TOP 100 BOOKS OF ALL TIME (ALLEGEDLY, BUT PROBABLY NOT) – The Conclusion

If you’re late to the party…no worries. Just go here, here, and here to catch up, then rejoin us right here.

I’ve done the math. Of the hundred books on this list there are 38 that I have read or want to read eventually. There are 32 that I have absolutely no interest in whatsoever. And most interesting…atleast to me…is that there are 33 books, or about 1/3 of a list of ostensibly greatest of all time, that I’ve never heard of in my half century on the planet. Now, I’ve never claimed to be a top flight intellectual. I’m just a middle class dude in Appalachia with a college education that’s never done me much good, who has made more than enough poor choices and run into my fair share of misfortune. To paraphrase Marlon Brando, I could’ve been a contender…I could’ve been somebody. What might have been will haunt me til my dying day. However, having said all of that, I have a difficult time believing that a ranking like this has nearly three dozen books totally unknown to me.

76 The Hobbit / JRR Tolkien

The final installation of this exercise is off to a great start!! I freakin’ love The Hobbit. Pay no attention to the subpar movies and just read the damn book!!

77 The Man Without Qualities / Robert Musil

Two red flags…a “modernist” novel written in Germany (cause we all know how delightfully fun those wacky Germans are). Also, it spans multiple volumes and nearly 2000 pages. No way. Not happening.

78 Tristram Shandy / Laurence Sterne

It is a “autobiography ” of a completely fictional character set in 18th century France. That just doesn’t sound the least bit interesting to me.

79 JR / William Gaddis

Described as a satirical farce in which a Long Island 6th grader gets rich trading penny stocks thru the mail. It’s a huge 700+ page book, but I am intrigued.

80 As I Lay Dying / William Faulkner

More Faulkner. Described as “a grim yet darkly humorous pilgrimage” in which a dead woman’s family sets out to fulfill her dying wish to be buried in her hometown. I think I’ll give it a whirl.

81 Steppenwolf / Hermann Hesse

First things first…yes, the 70’s rock band known for hits like Magic Carpet Ride & Born to Be Wild DID take their name from the book, which is cool. In German a steppe wolf is another name for a grey wolf native to the Caspian Sea, the world’s largest inland body of water that borders both Russia & Iran. The novel is described as “one man’s spiritual journey towards self-knowledge”, with the framing device of a book within a book. It’s pretty short, and I am inclined to check it out.

82 Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland / Lewis Carroll

Did I read it as a child?? Probably. I feel like I have a basic knowledge of the plot. Should I read it again as an adult?? Would that be weird, given the fact that I don’t have kids of my own??

83 The Name of the Rose / Umberto Eco

An Italian murder mystery published in 1980 when I was 8 years old. I’ve never heard of it, and since it’s around 600 pages the likelihood of me caring enough to read it is doubtful.

84 Republic / Plato

I always get the Greek philosophers mixed up. The author of this book, Plato, learned from Socrates then went on to teach Aristotle. Philosophy. Ethics. Politics. All subjects that interest me in small doses, but if I haven’t read the whole book by now it is unlikely that I will.

85 The Confessions / St. Augustine

Saint Augustine of Hippo was a 4th century philosopher & theologian in Northern Africa. It is an autobiographical story about the author’s troubled youth & his spiritual growth. It’s one of those books that part of me feels like I should read, but I’m not sure if I can persuade myself to do so.

86 Wuthering Heights / Emily Brontë

Much like the Greek philosophers, I tend to get the Brontë sisters confused. Emily wrote this one, which is about love, class warfare, & revenge. I’m not sure it’s my cup o’ tea, but it is rather short so I’ll give it a go someday.

87 If On a Winter’s Night, A Traveler / Italo Calvino

Never heard of it. Weird title. It’s a book about a guy trying to read a book, which is very meta. Absolutely nothing about this revs my engine.

88 The Pale King / David Foster Wallace

Wallace’s story intrigues me, but I think I’ll tackle Infinite Jest and be happy with that. An unfinished novel by definition shouldn’t be put on a pedestal simply due to tragic circumstances. I mean, really…it’s not finished 👀.

89 The Tunnel / William H. Gass

I can tell that the readers responsible for these rankings are young since several books emanate from the 1980’s onward. That’s not a criticism, just an observation. The Tunnel was published in 1995, though I’d never heard of it until now. It sounds…complex, but not in a good way. I believe my time is better spent on other things.

90 A Hero of Our Time / Mikhail Lermontov

How many Russian novelists are there?!?!?!?? Atleast this dude isn’t as verbose as Tolstoy & Dostoevsky, but I’m still not interested.

91 The Aeneid / Virgil

It’s like the RC Cola of epic poems. Let me get thru The Iliad & The Odyssey (maybe) and perhaps I’ll give this one a whirl.

92 A Clockwork Orange / Anthony Burgess

The 1971 Kubrick movie is probably more well-known. I tend to go against the crowd though, so I am more likely to read the book.

