Super Bowl

Winning & Musing…..Volume 2.11

What I refer to as the dark days of the sports calendar haven’t been too awfully depressing so far…..

My residual mourning and bitterness about the outcome of the Super Bowl are still fresh, so I cannot bring myself to be magnanimous quite yet. However, let me say just one thing. I am already tired of the sports media wringing their hands over whether or not Bret Favre has, has not, or will ever call, text, or otherwise convey a congratulatory message to QB Aaron Rodgers. Who cares?? Favre doesn’t owe Rodgers a damn thing, and if he did call him what he really should say is “Don’t get too cocky son. As good as your stats were the fact is the only reason you got to hold The Lombardi Trophy is because the Steelers gave the game away.” As much as I love ESPN, I think that sometimes they struggle to come up with topics for their plethora of shows (Mike & Mike, First Take, Around the Horn, Pardon the Interruption, et al). The Favre/Rodgers discussion has temporarily replaced the old “did Team A win the game or did Team B lose it” as the biggest time waster on “The Family of Networks”.

My abiding love for the game of football not withstanding, I am growing weary of the talk of impending doom vis a vis the possible NFL lockout. I suppose part of my disdain boils down to the fact that I am not an attorney and am not overly knowledgeable about economics, so unless & until both sides come to an agreement and just shut up & play I really don’t care. It is possible I will feel differently a few months from now, but by then…if the possibility of no pro football next fall becomes a more tangible prospect…my disinterest will evolve into anger & disappointment.

“Pitchers & catchers report”. It’s a phrase that signifies that baseball, and more importantly spring, are on the way. I am by no means as big of a baseball fan as I am die hard football fanatic, mostly because my lifelong connection to the Pittsburgh Pirates has eroded my affection for the game itself over the course of the past 17 years. And I suppose rampant cheating & drug abuse in the sport has destroyed too much of the pastoral mystique as well. But atleast I have a team to pull for, unlike my completely aloof semi-enjoyment of the NBA and total lack of interest in soccer, tennis, and any sport involving sweaty lesbians.

This has nothing to do with sports, but Bryce in Minnesota needs to freakin’ get over the crappy pizza he received from Domino’s and the CEO of the pizza giant needs to stop apologizing. Maybe if his parents would have named him something other than Bryce he’d be more of a man than to take a stupid photo of a pizza and send it to the company.

Conspiracy theorists are out in full force concerning Dale Earnhardt Jr. capturing the pole position for this coming weekend’s Daytona 500. I enjoy a good conspiracy theory even if they are illogical and soul-crushingly dumb. This one is harmless enough seeing as how the past ten pole winners haven’t won the race and Dale Jr., a total disappointment to the legacy of his father whose only trump card is his name, hasn’t won a race in nearly 3 years and there is no reason to believe he will win this Sunday. However, it does provide me an opportunity to mark the ten year anniversary of Dale Sr.’s tragic death. I remember vividly watching that race, seeing the crash on the final lap, and being happy for lovable loser Michael Waltrip, who is 1000% less annoying than his older brother Darrell. After the race I changed the channel and spent the rest of a lazy Sunday doing God knows what. I never gave a second thought to the wreck because I’d seen dozens…alot of them involving Earnhardt himself…that were so much worse. A couple of hours later I was surfing The Internet and saw a giant headline on ESPN.com that I believe just said “EARNHARDT DEAD”. I was stunned. I had been a meandering Nascar fan as far back as the early 80’s when I cheered for “The King” Richard Petty. After Petty’s retirement in 1992 I had to find a new favorite driver and by then, for a variety of reasons, I had gone through a personal metamorphosis that made the hardscrabble, rapacious, anti-hero persona that enveloped Earnhardt appealing. His death hit me surprisingly hard, and I was taken aback at how sad I became. Ten years later and thoughts of that day still feel like a punch to the gut. I am sure there are fans out there much more invested in the Nascar product than I that were affected even more deeply. So as we mark this significant anniversary I’ll just say that I am glad that much good, i.e. more extensive safety regulations that have undoubtedly saved countless lives, resulted from Dale Earnhardt’s death, but I miss his unique contribution to the sport and more importantly I miss what stock car racing used to be, a rough & tumble thrill ride with rich personality and an unrefined yet colorful edge, instead of the tedious corporate exercise in banality it has become.


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My Super Sunday

9:15am

I wake up woefully late and am not going to make it to church. I was up way too late for reasons that I won’t go into but I trust God understands.

 

11am

It is unlikely I am going anywhere today but there is a chance, so I decide to bathe.

 

11:30am

Bathing was exhausting. Time for a nap.

 

1pm

I love Super Sunday counter programming. There is a lot of great stuff about food on The History Channel today.

 

3pm

The time has come to decide whether to watch the game at home or venture out to a local establishment for the festivities. My preference would be to attend a party at someone’s home with friends, but I really don’t have any friends, atleast not locally. I am the token cripple that folks generally believe to be a nice guy but don’t actually try to get to know, spend time with, or invite anywhere. I have decided to stop hating this and embrace becoming a recluse. People annoy me anyway.

 

3:30

Speaking of annoying, Facebook is really pissing me off today. Too many Steeler haters and Packer bandwagon jumpers. I have deleted the feed of atleast a half dozen people. Yes, I take my football very seriously.

 

4:30pm

I notice that Papa John’s has an ad on their website saying that they will be awarding a free pizza every 45 seconds. I haven’t ordered Papa John’s in a very long time (my deep affection for Domino’s chocolate lava cakes is hardcore), and it is unlikely that my 38 year streak of lousy luck will suddenly end, but I take a chance.

 

5pm

I finally decide to check out Fox’s pregame show and am greeted with the sight of Barack Hussein Obama. I’m already in a mood, so I change the channel to the golf tournament.

 

5:15pm

My not free Papa John’s arrives. Their wings are pretty tasty. Better than Domino’s anyway. If they had some sort of delicious chocolate dessert they could rule. I really need to stop eating any & all fast food, as I know I am overweight and unhealthy. But really, besides food and my dog what do I have to fill the meaningless empty void that is my life??

 

5:45pm

Terry Bradshaw picks the Steelers to win, while the rest of the talking heads pick Green Bay. One hopes Bradshaw’s pick was genuine and not an attempt to kiss the collective ass of Steeler Nation.

 

6pm

Reflecting back on my earlier decision to stay home instead of sit in some bar with a bunch of people I don’t know I realize I made the right call. I like hanging out with Rocco better anyway.

 

6:10pm

Sam Elliot?? Really Fox?? Way to appease that over 60 demographic lol.

 

6:19pm

I hate Glee, but the chick singing America the Beautiful is yummy and sings pretty good.

 

6:22pm

Christina Aguilera apparently needs remedial National Anthem 101. On the plus side she actually looks classy as opposed to a total whore.

 

6:27pm

Just deleted another feed on Facebook. How the hell did these people become “friends”?? I have nothing in common with them.

