The Island of Misfit Blog Posts

The place to find stuff that doesn’t really fit any particular category.

The 2014 Sammy Awards – Part II

SammyAwardWelcome to Part 2 of the 2014 Sammy Awards. Please take a moment to check out Part 1 if you have not already done so.

 

 

 

 

After another brief song & dance by our host Billy Crystal it is time to present our next award. Please welcome an old-fashioned yet still moderately amusing leno tuxcomedian that NBC helped make disappear almost a year ago. Give a warm welcome for the former host of The Tonight Show…Jay Leno!! And the nominees are:

 

 

The DB Cooper Award (For the Person Who Most Needs to Disappear)

 

 

Justin Bieber
I keep nominating him but he just won’t go away. But now not only is Bieber an affront to those with good taste in music, but he has evolved into a menace to society off stage as well. Last January he was arrested for a DUI because he was gooned on pot & pills. Last summer he was charged with vandalism after throwing eggs at a neighbor’s house (what is this guy…8 years old??). Then in September Bieber was arrested in Canada for reckless driving & assault. At this point even Lindsay Lohan is probably like “Dude…chill out. Lay off the booze & drugs. Act like an adult.”

 

 

Carter Bays & Craig Thomas
Bays & Thomas are the creators & executive producers of How I Met Your Mother, which was a pretty great show. Atleast it was good right up until these idiots ruined the ENTIRE series during one final episode. More on that later, but for now I’ll just say that karma is…not very nice. The duo created a spinoff show called How I Met Your Dad, which I had already decided I wouldn’t bother with since I was so disappointed with the HIMYM finale. However, it seems as if the show isn’t going to make it on the air at all. You reap what you sow…morons.

 

 

Debbie Wasserman-Schultz
This “lady” is the chairperson of the Democratic National Committee and…frighteningly enough…a U.S. Congresswoman. The problem is that she is an idiot. I will not rehash her stupidity because I realize that a majority of The Manoverse doesn’t care. Suffice to say that almost every time Ms. Schultz (I don’t do obnoxious hyphenated surnames) appears on TV she embarrasses herself, her constituency, & her party. Surely the Democrats can do better.

 

 

Mayor Rob Ford
It’s unfortunate that comedic actor Chris Farley died in 1997 because he would be the perfect choice to play Mayor Ford in an SNL skit or maybe even a parody film. Ford is the former mayor of Toronto (that’s in Canada for those who are spending their first day out of the holler at The Sammy Awards) and is an admitted crackhead & boozehound. Late night TV hosts have had a field day the past few years poking fun at Ford, who still retains a seat on Toronto’s city council. The jokes are funny, but it is kind of sad that such a lost soul can be elected to political office in the 21st century.

 

 

The Duggar Family
We were first introduced to the Duggar family back in 2008 as a part of some stupid reality show. I’ve never watched it, but apparently the hook is that these people have 19 kids. I don’t even want to know why anyone would subject themselves to that kind of insanity. Anyway, I guess a few of the kids have grown up now and are dating and even married. Again…I don’t care, but I suppose someone out there does because we hear about it every time someone in this family makes a move, no matter how insignificant it may be (hint…it’s always insignificant). I am tired of hearing about what they watch or don’t watch on TV, what kind of clothes they will or won’t wear, & all about their sexual morality. Look, I am glad that they are servants of the Lord. Their beliefs are just dandy, but the world doesn’t need to be informed about everything that’s going on in their lives. I despise reality television and am a little suspicious of anyone who would sign up for that kind of gig. In light of their stated religious faith it seems a bit duplicitous.

 

 

Selena Gomez
Is she still dating Bieber?? Who knows & who cares. Anyone with that kind of poor taste in men needs help. Plus she isn’t all that talented at singing or acting. But hey…atleast she is hot, which is something I guess.

 

 

Melissa Harris-Perry
What is it with raging liberals and hyphenated last names?? I suppose it’s a feminazi thing. At any rate, this “journalist” is employed by MSNBC, which tells you all you need to know. I run across a story online atleast a couple of times per week in regards to the latest asinine thing she has said. It seems like MSNBC goes out of their way to hire folks like this who can’t simply report the news with some degree of intelligence. Look at your horrific ratings MSNBC…the proof is in the pudding. No one is buying what you’re selling, and providing a forum for laughably vapid mental midgets like Melissa Harris-Perry to spew her silliness has made you the laughingstock of TV news.

 

 

Jesse Ventura
I always liked Jesse “The Body” Ventura. He was a pro wrestler when I was a kid and then became a rather good wrestling announcer. He even acted a bit. When he ran for Governor of Minnesota in 1998 and won I thought it was pretty cool. But then Ventura left the reservation. He became a talk show host & conspiracy theorist, as well as…much to my surprise…a whackjob liberal. A couple of years ago Ventura sued noted sniper & American hero Chris Kyle for a story Kyle wrote about Ventura in his autobiography. Then in 2013 Kyle was murdered. The honorable thing to do would have been to drop the lawsuit, but Ventura persisted and won the suit in 2014. So now he is seeking to extract nearly $2 million from Kyle’s widow. I don’t know whether the incident occurred or not. All I know is that after Chris Kyle’s tragic death the matter should have been dropped. The financial situations of those involved is unknown to me, but I suspect that Ms. Kyle and her children need that money much more than Ventura. Gov. Ventura is a classic bully & narcissist, and I have lost all respect I ever had for him.

 

 

Gwyneth Paltrow
I was never a huge fan, but I never really minded Paltrow, especially in decent flicks like Seven, Shakespeare in Love, Shallow Hal, & Iron Man. But it is with a heart full of sadness that I have decided to consciously unfan Gwyneth because she is an out-of-touch twit who equates her tough life as a spoiled actress with things that soldiers face during war and believes that President Obama should be given as much power as he wants to do whatever he pleases. I guess they don’t teach kids about The Constitution in Hollywood.

 

 

Rep. John Boehner & Sen. Mitch McConnell
The Republicans may have taken solid control of both houses of Congress after the November elections, but it will be meaningless as long as these two sellouts remain in power. Boehner, the presumed new Speaker of the House, and McConnell, the apparent incoming Senate Majority Leader, don’t have the cahonas to stand up to President Obama and he knows it. The results of the election were a clear mandate by the American people to stop the Obama agenda, but Boehner & McConnell are more concerned with compromising, reaching across the aisle, and protecting their own careers. We’ll see how that works out for them the next time they are up for re-election.

 

 

 

And the Sammy goes to…..

 
Bieber. I am tired of hearing about him. I am tired of having to nominate him for this award year after year. Hey…The Hohan had a quiet enough 2014 that we didn’t biebernominate her this time…maybe Bieber can stay out of the spotlight in 2015.

 

 
To present our next honor The Sammy Awards is pleased to bring back a young man that hosted the show just last year. He is an award winning singer and a timberlakemarginally talented actor. Please welcome back Justin Timberlake!! And the nominees are:

 

 

 

Favorite Radio Show

 

 

 

The Rush Limbaugh Show
I’ve been a Dittohead for over two decades. I agree with most of what Rush says and oftentimes laugh at those who criticize him because they are usually either outright lying or just don’t get Rush’s unique brand of humor and how he intentionally goads the liberal media. Having said all that, I have listened to Rush far less in the past couple of years than I once did. I just get too worked up about what President Hussein Obama has done to our country and I choose to avoid the strife as much as possible. I still tune in occasionally, but I don’t ever see myself getting back into being a hardcore daily listener again.

 

 

Intelligence For Your Life w/John Tesh
Most remember Tesh as the co-host of Entertainment Tonight from 1986-96. However now he hosts a syndicated radio program where he imparts bits of helpful wisdom to parents, spouses, employees, pet owners, students, and those looking to improve their health. Most of the factoids mentioned are from studies, polls, articles, & interviews that Tesh’s researchers track down. He is kind of like a DJ in that he only speaks briefly between songs. I listen to the show on my way to church on Sunday mornings but I believe it airs a few times during the week.

 

 

Soap Box w/ Lilly & Martha
My sister & I had a babysitter when we were kids that got us hooked on soap operas. 35 years later I still watch Days of Our Lives, General Hospital, & The Young and the Restless. Last summer I discovered an online network called TRadioV. All the shows are radio shows that also air on “online” TV. There are several programs on TRadioV, but I instantly became a fan of Soapbox, which is basically two former soap stars talking about soap related news and interviewing various soap opera actors. Unfortunately they haven’t aired a new show since October so I don’t know what’s up with that.

 

 

Metronews Hotline w/Dave Weekley
This is a statewide show here in West Virginia. Weekley has been a news personality at various places in the state for about 30 years. I remember him as a sports anchor at one of the local stations when I was a kid. A couple of years ago he got the dream job that I never knew I always wanted. Hotline airs from 3-6pm each weekday and is the kind of eclectic show that appeals to a wide audience. It covers news, sports, pop culture, finance, and anything else that Dave deems appropriate. He even has a segment called Beer Friday in which he interviews an enthusiast on the subject each week. My favorite daily segment is called In or Out in which Dave, a news reporter, & the show’s producer Coop give a thumbs up or down to various things.

 

 

 

And the Sammy goes to…..

 

 

 

Hotline. Like I said, I realize when I am listening that it is exactly the kind of thing that, had I been exposed to it as a youngster, I might have said “That seems cool. That’s the kind of job I want.” The show is laid back, as opposed to more sociopolitical programs, and I love the fact that it has such an assortment of subject matter. When it first aired it replaced Sean Hannity on my local radio station and I was rather upset, but hindsight is 20/20 and I am so glad the change occurred. I’m not nearly as into politics as I was a couple of years ago, and I’d much rather listen to an easygoing discussion of sports, pop culture, & a little bit of news. I don’t listen every day and certainly not for the whole three hours, but the little snippets I catch here & there are a pleasant diversion and absolutely better than most of the “music” on the radio.

 

 

 

To present our next award please welcome actor, writer, producer, and one of the most popular stand-up comedians in the world. Give it up for Louis CK!! And thelouisck nominees are:

 

 

 

The Twitter Award for Most Interesting Water Cooler Topic

 

 

 

Minimum Wage
The first minimum wage in the United States was passed into law in 1938 and was 25 cents/hr. There have been incremental increases over time and the federal minimum wage is currently $7.25/hr. Of course the problem is that costs oftentimes rise faster than wages. A gallon of milk in 1938 cost 50 cents/gallon and movie tickets were a quarter. In 2014 those two things cost an average of $3/gallon and $8.50 respectively. Anyway, the minimum wage was a hot topic for debate in 2014. Various states and even some cities have passed their own minimum wage laws. Seattle, WA approved a plan to phase in what will eventually be a minimum wage of $15/hr. That sounds good, but we all know that bean counters & management types always figure out a way to tip the balance sheet in their favor. How many employees will lose their job?? How much will prices be raised for the consumer?? Technology allows some jobs to be done by machines now, so there will be employers that will explore such options rather than pay workers more money. It’s a slippery slope and an interesting discussion.

 

 

The Walking Dead, Sons of Anarchy, Orange is the New Black, Scandal, True Detective, Game of Thrones, Downton Abbey, American Horror Story, Veep, House of Cards, Revenge
These are all the TV shows that I constantly hear people raving about. I’ve never watched a single episode of any of them. Either I am missing out or I have better taste than the masses. I suppose I just march to the beat of a different drum machine.

 

 

Pot in Colorado & Washington
These two states passed laws in 2013 that legalized marijuana. Those laws went into effect in 2014, making those two states the butt of many comedians’ jokes. I have no idea how it’s going in those places because I live far far away. And I don’t smoke pot (anymore).

 

 

HIMYM Finale
How I Met Your Mother was a really enjoyable sitcom on CBS for 9 seasons. The framing device was a father (narrated by Bob Saget) telling his children (in the future of course) how he met their Mom way back in the day. Hardcore fans debated, deciphered, & dissected every episode in order to figure out which one of Ted’s various girlfriends would ultimately be The One and become The Mother. We finally met her near the end of season 8 (and she was enchanting) and waited anxiously for Ted to meet her in season 9, which he did. And then in a flash forward during the series finale the writers all-too-casually had The Mother die. It turns out that the whole framing device was just Ted trying to work up the courage to ask his teenage kids if they’d be offended if he got back together with his old girlfriend Robin. One of the biggest storylines during the last few seasons was the love story between Robin and notorious womanizer Barney, who eventually married only to all-to-casually get divorced in the finale, with Barney returning to his lecherous ways (and fathering a child with the 31st woman he’d slept with in a single month) and Robin eventually reuniting with widower Ted. The audience was split about 60/40, with the majority hating the last episode. The writers had planned the ending a decade earlier and stubbornly stuck with their plan instead of assessing how the show had evolved. It is one of the biggest blunders in television history and the reason why I will NEVER watch a HIMYM repeat.

 

 

Dying With Dignity
Typically nominees for this award lean toward more lighthearted & superficial subject matter, but in 2014 this was a thing. Why?? Well, back in the fall the world was introduced to 29 year old Brittany Maynard, an Oregon woman with a brain tumor who announced her intention to take a physician prescribed pill that would end her life before she began to suffer debilitating pain & anguish. Maynard became an advocate for “dying with dignity” and was regarded by many as a hero before indeed ending her life on November 1st. Of course the other side of the debate is that ending one’s own life under such circumstances is “playing God”. I can see both sides. My faith & beliefs tell me that it is wrong. However it is far too easy for others to criticize when most of us haven’t had to face such unique circumstances. I’ll just say this. Brittany Maynard made a choice. It isn’t up to me or anyone else to decide whether she was right or wrong. That is between her & The Lord. It is a free country and she did something that was legal where she resided. However, I think we need to be very cautious when referring to that choice as heroic or inspirational. She took the easy way out. I realize that sounds harsh but it isn’t meant to be. It’s human nature. Most folks spend their entire lives looking for the easiest possible way to get things done on a multitude of levels and that’s okay…it just isn’t brave or noble. What would you do in a similar situation?? What would I do?? To be honest I’m not sure I know that answer.

