension. Actually there are a few scenes like that, and when a filmmaker can still make the viewer buy into the suspense even when we’ve seen it a bunch of times and know exactly what’s going to happen…well folks, that’s what I call great entertainment.
Back to back Sandler…which nowadays would be a cringe worthy waste of time, but two decades ago that wasn’t the case. Unlike The Wedding Singer, which is a more subdued & pleasant performance, Billy Madison is full on Sandler being Sandler, playing the kind of infantile ne’er-do-well that has largely defined peoples’ perception of him as an actor. This film & Happy Gilmore will always be the first two things that pop into the average cinephile’s mind when Sandler is the topic of conversation, and I don’t think that’s such a terrible thing. Fans of The West Wing will appreciate Bradley Whitford’s appearance as devious businessman Eric, Billy’s nemesis. 
There’s a 
and morticians & undertakers, and these two movies could merit a similar appraisal. Both are amiable comedies that did well enough to spawn affable sequels. Both star older comedic actors instead of hot young Hollywood flavors of the month. Both did surprisingly well at the box office, while critics liked but didn’t love both films. I absolutely adore both films and will watch them whenever they’re on television, and sometimes I’ll stream one or the other when I’m bored & in the mood for a good flick. These are what I call comfort food movies. They warm the cockles and make me smile, which is all I really need a movie to do.
Welcome back to Round 2 of 90’s Film Frenzy!! We went thru the 
trip through the baby-boom era turns out, on closer inspection, to be a dark and driven work, haunted by violence, cruelty, & a sense of the tragically absurd” but goes on to say that “where most American movies of the ’90s strike a single note over & over, Forrest Gump is a symphony” that is “an original and deeply moving experience”. People Magazine thought it a “plodding, heavy-handed parable”, while Rolling Stone called it a “heart-breaker of oddball wit & startling grace” and our old pal Ebert simply referred to it as “a magical movie”. Presumed Innocent got past Honeymoon in Vegas in Round 1 because an 87% Rotten Tomatoes score is pretty hard to overlook and I really loved the book back in the day. Harrison Ford is a tremendously talented actor that shouldn’t be pigeonholed as Han Solo, Jack Ryan, or Indiana Jones. Some of his best work has been in films that didn’t get any sequels.
Hey…more Harrison Ford!! Back in the mid-60’s ABC aired four seasons of a drama about a doctor wrongly convicted of murdering his wife and his vagabond lifestyle as he eluded law enforcement while searching for the one-armed man that he claimed was the real killer. Dr. Richard Kimble would move from town to town under an assumed name, work at various menial jobs, and inevitably risk being caught to help someone in need. The 1967 series finale was the most watched television show in history until the 1980 episode of Dallas during which the answer to the question “Who shot J.R.??” is revealed. The Fugitive aired on television long before I was a gleam in my Daddy’s eye, but at some point in the 80’s one channel or another began showing reruns and I was hooked. The big screen adaptation condenses the time frame and changes a few minor details, but retains the spirit of the original premise. It was the third highest grossing film of 1993, has a stellar 96% rating on Rotten Tomatoes, and was nominated for seven Academy Awards, though the only one it took home was Best Supporting Actor for Tommy Lee Jones. Best Picture went to Schindler’s List, which is exactly the kind of thing one would expect from the Oscars, while Jones beat out Leonardo DiCaprio (What’s Eating Gilbert Grape?) and John Malkovich (In the Line of Fire) for his award. Joe Versus the Volcano benefitted from a total cop out from Yours Truly in Round 1, tying Hook and therefore moving 
forward in the competition. Here’s the thing about JVtV…if you watch it as if it is just a silly rom-com it’ll be slightly weird, mostly enjoyable, but ultimately forgettable. However, if you recognize the symbolism, value the metaphor, and truly grasp the existential subtext it will blow your freakin’ mind. I kinda sorta understood it on my own, but there is 
Adam Sandler was a cast member on Saturday Night Live for the first half of the 1990s. He had bit parts in barely notable films like Shakes the Clown, Airheads, & Mixed Nuts while he was also doing SNL, but immediately following his departure from television he hit the ground running with Billy Madison, the story of a lazy & dim-witted 20-something coasting thru life in a state of arrested development and living off of his father’s hard earned wealth. When dear old Dad decides that one of his staff members would be more equipped to take over his business someday Billy objects, only to find out that the reason he made it thru grade school, middle school, & high school was because his father bribed teachers to pass him. Billy convinces his father to change his plan of succession on the condition that the young man complete twelve grades of school within six months. Hilarity ensues. Yes it is a bizarre & inane premise. Yes the critics hated it (46% on Rotten Tomatoes). Your 75 year old father probably doesn’t get it, and most teenagers won’t either, 
because Billy Madison is a very specific film for a smallish target audience. But more than two decades later those of us that got a chuckle out of Sandler’s antics back then are still watching Billy Madison now. It was the 65th highest grossing film of 1995, but a lot of movies that made more money that year…Major Payne, Rob Roy, Judge Dredd, Man of the House, The Net, Sabrina, Outbreak…have been forgotten, while television continues to air Billy Madison and people continue to watch. The American President slipped past Boogie Nights in Round 1 because I just can’t wrap my mind around a drama about the porn industry, and because it eventually sparked a greater legacy called The West Wing, one of the finest television shows of the past quarter century. Michael Douglas is an underrated actor and Annette Bening can be compelling in the right role. They both shine in lighthearted fare that allows them to smile & laugh.