 

6:29pm

The coin toss with the newly elected members of the Pro Football Hall of Fame. Sadly neither Jerome Bettis or Dermontti Dawson were voted in this year. I can’t help but wonder…when Shannon Sharpe makes his induction speech will there be interpreters and subtitles?? The Packers win the toss but defer to the 2nd half. The Steelers get the ball first and I’d REALLY feel a lot better of they had an 8 minute drive that ended with a touchdown.

 

6:35pm

No such luck. 3 & out. Crap.

 

6:43pm

So far the commercials have been unsurprisingly mundane. There was a cute Doritos spot, but that’s just because Rocco is a pug so I am a sucker for anything pug related.

 

6:48pm

I am not a fan of throwing the ball on 3rd & 2. If you need two yards and you can’t ram it down their throats then you don’t deserve to be in the Super Bowl.

 

6:59pm

Green Bay scores the first TD. It occurs to me that Pittsburgh should spend atleast 3 draft picks in April on cornerbacks. This is by no means a new thought process…I’ve felt the same way for a few years.

 

7:06pm

Big Ben throws a Pick 6. I have a very bad feeling. I declare “game over” on Facebook.

 

7:07pm

Eminem is doing commercials now??

 

7:11pm

It has become obvious that Commandant Goodell let the stripes know there’d be a little extra something in their paychecks for making things more difficult for Pittsburgh.

 

7:16pm

Joan Rivers in a tank top. No one needs to see that.

 

7:23pm

Hold me closer Tony Danza.

 

7:30pm

WRs Emmanuel Sanders for Pittsburgh and Donald Driver for Green Bay are both injured. Advantage Steelers.

 

7:39pm

Roseanne Barr is no Betty White.

 

7:41pm

Roethlisberger is picked off again. Wow.

 

7:44pm

Green Bay scores another TD. 21-3 close to the half. I feel the strong urge to seek adult beverages.

 

7:49pm

Two things: A) Chevy Cruze allows one to stalk women on Facebook. Awesome, and B) Captain America looks like it might be a decent flick.

 

7:55pm

Roethlisberger throws to Hines Ward for a TD with less than a minute left in the half. Good things happen when half of Green Bay’s defensive backfield is in the locker room. 21-10 at halftime. I think I’ll change the channel since I’d rather hear Rocco snore than The Black-Eyed Peas sing.

 

8:02pm

Forrest Gump is on TNT. Yes!! My evening just got a little better. Now THIS is excellent competition for a crappy halftime show.

 

8:25pm

Lots of folks on Facebook are belittling the halftime show. Looks like I made a wise choice.

 

8:41pm

Rashard Mendenhall scores after the Steelers spend a drive proving that they can run against Green Bay. 21-17. Now, the question becomes, can the defense stop letting Aaron Rodgers look like Joe Montana?? The Terrible Towels are out. Game on.

 

8:58pm

Thanks for the jinx Joe Buck. Big Ben gets sacked, the Steelers miss a 52 yard field goal. Bad sequence.

 

9:23pm

After a some good defense & special teams Rashard Mendenhall fumbles. That’s three turnovers for the Steelers, which is very difficult to overcome.

 

9:29pm

Hey Steelers…the blitz ain’t working!! Cover the receivers!! Rodgers throws for another TD. Holy crap. Can Roethlisberger pull some magic out of the hat??

 

9:31pm

The storylines thus far: Steeler turnovers, Packer dropped balls, and not a single commercial anyone will remember three days from now. Also, where the heck is the real Troy Polamalu been??

 

9:41pm

Roethlisberger hits Mike Wallace for a touchdown and then gets a pitch to Antwaan Randle-El for the 2 point conversion. 28-25 with 7 and a half minutes left. The Steelers’ calling card…dating all the way back to The Steel Curtain 35 years ago…has always been d-e-f-e-n-s-e. Now would be the time to validate that.

 

9:54pm

After getting torched on a few pass plays the Steelers hold Green Bay to a field goal. 31-25 with just over 2 minutes left. Pittsburgh has one time out remaining. Big Ben can either end this thing with a bang or a wimper.

 

10:03pm Wimper…..

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Super Bowl XLV (That’s 45 For Those In Mingo County)

What a weird Super Bowl it’s been so far. Strange. Odd. Peculiar.

And we’re still 2 days away from the actual game.

I am not a big fan of the two week build-up to the Super Bowl. The hype, the over analysis, the “human interest” stories to fill time…it’s just a bit too much, even for die hard football fans. However, I must admit to having found the past couple of weeks…shockingly…not all that obnoxious.

If you are looking for an objective examination of the world’s biggest football game you are in the wrong place. I have been a hardcore Pittsburgh Steelers partisan for over 30 years. Come this Sunday I will be sitting in front of a TV somewhere intently watching every snap of the ball. If the Steelers win I will be ecstatic, if they lose…not so much. But before we get to the final result or even kickoff it must be said that while the two weeks of hoopla hasn’t been as tedious as one might normally expect that doesn’t mean it hasn’t been objectionable in a way that was somewhat unexpected.

Let’s look at some facts & figures. Team A finished the season with a 12-4 record, won their division, had the #2 defense in football, won 2 out of the past 5 Super Bowls, has almost 30 players with Super Bowl experience, and dominated their opponent in the conference title game before letting up a little and allowing the final score to become closer than it should have been. Team B went 10-6, did not win their division, has the #5 ranked defense, barely won the conference championship game against an opponent forced to use a 3rd string quarterback, and has a grand total of two players who have played in a Super Bowl. Would it surprise any knowledgeable fan that Team B is favored to win the game?? It sure as hell shocked me.

Team A, of course, = the Steelers, while Team B is the Packers. Are the Packers a good football team?? Obviously. But why in the world are they the favorite?? And why are they getting so much love from an overwhelming majority of talking heads and media types?? The numbers simply don’t back up what The Hype Machine is trying to sell. So then the question becomes “What is the agenda??” Well, if I may borrow a phrase, I think what we have here is a little social concern. The media and the NFL are very desirous that a certain quarterback NOT do well.

I am not here to defend Ben Roethlisberger or excuse him from any past mistakes. However, I find it heinously offensive that there has been an obvious effort, one in which I believe the suits in the NFL office and their friends at ESPN and other outlets of sports “journalism” have both been complicit, to marginalize Roethlisberger specifically and to a lesser extent his team in general. I have never seen a recent two time Super Bowl champion treated with such disrespect in my life. Would the New England Patriots have been underdogs against Green Bay?? How about the New York Jets?? The Baltimore Ravens?? No, no, and no. But you know what those three teams have in common?? None of them are representing the AFC in the Super Bowl…the Pittsburgh Steelers are. And NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell can’t stand it. Neither can ESPN or Fox because they don’t want to alienate the female or metrosexual demographic by saying positive things about Ben Roethisberger. The solution has been a hard sell in which fans have been duped into believing that the Green Bay Packers are some sort of combination of the 1985 Chicago Bears and the 1972 Miami Dolphins with a little of the St. Louis Rams’ Greatest Show on Turf thrown in for good measure. Sadly it is a storyline that many are eating up. At first I was even a little concerned. The Steelers’ defensive backfield has needed an upgrade for years and it seems plausible that a pass oriented team could torch their average at best cornerbacks. On top of that their starting center will not play in the game leaving a backup to deal with Green Bay’s huge nose tackle. These things had me worried. But then I woke up.