 

 

Kim Kardashian’s Ass
Speaking of superficial. Kardashian is well known for being a useless waste of oxygen. Anyone whose claim to fame is a sex tape and who then goes on to marry & generate offspring with a piece of garbage like Kanye West isn’t a person I’d want to know. Anyhow, I guess Kim was feeling a little ignored so she decided to grab the spotlight again the only way she knows how…by taking her clothes off. A few months ago a now infamous photograph was published in some snooty magazine (they still have those??) that featured KK’s much talked about backside. It was all oiled up and everything!! I’ll give that family credit for one thing…they know how to create publicity and keep that cash rolling in. All I know is that the generations of my grandparents & great-grandparents would be horrified by the type of inelegance that has made the entire Kardashian clan famous for no apparent reason.

 

 

ALS Ice Bucket Challenge
For about 6 weeks last summer one couldn’t peruse The Internet for longer than five minutes without seeing a video of someone accepting the Ice Bucket Challenge. The setup was simple…shoot a video of yourself having a frigid container of ice water poured over your head and then publically challenge a few friends to do the same. It was to raise awareness about amyotrophic lateral sclerosis, better known as Lou Gehrig’s disease, which by all accounts is a horrifying & debilitating disease that sometimes gets lost in the shuffle amid concerns about cancer, AIDS, whatever weird version of the flu is freaking everyone out at the moment, & a dozen other maladies. Those who did the “fun” part of the challenge were also supposed to send a donation to the ALS Association, which did see contributions of over $40 million in just a month compared to less than $20 million during the entirety of 2013. In other words it worked. Using social media to get people involved by doing something silly & pretty easy is pure genius. There were some folks that had an issue with the idea that people were having fun with the challenge and forgetting about the reason behind it, and I am sure there were many people who dumped water on their head but didn’t bother to write a check. However, the proof is in the pudding and the whole thing obviously worked…atleast in the short term.

 

 

Clooney & Pitt Marry
No…not to each other. The ladies’ favorite bachelor George Clooney married some Lebanese babe this past autumn, while Brad Pitt finally made an honest woman out of Angelina Jolie in August after they’d lived in sin for a decade and adopted an entire litter of those children that Sally Struthers used to cry about on television.

 

 

Late Night TV Changes
Citizens of The Manoverse know that their humble Potentate of Profundity loves late night talk shows. Unfortunately 2014 saw the landscape change dramatically and I am not sure it was for the better. Jimmy Fallon replaced Jay Leno on The Tonight Show, while SNL alum Seth Meyers took Fallon’s old 12:30am spot on Late Night. Sure Leno was kind of old-fashioned, but I still thought he was funny. The masses rave about Fallon, but I have been disappointed. I really enjoyed him on Late Night, but his version of Tonight seems narcissistic. I can’t imagine that many of the celebrities that come on the show are interested in playing some silly game when they are there to be interviewed about & promote their latest project. Not only did Fallon not tone down his act for the 11:30pm time slot…he’s actually become more hyper & turned the volume up to 11. Meanwhile Meyers is…okay. He’s more of a traditional late night host, but unfortunately that translates into him being kind of forgettable and only mildly amusing. Call me old school, but the more laid back show with customary interviews focusing on the guests should be at 11:30, while the wackier program that colors outside the lines should be on later. I also don’t care for Meyers’ sidekick…fellow SNL refugee Fred Armisen. I don’t get Fred’s shtick at all and don’t find him the least bit funny. I watched Meyers for the first couple of months he was on but got bored and decided to check out CBS’ Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson. I had decided years ago that Ferguson wasn’t my cup of tea, but it turns out I was wrong. I am so mad at myself for not discovering his brilliance until less than a year before he too left his gig. Some British dude I have never heard of will take over the Late Late Show this spring, and since I learn from my mistakes I suppose I’ll give the new guy an chance. David Letterman is still around but he has already announced his impending retirement. Stephen Colbert is getting that gig, which doesn’t impress me since I have never really cared for Colbert. I think I see the day coming when I won’t have much of a reason to stay up past 11pm, which kind of makes me sad.

 

 

Bill Cosby
Who knew that lovable Dr. Heathcliff Huxtable…Fat Albert…the guy who made us all crave Jello Pudding Pops…was a total perv?? Well okay…nothing has been proven and it never will be because the things that allegedly occurred happened far enough in the past that statutes of limitations have all run out. However, I am one who believes that where there is smoke there is fire. We could shrug off one or two allegations, but in the latter few months of 2014 several women came forward and accused Cosby of drugging & raping them. So far Cosby has said very little. It is doubtful he ever will, although I have this terrible feeling that if he does decide to speak out Oprah will somehow be involved. At any rate, the damage is done. Bill Cosby’s reputation as a legendary comedian and America’s favorite TV Dad has been irrevocably damaged, which also makes me sad.

 

 

The Latte Salute
To say that I am not President Obama’s biggest fan would be a huge understatement. A few months ago he proved (for the thousandth time to those paying attention) what kind of man he is. Upon exiting Marine One after it had landed in New York the President saluted the serviceman standing beside the helicopter’s stair. However, the hand that he saluted with also held a cup of coffee (or possibly hot tea) and the Commander-in-Chief strutted by the young soldier as if he was gum under the Presidential shoes. The incident quickly went viral and reactions fell predictably among party lines. Conservatives saw it as additional confirmation of the person we believe Obama to be, while liberals were quick to draw (idiotic) comparisons between The Latte Salute and former President George W. Bush saluting a soldier with one hand while holding his dog in the other. In the grand scheme of life it doesn’t really matter, but the whole situation got some major play online and on TV for several days.

 

 

JK Rowling Pontificates
I, like millions of others, loved the Harry Potter books. I enjoyed the movies too…just not as much as the books. Fictional characters have a way of becoming living, breathing entities to fans, as if they really exist(ed). Santa Claus, Sherlock Holmes, Deputy Barney Fife, Huckleberry Finn, Batman, Mr. Spock…the world would be a better place if these were real people, but atleast we have the pleasure of enjoying their make-believe adventures. Harry Potter, along with his pals Hermione Granger & Ron Weasley, can be counted amongst these types of beloved characters. Universal Studios spent hundreds of millions of dollars to bring the world that author JK Rowling created to life in the form of a state-of-the-art theme park. Fans know the books and they know the movies. The problem is that Rowling won’t shut up and move forward. She continues to ponder what she should have done differently even though absolutely no one wants to hear it. Last February she caused an uproar amongst Potter fans by saying that Harry & Hermione should have ended up together instead of Hermione & Ron. That’s like saying that Darth Vader shouldn’t have been Luke Skywalker’s father or that Marty McFly should have never made it back to 1985. It’s heresy. Yes these are fictional characters…but they’re real to us dammit!! It isn’t the first time Rowling has added unnecessary context to something that wasn’t broken. Several years ago she tried to kiss the tushies of the PC crowd by saying that Professor Dumbledore was gay, even though neither the books nor movies come close to going there. So why say these things?? Please Ms. Rowling…just be quiet and let us enjoy this wonderful thing you produced that has been treasured by millions for many years.

 

 

Common Core
Common Core is an educational initiative that aims to define what exactly schoolchildren should know and when they should know it. Personally I thought we had all that ironed out decades ago, but apparently some bureaucrats got bored and decided to re-invent the wheel. The problem is that when government gets involved in things they tend to become completely screwed up. I don’t have any kids (that I know of) so I’m not exactly sure what all the issues are, but my perception is that Common Core has made both teaching & learning far more complex than necessary. Parents don’t like it, teachers don’t like it, students don’t like it. Some states have already opted out of it. It sounds like something that sounded good in theory but in practice doesn’t work as intended. I could be wrong. I don’t know.

 

 

 

And the Sammy goes to…..

 

 

 
The Ice Bucket Challenge. It was fun. It was goofy. It gave people the opportunity to do two things they love…be on camera and challenge others. More ibcimportantly, it achieved its stated goals of raising money for & awareness about ALS. Many took the opportunity amid the irreverent silliness to talk about their personal experiences with the disease, and anyone who took the time to hear or read those stories couldn’t help but be touched. I don’t know what the future holds for the ALS Association. I suspect their fundraising won’t be quite as robust in 2015, which is unfortunate. Something like the Ice Bucket Challenge can’t really be effectively repeated although I am sure some will try. We’ll just have to hope & pray about the future, but we can atleast look back at those few weeks in the summer of 2014 and be happy that an impact was made.

 

 

 

 

This seems like the appropriate place to take another break. Please stay tuned for the exciting conclusion of the 2014 Sammy Awards!!

The 2014 Sammy Awards – Part I

SammyAwardBefore we get too far into 2015 it is time to take one final look back at the year that was 2014. Welcome to the 5th annual Sammy Awards, an introspective review of the previous year, as well as the world’s coolest imaginary awards show. I like to think of The Sammys as an eclectic remix of real awards shows…classier than anything MTV offers, not as pretentious as The Oscars & Grammys, and more engaging than the plethora of offerings (The SAGs, The Tonys, The ESPYs, The People’s Choice Awards, etc.) that no one watches. There are no acceptance speeches and many of the nominees aren’t even in the audience (for obvious reasons). The pace is brisk because shows like these tend to drag on and no one pays attention if the event lasts too long. I have always said that the show would be broadcast on HBO, but I would be open to options like Netflix, Hulu, or Amazon. Show me the money!!

 

Please give a warm welcome to the host of the 2014 Sammy Awards. He is an actor, comedian, & veteran of hosting awards shows. He has won Emmys, crystalGrammys, Golden Globes, & Tonys in the course of a legendary career that has spanned four decades. It is a deeply sincere honor to introduce Billy Crystal!!

 

 

 

 

After an inspiringly funny song & dance number by our host it is time for our first award. Please welcome the cast of one of the most underrated sitcoms of the late 70’s/early 80’s…WKRP in Cincinnati. Give it up for Howard Hesseman, Loni Anderson, Tim Reid, Jan Smithers, Gary Sandy, Frank Bonner, & Richard Sanders.

hessmanandersonreidsmitherssandybonnersanders

 

 

 

 

And the nominees are:

 

 

 

Favorite TV Show

The Big Bang Theory
Not only does CBS continue to air original episodes (the show is currently in the midst of its 8th season), but TBS airs multiple repeats several nights per week. One can see how the series has evolved. I realize that there are some that believe that the quality of the writing has gone downhill and that the original nerd concept has somewhat softened into what is essentially a Friends rehash. That idea isn’t completely off base, but I feel like TBBT is still performing at a high level and is better than any sitcom that’s come down the pike in the past decade.

 

Gotham
I am a certified Batmaniac!! I love everything Batman. The concept of this show however is less about Batman and more about Gotham City as a lawless wasteland. It shows us James Gordon as a young, fresh, idealistic cop that is partnered with cynical veteran Harvey Bullock. It just so happens that the first case the duo is assigned is the murder of Thomas & Martha Wayne (aka Batman’s parents). Along the way we are given origin stories for some of Batman’s most infamous foes…Catwoman, Penguin, Poison Ivy, Scarecrow, Riddler, & Two-Face (so far). We also meet young Bruce Wayne and his butler Alfred, but they are in the background. In some ways Gotham is not unlike your typical police procedural…Law & Order, CSI, NCIS, etc…but with the framework of the Batman mythology, solid performances, & fantastic writing it stands out from the crowd. It is a bit too violent at times for my taste, but I can live with that if the stories are great.

 

Mike & Mike in the Morning
The four time winner of this award has secured another nomination. However, I must say that it’s been a tough year for Greeny & Golic. The sports world has had more than its fair share of controversial, sociopolitical issues and oftentimes while the guys are discussing these kinds of topics I find myself realizing that they lean pretty far to the left. I understand that it is tough for the talking heads on ESPN and elsewhere. They can’t just ignore stories like Ray Rice, Adrian Peterson, Donald Sterling, or the Washington Redskins nickname. But I found myself changing the channel a lot in 2014. I’ve curtailed my exposure to politics and other kinds of stressfully provocative programming, and when that stuff seeps into my sports I find it even more important to seek alternative entertainment. The Mikes are still very funny & enjoyable much of the time, but I don’t find myself getting up early or otherwise going out of my way to watch the show like I did in the past. Maybe 2015 will provide less contentious sports stories and we can all go back to relaxing and having fun with Mike & Mike. I hope so anyway.

 

The Herd
Everything I said about Mike & Mike applies to Colin Cowherd as well. However, I do find Colin to be less…weasely…than Mike Greenberg and much more intellectually stimulating than Mike Golic. I don’t always agree with his opinions, but I respect the thought that goes into them and the articulate way in which they are presented. Cowherd can be a funny dude too, and he mostly does the show himself, with minimal help from guests.

 

Highly Questionable
Thankfully ESPN has settled on a time slot for this show (4pm on ESPN2), but I still feel like it gets pre-empted an awful lot. Hosts Dan Lebatard & Bomani Jones are acquired tastes that may not appeal to everyone, but I find them rather entertaining in small doses. And I love Dan’s father Gonzalo (aka Papi), a 70 year old Cuban immigrant who inexplicably reminds me of my 100 year old (if he were still alive) Italian grandfather. The show is briskly paced, which means the hosts don’t have time to dive too deep into controversy, a fact that serves them well (especially during a weird sports year like 2014). It’s informative & fun, kind of like a mid-afternoon snack that won’t curb your hunger completely but will tide you over until dinner.

 

Girl Meets World
I wasn’t the target demographic for the parent show Boy Meets World in the 1990’s, so I am most certainly not the audience this program is going for, which I am assuming is young teenage girls. However, I always liked Boy Meets World. It was the kind of lighthearted, family friendly show that ABC specialized in at the time (other examples: Step By Step, Perfect Strangers, Full House, & Family Matters). Girl Meets World re-introduces us to Cory & Topanga Matthews, who have now been married for 14 years and have two children. One of those kids…young teenager Riley…is the focus of the show. I think Girl Meets World…like its predecessor…will evolve & mature over time. There is a nostalgia factor right now, which is why people like me tune in. But that can’t last forever. The acting is a bit over-the-top, I don’t know what the heck Ben Savage did to his nose, & one can certainly tell the difference between a program airing on a broadcast network like ABC and a show like this that is on The Disney Channel. We’ll see where Girl Meets World is at in a year or two, but at the moment I am giving it a tentative thumbs up.