Jack Lemmon & Walter Matthau starred in eleven movies together, the most famous of which is probably 1968’s The Odd Couple, an adaptation of Neil Simon’s stage play from a few years earlier. The play & film would eventually find its way to television in a series starring Tony Randall & Jack Klugman that ran thru the first half of the 1970s. Nearly three decades after their greatest success together the pair reunited in this charming comedy about two old geezers fighting over a woman. John Gustafson & Max Goldman are next door neighbors in the frozen tundra of Wabasha, MN. They spend their days fishing, drinking beer, watching TV, and insulting one other. We learn that they’ve known each other all of their lives but battled it out over a woman named Mae decades ago. Mae apparently chose John, but was unfaithful and eventually divorced him. Max ended up with a better woman (now deceased), but still harbors resentment over the one that got away. When a new lady moves in across the street…beautiful, slightly younger, & full of the spirit that Max & John lost long ago…the old rivalry finds new life. Grumpy Old Men was the 14th highest grossing film of 1993, ahead of Cool Runnings and Demolition Man but behind Free Willy and The Pelican Brief. Rotten Tomatoes gives it a score of 62%, with the NY Times cautioning “don’t expect their bickering to be on the level of Neil Simon and you won’t be disappointed”, Ebert calling it “too pat and practiced to really be convincing”, the Washington Post advising that “if you poke through the cheap sentimentality you’ll find a worthy picture somewhere”, and Entertainment Weekly observing that “the shallow pratfalls hide richly funny observations”. Mr. Saturday Night upset 
Scream in the first round because horror movies just don’t frost my cupcake. If Billy Crystal were an employee at an average 9-5 business his boss would describe him as solid, dependable, trustworthy, & proficient. In Hollywood terms that means that he’s rarely brought up in discussions about the biggest, hottest, most talented top box office stars, but he has carved out a nice career that’s lasted several decades and produced some quality entertainment. Mr. Saturday Night is unlikely to appeal to anyone younger than 35, which obviously has a negative impact on the kinds of numbers that Hollywood deems important. If it were made today instead of 25 years ago it might be direct-to-video or more likely an original production of Netflix or Hulu, which would be fine. That’s the world we live in, right?? As a writer I recognize the movie’s flaws but also have to give kudos to some outstanding performances. Crystal is known to be a big baseball fan, and in that sport’s parlance I’ll call this movie a single stretched into a double thru good base running, but there is no one on base, two outs, and the next batter strikes out, rendering the previous play somewhat futile.
See, I told you!! Billy Crystal is still in it to win it dawg!! City Slickers got past Hocus Pocus in Round 1 because who can deny the trifecta of an Academy Award, Crystal, and a 90% score from the critics?? Comedy is tricky. We like to divide everything into categories and stack things into neat little piles, but there are so many different kinds of comedy. When it comes to movies there are some that are just a jumbled mess that can’t decide what they are or the idea they are trying to convey. To my understanding the reason for that is oftentimes because so many writers, producers, directors, actors, & suits have tampered with the product in pre-production that by the time we see it on the big screen it’s like consuming a dish that dozens of cooks have had a hand in making without really communicating with one another, to the point that no one knows what the hell we’re eating. Conversely, great films have been infused with different flavors that are expertly blended, resulting in a pleasurable outcome. City Slickers is a cut above so many of the idiotic comedies that seem to find their way to our local cineplex in the 21st century. It actually has a point, with well-written characters that develop thru the story. None of the actors are the kind of popular hot commodities that seem to be in a different movie every other month, but the performances are tremendous and the cast gels together nicely. A sequel…called City Slickers II: The Legend of Curly’s Gold…was made a few years later, but the magic was gone, and it didn’t help that Jon Lovitz joined the cast. Lovitz ruins everything. Father of the Bride is a remake of a 1950 film starring Spencer Tracy and Elizabeth Taylor. Steve Martin plays the beleaguered father of a 20-something daughter who has just announced her engagement. Despite 
Dad’s dreams of a simple backyard BBQ wedding the bride-to-be and her mother have a different idea and hire a hilariously weird wedding planner. Dad’s a cheapskate who isn’t emotionally ready to let his little girl go, so the whole process is torturous & expensive for him, but everything works out just fine in the end. FotB was 9th highest grossing film of 1991 and has a solid 71% score on Rotten Tomatoes. In comparing the remake to the original the NY Times said “the material has been successfully refurbished with new jokes and new attitudes”. Ebert called it “a movie with heart” with “little moments in it when Martin is deeply moved”. Entertainment Weekly liked the “feel-good finale’, but wasn’t overly impressed by “the pat, amiable, and rather dawdling farce that preceded it”.