One point of comparison that has been used for several days is a 2009 matchup between these same two teams in the regular season. It is difficult to rely on such evidence because so much changes in the NFL every year. Teams go from worst to first, from contenders to pretenders almost literally overnight. Coaches come and go. Free agents change teams, new players rise up, and once great players lose their mojo. However, Green Bay and Pittsburgh aren’t all that different than a year ago, so that game is interesting to examine. The Steelers defeated the Packers 37-36 in a shootout that likely made Vince Lombardi and Chuck Noll roll over in their graves (except for the fact that Coach Noll isn’t dead yet). But take a closer look. First of all, Pittsburgh was up 24-14 going into the 4th quarter before Green Bay exploded for 22 points. Secondly, Pittsburgh’s best player, safety Troy Polamalu did not play in that game. A safety isn’t normally much of a difference maker, but over the past two years the Steelers have won 80% of the games Polamalu has participated while losing 60% of the games in which he was on the sideline. Also, Green Bay will not have the services of tight end Jermichael Finley in the Super Bowl. Finley, who has been out for most of this season with a knee injury, had 9 receptions for 74 yards and a touchdown in that game. A real effort has been made this week to put Packers’ QB Aaron Rodgers on the same lofty pedestal as Tom Brady and Peyton Manning, but the truth is that Big Ben outgunned Rodgers in that previous head to head tilt. I’ve even seen Rodgers referred to as “a football god”, which made me want to concurrently laugh and puke. Two weeks ago I really liked the Green Bay Packers, but I’ll be darned if all this unwarranted praise isn’t tempting me to loathe them on a Patriots/Cowboys/Ravens level.

The weather must be mentioned as well. While it will not factor into the game at all since the Cowboys’ billion dollar mega-stadium has a retractable roof that will be closed, it certainly adds to the weirdness factor. The Dallas/Fort Worth Metroplex has been besieged with snow and ice, and the temperatures this past week have been colder there than in Pittsburgh or Green Bay, poster cities for wintry weather. Algore blames global warming.

So, it seems that most are expecting another high scoring shootout in which neither team runs the ball effectively and Aaron Rodgers is anointed as the next Joe Montana in a ritualistic ceremony presided over by Jesus Christ, Dan Marino, Oprah, and Elvis while poor Ben Roethlisberger curls up in a fetal position at the 50 yard line cursing the day he ever boozed it up with college girls. But wait just a doggone minute. Not so fast my friends.

29 of the previous 44 Super Bowls have been won by 10 or more points. My vibe is that is where we are headed. Most are forecasting a tight game decided in the last minute or even in overtime by 3 or fewer points, but I disagree. I concur that neither team will mount much of a rushing attack and will not be surprised if neither runs for 100 yards, but I do look for time of possession to be important. I think there will be atleast 3 turnovers by the loser, with one of those being a Pick 6 for the defense. I believe special teams and field position will play a key role, but field goals won’t be a deciding factor. Aaron Rodgers is a very good quarterback but these media types need to get up off their knees and quit fellatiating him because President Obama is getting jealous. I am not at all excited about the halftime show featuring The Black-eyed Peas, but am hopeful that Christina Aguilera will do a nice job with the national anthem. Ample cleavage would be a bonus. I am sure there will be some amusing commercials but most of them will range from forgettable to horrendous, although I am excited to see the trailers for Captain America and Thor. At the end of the day this game is all about the X Factor, the intangibles, the undefinable je ne sais quoi. And while Green Bay has a little of that, at the end of the day the Pittsburgh Steelers have more of it. It will be a huge pleasure to see that assclown Commissioner Goodell be forced to hand Ben Roethlisberger the Super Bowl MVP award after the Steelers win the game 34-13. That’s my story, your mileage may vary.

 

 

 

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Winning & Musing…..Volume 1.11

The inaugural edition of the Winning & Musing finds us close to one of the saddest times of the year…the end of another football season.

First let me congratulate the Auburn Tigers on winning the NCAA National Championship. I have my opinions on why and how college football should have a playoff, but for now we are stuck with the BCS and I must admit that once again it worked about as well as it can. Did undefeated TCU get the shaft?? Probably. Could Stanford and Wisconsin have come out on top if given the opportunity?? Maybe. But at the end of the day the two teams that the majority would agree were most deserving met in the big game. It didn’t quite play out as expected and wasn’t as exciting as we’d all hoped, but it was a decent enough contest.

For those who might be wondering, and without diving into a detailed breakdown & analysis, I went 16-19 in my bowl picks. When I was on I was dead on, and when I was off I was way way off.

I cannot leave college football without one last plea to whomever from the NCAA might happen to be reading. Can we PLEASE eliminate some of these bowl games?? You don’t want to have a playoff?? Fine. But atleast implement one part of my Plan to Save College Football (find it in The Archives). 6-6 teams should not play in the post-season, bowl season should end on New Year’s Day or atleast by the 2nd or 3rd of January, and some of these bowl names are utterly horrendous. I didn’t bother to look at TV ratings, but I don’t imagine anyone but the most die hard of football fans were interested in watching Middle Tennessee play Miami, OH in the GoDaddy.com Bowl on January 6th.

The matchup for Super Bowl XLV (that’s 45 for those of you in Mingo County) is set. It will be two of the NFL’s most historic franchises battling it out…the Pittsburgh Steelers vs. the Green Bay Packers. Vegas has made the Packers early 2.5 point favorites based on…well, apparently nothing tangible since Pittsburgh has been the better team all season. I cannot be a non-partisan voice of reason due to the fact that the success of the Pittsburgh Steelers is so high on my priority list that it ranks only below my own well being, my faith in God and my Lord & Savior Jesus Christ, and the safety & happiness of my puppy, but I really do find it amusing that so many people are jumping on the Packer bandwagon and overlooking the team that has won 2 out of the past 5 Super Bowls. That disrespect may just be the extra morsel of motivation my Steelers need.

Is it just me, or do the Lamar Hunt/George Halas trophies…given to the teams that win the conference championship in the AFC & NFC respectively…look like $20 pieces of aluminum one could buy at a kiosk in the middle of your local shopping mall??

Major League Baseball should take a close gander at this Super Bowl. Pittsburgh and Green Bay are among the smaller markets in the league, but that doesn’t matter. In the NFL all 32 teams begin the season with some slice of hope and enthusiasm because there is no pigskin version of the Yankees or Red Sox ready to buy a championship. It’s quite refreshing and much more entertaining for the fans. Are you paying attention Bud Selig?? Am I nuts, or am I just a disenfranchised Pirates fan??

Peace out Manoverse…..