 

 

And the Sammy goes to…..

 

 
The Big Bang Theory. Kudos to TBS for the abundant re-runs. I have probably seen every episode of the show’s first seven seasons atleast 2 or 3 times. I can’t tellbbt you how many lonely & tedious evenings in the past year have been made tolerable by the presence of TBBT on my television. Oh I still like the new stuff that airs on CBS each Thursday evening, but it was the repeats that secured the award.

 

 
sternTo present our next award The Manofesto is pleased to welcome the world’s foremost “shock jock”. Give a warm welcome to radio & TV personality Howard Stern.  And the nominees are:

 

 

 

Biggest Non-Sports Sports Story

Michael Sam
Defensive end Michael Sam is gay. Did you know that?? If you watched ESPN this past spring you surely did know since the entire cast of talking heads yapped about it every 5 minutes for months. Sam was the only 7th round draft choice I have ever seen that had cameras in his house when he got the phone call. And then all the way thru training camp with the St. Louis Rams his every move was reported by the press. Sadly the liberal narrative took a hit when he proved himself not good enough to play in the NFL. But then Jerry Jones came to the rescue and the Dallas Cowboys signed Sam to their practice squad. Eventually they released him too but by then the sports media had moved on and last I heard the young man was whining that he didn’t receive a fair shake because he is gay. Dear liberals: You can’t have it both ways. You can’t say it’s no big deal when a Democrat manwhore President cheats on his wife in The White House because “it’s just sex” and then turn around and act like the world owes someone fame & fortune because of their chosen sexual preference. Michael Sam was ultimately judged on his talents & abilities on the football field and he simply didn’t have what it takes to make it at the highest level.

 

The Washington Redskins
I have no doubt that someday owner Dan Snyder (or whomever he eventually sells the team to) will be forced to change the team’s name, and that will be a sad day. I detest political correctness and that is all this “controversy” is. I never heard of anyone having an issue with the term Redskins back in the 80’s when Washington was winning Super Bowls, and multiple polls have shown that only a very small minority of the general population as well as an equally small number of Indians…oops, I mean Native Americans…have a problem with the name. This is a media driven story that a handful of glory seeking politicians leech onto occasionally when they get bored. It’s idiotic.

 

Tony Stewart Kills A Man
Tony Stewart has been my favorite race car driver ever since the tragic death of Dale Earnhardt Sr. over a decade ago. Smoke is brash & outspoken but is rarely a jackass about it like Kyle Busch. He’s a throwback to when racing wasn’t quite so corporate and isn’t a polished pre-fab pretty boy like Jimmie Johnson or Jeff Gordon. However, this past summer he found himself at a low point when he was moonlighting at a dirt track in central New York. Things got a little heated on the track (as they sometimes do) and a young driver got out of his car and walked into the middle of the track where he was inadvertently struck by Stewart’s car. The young man died and for awhile it looked like Stewart may face criminal charges. I never for one second believed that the incident was intentional, and it was later discovered that the deceased driver had been high on ganja. Smoke took a few weeks off and a grand jury found no cause for an indictment. Tony Stewart finished the NASCAR season, but unfortunately he will have to live with what happened for the remainder of his life, as well as deal with the judgment of those who think they know more than multiple levels of a legal establishment that decided this was nothing more than a tragic accident.

 

NFL Thuggery & Ineptitude
It all started last February when Baltimore Ravens’ RB Ray Rice knocked his wife out in an Atlantic City elevator. A video was released showing Rice dragging the young woman out of the elevator and the NFL responded by suspending him for three games. Several months later additional video footage from inside the elevator was released and all hell broke loose. The NFL & the Ravens acted stunned by what the video showed, even though Rice had admitted what he’d done and what the second video showed was 100% totally NOT a surprise. In a purely PR move the league suspended Rice indefinitely and the team released him immediately. As if that wasn’t enough, at around the same time that the NFL was completely bungling the Rice fiasco Minnesota Vikings RB and noted manwhore Adrian Peterson was arrested for beating his 4 year old son with switches to the point that the child had multiple bruises and lacerations. This is the same guy who has six children by multiple women. One of those children died when he was two years old in 2013 after the babymomma’s boyfriend beat him up. No big deal for AP though. He’d never even met the kid and didn’t know he even existed until shortly before the child’s death. A few days after the infant died Peterson was treated like a conquering hero when he overcame his “grief” and played on Sunday. At any rate, the NFL acted swiftly…kind of…this time, suspending Peterson for the remainder of the season. Almost as noteworthy as the incidents themselves is the complete incompetence shown by NFL Commissioner Roger “Fidel” Goodell, one of the most evil people in the history of sports. There was brief talk that Goodell may lose his job, which would have been awesome. Unfortunately for the game that will eventually be flag or two-hand touch football he retained his position and will likely continue on his path of destruction for several years.

 

Jim Kelly’s Cancer Battle
Hall of Fame quarterback Jim Kelly led the Buffalo Bills to four consecutive Super Bowls in the early 90’s. Losing all four of those games might have been tough, but Kelly has dealt with worse. In 2005 his 8 year old son Hunter died of a rare nervous system disease. And then in 2013 he was diagnosed with jaw cancer. After treatments Kelly was cancer free, but in 2014 the cancer recurred. The sports media followed the story closely and the way Jim Kelly and his family handled the situation was inspiring. In August, after more chemo & radiation he was again declared cancer free. I have never met the man, but he seems like a solid guy. We should all say a little prayer occasionally that Jim Kelly remains healthy and gets to enjoy a long & happy life.

 

Donald Sterling
At the beginning of 2014 Donald Sterling was the owner of the NBA’s Los Angeles Clippers. However, due to his own stupidity he no longer retains that title. Last spring Sterling was caught on video saying some disparaging things about NBA legend Magic Johnson specifically and black people in general. It didn’t take long for the story to blow up, especially since Sterling has previously been sued for racial discrimination and sexual harassment. The NBA has long known that this isn’t a good person, but now they were obliged to do something about it. The league banned Sterling for life and likely would have eventually voted to make him to sell the Clippers, but he agreed to sell without the league formally taking that step. I am somewhat uncomfortable that a business owner can be forced to sell his property simply because people disagree with something that he said in a private conversation. The Clippers employ black players, coaches, and management personnel, so there wasn’t any outright discrimination. It is a slippery slope that we must be cautious of in the future. However, Donald Sterling is the kind of out-of-touch whack job that is easy to root against. And we shouldn’t feel too sorry for him. The team that he bought for $12 million in 1981 was sold for $2 billion. Of course since we are talking about an 80 year old man the real winners are his family that will eventually inherit that fortune.

 

 

 

And the Sammy goes to…..

 

 

 
The NFL. Times are tough for football at all levels. Increased education & awareness about the effects of the sport on players’ health combined with the ever nfl-footballgrowing PC Police in America has the entire industry against the ropes. The last thing football needed was this kind of drama. Let’s be honest…there have always been thugs in sports. Just because a guy can run fast and do athletic things with a ball in his hand doesn’t automatically make him a good person. Fame & fortune not only doesn’t always translate into decency, but we have learned over the decades that it oftentimes has the opposite effect. We also know that people look at various crimes differently. Had Ray Rice & Adrian Peterson been caught smoking pot or speeding no one would have cared. Even if they would have held up a liquor store or ran someone down while driving drunk there might have been a collective yawn from the masses and some measure of sympathy. But one guy punched a woman in the face and the other physically abused a child. We aren’t quite as forgiving when it comes to those crimes. The NFL wasn’t blameless either, as they showed a shocking level of ineptitude in handling the situation…especially the Rice case. It seems as if the league suits are more contemptuous of cornerbacks & linebackers who might (GASP!) tackle a “defenseless” receiver (whatever that is) or sack a quarterback just a bit too hard than they are toward hooligans like Rice & Peterson.

 

 

 

This seems like the appropriate place to take a break. Please join us again soon for Part II of the 2014 Sammy Awards!!

Points of Ponderation…..Episode 5.14

A semi-regular attempt to address some of life’s minutiae that might otherwise be overlooked…..

*

With Christmas Creep becoming ever so pervasive and Black Friday beginning earlier & earlier I want to take a moment to give kudos to some Thumbs_upestablishments who will NOT be open on Thanksgiving: Costco, Nordstrom, Dillard’s, Marshalls, Pier 1 Imports, Burlington Coat Factory, Crate & Barrel, JoAnn Fabrics, TJ Maxx, Barnes & Noble, Sam’s Club, & Home Depot. I have no problem with restaurants being open on Thanksgiving because not everyone has somewhere to go and a family with which to celebrate with the traditional meal. However, I don’t think that retail shops should be open on the holiday.

 

 

 
jesusI get really tired of people yapping about Christians “ramming their beliefs down others’ throats”. Really?? Cite some examples. I suspect that most anything that would be used to illustrate the point would simply fall under the category of expressing opinions or stating principles, which last I checked was called free speech and not ramming anything anywhere. You don’t want to go to church?? Fine. You don’t even believe in God?? Okay. There will be some Christians who might want to discuss your views and try to show you the light, but again that is hardly forcing anyone to do anything against their will. Believe or don’t believe. Listen or don’t listen. It is your choice. What is really interesting is that the people who hurl these accusations at Christians are the very same folks who have spent the past few decades twisting themselves into knots trying to reshape America and shoving their beliefs…specifically about deviant LGBT lifestyles and abortion…down the throats of the populace under the seemingly hospitable guise of openmindedness, awareness, inclusiveness, multiculturalism, fairness, justice, & equality. And it has worked masterfully. They have skillfully created an environment in which Christians simply expressing Godly values is seen as hatred. Look at our nation in the 21st century vs. just 30 or 40 years ago. If this “fight” were scored like a boxing match in which points were awarded for legal reform and socio-cultural change it is the anti-Christians who would clearly be winning a unanimous decision. So tell me again…just who is shoving their beliefs down whose throats??

 

 

 
RIP Dallas. I loved the original show and was excited when TNT decided to air a reboot “next generation” series in 2012. I watched the first two jrseasons, with the second one including the death of JR Ewing (after the real life death of actor Larry Hagman) and its aftermath. However I admittedly didn’t watch one minute of season 3, and apparently a lot of other folks skipped it as well, hence its cancellation. It was a good long run encompassing a big part of the past 35 years. Everyone involved ought to be proud of the show’s legacy.

 

 

 
mansonCan we please stage an intervention for this woman who is planning to marry Charles Manson?? Obviously she has a screw lose, but she’s only 29 years old. There’s still time for her to get whatever help she needs and resume a normal life. But if she goes thru with it she’ll always be the crazy chick that married Charles Manson. Maybe that’s what it’s all about. We live in a celebrity obsessed culture where talentless people are often rewarded with a certain level of recognition by doing nothing in particular requiring any kind of skill. As a rather private person who prefers to fly under the radar I can’t relate to this desire for fame and sincerely believe we ought to stop indulging people. Getting rid of mindless “reality” TV would be a great place to start, as would denying this woman the opportunity to marry a man she barely knows, can’t possibly love, and with whom she can’t ever have a legitimate relationship.

 

 

 
I’ve been doing my best to stay away from political discussions this year, but I have to offer one opinion. If it were up to me the incoming Republican gopCongress would not have Rep. John Boehner & Sen. Mitch McConnell as their leaders. Been there done that. It’s time for new blood. Of course this won’t happen and the Republicans will destroy themselves from within as usual…just in time for 2016. I hope I’m wrong but I bet I’m not.

 

 

 
I ran across the following thread on Facebook recently:

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Original Post: When I see men post pictures with girls and I rejected them because they were perverted assholes who just wanted a hookup. I think to myself well there is a woman with low self-esteem who will have sex with anyone. Good for him.
Girl #1: Men r dogs
OP: Not all but the majority.
Girl #1: Like 80%
OP: I’m just happy they find what they are looking for.
OP: More like 95%
Girl #1: Most of them are not happy with themselves.
OP: Watch the YouTube video I posted last night. It is heartbreaking and shows men’s true character. Its call Bankok Girl.
OP: Men have way lower self-esteem than women and they are lazy.
Girl #1: True
OP: That’s why they like to humiliate and control women and call it dominance because they know they are not as superior as women.

*
crazyWow…bitter much?? First of all, to equate prostitution in Taiwan with all men everywhere is idiotic. I don’t know Girl #1 but I do kinda sorta know the original poster a little bit and she has some legit reasons to be somewhat cynical. That being said, this level of resentment & scorn is disturbing. Yes men can be selfish. We can be juvenile horndogs. Too often we are motivated by the wrong things. But really ladies…is it that bad?? Are men truly that horrific?? And let’s talk about women. Y’all ain’t exactly perfect. The Bible says to take care of the plank in your own eye before judging the speck in another person’s eye. Look, I know women like to get together and whine & complain about men. Guys hang out and talk about women as well. That’s being human. But people should be very careful about what they put out there for public consumption. Both of the women involved in this conversation are…physically…quite lovely. I know the original poster is single…I’m not sure about her friend. But I wouldn’t date either one of them because as pretty as they might be on the outside their souls are ugly & damaged. Most of us have enough problems without becoming involved with a person who might secretly hate us and thinks we are lazy dogs with low self-esteem who enjoy humiliating & controlling others. I’d prefer to remain single.

 

 

 
An historic event has taken place at The Bachelor Palace. I am not a fan of bright overhead light, so when darkness falls across the land I have some bulblamps in my living room that I turn on each evening. A couple of them have those funky looking decorative bulbs, but the others use normal 60 watt incandescent bulbs. It is my understanding that environmentalist wackos have been successful in having incandescent bulbs go the way of 8 tracks, VCRs, floppy disks, & freedom of religion. I just had my last incandescent light bulb burn out, so unless I am mistaken the next time I go shopping I suppose I’ll have to purchase some of those ugly fluorescent things that I’ve been told don’t put out nearly as much light. Have I ever mentioned how much I hate change??