93 Kafka on the Shore / Haruki Murakami

I’m a little surprised that Murakami’s more recent IQ84 didn’t make the cut, although it is a much lengthier work. Both books are high on my list, and I’ll get around to them eventually.

94 Nausea / Jean-Paul Sartre

What an odd title for a philosophy book. I am somewhat intrigued that it “comprises the thoughts and subjective experiences of a melancholy and socially isolated intellectual” who is experiencing “growing alienation and disillusionment”. I can’t lie…that speaks to me. I’m tempted to call it a maybe.

95 King Lear / William Shakespeare

I’d have thought that Shakespeare would earn more than two spots on this list. It is one of his best plays though. I studied it in college and have seen stage performances. Trust me though…it’s not for the faint of heart.

96 Beyond Good & Evil / Friedrich Nietzsche

Nietzsche has made his presence known in these rankings. It is short, and I wish I would’ve challenged myself to read it three decades ago because it’s just not something that piques my interest at this stage of my life.

97 The Elementary Particles / Michel Houellebecq

A French novel published in 1998. These are very Millenial-centric rankings. Given the title I assumed it had something to with science, but I’m wrong. Why are so many of the protagonists in these books depressed or otherwise mentally ill?? My life has enough melancholy without reading about sadness for fun.

98 Candide / Voltaire

Here we go again!! The protagonist experiences “slow and painful disillusionment” and “great hardships in the world”. Conversely, I just want to relax, have some lighthearted fun, and laugh a little. Is that too much to ask??

99 Jerusalem / Alan Moore

Don’t let the title fool you…it’s a 2016 novel set in England. How in the hell does a book published less than a decade ago rank as one of the best books of all time?!?!?? That’s dumb.

100 Harry Potter / JK Rowling

As mundane & erudite as these rankings have been I am shocked to see something as mainstream popular as Harry Potter make the list. It’s a pleasant surprise though because they are in fact great books. If you’re one of those people who has only watched the movies, a Christian who thinks Jesus will be mad at you for embracing sorcery, or someone who was older than a teenager when PotterMania was running wild so you think it’s adolescent balderdash, then I urge you to reconsider. It’s a big commitment…seven lengthy books…but worth every second of your time.

Top 100 Books of All Time (Allegedly, But Probably Not) – Part 1

/lit/ is apparently a discussion board on something called 4chan, which, if I understand correctly, is an Internet community. I don’t know folks…I’m old. I pretty much stick to Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter, with Wikipedia in the mix as well. Anyway, /lit/ does an annual Favorite Books list based on polling of its users, and I stumbled upon this aggravate list, which is based on cumulative results from 2014-20. I find the rankings fascinating, and have been pondering use it as a jumping off point. For what?? Well, that is to be determined, though I will provide more context going forward. For now I have decided to simply provide my gut reaction to each book, some of which I am quite familiar, while several others I’ve never even heard of before now. I’m a pretty open minded guy though, so perhaps this project will lead to some impactful entertainment.

1 Moby Dick / Herman Melville

I read it in high school and didn’t hate it. I wouldn’t mind reading it again, although my time might be spent more wisely with new material rather than rereading a book that didn’t really impact me much in the first place.

2 The Brothers Karamozov / Fyodor Dostoevsky

I have it. It came as part of a Great Books collection I spent way too much money on that I didn’t really have many years ago. I find Russian literature challenging, and at 50 years old I’m kind of past making myself do anything unnecessary just to impress anyone. Never say never though.

3 Ulysses / James Joyce

May I contradict myself?? Ulysses is thought by many to be one of the most difficult books to read & interpret…but I’d actually like to give it a whirl. How far can I get?? Stay tuned.

4 Infinite Jest / David Foster Wallace

I actually have a copy of Infinite Jest sitting on the desk beside me. Procrastination has always been a character flaw, and quite frankly I am intimidated by everything I’ve heard about Infinite Jest. However, I am equally fascinated by its place as a modern classic, since it was actually written in the 1990s & the author wasn’t that much older than me. Sadly Wallace suffered from depression and hung himself at the age of 46 in 2008. It’d be less than honest if I told you that part of the equation didn’t intrigue me just a bit.

5 Lolita / Vladimir Nabokov

It is my understanding that it is one of the more controversial books of the 20th century, with the narrator being a middle aged professor who has an inappropriate relationship with a young girl. That sounds like a train wreck that one should look away from but can’t stop staring at. I’m sure a psychologist could explain our fascination with such things.

6 Crime & Punishment / Fyodor Dostoevsky

Another Russian novel that I own but really feel no pull to actually read. Kudos to Dostoevsky though…two books in the Top 10 is impressive.

7 Gravity’s Rainbow / Thomas Pynchon

I’m intrigued by the title. Is that odd?? I am also interested to see another book actually written in my lifetime (1973) show up, versus novels written centuries ago.

8 Don Quixote / Miguel de Cervantes

It’s a huge book…over 800 pages. There was a time in my life when I could blow thru something like that in a week, but those days are long gone. Still, I’d like to give it a whirl because everything I’ve heard indicates that it’s a really cool read.