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Random Thoughts 18

Congratulations to the Super Bowl Champion New Orleans Saints. The game did not play out like most expected, as Indianapolis Colts’ quarterback Peyton Manning looked quite average instead of like one of the greatest field generals of all time. The victory is good for the beleaguered city of New Orleans and I sincerely hope many benefits are reaped.

The re-entry sequence near the end of Apollo 13 deserves to be ranked right up there with the baptism scene from The Godfather and the “Dad” scene at the end of Field of Dreams as among the greatest movies moments of all time.

I have come to a spiritual crossroads. My faith and belief in God and in my Savior Jesus Christ is still there, but my patience with superficial Christian clichés has run out. I no longer desire church to be a shallow social gathering. At the same time, I see no value in being a humorless Bible thumper who can’t loosen up and have fun…others too easily disregard that person as an uptight, unhappy killjoy. I am on a journey seeking an authentic & devout relationship and I am not sure it is available in the places one would normally assume it can be found. Something inside me has either broken or been awakened (I’m not sure which) in the past few months, and my BS meter when it comes to religion is on high alert.

Even as a diehard conservative I am not really sold on Sarah Palin as a legit Presidential candidate, but the outright vitriol aimed in her direction by histrionic shit stirrers on the left is puzzling. Palin and former President George W. Bush have their flaws for sure, but how some can so completely eviscerate them almost daily while at the same time putting Barack Hussein Obama on the largest pedestal mankind has ever known is completely beyond all logical comprehension.

I would like to nominate ESPN’s Skip Bayless as the worst sports journalist in history. His arrogant and condescending attitude is off the charts, and his opinions are so often dead wrong that he has become a joke. I recently saw him trying to justify the possibility of 13-11 North Carolina being chosen as an at-large team for the NCAA tournament. He was dead serious about the Tar Heels being selected merely due to their history and pedigree over lesser known teams with better records. Not only did the debate prove him to be a complete fool, but it highlighted what can be very wrong with collegiate athletics when so much credit is given to a reputation and a perception instead of actual performance. Call it The Notre Dame Fallacy.

Valentine’s Day has to be the worst holiday on the calendar.

I love it when people act like they understand something when in reality they have absolutely no clue. It really makes them look silly. Mark Twain famously said it is “better to keep your mouth shut and be thought a fool than to open it and remove all doubt”. More people should follow that advice. And yes, I see the irony in a guy who writes a VERY opinionated blog espousing that philosophy.

Can we please dispense with the term “pro-choice”?? People who are pro-choice only believe in a woman’s right to choose if she ultimately chooses to have an abortion.

Speaking of BS…..

I accepted long ago the fact that it is very possible that I may someday be one of those people who is dead for several days and whose body is only discovered because the neighbor’s begin to notice a stench. This is because at some point it became very clear to me that very few people legitimately give a damn whether I live or die, which does not in any way make me special or unique…..it’s just the way we human beings treat each other nowadays.  So armed with this awareness, I have very little patience for petulant, bratty adults who act like whiny children in a desperate attempt to have their ego validated. Encounters with so-called adults make me ever more determined to fade into the background in a concerted effort to not draw attention to myself.

I like Nascar and I’m not ashamed to admit it.

 

Random Thoughts 17

I have developed a troubling fascination with the Kardashian reality show on E!. They are just so sincerely and hopelessly out of touch with the real world that it is sort of amusing.

 

Out of all the hundreds of types of people out there, I think I’ve decided the one I like the least are progressive hippie wannabes who fancy themselves 1960’s throwbacks.

 

What’s with America’s fascination with spicy food?? Everywhere you look restaurant food and grocery items are “fire grilled”, “molten lava”, “fiery”, “flame throwed”, and “volcanic”. Now I will admit I have whatever is the direct opposite of an iron stomach. I’ll need to run to the bathroom after writing this. But the increasing obsession to kick up our food to scorching levels of hotness seems a bit odd.

 

The History Channel show Life After People has to be one of the dumbest television programs of all time.

 

Fat free bologna does not fry very well.

 

I have a solution for overly rowdy fans at collegiate sports events, because no one should ever get away with throwing anything onto the field or court. Such behavior needs punished severely. If the perpetrator is a student then he or she is banned from attending any university sporting events for the remainder of their college career. If the person is an adult non-student then they are banned from all university sporting events for 10 years. The penalty for an adult is harsher because they should know better.

 

RIP author JD Salinger, author of infamous novel The Catcher In the Rye. I personally don’t see what the big deal is about the book, but I realize I am in the minority.

 

President Obama’s low blows against Vegas just make me want to want to go there even more.

 

Two weeks of hype for the Super Bowl is undeniably too much.

 

I had my wild party days in college. I drank plenty of beer and liquor. But I’m in my mid 30’s now and drinking on a regular basis holds no thrill for me. It kind of surprises me the number of my peers that seem to enjoy drinking like they are still college students. A lot of them are people with spouses and jobs and kids, yet they try so hard to be perpetually 19 years old. I find it a rather unflattering side to otherwise decent people. Are your lives so miserable that you have to dull the pain with alcohol?? Have a cola or an iced tea or some milk folks.

 

RIP as well to actress Frances Reid, who died at age 95 after portraying Alice Horton on the daytime soap opera Days of Our Lives for over 40 years. My sister and I had a babysitter that got us hooked on DOOL (and General Hospital) back in the early 1980’s. I’ve been watching ever since.

A Fair Review of My NFL Prognostications

When it rains it pours. Mere days after the always melancholy end to the Thanksgiving/Christmas/New Year’s corridor we call “The Holidays” the beginning of the end is here for football. Just a couple more college games remain, and the NFL regular season has concluded. The playoffs and Super Bowl will be fun and interesting in all likelihood, and knowing that football will pack it in just about a month from now and we’ll be entering into the darkest days of the sports calendar…those cold February days when Nascar hasn’t yet begun, golf is still two months away from The Masters, and college basketball hasn’t quite heated up…makes one want to savor every remaining snap of the pigskin. But before we get into that mode let’s take a moment to look backward. Before the season began I predicted the records of every team and the order of finish in each division. It’s time to see how I did and where I hit & missed. I think the easiest thing to do is to examine the league division by division. I will then assign myself a letter grade. Please don’t hesitate to comment, whether it be on my brilliance and pigskin savvy, or my complete and utter ineptitude.

 

NFC East

A couple of hits and one big miss. The Cowboys & Eagles both finished 11-5, and I had both at 10-6. Not bad. I did say that Dallas was overrated. Since they won the division I suppose I owe someone in the Lone Star State an apology. Washington finished dead last as I predicted, although I generously gave them a record of 7-9 while they actually finished 4-12 then fired their coach. Word is that Mike Shanahan is on his way to fix the mess, but as I said in my preview I believe the issue with the Redskins is incompetent ownership, and I am not sure anyone can do much about that. Where I was way off was with the New York Giants. I thought they’d go 13-3 and once again be a title contender. Instead they went 8-8. Oops.           