Points of Ponderation…..Episode 4.14

A semi-regular attempt to address some of life’s minutiae that might otherwise be overlooked…..

–

coffeeThere was a recent controversy involving President Obama saluting a marine while holding a coffee cup in his right hand. Not surprisingly idiotic liberals (which is a redundancy) rushed to Obama’s defense like they’d run toward their child if heavy traffic was bearing down upon them. Their whiny little defense?? “But look…George W. Bush did the same thing!!”. The problem with that?? They are wrong (as usual)…Bush did NOT do the same thing. The photo liberals showed was of President Bush holding his dog in his left hand while saluting a soldier with his right. Sorry folks, but it’s just not the same. If you are one of the morons who posted that comparison somewhere online please don’t procreate because you’re retarded. First of all, Bush still saluted with his empty right hand as is the proper custom. It doesn’t matter what he was holding in his left hand. Secondly, what Bush was holding in his left hand was his dog. To equate a living breathing thing like a pet to a cup of coffee is just ignorant. One comment I saw comparing Bush to Obama summed it up perfectly: “One juggles a heavy dog in order to not disrespect the soldiers greeting his arrival on the tarmac and the other can’t be bothered to shift his coffee to the other hand in order to do the same. One made eye contact and smiled whenever possible when bushgreeting the troops, the other struts by them as if they don’t exist.” Exactly. Debates about this issue predictably disintegrated into accusations of racism, the automatic fallback option for liberals when they don’t have logic or truth on their side (so basically they use it all the time). Eventually I had to force myself to step away from these arguments to keep my sanity and because, to be honest, I’m not very nice when I get angry about these issues. You want to know why America is going to Hell in a handbasket?? Look no further than Washington DC and the 51% of Americans who voted this pathetic evil dirtbag into office. I just hope that we elect someone in 2016 who doesn’t hate everything our nation once stood for and that can undo all the damage that’s been done in the previous 8 years.

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More Pickup Lines:
I wish I was your derivative so I could lie tangent to your curves.laugh

.
Girl, are you wi-fi? Cause I’m feeling the connection.

.
If you were a steak you would be well done.

.
Are your parents retarded? ‘Cause you sure are special.

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I’ve had quite a bit to drink, and you’re beginning to look pretty good.

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Can I follow you home? My parents always told me to follow my dreams.

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If I could be anything, I’d love to be your bathwater.

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You smell like trash. May I take you out?

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If I were a gardener, I’d put your tulips and my tulips together.

.
There’s this movie I wanted to see and my mom said I couldn’t go by myself.

.
If I was a Jedi, would you be my force?

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iphone6_2988853bI haven’t upgraded my iPhone from the 5 to the 6 just yet, mainly due to economic considerations but also because I’m not all that sure it is necessary. Okay the new one is bigger…so what?? Is that it?? I might just wait until the 7 comes out, which I am assuming will be atleast two more years. Come on Apple…wow me.

–

Only a couple of episodes have aired, but I’m hooked on the new TV show Gotham. The show focuses on the early years of James Gordon’s career as gothama cop in gritty & menacing Gotham City and introduces us to fledgling & decidedly un-cartoonish incarnations of some of Batman’s infamous foes. Batman fans definitely need to check out the show, but I think it can be enjoyed even by those who aren’t dedicated diehards of The Caped Crusader. Donal Logue is particularly enthralling in his portrayal of Harvey Bullock, a hardscrabble, ethically challenged cop that hasn’t been depicted in any of the big screen Batman movies. Gotham may share traits with your typical dime-a-dozen police procedural, but its well-known backstory and distinct style set it apart from all the CSIs, Law & Orders, & NCISs. The show airs on Monday nights on Fox, which makes me a little nervous. Fox is known to pull the plug pretty quickly on underperforming programs, and the competition (The Big Bang Theory, WWE Raw, Monday Night Football, The Voice) is fierce. I know my DVR is getting a workout. I am confident though that the ratings will be strong enough for Gotham to survive and be a solid show that entertains me for many years to come.

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judgeNormally I am a strict constructionist when it comes to The Constitution. However, I think maybe we should ponder the idea of age limits for the legislative & judicial branches of government. Would you trust your 90 year old grandparents to make significant decisions that affect an entire nation??

–

Another recent debate, although lower key and pretty much confined to online “conversations”, was about an intellectually confusionvacant waitress in Texas who says that Rush Limbaugh once tipped her $2000 and that since she considered it “blood money” and Rush “evil incarnate” she donated the cash to a pro-abortion charity (that she coincidentally worked for as well). This is all happened several years ago but is coming out now because the woman (who I will not name…no sense in giving an imbecile free publicity) has written her first novel. Well good for her. Congratulations. But let us consider the irony of a person rejecting “blood money” only to give it to an organization that funds abortions. Really?? It has always intrigued me the extent that liberals are willing to go to protect “a woman’s right to choose” what she does “with her own body”. My question has always been “What about the child’s body??”. There are millions of couples out there desperate to adopt a baby. If a person doesn’t want their child…for whatever reason…then why not give that baby the gift of life and those folks unable to biologically conceive a child the opportunity they desire to be parents?? It’s a win-win for everyone. The almost pathological need for pro-“choice” advocates to murder innocent babies is disturbing and quite frankly I’m sick of trying to be polite about it.

Points of Ponderation…..Episode 3.14

A semi-regular attempt to address some of life’s minutiae that might otherwise be overlooked…..

 

 

 

I wasn’t alive in the 50’s & 60’s, plus I am white. Therefore I can’t say that I truly understand racism or its effects on one’s life & psyche. However, I feel BoJfairly confident in making the assumption that folks from that era and before (including slaves from a few hundred years ago) would be appalled at the way the term racist is so flippantly thrown around these days. The media, politicians, and anyone else with a public forum to espouse their opinions play the race card as effortlessly as a NASCAR driver downshifting thru turns at Daytona. If a white person disagrees with or dislikes another individual and that second person just happens to be a minority then batten down the hatches because accusations of racism will be hurled. It’s sickening. It makes people hesitant to even argue their point, which of course is the idea…to crush debate. Liberals know that allegations of racism are intellectually vacant at best, but they also know that no one likes being called a racist. It’s a shrewd yet effective tactic, one that is now being utilized by the “LGBT community”, which should also offend anyone who has experienced true racism or oppression since being gay and being black are two completely different things.

 

 

FUI have taken a vow of silence…of sorts…on Facebook. Why?? Well, as citizens of The Manoverse know I can be rather opinionated. My sense of humor could rightly be described as sardonic…maybe even snarky. Those who know me understand that and know that I am, for the most part, a polite & introverted person who just happens to have a low tolerance for BS but unfortunately smells too much of it in our modern society. I have had to be mindful of my emotions on social media and have truly made an attempt to tone it down in the past year or two. Unfortunately, even though friends may get me, friends of friends often do not so when I express my (usually right) opinion in certain threads I have gotten into some intense tete-a-tetes with people I don’t even know. To be honest my dark side can come out in those instances and I can be easily irritated by ignorance or willful stupidity. There is one particular woman who has been a thorn in my side. She is ultra-liberal and, quite frankly, rather mean. She apparently went to college with me (I don’t ever recall meeting her) because we have a couple of friends in common. They are also raging liberals but they’ve never been mean to me so I have little reason to be disgusted by their presence on this planet. This nemesis of mine though…let’s call her Herb (she does actually make Rachel Maddow look like a Playboy centerfold…I’ve seen pictures)…is a disgusting piece of crap that has been repeatedly vicious to me. She has called me fat, lazy, and a bunch of other horrible things despite never having met me personally (that I recall). Ironically the last straw wasn’t anything political. Our mutual friend…who can be just as snarky as me despite being a bleeding heart left winger…had posted a humorous comment about Taylor Swift’s latest song. I simply replied that I didn’t think Taylor Swift is all that talented…or something to that effect. Herb jumped on my comment like Lindsey Lohan pouncing on a liter of vodka. I politely replied that I wasn’t going to get into another pointless argument with her, to which she replied that all my arguments are pointless. It was at that moment that I decided that I’ve had enough of idiotic bitches like Herb bringing me down. That’s what liberals do…they bring other people down to make themselves feel better about their own pathetic lives. I Herbdon’t know this woman. I don’t know if she is married. I don’t know if she has kids. I have no idea what she does for a living. I don’t care. All I know is that she is an evil shrew who I wish nothing but pain & misery. And I know that it isn’t worth the aggravation to engage such wretched wastes of space because they aren’t capable of intelligent debate, which is why I will no longer be posting much of anything on Facebook. Oh I will still upload photos & click on the “like” button occasionally, and I will post links to stuff I write for The Manofesto. But there will be no status updates, no articles posted with my witty comments, and certainly no opinions expressed on my page or anyone else’s. There is no benefit for me. Only agony & frustration await, and I am no longer willing to put myself through that just to argue a point with people who aren’t capable of understanding it anyway.

 

 

Speaking of racism…..
I didn’t watch the Emmy Awards. It was wrestling night and I have my priorities. Plus, out of the 12 nominated shows for Best Drama & Best Comedy I’ve only ever watched one. However, the next day I did search online for video of Billy Crystal’s lovely tribute to the late Robin Williams. Now, apparently, that tribute is being called racist. After Mr. Crystal’s warm words about his long-time friend they played a montage of Williams moments from various TV appearances. The clip in question was from an episode of Inside the Actors Studio when Williams was taking questions from the audience. I RW3remember watching it. At one point he takes a scarf from a woman and improvs several characters using the scarf as a prop. One of those characters was an Iranian woman who says “help me”. This is what is being called…by a few idiots on Twitter…racist toward Muslims. First of all, Muslim isn’t a race it is a religion. Secondly the bit was commentary on the way the Iranian government oppresses women. It is ridiculous that anyone’s takeaway would be that Robin Williams was racist. Most comedians make fun of everybody…black & white, male & female, rich & poor, straight & gay, Democrat & Republican, Christian, Muslim, Jew, & any other religion under the sun. Oh sure like most anyone associated with Hollywood many may lean a certain way, but if they only made fun of certain groups and let others completely off the hook they’d run out of material pretty quick. Robin Williams’ career lasted nearly 40 years. I am quite sure at one point or another he made jokes about a plethora of “controversial” topics. As a long-time fan of both Williams and Billy Crystal it really ticks me off that such a classy moment is being tainted by a bunch of spineless pantywaists whose main purpose in life is to get offended over nothing and cause trouble. Get a life losers.

My Life (More or Less) in 60 Questions

I love stuff like this. A Facebook friend posted it and encouraged others to answer the questions as well. Not only is it an opportunity for others to get to reflectionknow a person just a bit, but it is a fun little opportunity for self-reflection, which I believe is always a good thing. Since I have this awesome forum I decided that I wouldn’t just reply to my pal Samantha but would unleash my thoughts on the entire Manoverse. I believe this is the longest ditty I have ever written here, so be prepared. I have included a few links back to things I have written in the past when the subject matter seemed fitting. I pondered splitting  into two entries but decided against it. You’ve been warned.

 

 
1 Are you an animal lover or would you avoid keeping animals at home?
I have a 6 year old pug named Rocco who is the light of my life. I would love to have more dogs but my current living situation prohibits that.rocco

2 Do you like summer or winter?
Definitely summer. I despise winter except for Christmas & football season.

3 Would you diet or would you work out?
Ideally I’d do both, but I am too lazy to work out and not disciplined enough to diet. I did lose 30lbs. a couple of years ago with the help of a nutritionist but I became bored with the program. I felt much better at a lower weight and know, on an intellectual level, that I’d be better off eating healthier & exercising. Unfortunately knowing what one should do and actually doing it are far different things.

4 What do you wear to bed?
Shorts or sweatpants. Come & get me ladies…lol.

5 What’s your favorite clothing brand?
I am not brand loyal at all. If I like how it looks, can afford it, & it is comfortable then I will wear it.

6 When was the last time you cried?
I honestly don’t recall. I am a bit more emotional as I get older so sometimes a memory or something I see on TV will make me a bit misty. For example, I hate those damn ASPCA commercials with that Sarah McClachlan song!! They get me every time!!

7 Which color reflects your personality and why?
According to one quiz I just took it is green because “You’re very in tune with the rest of the world. You put others before yourself, but you strive to be a better person.Rainbow Sometimes you aren’t satisfied with the gifts you have so you envy the gifts of others, but people admire you when you don’t realize it.” A second quiz says it is pink because of a bunch of stuff: “is the color of peace…in a blissful state or looking for one…try to see the best in others…quietly study the best way to approach problems…see the world through rose colored glasses…shy, intelligent, hard working people who wish they were more a part of the mainstream but may be frightened of moving too quickly…watch what they do or say because they are afraid others might see them in harsh light…want everyone to be happy.” So I have no idea. Personally I like blue & purple.

8 In the animal kingdom, which animal would you be?
An eagle because it symbolizes freedom, honor, nobility, & a little bit of mystery.cropped-blue-light-eagle1.jpg

9 Do you like tattoos and body piercing?
No, not a big fan. A woman with tattoos or piercings (other than the ears) immediately becomes less attractive to me. I am not saying such things would automatically preclude a relationship (or a friendship if we’re talking about guys), but it’s just not my thing.

10 How much PDA is acceptable?
Moderation is the key. There is a fine line between appropriate affection andpda slobbering all over each other. Keep it classy.

11 How often do you take a shower?
Almost daily, especially if I am going out & about. However, there are those occasional vegg days when it’s not a priority.

12 What are your favorite magazines?
I was never a magazine person. And now with The Internet magazines are nearly obsolete.

13 What are your favorite books?
I’m a bookworm. I have lots of books that I love. I like classics like Huckleberry Finn, To Kill a Mockingbird, & The Old Man and the Sea. I love biographies. I love sports books, especially about old time baseball. I like fantasy stories like The Hobbit and Lord of the Rings. I’m pretty open-minded when it comes to books.