Office Space is the very definition of a cult classic. No one paid attention to it in theaters. It ranked 121st at the box office in 1999. 121st!! Something called The Adventures of Elmo in Grouchland made more money. I knew nothing about it until 3 or 4 years later when a co-worker kept quoting it and told me how awesome it is. At the time he & I both worked at a place strikingly similar to the business depicted in the film. Actually I think anyone who has ever worked in any kind of office can see similarities between their reality and what we see onscreen, which is a huge reason Office Space became such a big hit on home video. The cast is filled with character actors that have never done much beyond supporting roles on both television & film, with the lone exception being Jennifer Aniston. In 1999 she was halfway thru her run as Rachel on Friends, and I guess she was supposed to help Office Space make money, but her role is smallish and not at all why people love the movie. Rotten Tomatoes gives it a 79% score, though most of those reviews were done in hindsight, long after it had gained traction and gained popularity. I’m going to go out on a limb and assume that very few critics even bothered to watch it or write a review back in 1999. The Washington Post called it “a knowing, somewhat slight, often hilarious sendup of cubicle culture” that “exploits the yuks in the chronic misery of those routinely exposed to the monotonous gray of corporate minds and company décor”. Variety said it is “frequently uproarious”, Ebert observed that “movie’s dialogue is smart”, and the Village Voice dubbed it “a surprisingly good-natured comedy about the suppressed rage and paranoia of 
unappreciated employees”. As a perpetually underappreciated employee I must agree. Hook benefitted from a first round cop-out tie from me, though with a cast that includes Robin Williams, Dustin Hoffman, & Julia Roberts, all directed by Steven Spielberg, one would think it shouldn’t have to rely on such benevolence. I’ve told this story before, but I fondly recall seeing Hook in an old historic theater in downtown Huntington, WV. I was with a few of my fraternity brothers and we were the only people there, which began my lifelong affection for an essentially empty theater versus being in a crowded one. At any rate, that memorable viewing experience combined with my fondness for Williams has combined to elevate Hook a bit higher in my heart & mind than it probably deserves.
When did I become old enough that the 1980’s could be deemed proper fodder for nostalgia?? Apparently the answer to that question is 1998. Sandler followed-up his successful hits Billy Madison and Happy Gilmore with a story about Robbie Hart, an aspiring musician who lives with his sister & her family in New Jersey. Robbie’s dreams of becoming a rock star seem to have faded as he has settled into an apathetic existence as the leader of a cover band that performs at weddings, birthday parties, & bar mitzvahs. His girlfriend has grown weary of this lack of vision & ambition and ditches him at the altar on their wedding day. Robbie has a hilarious yet pitiful breakdown, but the clouds begin to lift when he meets Julia, a waitress at the catering hall where he often performs. If rom-coms were sports teams Sandler & Barrymore would be great backups coming off the bench behind starters Tom Hanks & Meg Ryan. They’ve done three movies together and this first collaboration is the best. It was the 24th highest grossing film of 1998 (behind Shakespeare in Love but ahead of Halloween: H2O) and holds a 68% score on Rotten Tomatoes. The L.A. Times glowingly called it “a sparkling romantic comedy…the kind that glides by so gracefully & unpretentiously that it’s only upon reflection that you realize how much skill, caring, and good judgment had to have gone into its making”, while Ebert opined that “one of the sad byproducts of the dumbing-down of America is that we’re now forced to witness the goofy plots of the 1930s played sincerely, as if they were really deep”. I’m not really sure exactly what that means, but it makes me wonder what Roger Ebert…who died in 
2013…would think of some of the absolute crapfests that besmirch theaters these days, because The Wedding Singer is Citizen Kane in comparison to many of them. Edward Scissorhands got past Mallrats in Round 1 because I just don’t understand what the big deal is about Kevin Smith. It’s hard to categorize Edward Scissorhands, but I think that’s part of its charm. It appeals to different people for various reasons, and all of those perspectives are valid. The film is visually stunning, with the fascinating contrast between Edward’s gothic existence and the colorful 50’s vibe of the human neighborhood he is brought to, and as a person with a disability who has oftentimes found it challenging to fit into “normal” society I appreciate that theme. Burton squashed the idea of a sequel a few years ago, and one can only hope he doesn’t ever let anyone do a stupid remake.