Final Grade = C+


NFC North

Nailed it. Predicted the order of finish…Minnesota, Green Bay, Chicago, Detroit…right on and was only slightly off on the records. The Vikings went 12-4 just as I said, Green Bay was one game better than my 10-6 prediction at 11-5, Chicago finished 7-9 which was only one game worse than I predicted at 8-8, and Detroit improved upon last season’s winless record with 2 wins…2 less than what I foresaw. I said I didn’t buy into the Jay Cutler hype in Chicago, and I was spot on.    Final Grade = A-


NFC South

Ehhh…not so good. I didn’t give this division enough credit and I gave them too much credit, if that makes any sense. I did have New Orleans finishing on top, but at 9-7. Instead they made a darn fine run at an undefeated season before finally closing out at 13-3. I had Carolina at 9-7 edging out Atlanta at 8-8 for second place. I was sort of close…just reverse the positions and the records. I said specifically about the Panthers “they have tough out-of-conference games against Miami, New England, and the Jets, plus they start the season against Philly, Dallas, and Atlanta. That may be 6 losses right there”…..and they did in fact lose all 6 games. I mused about the Falcons inability to sustain success and how they tended to follow up playoff seasons by going backward. In 2008 they went 11-5 and were a wildcard team…in 2009 they finished 9-7 and out of contention. I rest my case.  And I said Tampa would finish in last at 8-8, but they finished last at 3-13.

Final Grade = C


NFC West

Another division where I had the general idea but was a bit off on some of the details. Arizona finished atop the division at 10-6 just as I said. I’ll give myself a little pat on the back for that one. Once again I had 2nd & 3rd reversed, as San Francisco was the runner up, winning two more games than my 6-10 prediction. Meanwhile, Seattle slipped to third at 5-11, four games worse than I thought. St. Louis finished dead last not only in the division but in the whole NFL, winning only one game. I said they’d win five. My bad. I wonder how hard receiver TJ Houshmandzadeh is kicking himself for leaving Cincinnati and signing with Seatttle??      Final Grade = C+ (based largely on nailing the Cardinals record…otherwise the grade would be worse)

Overall NFC Grade = B-


AFC East

I am not happy with the actual results of this division in relation to my predictions, but I am satisfied with the general direction of my vibes. I realize that makes very little sense, but allow me to explain. Before the season everyone seemed to be saying two things: the Patriots will run away with it and the Bills will probably not do very well. But I said “not so fast my friends” (the only semi-meaningful contribution of Lee Corso to the universe). Turns out I was right. I said that things felt kind of off in New England and that they were “in for much more of a dogfight in their division than most folks seem to believe.” The Patriots did end up winning the division, but by only one game. They finished at 10-6, exactly as I predicted. Yay me. I said that the Dolphins would finish 11-5 and win the division, but that was way too optimistic. Instead they finished 3rd at 7-9. Bill Parcells won’t be happy with that. Maybe next year. I predicted the Jets to finish 2nd, and indeed they did…at 9-7, one game worse than I thought. And I gave Buffalo a record of 4-12, while they actually finished 6-10. This was a very muddled yet competitive and interesting division all season, just as I foresaw. I can’t give myself a great grade because the numbers just don’t back it up, but my general sense of things was almost spot on.        Final Grade = B-


AFC North

Here’s where it gets ugly. I said this about the Cincinnati Bengals back in September: “I’m not sure even the re-animated corpses of Vince Lombardi and Tom Landry combined could polish this turd.” I then said they’d finish 8-8 and 3rd in the division. To say I was wrong would be an understatement along the lines of “President Obama is somewhat lacking in his affection for capitalism”. The Bengals went 10-6 and won the division. Second place and 10-6 was what I had in mind for Baltimore, and they did exactly that only at 9-7. Cleveland didn’t disappoint me, as I had them finishing dead last at 6-10 and they were a game worse at 5-11. But my biggest blunder was with my Pittsburgh Steelers. I just couldn’t take the blinders off. I should have known that recent history indicates Super Bowl teams often struggle the following year. Actually I did know it…I just ignored the facts. I proudly proclaimed that the Steelers would win the division at 11-5 and said “I get the sense that Mike Tomlin won’t let his team become unfocused, so to be honest I’m not all that concerned. I am predicting another banner year for the black n’ gold.” How very wrong I was. I was only two games off on the actual record, as they went 9-7. But numbers can be deceiving. The Steelers did lose focus and suffered embarrassing losses to Cleveland, Kansas City, and Oakland…three of the worst teams in the league. Even given the surprising turnaround in Cincinnati, if the Steelers would have won just two of those three games they’d be division champs. I’d like to say I’ll learn from this experience and not let my man love for my team cloud my judgment in the future, but we’ll see.           Final Grade = D+


AFC South

I am beginning to sense a trend. I seem to be okay with choosing division winners and bottom dwellers, but have an issue with 2nd & 3rd place. I guess the old crystal ball needs a little fine tuning. The Indianapolis Colts were even more dominant than usual, and fared much better than I predicted even though I did have them in first place. I said they’d go 10-6 and they went 14-2. They too made a good run at an undefeated season, losing two games only because they pulled starters in fear that they might get hurt. I foresaw Jacksonville finishing last and they did, with the exact 7-9 record I predicted. I thought Houston would be good and just miss the playoffs at 9-7, and that’s exactly what they did. However, I mentioned that I didn’t think Matt Schaub was the answer at QB, and he proceeded to lead the league in passing yards, completions, yards per game, and passing attempts. I guess he’s better than I thought. My downfall was the Tennessee Titans. I thought they’d finish 2nd at 10-6. Instead they started the season 0-6 before rebounding to finish in 3rd place at 8-8. Vince Young is back at the helm behind center, and they did close out the campaign going 8-2, so maybe next year they’ll be competitive again.            Final Grade = B


AFC West

Damn near perfect. I nailed the order of finish…San Diego, Denver, Oakland, Kansas City. The Chargers went 13-3, one game worse than my prediction. I got Denver’s 8-8 record exactly right, which is remarkable considering they started off a very hot 6-0. I still can’t figure out what they accomplished by running Shanahan out of town. Oakland was predictably bad and I hit their 5-11 right on the money. Jamarcus Russell might be playing in Canada next year. Kansas City went 4-12, one game better than I thought. I grant you that this was probably the easiest division to figure out because everyone knew San Diego would be good and that both the Raiders and the Chiefs figured to be pretty awful. Still, I have to say I did rather well.

Final Grade = A

Overall AFC Grade = B-


So I give myself an overall grade of B-. I didn’t make any pre-season proclamations about the playoffs or the Super Bowl, but now that the field is set I have to say that the AFC looks like it comes down to Indianapolis and San Diego. Maybe this is finally the year for the Chargers. In the NFC I like Minnesota, New Orleans, Green Bay, and Arizona. I know that doesn’t narrow it down all that much, but there truly is parity there. A Chargers-Cardinals Super Bowl might not frost the cupcakes of east coasters, but that may very well be the matchup.