14 What’s your favorite movie?
I spent about 2 years here at The Manofesto writing about my 100 Favorite Movies. There is lots of good stuff in there if you are so inclined to check it out.

15 What’s your favorite music you’re listening to these days?
My taste in music is very eclectic. I love classic rock. Sometimes I get in the mood to listen to classical (Chopin is awesome if you’re looking to relax & unwind) and musicwould like to become more knowledgeable about it. I don’t detest all country music but it’s not really my thing. Jazz & blues are both really cool. I’m a big fan of crooners like Frank Sinatra (and The Rat Pack) & Tony Bennett. I hate rap and don’t really consider it music. I think the past 10-15 years has seen a sharp decline in the quality of music. Maybe that is just a reflection of my age, but there were just so many great songs in the 70’s & 80’s, and even the 90’s had its moments. 21st century music has no class or gravitas.

16 What’s your favorite alcoholic drink?
I’m really not much of a drinker anymore. I left that all behind…for the most part…after college. Back in the day I was a big fan of screwdrivers. If someone forced me to drink an adult beverage today I suppose I would lean toward the mojito, but I’m perfectly content with iced tea, skim milk, or water.

17 What’s your favorite vacation idea?
I’ve been dying to go to Vegas for several years…I just can’t get anyone to go with me. I’m not even a big gambler. I just want to see the sights, eat some tasty food, vegas& maybe see a show or two. I’ve never been to the beach and would love to check it out. If money were no object then I would jump at an opportunity to visit Italy. I’d also like to go on a cruise someday.

18 What’s your favorite food?
Do I have to pick just one?? I love chocolate. Sweets are my Kryptonite. I am Italian so of course pasta is a favorite. I also enjoy good old-fashioned comfort food…meatloaf, mac n’ cheese, fried chicken, soup, burgers & fries. I’m not really all that picky. I just love food.

19 Who’s your favorite actor?
Again I can’t pick just one. I think Jimmy Stewart is the best actor of all time. I also like Tom Hanks & Al Pacino a lot. Paul Giamatti has become a more recent favorite.

20 If you found a briefcase of money on the street, would you keep it?
No. I’d turn it in to the cops. Would I be tempted to keep it?? Of course. But, though I do succumb to the occasional pitfall and I’m not always the person I’d like to be,money ultimately I do usually end up doing the right thing. I blame my parents.

21 Are you religious?
I have become a relationship over religion kind of guy. One of my Undeniable Truths of Life is that “Faith and religion are two different things. Religion is a public show too often put on by hypocrites, while faith is a deeply personal thing that can change your life. Share your faith, not your religion.” Jesus is the way, the truth, & the life. Unless one is born again they will not see the kingdom of God. I realize that there are those that believe otherwise and I respect their freedom to go in a different direction.

22 Are you a gizmo person?
I’m not exactly sure what this means, but judging from my pal Samantha’s answer to this query I assume it is referring my-gadgetsto gadgets. I suppose I am middle-of-the-road on this one. I love my laptop and my iPhone. I’d probably buy an iPad if I could afford it. On the other hand I see the negative aspects of such things. Life was much simpler and people were more…interactive…before all these electronic toys began to consume society. Like many other things they are a double edged sword…both a blessing & a curse.

23 What kind of sport do you like?
I’m a big sports fan. I love football primarily, but also baseball & basketball. Nascar is pretty cool. I haven’t been able to get into hockey & soccer though I have tried.

24 Clubbing or candlelight dinner?
Definitely the candlelight dinner. I’m not into the bar scene anymore. It was fun in college but that was mostly because I was always hanging out with my friends.

25 Earth Hour or Fourth of July fireworks?
Earth Hour is some kind of environmentalist wacko crap. Independence Day, on the other hand, is a real holiday celebrating America’s birth as a free nation. Plus fireworksfireworks rule!!

26 Backpacking or a luxury hotel?
My idea of roughing it is when my AC quits working or I have a spotty wi-fi connection. I think backpacking is something hippies do in Europe. I only wish I had the means to spend a few days in a luxury hotel occasionally.

27 Christmas or Halloween?
I have nothing against Halloween. Unlike some religious folks I don’t think that some little kid dressed like a cowboy is doing Satan’s bidding. That being said, I gotta go with Christmas. Citizens of The Manoverse are quite familiar with my unwavering love for everything about Christmas. It truly is the most wonderful time of the year.

28 Are you a morning person?
Yes & no. Mostly no. I can be a morning person when necessary. If I have to get up early and go to work or keep some other kind yawnof appointment I am more than capable of doing so. However, I am a bit of a slow starter and function much better later in the day. I am a night owl.

29 What’s your philosophy in life?
Tough question. I’m not sure I have a single philosophy that can be expressed in one pithy statement. Throughout our lifetimes I believe we learn things, are shaped by our experiences, and can be influenced by many people with whom we interact.

30 When was the last time you were happy you lied?
Never. I’m not going to say I’ve never lied, but I know it’s wrong so of course I am bothered when it occurs. None of us are perfect, but the older I get the more I have a desire to be the best person I can be.

31 What comes to your mind when you think of your exes?
Ummm…I wish I had a few?? lol

32 Are you an introvert or an extrovert?
I am kind of in the middle. Probably more of an introvert. I can lead and I can speak in front of people when necessary, but I’m certainly not charismatic or inspiring. Plus more often than not people tend to annoy me. I spend a lot of time alone and I think I’m mostly okay with that.

33 What’s your idea of romance?
Hmmm. I suppose most women wouldn’t consider me very romantic. I haven’t really had much opportunity to flex those particular muscles. In my mind though I romancethink of romance as being completely comfortable with someone. A deep philosophical conversation can be romantic. Laughing at a silly movie together can be romantic. A text or a phone call “just because” can be romantic. Holding hands & snuggling can be romantic. Intelligence is romantic. Roses & champagne & chocolate are just fine, but people need to realize that a) those are just things and things are temporary, and b) they are empty gestures unless there is that level of comfort & respect that I mentioned. Women are sold a line of BS from time they are little girls about the ideal of a tall, dark, & handsome prince sweeping them off their feet and making their lives a fairy tale. I believe this is part of the reason that the divorce rate is so high. No man can live up to those lofty expectations…especially if he is a misogynistic drunkard with issues like jealousy, insecurity, & a need for control, which sadly describes far too many men. Cynical?? Yes, but nevertheless true. Aim high ladies. There’s nothing wrong with that. But stop thinking life is a Reese Witherspoon movie or anything like Sex & the City because you will be disappointed.

34 Would you like to live in the countryside or in a metropolitan area?
My preference would be a somewhat secluded country-esque spot with access (i.e. less than an hour away) to a city with some culture and entertainment options.

35 When did you lose your virginity?
Right after college. And actually I wish I still had my virginity.

36 What’s your favorite body part of the opposite sex?
Do you want the romantic answer or the horndog answer?? The former would be a woman’s eyes and her smile. The latter would be the boobies!!

37 What’s the wildest thing you’ve done sexually?
I can honestly say that I don’t think I have ever done anything that would be considered wild or weird…especially in today’s “anything goes” culture.

38 Do you think money can buy happiness?
Yes & no. I think financial security alleviates a lot of stress & pressure. Having money is a nice thing that comes in handy on occasion. But there are a lot of folks money-equal-happinesswho, as my grandmother would say, don’t have a pot to pee in that are perfectly content, while conversely there are many people with ample fundage (I’m looking at you Hollywood) that, to paraphrase U2, seem as if the still haven’t found what they are looking for. Love, friendship, peace, honor…all are much more important than money.

 

39 The world would be a better place if…?
Reality TV would go way…immediately.

 
40 Do you have any social causes that are close to your heart?
I’m not really a cause kind of guy. I bear no ill will toward dolphins, spotted owls, those little kids in Africa that Sally Struthers apparently steals food from, the adorable puppies that need adopted from the animal shelter, or anyone who suffers from the various diseases that can seemingly be cured by wearing little ribbons of various colors…but you probably won’t see me out crusading on their behalf. I do serve as the President of my local literacy organization’s board of directors, so education is something I admire, and I am involved with various ministries thru my church.

41 What do you do over the weekends?
It varies. I usually go to church on Sunday then come home and watch baseball & Nascar. Sometimes on Saturday I just vegg out (especially during football season), but a lot of times I’ll go to the grocery store or go see a movie. Sometimes I go out to dinner with my family. If there is something going on at my church I am usually involved. This coming weekend I’m going to check out an indy wrestling show and will probably spend an evening at one of the better fairs & festivals that pop up this time of year.

42 Would you mind if I had a best friend of the opposite sex?
This question, I am assuming, is theoretically speaking of a potential romantic partner. No I wouldn’t mind. I have known a lot of women who seemed to have more guy friends than female friends. As long as you aren’t cheating on me it’s all good.

43 Which was the worst phase in your life?
I have had a few valleys. I moved back to my hometown 6 months after graduating college, and I still consider it the worst mistake of my life. I lived at home with my parents for 5 years, and as much as I love my family it sucks to be living under your Mom & Dad’s roof when you’re in your mid-20’s. My mother died in 2000 and honestly I don’t think my life has ever been the same. In 2006 I began a 2+ year journey that I refer to as The Unfortunate Incarceration during which I had an ulcer on my tailbone that resulted in me spending six months in a “skilled” nursing facility, over a year homebound, and a couple of stints in the hospital.

44 What was the happiest moment in your life?
I didn’t realize it at the time but my childhood was pretty great. However I think the gold medal has to go to my college years. I probably spent a bit too much time having fun rather than studying, but since a college education doesn’t seem to mean diddly squat anymore (especially in WV) I am perfectly fine with how I spent those awesome years.

45 Do you judge a book by its cover?
Of course we aren’t supposed to but as human beings it is undeniable that we do so more often than we’d care to admit. The key is getting past that initial judgment and finding out what’s underneath the outer surface. Sometimes we find out that someone we overlooked or found fault with is actually pretty great, while there are occasions when we discover that someone we thought was OMG hot is actually nuttier than a damn fruitcake.

46 What’s your political stance?
I am very very very conservative.

47 Do you watch porn and what’s your view on it?
Let’s be honest…as a red-blooded American male of course I have watched it. I don’t find it particularly compelling though. The acting is atrocious and the storylines are stupid. I once took my friend Greg to a strip club for his 21st birthday. At some point in the evening I said to him “You look bored”. He replied “Well you can’t touch them and you can’t take them home with you, so what’s the point??”. Two decades later I still think it may be one of the more profound statements I’ve ever heard.

48 Do you believe in karma?
Ehhh…kinda sorta not really. I believe that sometimes people get what they deserve both good & bad, but I think it is more a function of the way a person leads their life funneling them down a certain path. If you are mean to people you may get away with it for awhile but statistically speaking you will probably cross the wrong person eventually. And if you are a decent person who treats people fairly and tries to do the right thing more often than not then at the very least you can look at yourself in the mirror every day knowing you did your best.

49 Do you plan your life or live for the moment?
I am by no means an obsessive planner, but neither am I all that spontaneous. There are reasons for this.

50 Do you think life is fair?
Hell no.

51 If you were marooned on an island, what are the five things you would take with you?
This is one of my favorite questions of all time. I have seen it in various surveys. I think a person could go one of two directions with the answer based on whether or islandnot there is a chance you can somehow work your way back to civilization. If yes then of course the items selected should be more practical & useful in the effort to get off the island. But I prefer the other scenario in which it is assumed that you’ll be on the island for the long haul and whether or not you ever escape is completely out of your control. I will also not cop out and assume that this island magically has Internet access or cable TV. Therefore, I will allow myself one work of fiction which would be the complete works of Sherlock Holmes. I would also want a Bible. Of course I’d want my dog Rocco by my side. I’d assume we could find stuff on the island that he could eat. A solar powered radio because music, in the words of Plato, “gives a soul to the universe, wings to the mind, flight to the imagination, and life to everything.” Oh…and a big ol’ knife. A guy’s gotta eat.

52 Would you sulk or would you confront?
I am a very non-confrontational person.

53 Are you addicted to anything?
Chocolatechocolate

54 Any current news that’s caught your attention?
I haven’t been paying as much attention to the news lately. It’s just too depressing most of the time. And there is way too much leftist bias.

55 What are your favorite apps that you use often?
I play a lot of air hockey on my phone. And of course there is Facebook, Twitter, Amazon, & ESPN. I also like Words with Friends and Paper Toss which is exactly what it sounds like.

56 Are you an optimist or a pessimist?
I am a Samist.

57 What do you have for breakfast?
I love breakfast food although I don’t always have it for breakfast. I can’t eat really early in the morning when I first get up. When I do eat breakfast the food varies. I Breakfastlike cereal. I like sausage & eggs. I am a big fan of anything with syrup…pancakes, French toast, waffles. I’ve been trying to eat more oatmeal because it is healthy and it actually tastes pretty good. When I go out for breakfast I like sausage gravy & biscuits.

58 How often do you make your bed?
I’ll just say that my unique circumstances make this question moot.

59 If you knew you were right, would you take a stand even if you know you would make a scene in public or would you let it go?
I have finally figured out that arguing with people is a pointless exercise that just leaves me frustrated. That’s fine since I am non-confrontational anyway. They’ll either figure out the truth or go thru life wallowing in ignorance. I know what I know, think what I think, & believe what I believe. It’s not my job to enlighten the masses.

60 What’s an absolute no-no in a relationship?
I’m not sure I have many deal breakers. I’d like to think that if I’ve made the decision to be with someone that I’ve also made the conscious choice to overlook minor flaws and compromise about conflicts. Honesty is important. I don’t think I could get past cheating. I probably wouldn’t get involved with a drug user. I think any potential mate would have to atleast respect my faith and sociopolitical views even if they didn’t completely agree.

Points of Ponderation…..Episode 2.14

A semi-regular attempt to address some of life’s minutiae that might otherwise be overlooked…..