9 Blood Meridian / Cormac McCarthy

Though written in 1985 it is set in the mid-1800s. I’d be more inclined to read it if it was actually set in 1985. McCarthy is probably best known for writing No Country For Old Men in 2005, a book that was adapted into a film that won the Academy Award for Best Picture a few years later. I have zero interest in that film, which makes me wonder if Blood Meridian would frost my cupcake.

10 Stoner / John Williams

This is the first book on the list that I’ve never heard of, and after reading a little about it I think I understand why. The first thing you should know is that it’s not what you might think it is given the title. It’s not about that at all. To be honest the description sounds rather boring, so I doubt I’ll waste my time.

11 The Holy Bible / God

I realize that The Bible can be viewed thru the prism of great literature, but that’s not what it’s about in my eyes. Do I need to do a better job of studying God’s Word?? Absolutely. However, I don’t view it the same as reading novels.

12 The Stranger / Albert Camus

I actually own a copy of The Stranger. I don’t remember when or why I got it, but it’s a short book that I will be tackling in the near future.

13 The Trial / Frank Kafka

Kafka is an interesting dude. There is actually a term…kafkaesque…which means “having a nightmarishly complex, bizarre, or illogical quality”. The Trial is amongst his best known works, and tells the story of a man who is arrested but has no idea why. I have a vague recollection of beginning to read the book but not finishing it, which sadly is not unusual for me. I thought I had a copy but can’t find it, so I might have to reinvest because the premise is intriguing.

14 The Divine Comedy / Dante Alighieri

I am intrigued, but…it isn’t a novel, it’s a narrative poem. I’m not really a poetry guy, and y’all know the deal with teaching old dogs new tricks. Still, Dante is a paisan, and though it’s a long book I’ve read lengthier stuff in the past. It is a challenge that holds a certain level of interest. We’ll see.

15 Ficciones / Jorge Luis Borges

I’ve never heard of it, but it’s a book of short stories originally written in Spanish in the 1940’s & 50’s. It isn’t high on my priority list, but short stories do seem a little more palatable than committing to one super long book.

16 Anna Karenina / Leo Tolstoy

I wonder if Tolstoy & Dostoevsky had kind of a Frazier/Ali, Brady/Manning, Bird/Magic rivalry?? They were contemporaries in Russia. At any rate, it’s a book I may or may not get around to someday.

17 War & Peace / Leo Tolstoy

Of the two I am more likely to tackle this Tolstoy masterpiece first, although I’ve heard it’s a bit of a slog.

18 One Hundred Years of Solitude / Gabriel García Márquez

I am intrigued by the concept…a story that follows seven generations of the same family. If you’re one of those folks who’ve watched the same soap opera for decades you’ll understand the idea. It’s high on my list.

19 Dubliners / James Joyce

Other works by Joyce get more love, but I’ve heard good things about this little collection of short stories about life in Ireland around a century ago. I am inclined to learn more.

20 The Odyssey / Homer

I own a copy. I know it’s one of those books I am supposed to have read long ago. However, it isn’t a novel, it’s an epic poem, which is defined as a “lengthy narrative poem typically about the extraordinary deeds of extraordinary characters who, in dealings with gods or other superhuman forces, gave shape to the mortal universe for their descendants”. The subject matter sounds cool, but poetry is supposed to be relatively short. If you’re going to write an “epic” why not do it in a novel?? The format weirds me out. I realize that sounds goofy, but it’s the truth.

21 1984 / George Orwell

It has been many years since I read it, but given the state of the world nowadays a refresher may be worth the effort.

22 In Search of Lost Time / Marcel Proust

It is a seven volume novel, and I don’t know if I have the strength. According to my research it contains “recollections of childhood & experiences into adulthood in the late 19th/early 20th-century high society France, reflecting on the loss of time & lack of meaning in the world.” Sounds like a real laugh riot, huh?? To be honest I hadn’t really heard of it until I saw the 2006 comedy Little Miss Sunshine, in which a character calls Proust the greatest writer after Shakespeare. It’s a mountain part of me has interest in climbing, but it would take a level of commitment & focus I haven’t exhibited in a very long time.

23 Hamlet / William Shakespeare

Not only did we study Shakespeare in high school, but I took an entire class dedicated to his works in college. Here’s the thing about ol’ Willie Shakes though…his stuff is really better experienced the way it was originally intended…as live stage performances…rather than read as books. Having said that, Hamlet is terrific, and if you can’t catch a stage production it has been faithfully adapted on film a few times. You ought to give it a whirl.

24 The Iliad / Homer

I own a copy, but have I ever read it?? Not that I recall, although surely we skimmed it in high school, right?? It’s not a novel, it is another epic poem, and I think we’ve established my feelings on that. Never say never though.

25 Notes from Underground / Fyodor Dostoevsky

He’s back!! Really…three books in the Top 25 almost makes me want to give Dostoevsky a whirl. Almost.