2009 NFL Preview – AFC

The word for this year’s NFL season is parity. Yes…..I realize that’s not an original thought. You hear it dozens of times from all the talking heads on ESPN, CBS, Fox, and NBC…..your friendly neighborhood purveyors of NFL action. But honest to God I really believe it to be the case this year. There are a few teams (Cleveland, Kansas City, Detroit) that continue to wallow in the land of dreadful despite all the usual machinations such as new coaches and noteworthy free agent signings or trades. And there are a few elite teams (Pittsburgh and the New York Giants for example) that continue to ride the tasty wave of success with no signs of decline. But the vast majority of the league seems to be atop a high wire, where a key injury or bad move by the coach will dictate the fickle difference between 7-9 and 11-5 but no amount of tinkering will make them neither elite nor awful. It’s one of the reasons we love the NFL…..it’s unpredictable and somewhat random. That being said, here’s my take on how we might see the season unfold. As always…please, no wagering. I don’t claim to actually be good at this.

We’ll take a look at the AFC first, and then I will post a look at the NFC in a few days:

AFC EAST

Miami Dolphins 11-5

Bill Parcells is large and in charge. And his head coach Tony Sparano seems like a true disciple. That’s a good thing. There’s a sense of stability in Miami that hasn’t been present for awhile, and in the NFL stability is usually a positive trait. The big question will be whether or not The Wildcat offense is something the rest of the league has figured out, or if the Dolphins can add enough new twists to keep it  fresh.

New York Jets                      10-6

The Jets are on the right path. I have a good feeling about rookie QB Mark Sanchez. Sure he’ll have some growing pains, but he can’t be any worse than what the departed Bret Favre was the second half of last season. New coach Rex Ryan is a defensive guru, so that side of the ball should see improvement.

New England Patriots       10-6

I can’t explain it, but I just sense the magic slipping away in Foxboro. I’m not convinced that Tom Brady is as healthy as desired, and a running attack featuring a three headed monster of Laurence Maroney, BenJarvis Green, and Fred Taylor just isn’t that overwhelming. I’m not saying New England will be a bad team, but I think they are in for much more of a dogfight in their division than most folks seem to believe.

Buffalo Bills                          4-12

No, I do not think that Terrell Owens is the savior this team needs. Though he’s been quiet thus far it is likely only a matter of time before he becomes the divisive force he’s been everywhere he’s played. Unfortunately for the Bills they are not in a position of strength where they can withstand such distractions. Dallas and Philadelphia thrived despite T.O.’s antics. Buffalo will not. Plus, this division is just too tough. The Bills may be looking at 6 losses just within their own division, and then they have games against Tennessee, Atlanta, and Indianapolis. Dick Jauron is a decent coach with the misfortune of being hired by subpar teams. Time to update the resume again Dick.


AFC SOUTH

Indianapolis Colts               10-6

The Colts, much like the Patriots, have been the cream of the crop for a long time. Did you realize that Peyton Manning is 33 years old and a veteran of 11 years?? Chinks in the armor have slowly developed over the past couple of years, but they have merely downgraded Indy from elite status to extremely good. And some of these emerging concerns aren’t so much a function of this team getting worse, but a recognition of other teams’ improvement. This division used to be Indy’s for the taking, but it has gotten quite competitive. The Colts have a new coach and Marvin Harrison isn’t around for Manning to throw to anymore. However, at the end of the day I still feel like no one is up to the task of dethroning the kings just yet…..until they get to the playoffs of course.

Tennessee Titans                10-6

Speaking of dethroning, Tennessee did do exactly that last year to the Colts. But I don’t believe they can pull off another 13-3 season. The defense is always above average, but the loss of DT Albert Haynesworth in free agency will have an impact. On offense the question is whether Kerry Collins, who up until last season had the aura of career backup, can continue his magic carpet ride. And what about Vince Young?? He all the sudden became a headcase in 2008 which is what allowed Collins to emerge as a star. The running attack is solid with the fleet of foot Chris Johnson and the bruising (and apparently sober) Lendale White. Whomever ends up being the QB has a few folks to throw to now thanks to the additions of free agent WR Nate Washington and first round choice Kenny Britt.

Houston Texans                  9-7

I keep waiting on the Texans to break through, but they continue to be just so-so with occasional flashes of potential. I’m not sure Matt Schaub is the answer at QB, and another receiver is needed so defenses can’t just key on Andre Johnson. Steve Slaton proved all the talking heads who said he wasn’t feature back material wrong, but I do believe the running game would benefit from adding a big battering ram for goal line and short yardage situations. Defensively this team just seems to be missing a piece or two. Being in the same division as Indianapolis and Tennessee doesn’t help matters, but that’s out of anyone’s control. The best game plan in Houston might be to sit tight and continue to improve one player at a time until that inevitable day when Peyton Manning retires.

Jacksonville Jaguars           7-9

I think the Jags will be slightly better than last season, but not much. The team took significant steps to improve the offensive line, and I’m of the opinion that that is the vital foundation of any good football team. RB Fred Taylor absconded to New England in a desperate attempt to win a ring, so Maurice Jones-Drew (some people call him The Space Cowboy, some call him The Gangster of Love) is the man now, and that’s probably a good thing. Veteran wideout Torry Holt will bolster the receiving corps along with a seemingly rejuvenated Troy Williamson who is determined to shed the “bust” label with which he has been saddled. There are two threads on which Jacksonville’s season hangs. The first is the defense. They are usually among the league’s best, but dropped off noticeably in 2008. The other is QB David Garrard. Once upon a time Garrard had a Randall Cunningham vibe. Last year it was more like Richie Cunningham. Nothing has happened this offseason to make me believe a momentous turnaround is on the horizon.


AFC NORTH

Pittsburgh Steelers                        11-5

Full disclosure…..I am a lifelong diehard Steeler fanatic. Admittedly it is hard for me to be completely objective when talking about my team. But I’m going to give it the old college try and leave it up to the reader’s discretion as to whether I’m on point or completely delusional. The Steelers are the defending Super Bowl Champions…..but let’s look deeper. They won last year despite having what was almost unanimously regarded as the league’s toughest schedule. They won despite both star RB Willie Parker and first round draft choice Rashard Mendenhall having major injuries and having to rely on third string RB Mewelde Moore. They won despite having an offensive line that no one was expecting to be very solid. So, extrapolating some logic from those statements, one could possibly surmise that with an easier schedule, both top runners healthy, and an offensive line that gelled better than anyone expected and now has an extra year of experience the Steelers might be even better in 2009. But not even I am willing to go that far. Defending Super Bowl champions haven’t had much luck the past decade or so, and this team did suffer some personnel losses. Will Limas Sweed validate being a high draft choice last year by stepping into the 3rd receiver role vacated by Nate Washington?? Will free agent signee Keiwan Ratliff be a suitable replacement for departed cornerback Bryant McFadden?? I’m not sure about the answers to those questions right now. Plus, the target is bigger than ever and one team in particular, the hated Ravens, will be gunning for the champs. But I get the sense that Mike Tomlin won’t let his team become unfocused, so to be honest I’m not all that concerned. I am predicting another banner year for the black n’ gold.