 

 

 

 

 

I’m really not all that excited about Stephen Colbert taking over for David Letterman. Sure I think Letterman is long overdue for retirement. He stopped colbertbeing brilliant about a decade ago. But Colbert just doesn’t frost my cupcake. I thought maybe Conan O’Brien or even Jay Leno might get the call. It’s odd how late night TV has gone from pretty solid to kind of mediocre so quickly. Jimmy Fallon is doing a variety show completely centered on himself instead of The Tonight Show. Late Night with Seth Myers is bland and has the worst sidekick in the history of late night television in Fred Armisen. Jimmy Kimmel is cool but needs to start doing real time shows on Friday night. Craig Ferguson departing CBS’ Late Late Show doesn’t move my dial one way or another, but the decision on who will take over that slot is huge. If it’s another whiff like Colbert that waters down the whole concept of late night TV even more, but if they somehow pull an awesome rabbit out of the hat it could save the genre.

 

 
So I’ve been following something called “Pickup Lines” on Twitter and here are a few of the funniest/weirdest:
If you were a transformer, you’d be Optimus Fine.
You must be the square root of two, because I feel irrational around you.
Hi, I’m writing a paper on the finer things in life and I was wondering if I could interview you.
Is your name Ariel?? Because I think we mermaid for each other.
Are you my homework? Cause I’m not doing you but I definitely should be.
Interested in making some magic together? My wand is at the ready.
If you were a triangle you’d be acute one.
Know what’s on the menu? Me-n-u.
Do you like Pizza Hut? Cause I’ll stuff your crust.
You look familiar. Did we have class together? I could’ve sworn we had chemistry.
Would you like to get into a philosophical quandary over coffee?
There are Skittles in my mouth. Wanna taste the rainbow?
Are you from Tennessee? Cause you’re the only ten I see.
If you were a Dementor, I’d become a criminal just to get your kiss.
You must be from Pearl Harbor, because baby, you’re the bomb.
Cheesy?? Of course. Would anyone actually use these?? God I hope not. But they are good for a chuckle or two so if you do the Twitter thing check it out.

 

 

Has anyone ever noticed that TV characters rarely sit on the couch?? They’ll sit on the arm of the couch, or lean on the back…but not often do they actually sit on the couch like a normal person. Weird.

 

 
Speaking of Twitter, I recently saw a tweet from a lovely young lady that said something to the effect of “I don’t want a nice guy. I want a man.” I was left tough guywondering what the heck that even means. Do the two have to be mutually exclusive?? I completely understand that most women aren’t attracted to wimps. They want a man in their life that will take care of them and protect them. I get it. But just because a guy is “nice” doesn’t mean he isn’t a real man. Another acquaintance of mine on Facebook was publically pondering the question “Why am I so turned on by guitar players, marines, bad boys, heroes, and dominant men??”. I politely replied that it was because she had been unduly influenced by TV, movies, & pop culture. Is it any wonder why the divorce rate is so high in America?? I actually feel sorry for women. They grow up desiring some kind of rock star/50 Shades of Grey/Fonzie hybrid that just doesn’t exist. They end up in loveless marriages with narcissistic posers who ignore them at best and oftentimes treat them much worse. A cynical opinion?? Sure. But nonetheless likely a pretty accurate assessment.

 

 
I think hyphenated surnames are arrogant & pretentious. Pick one name and go with it.

 

 

I was watching an episode of HBO’s Real Time with Bill Maher awhile back because despite being a Godless liberal who is wrong about most everything cartermaherMaher can be kind of funny and his show oddly informative. Maher was interviewing former President Carter and asked him if…if…Republicans are able to capture both houses of Congress and then win The White House in 2016 (a tall order to be sure) does he believe that they’ll try to repeal Obamacare. President Carter said yes, but he then added a very interesting statement. He said Republicans would try to repeal Obamacare but it’d be difficult because by then so many people would depend on it. And I thought to myself “There it is!!”. That lone statement explains not only the Democrat playbook, but also the very reason why we should be careful about government programs in the first place. They sound good. They always sound like a really fine idea. An idea that helps people. Who doesn’t want to help people?? But what happens is that folks become dependent on these programs, which does two things. It negatively impacts our economy and it robs people of any kind of motivation to work hard, be self-reliant, and solve their own problems. Why help yourself when Big Government will take care of you?? It also ensures Democrats long & repeated terms in political office because who are most people going to vote for…the person who’s going to give them free stuff or the person who wants to take their free stuff away?? None of this is news to anyone who has been paying attention, but I thought it was fascinating to hear a former President outright admit it.

 

 

 

I recently tried chai tea for the first time. They were giving out free samples at a local grocery store. I wasn’t impressed and think I will stick with regular tea.

 

 

 

There has been a lot of debate…for some odd reason…on social media lately about whether or not it is safe to give dogs ice cubes. My Rocco has been roccochomping on ice since he was a baby (he is 6 years old now) and has never had any adverse effects, so I think the idea that it causes harm is a myth.

Points of Ponderation…..Episode 1.14

A semi-regular attempt to address some of life’s minutiae that might otherwise be overlooked…..

 

 

 

 

Wow…has it really been 8+ months since the last episode of PoP?? I guess it has!! As citizens of The Manoverse may have guessed your humbleponder Potentate of Profundity has hit another of my infamous valleys. This is the first thing I’ve published here since my NFL mock draft nearly a month ago. There are a few things in the hopper, but none are quite done simmering yet. Stay tuned.

 

 

 

Time_changeIs anyone else struggling with the recent time change?? I have felt like a zombie since Sunday. I want to nod off all day & evening, then toss & turn all night, and I’ve had a difficult time getting up & moving all week. I’ve made it to work on time…but just barely. I am usually 15-20 minutes early. I was becoming a bit concerned about my health until hearing comments from others and talking to some co-workers who assured me that they felt the same and that it was the time change. As much as I like having it be daylight until 7pm I think maybe we should consider ending this clock hopping madness that messes up our Circadian rhythm twice a year.

 

 

 

Speaking of biology…..

I may have mentioned this in passing on a previous occasion, but I am a sincere believer in the concept of a male “cycle”. There is a 2 or 3 day period angerabout every 6 weeks (it feels like it occurs less often than monthly) during which saying that I am “out of sorts” would be a significant understatement. Sometimes I cross over into murderous rage territory. No…I have never actually killed anyone or even come close to harming them physically. I am far too delicate for prison. But if people could read my mind trust me…they’d run in the other direction. There doesn’t seem to be any reason for this mixture of melancholy, weariness, frustration, & wrath, but it is quite real and bothersome. I have promised myself I was going to track the idea a bit closer and see if I could figure out any kind of pattern, but to be honest I have not followed thru. I do recognize the situation better now as it is happening and make an effort to isolate myself until it goes away. After a few days I wake up feeling blessed, encouraged, hopeful, & optimistic, and that is when I know the cycle is over…until the next time. Anyone with thoughts on the subject or who may have solid information about what I am just guessing to be a tangible reality is encouraged to comment. Reassure me that I am not crazy.

 

 

 

It is mid-March and I have yet to have graced a movie theater with my presence in 2014. Admittedly part of the reason is the brutal winter we’ve had here in Appalachia. When the temperature is in single digits and there is a bunch of icy white stuff on the ground this guy doesn’t go anywhere I don’t absolutely have to go. But there have also been a scarcity of films that I have any interest in seeing. There have been action flicks like Jack Ryan: Shadow Recruit, 300: Rise of an Empire, & the RoboCop remake that do clapperboardnot frost my cupcake at all. I have never seen any of the Tom Clancy/Jack Ryan films, and I didn’t watch the first 300. I don’t know what it’s about and I don’t care. I almost went to see Ride Along, but during the aforementioned murderous rages one of the first people I’d enjoy harming if I was that type of person would be alleged comedian Kevin Hart, whose 15 minutes of fame I sincerely hope ends very very soon. I pondered going to see the Liam Neeson action flick Non-Stop (because the promos really do sell the heck out of that thing), but then I saw spoilers about the terrorists being ex-military 9/11 family members and I decided that Hollywood didn’t need my money to spew forth their anti-American pro-Muslim agenda. I wanted to go see Son of God, but read some things about it being Hollywood Jesus instead of Real Jesus, that there are a plethora of Biblical inaccuracies, and that Satan was cut completely out of the film after politically correct Thought Police complained that he looked too much like President Obama. A few church friends have seen the movie and said it was good, but I still think I’ll skip it. It is likely that I will check out the new Muppets flick coming out in a couple of weeks, but there is nothing I’m really stoked about seeing until the Kevin Costner football movie Draft Day hits theaters next month.

 

 

 

I never thought I’d say this, but…..

Maybe NBC should have just left things alone. I can’t quite put my finger on it, but I haven’t enjoyed Jimmy Fallon’s Tonight Show nearly as much as I liked his Late Night. I find myself flipping over to Jimmy Kimmel more than I ever have. Fallon deserves credit fThe Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon - Season 1or not completely overhauling his act just because he moved to an earlier time slot. That’s what killed Conan O’Brien. JayLeno__130320220248__130809211218However, there’s just something missing with Fallon. I realized during his first week at 11:30pm that folks my Dad’s age were likely changing the channel because he just doesn’t play to an older audience. Now I realize that’s what brought about this change in the first place. The suits couldn’t possibly care less about my father’s demographic. They want the 18-35 crowd, and Fallon is apparently delivering that in spades. But I find myself thinking that maybe everyone would have been just as happy if Jay Leno would have been allowed to hang on for another decade and step down gracefully like Johnny Carson did (although there are those that believe he was pushed out just like Leno and chuckle about the karma). Leno was still pleasant & amusing, which is what the host of The Tonight Show should be.  I suppose I am at that point in life where seth-meyers-late-night-nbccomfortable & cozy mean more to me than edgy & daring. Maybe that’s what I always preferred. At any rate what’s done is done, and so I will move forward kimmel-0105being sporadically amused by a mix of Fallon, Kimmel, & Seth Myers, who isn’t great in the 12:30am Late Night spot but he’s not awful either. I wouldn’t be surprised if Leno popped back up somewhere in a year or so, and if that happens I’ll check it out. What about Bitter Letterman and goofball Craig Ferguson you ask?? Ehhh…I’ll pass…unless I’m really bored.

A Renovated Mount Rushmore

My boys Mike & Mike were recently debating who would theoretically be on the “Mount Rushmore of Basketball”. The discussion stemmed from a rather arrogant assertion by superstar LeBron James that if such a monument existed he would indeed deserve a spot. I had to get ready and go to work so I missed the latter portion of the show, but Greeny & Golic were in the process of taking the discussion in a bunch of directions like “Who would be on the Mount Rushmore of…baseball (pitchers, hitters), football (quarterbacks, running backs), hockey players, etc. This is not necessarily a thinknew topic of conversation. As a matter of fact, it is a reliable old chestnut that ESPN trots out occasionally when sports news is slow, which is of course the case right now since we’re kind of in that blah period that always follows the end of the football season. It’s a fun & harmless little argument to have since A) none of these “Mount Rushmores” actually exist and B) there are things that do exist called Halls of Fame where everyone deserving (and even some who don’t really deserve it) eventually get their just reward.

 

However, there is one Mount Rushmore that does exist.

 

I saw a really interesting documentary on The History Channel several years ago about Mount Rushmore. For those who may be unfamiliar, the mountain was already named Mount Rushmore long before anyone carved any heads on it. It was named after a New York lawyer who liked to hunt in the Black Hills of South Dakota. A few decades later a local historian got the idea to have U.S. Presidents carved into the mountains to promote tourism (because it’s always about the money). Danish sculptor Gutzon Borglum was awarded the job in 1925, and from 1927-41 over 400 men worked at Rushmorecompleting the task. Borglum chose George Washington to represent the birth of the United States, Thomas Jefferson to represent its growth, Abraham Lincoln to represent its preservation, & Theodore Roosevelt to represent its development. We must remember that when the project was conceived there were only 30 U.S. Presidents to choose from and I think most would agree that Borglum did a nice job of selecting his subjects. Originally he also wanted to carve representations of The Declaration of Independence, The Constitution, & the Louisiana Purchase, but unfortunately the money ran out (which also explains why the sculptures are just heads…they were intended to be full upper bodies).

 

So the discussion on Mike & Mike got me to pondering…who should be on the Mount Rushmore…of Presidents?? It’s been almost a century since the original monument was conceived and sculpted. A lot of history has been made since then, and we’ve had much more time to reflect on the history that occurred previously. In addition, technology is far more advanced, so instead of hundreds of men risking their lives and taking over a decade to complete the job I figure that we could whittle out a nice expansion in a few months.

 

Of course the questions are “who??” and “how many??” If it were me I’d go with seven. Many people think of it as a questionlucky number, and in The Bible seven is a number signifying completion. Plus I am a minimalist and there’s no use getting too garish with the idea. That means we have three spots to fill and 39 candidates. However, I really don’t think it’s even that complicated. Out of those 39 men I am assuming only 10 at most would get any votes at all in a poll of the masses. But that still leaves 10 guys battling for three spots. Who should be the three to join Washington, Lincoln, Jefferson, & Teddy Roosevelt??

 

jfkLet’s give one spot right off the bat to John F. Kennedy. Regardless of what one might think of his…private life…the fact is that Kennedy continues to be one of our most beloved Presidents a half century after his death. Martyrs tend to get that kind of love, and let’s face it…that is exactly how the public perceives JFK…as a martyr. His whole presidency has been romanticized. How would he have been thought of if he’d completed his second term and lived a long life?? Obviously no one can accurately answer that question, so we are left with what we are left with, which is essentially the first “rock star” President who was cut down in his prime by an assassin’s bullet and the media frenzy created by such a tragedy, which was a completely new shared experience for the masses. The Kennedy Presidency and The Kennedy Assassination are watershed moments in American history. Sounds like Mount Rushmore material to me.

 

That was easy. But now things get tricky and one’s opinion will almost certainly depend on worldview & political philosophy. I am going to try to avoid those pitfalls, which means I may surprise some folks with my selections.