Bruce Willis has now made five Die Hard films, with one final swan song allegedly on the way (reportedly a prequel). I don’t think it’s possible to surpass the first one, but Vengeance gives it a heck of a try. Seven years after the dramatic Christmas party at Nakatomi Plaza and five years after another memorable yuletide at an airport Detective John McClane is again estranged from his wife, suspended from the NYPD, and apparently an alcoholic. But then a terrorist threatens to blow up a school and specifically requests McClane’s involvement in the case, which involves a cat & mouse game of solving riddles throughout The Big Apple. McClane’s impromptu partner this time is a Harlem store owner named Zeus, who inadvertently gets pulled into the action. The criminal turns out to be the brother of the bad guy from the first film, and there is a similar twist as far as what his motives are. Jackson was a welcome addition to the franchise and breathes a lot of life into the story. Vengeance was the tenth highest grossing film of 1995 but holds an unimpressive 52% rating on Rotten Tomatoes. Variety said that it “degenerates into an improbable & confusing series of chases and an overly involved heist that takes far too long to set up”, Rolling Stone called it “a tense, terrifically funny action dazzler”, Ebert referred to it as “a wind-up action toy…cleverly made and delivered with high energy”, and 
Entertainment Weekly thought it was “a more racially charged Lethal Weapon”, opining that the mad bomber “toys with McClane like a villain on the old Batman TV series”. Twister easily beat Very Bad Things in Round 1 but now faces a stiffer challenge. Time Magazine harshly observed that “you know a movie is in trouble when a cow provides its only moment of authentic human interest”. Variety said that the movie “conveys the overwhelming impression of a mechanical entertainment, a very high concept in which the characters and their problems seem like utterly arbitrary creations”. The NY Times thought that “science aside… it works as escapism even if you do know enough to come in out of the rain”. Goodfellas is a mob movie far different from anything we saw in The Godfather films. Based on the story of real life mobster Henry Hill, Goodfellas is a grittier and less cinematic story than The Godfather, but I suspect that it’s a more accurate portrayal of mob life. The cast is first rate, and the movie was nominated for a half dozen Academy Awards, including Best Picture and Best Director. However, the only Oscar it took home was Best Supporting 
Actor for Pesci. Goodfellas was the 26th highest grossing film of 1990, behind Problem Child, Days of Thunder, and the much maligned Godfather Part III, but ahead of Rocky V, Predator 2, and Ernest Goes to Jail. It has a near perfect Rotten Tomatoes score of 96%. The NY Daily News said that “Scorsese succeeds in smashing all the foolishly romantic myths about the mob with this shocking, vigorously honest portrait”, Rolling Stone observed that it “bristles with violent passion, howitzer wit, and virtuoso style”, and Variety dissented from the majority by calling it “colorful but dramatically unsatisfying”. Our buddy Ebert didn’t hold back when he said that “no finer film has ever been made about organized crime…not even The Godfather”, which is where I have to draw the line. I have no doubt that Goodfellas is more authentic, but Variety hit the nail on the head by calling it dramatically unsatisfying. The old saying is that truth is stranger than fiction…but is it more entertaining?? I don’t think so.
outliers, and due to my well-established tastes & preferences I gravitated toward those. In compiling the list of participants for this competition I realized that, though there aren’t as many films here that we’ve all watched dozens of times flipping thru channels on a lazy day, in comparison with my favorites from the 1980’s this is an overall deeper, more eclectic, steadier field. These movies have probably aged better and don’t seem quite as amusingly nostalgic as those produced in my youth. Whereas 80’s films oftentimes have an idiosyncratic vibe, distinctive music, & unmistakable style, 90’s films don’t really fit into any sort of niche. They’re all over the map, appealing to a wide variety of entertainment palates, possibly at the cost of not being beloved by as many people.
As with previous projects this competition has a few rules. As always…no trilogies. This means that some pretty great movies…most notably the Toy Story films and the Austin Powers films…are excluded. Secondly…no sports films. We talked about my 
The Manofesto 