Baltimore Ravens                           10-6

The Ravens were oh-so-close last year. It’s rare when an 11-5 record doesn’t lock up a division title. QB Joe Flacco had a surprisingly proficient rookie season and the defense was as intimidating as everyone has come to expect. I don’t expect much of a drop off this year. It will be interesting to see how the departure of defensive coordinator Rex Ryan (the new head coach of the New York Jets) affects the chemistry. My guess is not much, atleast not in any measurable dynamic. I suppose a sophomore slump is possible for Flacco, but it is unlikely. Ray Lewis isn’t getting any younger, but he’s still got a couple great years in the tank. In almost any other division in the league Baltimore would be a runaway choice to come out on top. They just have the misfortune of playing in the same division with the only defense better than theirs.

Cincinnati Bengals                          8-8

A lot of folks derisively call them The Bungles, and it is a richly deserved bad reputation. They’ve had a lot of issues both on and off the field. Carson Palmer is theoretically healthy and fully recovered from past injuries which should help tremendously. Still, questions…and doubts…abound. I personally don’t believe that Laverneous Coles is an upgrade or even an even swap for departed receiver TJ Houshmandzadeh, and when your team is relying on underachieving Cedric Benson to carry the rushing load that’s a bad sign. The team drafted an OT with the 6th overall pick in the draft, but first he held out until late in the pre-season and then he broke his foot in practice, so there goes that idea. Long removed from the Super Bowl hay days of Boomer Esiason, Chris Collinsworth, and  Icky Woods, the modern day Bengals just seem snakebitten. I really like coach Marvin Lewis, who had much success as a defensive coach in Pittsburgh, Washington, and most notably Baltimore.  But I’m not sure even the re-animated corpses of Vince Lombardi and Tom Landry combined could polish this turd. It’s a testament to the talent of Palmer (and having Oakland, Kansas City, Detroit, and Cleveland – twice, on the schedule) that I’m even predicting a .500 finish.

Cleveland Browns                          6-10

I’m a Steelers fan so I hate the Browns, but I missed them when they were gone from the league for a few years. I was glad when they were reborn. But holy cow have they been dreadful since that triumphant return. They just can’t seem to find even a glimmer of hope, a small buoy in a raging sea of mediocrity. Atleast the Bengals have Palmer. The Browns pinned all their hopes a couple years ago on Notre Dame alumnus Brady Quinn. I never thought Quinn was that good even in college, and he hasn’t been good enough to seize the reins for the Browns. If you aren’t good enough to be the clear cut starting QB for such a bad team then you aren’t good enough period. New head coach Eric Mangini is a Bill Belichick disciple, which has been proven to mean diddly squat. Former Browns coach Romeo Crennel was a Belichick guy too, and that didn’t work well at all. Mangini himself was run out of New York, although I think maybe the Jets pulled the trigger a bit prematurely. Maybe some guys are meant to be really well respected coordinators and aren’t necessarily head coach material. Being in the same division with the Steelers and Ravens is just brutal.


AFC WEST

San Diego Chargers           14-2

Predicting the best record in the NFL for San Diego is as much about the atrocious division they play in than anything else. There are probably even a handful of college teams that could beat the three other teams in this division this season. San Diego has been a rather good team the past few seasons, and I don’t expect that to change. Yes, Ladainian Tomlinson has lost a step. But that’s like saying it’d take Mike Tyson 5 rounds to knock out Michael Spinks rather than the 1 round it took him 20 years ago. So what?? Shawne Merriman should be fully healthy now, so the defense will be better than it was in 2008. Philip Rivers just signed a fat contract, which might make him lazier but instead I believe it’ll make him relaxed and more effective. Vincent Jackson needs to step up and be the go to receiver many have thought him capable of being, and big time TE Antonio Gates needs to stay healthy. I truly believe that last year’s 8-8 season was a mirage, a one time off year that can be attributed to injuries to a few key players. That is unlikely to happen two straight seasons.

Denver Broncos                  8-8

The Josh McDaniels era hasn’t exactly gotten off to a rousing start…..and they haven’t even played a game yet. McDaniels is another of the aformentioned branches on the Belichick coaching tree, one that hasn’t proven very fruitful thus far. I don’t think this guy is going to change that fact. The whole Jay Cutler debacle was an inauspicious launch for the new regime, and even though Cutler undoubtedly acted like a petulant child the blame must be shared by coach McDaniels. I understand wanting “your guy” as a new coach. I get it. But it wasn’t as if Cutler was a bad quarterback. It’s not even like the Broncos were a bad team. They were 8-5 last year and then lost the final 3 games. If they would have won the last game they would have been in the playoffs. The biggest issue was the defense, which ranked near the bottom in most categories. The coach obviously miscalculated what bringing in QB Matt Cassel, whom he had worked with in New England, would do to Cutler’s psyche. Cassel didn’t even end up with the Broncos, but that didn’t matter. The damage was done and Cutler whined his way out of Denver and into a pretty decent gig with Chicago. The Broncos?? Well…they ended up with Kyle Orton. It’s akin to having Russell Crowe lined up to star in your new movie but he drops out and you end up with Keanu Reeves. This will not end well. They did draft what most considered the top RB in the draft in Georgia’s Knowshon Moreno, and he’ll be backed up by Correll Buckhalter and Lamont Jordan. Not a flashy running attack but it should be effective. I atleast like this trifecta more than New England’s. Some pieces were added on defense thru the draft and free agency, but I don’t see any real difference makers. In 2008 the Broncos finished with a .500 record, and I’m generously predicting the same record in 2009, which begs the question…why exactly did they fire Mike Shanahan??

Oakland Raiders                 5-11

Al Davis is still alive and kicking, and that is bad news for the once mighty Raiders. Seriously, what has happened to this team?? It is one of the premiere franchises in the NFL…..infamous, successful, bold. But the aging and apparently crazy Davis has turned them into a laughing stock. The man is 80 years old. Someone needs to make him retire. I’m just not impressed by anything the Raiders have to offer. They have a new coach. Whatever. They have Jamarcus Russell as the QB of the future and brought in Jeff Garcia to be a mentor and capable backup. Sorry…..still doesn’t stir anything within my soul. Even Darren McFadden is an overhyped RB who’ll get you 2 yards but just look flashier doing it than most other backs. They didn’t draft anyone inspiring either. It’s just more of the same from a team that seems to have no direction.

Kansas City Chiefs              3-13

Speaking of no direction, that brings us to the Chiefs. All you need to know about this team is that their new head coach is apparently going to attempt to be the quarterbacks coach and offensive coordinator too. The man is clearly a control freak and in over his head. The jury is still out on Matt Cassel, the newly acquired starting QB. Cassel wasn’t even a starter in college at USC, where he backed up both Carson Palmer and Matt Leinart. Last season he got his opportunity with the Patriots after Tom Brady went down with a knee injury. I get the fact that almost anyone is an upgrade over Brodie Croyle and Tyler Thigpen, but the fact is that we are talking about a guy who shined for only one season and that happened to be with one of the best supporting casts in football. The road to hell is paved with the short lived careers of football players who were really good for a year or two. Running back Larry Johnson has seen his production dramatically curtailed the past two seasons, and he is on the threshold of 30, the age when rushers traditionally begin a steep decline. Perennial all-pro tight end Tony Gonzalez got tired of losing and demanded a trade, so he’s now in Atlanta with the Falcons. There just isn’t much good news for the Chiefs. If Cassel proves himself more than just a one year wonder, and if Johnson has a career renaissance or possibly Jamaal Charles steps into that spot and breaks out, then maybe this team can do better than last season. But my gut instinct is that improvement will not manifest itself until next season.