 

I’d give the second spot to Franklin Delano Roosevelt. I have my issues with FDR’s New Deal, which laid the fdrgroundwork for the out-of-control entitlement mentality that is eating away at our nation like Rosie O’Donnell at a Vegas buffet, but the fact is that he is our longest serving President and led the country…one way or another…thru The Great Depression and World War II. The enormity of his Presidency…good & bad…and the pivotal era during which he served cement FDR’s spot on the revised Mount Rushmore.

 

ObamaSmokingOkay…so who gets the final spot?? Obama?? Many would champion that idea simply because he is our first reaganblack President, and even those that fervently disagree with his policies would likely concede the historical & cultural significance of that fact. However, not only is it too soon to debate the relative merits of the Obama Presidency, but I simply cannot…will not…award a spot on such a noteworthy shrine to a person based solely on a biological trait instead of tangible accomplishments. Reagan?? Many of my conservative friends would undoubtedly support the notion, and I understand why, but again I feel like it is too soon, and in comparison to Abraham Lincoln or even JFK I am not so sure admiration of Ronald Reagan is nearly as bipartisan. Clinton?? Please. What are we going to do…depict his head with sunglasses on while blowing a sax to commemorate his appearance on Arsenio?? Grant?? Undoubtedly a better General than President. Truman?? Eisenhower?? Solid choices. Did some great things. But were also flawed in ways nixonbill-clinton-loves-saxtoo substantial to allow them to make the cut here, although some really smart Presidential historian might be able to convince me otherwise. Nixon?? Well…I think Nixon gets a bad rap sometimes and was a lot better President than many would give him credit for, but the only U.S. President to resign from office just cannot be given a spot on Mount Rushmore.

 

My final spot…the 7th President to grace Mount Rushmore…would be John Adams. I’ve read a lot about Adams, and I feel like sometimes he gets overlooked when talking about America’s Founding Fathers. Adams was a lawyer, writer, devout Christian, statesman, philosopher, & historian. It should also be noted that, unlike Washington, Jefferson, or Benjamin Franklin, Adams never owned slaves. Though Jefferson receives credit for writing The Declaration of Independence the truth is that John Adams played a significant role in creating it. As the nation’s first Vice President he cast more tiebreaking votes than any other VP. Adams was the quintessential “man behind the man”. I am not sure if johnadamseither George Washington or Thomas Jefferson would have achieved as much if not for the support or…oftentimes in the case of Jefferson…the challenge of Adams. As a matter of fact, it seems to me that he may have been more comfortable being that person behind the scenes rather than the guy in the spotlight. Brilliant people are frequently like that. Biographer David McCullough opines that the reason Adams didn’t receive a second term as President was that “he was unlikable, short, ugly, and bald”. Sadly too many people are still that shallow. I think when folks are asked about our greatest Presidents many of us are shortsighted and think only of the people who held the office in our lifetime or maybe those who we know about thru old news footage, but we should never forget that America had a long and fascinating history of about 150 years before television was invented.

 

Agree?? Disagree?? Who would you add to Mount Rushmore?? Should additions even be seriously considered?? I welcome the thoughts & opinions of The Manoverse.

The 2013 Sammy Awards – Part III

After a bit of a delay it is time to wrap up the show with a flourish. If SammyAwardeagleyou have not yet enjoyed Part 1 and Part 2 of the 2013 Sammy Awards please take time to do so and then come back for the big finish. We’ll be happy to wait while you catch up.

 

 

 

matthew-broderickOur next presenters are thrilled to reunite more than 25 years steinafter they made one of the bestalanruck comedy films of the 20th century. Fromjennifer_grey_1MQvf the 1986 classic Ferris Bueller’s Day Off please welcome Matthew Broderick, Ben Stein, Alan Ruck, & Jennifer Grey.

And the nominees are:

 

 

Favorite Movie

Oz the Great & Powerful

Would someone dare risk remaking 1939’s Wizard of Oz?? Well…no…not yet (unless you count The Wiz, a 1978 blaxpoitation redux starring Michael Jackson & Diana Ross). But they did make a prequel. You see, L. Frank Baum actually wrote over a dozen books about the Land of Oz between 1900 & 1920, so there is a wealth of material for anyone enterprising enough to craft a decent film. Does this one qualify as decent?? Yes, I think it does even though it isn’t based on any of Baum’s books. The story shows how shyster Oscar Diggs…the future Wizard…ends up in Oz and introduces us to younger versions of Glinda the Good Witch and the dastardly Wicked Witch of the West…familiar characters to fans of the classic film. The casting is a bit questionable (I would have preferred Johnny Depp over James Franco as Oscar), but the transformation of kindhearted Theodora into the Wicked Witch is well done and worth the price of admission.

 

Last Vegas

Much like The Big Wedding this film unites four Academy Award winning heavy hitters: Michael Douglas, Morgan Freeman, Robert DeNiro (again), & Kevin Kline. Unlike The Big Wedding this film did not make me want to hurl sharp objects at the screen. In a nutshell four old pals (emphasis on old) reunite in Vegas for one of the group’s bachelor party, like a crossbreeding of Cocoon & The Hangover. Is it a great movie?? No. I could have done without a couple of the subplots and would have preferred to see A LOT more of Las Vegas. In my opinion if you are going to have one of the most fascinating cities in the world as a backdrop then why not make copious use of it?? Having said that though, this is a pleasant story with actors talented enough to lend gravitas to even the thinnest material. I can envision an entire franchise with this concept, at one point or another starring a virtual who’s who of old geezers: Nicholson, Eastwood, Redford, Shatner, Pacino, Caine, Gere, Cosby, Hoffman, Caan, Connery, Beatty, Harrison Ford, Hackman, Duval, James Earl Jones.

 

The Internship

Back in 2005 Owen Wilson & Vince Vaughn co-starred in the memorably hilarious Wedding Crashers, so the idea of them teaming up again seemed like a good idea. And while The Internship doesn’t quite measure up to the duo’s previous effort it is a perfectly acceptable comedy. Vaughn & Wilson have mellowed a bit and share the stage with a group of young unknowns, so I can understand why some may be disappointed by the outcome, but I also think comparing this film to Wedding Crashers is somewhat unfair. This is a pleasant enough way to spend a couple of hours and I have no complaints. Watch out for newcomer Tiya Sircar. She lights up the screen and has the potential to become a big star.

 

42

I came along a few decades after Jackie Robinson changed organized sports forever by becoming the first black player in Major League Baseball, but I am enough of a student of the game and appreciate its rich history & tradition tremendously so I am fully aware of his cultural impact. This movie tells the story and gives us a glimpse of some of the behind-the scenes hardships that Robinson endured. The only big name in the film is Harrison Ford who does a solid job portraying Brooklyn Dodgers GM Branch Rickey. Otherwise the cast are all unknowns, which I think works well for this particular movie. It’s an above average film even if it is somewhat forgettable.

 

The Incredible Burt Wonderstone

One would assume that the combined comedic talents of Steve Carell and Jim Carrey would be excellent ingredients for a funny movie, but this tale of an aging Las Vegas act in the vein of Siegfried & Roy trying to compete against a fresher magician in the mold of Criss Angel is just kind of…okay. There is solid support from the likes of Alan Arkin, Steve Buscemi, Olivia Wilde, & the late James Gandolfini (his final role…I think). A little bit of Carrey goes a long way, so I think these kinds of smaller “second banana” roles are perfect for him.

 

Free Birds

Animated films have really enjoyed quite the renaissance in the past couple of decades, thanks in large part to Toy Story and other Pixar productions. Free Birds doesn’t measure up to the best of the genre but it is nevertheless an amusing little story about turkeys who travel back in time to stop they & their brethren from becoming the main course for America’s favorite November holiday. Starring the voice talents of Owen Wilson, Amy Poehler, & Woody Harrelson, I don’t think it’ll become a Thanksgiving tradition on par with football, Planes, Trains, & Automobiles, or the Macy’s Parade, but I rather enjoyed it.

 

Grown-Ups 2

It’s the sequel that absolutely no one was clamoring for. Adam Sandler used to make funny movies (Happy Gilmore, Billy Madison, The Waterboy, The Wedding Singer), but he’s been on a bad roll for the past decade or so. In 2010 Sandler teamed up with Chris Rock, David Spade, Kevin James, Salma Hayek, and a few others to make Grown-Ups, about a group of buddies reuniting in their home town to celebrate the life of a former basketball coach. I revisited Grown-Ups on TV a few weeks before the sequel hit theaters and it was slightly more amusing than I remembered so I headed to the local cineplex on the Friday this flick was released. It’s not a bad movie and is spottily entertaining, although I could do without so many jokes about bodily fluids. The film benefits from the unexplained absence of Rob Schneider from the first one, but Rock’s comedic talents are squandered and I’ve never found Spade particularly humorous. The story is unfocused and ultimately pointless, but hey…it’s a freakin’ Adam Sandler movie so no one expects much, especially lately. This one doesn’t measure up to Sandler’s best stuff from the mid to late 90’s, but it’s a definitive upgrade from the crap (Jack & Jill, That’s My Boy) that he’s done in the past few years.

 

The Heat

I have become a bit of a hermit in my older years, so usually when I go to the theater it’s a weekday matinee. I’ve always kind of liked having an entire movie theater almost totally to myself. However, I made a rare appearance during prime time on a weekend to see this flick starring Sandra Bullock & Melissa McCarthy. The place was packed and everyone seemed to really enjoy the film. There was a copious amount of raucous laughter. It’s a typical buddy cop film in the grand tradition of Lethal Weapon, 48 Hours, and Rush Hour and therefore isn’t necessarily distinctive, but there’s a reason why Hollywood keeps going back to this particular well…it works. McCarthy is best utilized as a sidekick who can steal the show, while Bullock is a great “straight man”, so kudos for the perfect casting. The Heat is a bit too violent for my taste and the vulgar language is excessive, but those are the only two nits I can pick. There will almost certainly be a sequel, and when it arrives I’ll be sure to be there with my popcorn & chocolate covered peanuts.

 

The Hangover Part III

I have to give credit to the powers-that-be behind The Hangover. They took a relatively limited concept and somehow managed to squeeze a trilogy out of the idea. I also must say that unlike the somewhat amusing but way too safe Part 2 the filmmakers actually put some effort into this third installment. It’s a decent enough way to spend a couple of hours (actually less…which is part of the problem), but comes nowhere close to matching the original. These characters are…for the most part…ones that we really like, which means that there is already some capital built up with the audience. That capital is heavily drawn upon here and makes the whole deal acceptably entertaining, but the funny parts aren’t funny enough and there’s a little bit too much action/adventure and violence for a comedy. I have no doubt that…despite this entry being trumpeted as the end…we will see a fourth Hangover 5-10 years down the road and when that happens hopefully the combination of lowered expectations and absence making the heart grow fonder will dictate a more comical coda for this unique series.

 

Star Trek: Into Darkness

Some people loved it, some hated it. There are hardcore Trekkies who view this film as a subpar rehash of 1982’s renowned Star Trek 2: The Wrath of Khan, widely regarded as the best of all the Trek films. There are some who have decided that they hate director JJ Abrams and have zeroed in on his love of something called “lens flare”. Those folks are entitled to their opinion, but I happen to disagree. When Abrams rebooted Trek in 2009 he & the writers utilized an exceptional alternative timeline concept that allows for the idea that everything that happened to the original crew as portrayed by the actors we all knew & loved for decades (Shatner, Nimoy, DeForest Kelley, et al) still actually happened and this is just a different chronology. In my opinion this permits two things. It obviously gives the writers the freedom to create new stories. However, I also believe it allows old stories to be retold in a new way. I see Into Darkness as an homage to Wrath of Khan and enjoyed all the nods to Trek history. The “new” cast of the Enterprise is about as good as a Trekkie could have ever hoped for. I’m not sure if this particular  brand of Trek will end after completion of a trilogy, although my hope is that even with Abrams moving on (he has been tapped to revive the Star Wars franchise) someone else will take up the mantle and we will get to enjoy the adventures of this crew for decades to come.

 

Delivery Man

Vince Vaughn is back, this time in a remake of a 2011 French language film. Vaughn plays the kind of lovable ne’er-do-well that has kind of become his trademark. In this one he is a middle aged slacker named David who lollygags thru his day delivering meat for his family owned butcher shop, owes big money to the kind of guy one doesn’t want to owe money to, and has a cop girlfriend who has just about run out of patience with his antics. In his younger years David made some nice change donating copious amounts of his apparently high quality seed to a sperm bank and now finds out that he has sired over 500 children, a third of whom have now decided to get all litigious in an effort to find out the identity of their “father”. David doesn’t want to reveal himself but instead decides to get to know his “children” clandestinely. Vaughn is apparently into making sentimentally amiable movies now, with little of the edge of his earlier work. That’s cool…I can dig it. Delivery Man wasn’t what I was expecting and certainly isn’t the type of notable film that we’ll all fondly recall a decade from now, but it has a level of charmingly benign appeal that didn’t make me feel like I wasted my time & money.

 

We’re the Millers

The track record of Saturday Night Live alumni in feature films is hit & miss at best. Eddie Murphy, Chevy Chase, Billy Crystal, Will Ferrell, Bill Murray, & Adam Sandler have all done pretty well for themselves. Conversely, Dana Carvey, Chris Kattan, Norm Macdonald, Tim Meadows, Kevin Nealon, & David Spade have all crashed & burned at the box office to a large degree. So, what about Jason Sudeikis?? Well, he’s only been away from the SNL nest for less than a year and has been a feature player in just a few movies so the jury is still out but this one…about a small time pot dealer who pieces together a fake family to assist him in smuggling a big load of weed from Mexico into the USA…is the best of the lot so far. Jennifer Aniston is still as smokin’ now at age 44 as she was two decades ago when Friends first became Must See TV. Ed Helms is dependably amusing as an odd drug lord. Emma Roberts (daughter of Eric, niece of Julia) has grown into a lovely young woman and competent actress. Newcomer Will Poulter is quite funny as the goofball neighbor/fake son. Once again I’m not sure there’s anything all that memorable here, but it’s a pleasant enough diversion that provides a few chuckles.