45 Things To Do Before The Age Of 45

Night Panorama of the Las Vegas Strip, featuri...

A friend on the verge of 40 recently sent me a list of things he wants to accomplish before he turns 45. It inspired me. So I have made my own list. The list isn’t as adventurous as his, but I believe it is challenging without being unrealistic. And I guess I’m giving myself a little more time to accomplish everything since I have 10 years to his 5.

 

Things to Do Before I’m 45

 

1. Get married

2. Buy a house

3. Spread my seed

4. Become more well versed in The Bible

5. Complete & submit for sale my movie screenplay

6. Lose about 50-75 lbs.

7. Continue my education (masters degree? law school? film school?)

8. Get a dog

9. Rebuild my nest egg

10. Go to Vegas

11. Fly in an airplane

12. Attend the Super Bowl

13. Read the entire Shakespeare canon

14. Take a ride in a hot air balloon

15. See the ocean

16. Learn about astronomy

17. Write a novel

18. Take a cruise

19. Get a job that I enjoy and can stay at for the biggest part of the next 30 years

20. Study photography

21. Visit NY City

22. Learn about and begin the practice of fasting

23. Eliminate credit card debt

24. Atleast pass thru all 50 states (9 down, 41 to go)

25. Buy a suit specially tailored for me

26. Go to the real 221B Baker St. in London

27. Ride a train

28. Eat caviar

29. Be in Boston down by the Charles River watching the Boston Pops on July 4th

30. Try out for Jeopardy!

31. Spend New Year’s Eve in Times Square

32. Attend the Indianapolis 500

33. Become a decent chess player

34. Visit Italy

35. Become a sufficient, competent, maybe even semi-talented culinary craftsman

36. Volunteer at a literacy organization

37. Attend The Kentucky Derby

38. Learn about home brewing beer

39. Go to Mardi Gras

40. Attend an NCAA basketball Final Four

41. Learn sign language

42. Go to The Jimmy Stewart Museum in Indiana, PA

43. Attend a major college bowl game (Rose, Sugar, Orange, Fiesta, Cotton)

44. Work for a political campaign

45. See the Grand Canyon

*This list was originally written about a year and a half ago. Since that time I have accomplished two of these items. I bought a dog and I am a literacy volunteer. In a couple months I am tentatively planning on going to Vegas, and that trip has the potential to knock off up to 4 additional things. Some of the tasks listed are an ongoing process that I’m doing my best with.

America’s Pastime??

Barry Bonds in action.

Barry Bonds

I had every intention of doing a full blown 2009 baseball preview. That obviously didn’t happen. Opening Day has come and gone and so it seems a rather pointless exercise.

I remember not that long ago when Opening Day was an event. Everyone, even the most fair weather baseball fans, knew when it was approaching. I suppose it’s still a big deal for a significant amount of baseball aficionados, but it certainly doesn’t seem to have the cachet that it once did. I didn’t even realize it was occurring until I heard it mentioned on the radio in my car about an hour before the first pitch was to be tossed. There didn’t seem to be much coverage of spring training this year, or maybe I just wasn’t paying attention.

There are probably a lot of reasons for the decline in popularity of baseball, atleast in relative terms when compared with our ever-increasing love affair with football. For me personally I’m a Pittsburgh Pirates fan, and they haven’t been anywhere close to competitive for about 17 years. We Pirates fans have no real reason for hope or anticipation and usually quit paying close attention before summer even officially begins. I’m sure this apathy spreads to fans of other teams like the Kansas City Royals, Washington Nationals, and Cleveland Indians, whose teams are rarely that good. This can be traced to the lack of a salary cap, something football has and baseball sorely needs. There are also the constant scandals that have rocked the sport for the last couple of decades. I don’t believe it’s out of bounds to hypothesize that the beginning of the end for baseball started with the downfall of Pete Rose about 20 years ago. Then in 1994 there was a players’ strike that cut the season in half and forced the cancellation of the playoffs and World Series. Baseball has never fully recovered from that season and the wrath it instilled in loyal fans. It came very very close to a much desired reconciliation with its public in 1998 due to the excitement involving Mark McGwire and Sammy Sosa’s chase of Roger Maris’ vaunted home run record. But during the past 4 or 5 years even that progress has been unraveled as we’ve learned that all those home runs were likely a mirage, the numbers skewed by illegal substance abuse. One by one mighty heroes of the diamond have fallen from grace, from Barry Bonds to Jose Canseco to McGwire to Alex Rodriguez. Even pitchers, chief among them the legendary Roger Clemens, apparently aren’t above cheating.

We also cannot ignore the changing landscape of our nation. We prefer fast and frenetic these days, as opposed to slow and easy. Football appeals to our more modern, chaotic sensibilities, while baseball seems nostalgic and bucolic. Baseball is a relic, a living monument to a bygone era we recall with a certain sense of wistful wonder. It’s a nice place to visit occasionally, but it’s not something we can really sink our teeth into for the long haul. And with its 162 game season plus playoffs and then a World Series baseball definitely encompasses a long haul. Transversely, football season seems much shorter, even though it really isn’t. Close examination reveals that baseball opens in April and concludes in October…..7 months. Football, if one takes into consideration both college and the NFL season which basically overlap, begins in late August and climaxes in early February…..7 months. Of course there is a significant difference when one factors in that each team in football plays once per week, while in baseball your favorite team likely plays 4 or 5 times. Youngsters today consider baseball slow and boring. They have so many other choices…..video games, the internet, DVDs, Ipods. Our culture is on sensory overload, and baseball easily gets lost in the shuffle.

Football has better PR as well. Does anyone think football players don’t use performance enhancing drugs? If you do, you’re more than naïve. But no one seems to make nearly as big a deal out of it. Also, when was the last time you watched or attended a college baseball game? College baseball has an extremely limited following, while college football is HUGE. We are able to follow our beloved football players every step of the way from their recruitment to the university of their choice, through their entire college career, to speculating who’ll choose them in the NFL Draft (does anyone actually watch the MLB Draft? Ummm…no), through their (hopefully) long NFL career. We’re invested in football every step of the way. Baseball…..not so much.

This examination is not meant as an insult to baseball. I’m still a fan. I just find it unfortunate that circumstances have converged in such a way that prevents me, and legions of others, from being a passionate fan. Calling baseball America’s Pastime is nothing more than a marketing tool. It is more a reflection of America’s past.