 

The Great Gatsby

F. Scott Fitzgerald’s classic 1925 novel has only been adapted into a movie a half dozen times. In comparison Mark Twain’s famous 19th century tale The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn has been translated into about two dozen films. There is a reason for the disparity. Fitzgerald’s story of self-indulgence & duplicity is difficult to tell on the big screen. I think that’s because the allure of the book is the author’s well written prose. The characters themselves aren’t all that exceptional, and the plot is really just another love triangle (or two). I have no issue with Leonardo DiCaprio’s portrayal of Gatsby. In fact I can’t offer any ideas as to who could’ve done it better. The rest of the cast is more subpar that I would have preferred, but that isn’t a big deal. The nit I would pick is with the choices of director Baz Luhrmann, best known for the atrocious 1996 adaptation of Romeo & Juliet that featured more gun violence than a military coup, and 2001’s Moulin Rouge which I have never seen. The anachronistic rap music is weird and the CGI mildly disturbing. I would have loved to have seen this script and this cast directed by someone more interested in telling a story than creating a visual spectacle. Still though, overall this is a decent flick and I will probably watch it again at some point down the line.

 

 

And the Sammy goes to…..

 

 

Star Trek: Into Darkness. First let me make a couple of statements. I star-trek-into-darkness-crothink 2013 was a relatively weak year at the box office. There just weren’t any films that blew me away, and several that disappointed me to some degree. Secondly, there are atleast 3 or 4 movies in theaters right now that I wanted to see but just didn’t find the time. I’ll see them all eventually but obviously it’ll be too late for them to qualify for a Sammy Award. As for Into Darkness, I enjoy having Trek back in the cineplex and didn’t mind the homage to Wrath of Khan in the least. JJ Abrams is a capable director who will hopefully do good things for the Star Wars revival. I haven’t seen any indication as to who might helm the next Trek movie but with a terrific cast, a loyal audience, and an entire galaxy of story ideas whomever takes the gig will be in an enviable position.

 

dungyTo present our final award of the night it is a profoundbezos honor for The Manofesto to welcome retired NFL player & coach and current analyst for NBC’s Sunday Night Football Tony Dungy and the founder & CEO of one of the world’s great websites Amazon.com Jeff Bezos. And the nominees are:

 

 

 

Biggest News Story

 

The Sequester

Or as it is official known the budget sequestration of 2013. They were automatic budget cuts of more than $85 billion that went into effect in March (after some wheelin’ & dealin’ got them delayed from January). Economics was never really my thing. The only thing I know is that I’m still paying over $3/gallon for gasoline as compared to about half that before President Obama took office. That is my economic reality.

 

IRS Scandal

The IRS has always been an evil entity within the malevolent force that is the federal government and in 2013 that became crystal clear. It came to light that under the Obama Administration the IRS had been targeting certain groups based on their beliefs. In other words conservative organizations were being harassed by the feds. That Obama…he’s a real class act.

 

Boston Marathon Bombings

On April 15, 2013, just as the 117th Boston marathon was concluding, two bombs later found to have been crafted out of pressure cookers exploded near the finish line. Three people were killed and 264 others were injured…many of them quite seriously. The bombers were two Muslim brothers from the Russian region Chechnya. A massive manhunt throughout Boston eventually concluded with one of the bombers killed by police and the other one in jail. Well…the hospital and then jail. Apparently the two had plans to move on to New York City and bomb Times Square. Thank God that didn’t happen. Yeah…Islam is a peaceful religion. And monkeys are going to fly out of my butt, pay my rent, and solve all the world’s problems.

 

Benghazi

If memory serves me correctly this story was nominated last year as well. However, since the attack on the U.S. embassy in Libya occurred in September 2012 the story naturally carried over into 2013. The leftist drive-by media has continued their unwavering effort to minimize the whole thing, while legitimate pundits and news agencies have continued to ask questions. Congress is supposedly investigating but I have no faith that they’ll get the job done right. The scary thing is that the incompetent twit at the center of the controversy (one of them anyway)…former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton…will likely be a strong presidential contender in 2016.

 

3D Printer Creates An Ear

Last February scientists at Cornell University re-created a human ear using a 3D printer and some living cells. Well…isn’t that creepy.

 

George Zimmerman Trial

Zimmerman is the neighborhood watch volunteer that was arrested after shooting & killing teen Trayvon Martin just outside Orlando, FL in the spring of 2012. Martin’s trial commenced in the early days of last summer and the jury’s decision was announced on July 13, 2013. Zimmerman was found not guilty of both 2nd degree murder and manslaughter, the jury having seemed to have accepted Zimmerman’s claim that he shot the young man in self-defense. The whole case had taken on a racial tone early on and the aftermath of the not guilty verdict was no different. The usual suspects, like ”Reverends” Al Sharpton & Jesse Jackson, tried to fan the flames of ethnic & cultural discord, but I don’t think anyone outside of a handful of vacuous celebrities and of course the hardcore leftist media really bought into that poppycock. Musician Stevie Wonder said that he would never perform in Florida again, but since I don’t live in Florida and Stevie is a 60 year old blind man I’ll give him a pass. My Cherie Amour and Overjoyed are two of my favorite songs. One of the Wayans brothers (there are so many of them) went on a hilariously stupid Twitter rant, but I think he was just bored since the entire Wayans family hasn’t had a job for a decade or more. Ironically it has been Zimmerman himself who has cast the most doubt as to whether the verdict may have been wrong because…well…he just doesn’t seem to be very smart. In the 6 months since the verdict Zimmerman has had several run-ins with law enforcement, mostly due to domestic altercations with his wife and girlfriend. Yes apparently he has both.

 

A New Pope

Last February Pope Benedict XVI announced his retirement after just 8 years, making him the first pope in nearly 600 years to resign. A month later Pope Francis ascended to the throne…or whatever it is that popes do. I’m not Catholic so who the pope is and what he does holds very little interest in The Manoverse. However, having said that, it does seem that…from various things I’ve read and heard…Pope Francis leans a little to the left on some socioeconomic issues. But like I said I really don’t care. Your mileage may vary.

 

Obamacare

Oh where to begin?? The Patient Protection and Affordable Care Act was signed into law by President Obama in 2010 and upheld by The Supreme Court in 2012, but it didn’t start being phased into reality until 2013…and it is exactly the disaster that the 49% of us who didn’t vote for President Obama knew it would be. The powers-that-be can’t even design a website that works so people can sign up for Obamacare, so how exactly do they plan to execute the plan itself?? Folks were sold a bill of goods, thinking that government health care was going to be low cost or even free, but the truth is that most people are going to be paying much much more for a lower standard of care. Obamacare is the exact opposite of freedom. It will allow the federal government to, in essence, decide whether you live or die, and the very people who have pushed this fraud on the unsuspecting populace have cleverly made themselves exempt from the rules they expect the rest of us to follow. The optimistic part of me would like to think that Obamacare will eventually be repealed and slip quietly into the annals of history as one of the biggest hoaxes ever perpetrated on American voters, but I have a feeling we have a long hard road ahead of us before that happens.

 

Oklahoma Tornado

On May 20, 2013 Moore, OK…between Norman and Oklahoma City…was struck by an F5 tornado with winds of 210mph. Two dozen people were killed and nearly 400 others injured. The tornado was on the ground for nearly 40 minutes and caused $2 billion in damages.

 

Egyptian Military Coup

There was another coup in the Middle East?? What a shocker. I assume that most Americans (including me) have more detailed knowledge of the NFL playoffs or the latest Sandra Bullock movie that the ongoing strife in the Middle East. Does that make us bad people??

 

Russian Meteor

Imagine it’s a lovely yet frigid February day. You’re driving home from your job at the vodka factory and in your peripheral vision you see something streaking across the sky. Immediately you have flashbacks from every disaster flick you’ve ever seen. Aerosmith’s 1998 smash hit I Don’t Want to Miss a Thing starts ringing in your head as you tearfully put your hand up to the glass and begin to miss your father. You wish that Morgan Freeman really was the president and could soothe your fear by telling you that “Cities fall, but they are rebuilt. Heroes die, but they are remembered. The water receded, so now let us begin.” Then you snap out of your daydream and realize “Holy crap…this is real.” Folks in Chelyabinsk, Russia experienced this reality. Fortunately the meteor was harmless even though 1500 people did receive minor injuries.

 

Government Shutdown

For the first half of October 2013 the federal government was shutdown. I don’t mean to minimize everything that that entails, but let’s be honest. Did most of us even notice?? This kind of thing happens every few years. The President and Congress play a game of chicken, the media acts like the world is ending, and us regular folks get up & go to work and keep doing what we have to do to keep a roof over our head and put food on the table. At zero hour some sort of compromise is reached, both sides claim credit, and we continue to go to work, pay the bills, and bring home the bacon. Rinse & repeat.

 

PRISM & Edward Snowden

20 or 30 years ago this would have been a huge story, but in 21st century New America the masses have become so jaded that virtually nothing is all that surprising anymore. Snowden was a computer geek for the CIA and National Security Agency. Last spring he leaked a plethora of classified documents to news agencies around the world. These documents detailed various mass surveillance projects run by the NSA, including PRISM, a data mining operation that basically means the feds are watching a lot of what you & I are doing online. They could be perusing this awards show right now (c-r-e-e-p-y). Anyway, Snowden fled the country and is currently holed up somewhere in Russia. Much like Paulie in The Godfather, I suspect that we ain’t gonna see him around here no more. Some consider him a traitor, some think he is a patriot. I am undecided on whether Edward Snowden is a hero or a villain, but I know that I am certainly uncomfortable knowing that the modern U.S. government’s idea of freedom seems to differ substantially from what The Founding Fathers had in mind.

 

 

 

And the Sammy goes to…..

 

 

Obamacare, Boston Marathon Bombings, & The Zimmerman Trial.George-Zimmerman Have we ever had a three way tie at The Sammy Awards?? I don’t recall and I’m too lazy to check The Vault. At any rate, I can’t really add anything more than what I’ve already said about these stories. When the history books look at 2013 I believe these are the three topics that will stand out ObamaSmokingas the most significant. Hopefully we will never have to live thru the horror of anything even remotely close to the Boston Marathon Bombings ever again, but that is probably a combination of wishful thinking and naiveté. I think Obamacare will continue to be a bmdominant story in 2014 and I just wish that the truths that so many are learning now would have been exposed on a wider scale before the 2012 election. I have a sneaking suspicion that, despite the gift of freedom that George Zimmerman was given, he will screw it up and ultimately land in jail anyway.

*****************************************************************

 

rip

film critic Roger Ebert…former British Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher…legendary sports broadcasters Pat Summerall & Ken Venturi…comedian Jonathan Winters…pro wrestling personality William Moody (aka Paul Bearer, aka Percival Pringle III)…authors Vince Flynn, Elmore Leonard, Tom Clancy, & Richard Ben Cramer…famed psychologist Dr. Joyce Brothers…actors Peter O’Toole (Lawrence of Arabia), Lou Myers (A Different World), Conrad Bain (Diff’rent Strokes), James Gandolfini (The Sopranos), Allan Arbus (M*A*S*H), Richard Griffiths (Harry Potter), Milo O’Shea (The Dream Team, Opportunity Knocks), Cory Monteith (Glee), Joe Conley (The Waltons), Paul Walker (The Fast and the Furious), James Avery (The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air), Henry Polic II (Webster), & Dennis Farina (Law & Order, Midnight Run, Crime Story)…”journalist” Helen Thomas…LA Lakers owner Dr. Jerry Buss…former NY City mayor Ed Koch…retired PGA golfer Miller Barber…singers George Jones, Patty Andrews (The Andrews Sisters), Bobby Bland, Mindy McCready, Patti Page, Lou Reed, Richie Havens, Eydie Gormé, Ray Price, & Slim Whitman…former U.S. Surgeon General C. Everett Koop…Tennessee Titans owner Bud Adams…legendary British writer & TV host David Frost…former NBC News anchor John Palmer…retired pro football coaches Jack Pardee, Bum Phillips, & Chuck Fairbanks…actresses Jeanne Cooper (The Young & the Restless), Bonnie Franklin (One Day at a Time), Esther Williams (Ziegfeld Follies), Annette Funicello (Mickey Mouse Club), Jean Stapleton (All in the Family), Joan Fontaine (Rebecca, Suspicion), & Marcia Wallace (The Bob Newhart Show)…political activist Nelson Mandela…musicians Ray Manzarek (The Doors), Van Cliburn, & Ed Shaughnessy (The Tonight Show’s NBC Orchestra)…end of the world enthusiast Harold Camping…retired college football coach Don James…director Hal Needham (Smokey & the Bandit, Cannonball Run)…baseball Hall of Famers Stan Musial & Earl Weaver…Christian author Brennan Manning…former NBA scouting guru Marty Blake…music producer Phil Ramone…retired boxers Carl “The Truth” Williams, Tommy Morrison, & Ken Norton Sr.…talk radio pioneer Bob Grant…pro wrestlers Reid Flair (son of “Nature Boy” Ric Flair), Mark Starr, Jackie Fargo, Matt Borne, Cousin Luke, & Hector Garza…U.S. Senator (New Jersey) Frank Lautenberg…rapper Chris Kelly (Kriss Kross)…NFL referee Jerry Seeman…TBN founder Paul Crouch…retired NASCAR driver Dick Trickle…former NFL stars LC Greenwood, Chuck Muncie, Deacon Jones, Dave Jennings, Art Donovan, Thomas Howard, Rev. Ken “The Hutch” Hutcherson, & Jack Butler…Jeanne Phillips (the original Dear Abby)… writer & producer Gary David Goldberg (Family Ties)…NBA Hall of Famer Walt Bellamy…retired astronaut Scott Carpenter…former Speaker of the House Tom Foley…surround sound innovator Ray Dolby