2018 NFL Preview & Prognostications

The old saying is that “hindsight is 20/20”, and sometimes hindsight can also be absolutely hilarious. There is a Facebook page called Freezing Cold Takes which posts old tweets & comments from talking heads about players, teams, games, & draft picks that turned out to be way wrong, which is great because I’ve always thought it terrible that no one holds those people accountable for some of the outrageous opinions that they spew in an effort to get attention and stir the pot. Here at The Manofesto I do reflect on stuff I’ve written in the past and often call myself out on things about which I’ve been off base, and in looking back at last year’s preview I just have to roll my eyes that I said “football is a uniter, not a divider”, since the NFL proceeded to spend the next few months dividing the nation with their idiotic anthem protests. I’d like to think that this season will be different, but between renewed debate about those protests in addition to new rules that turn what used to commonly be referred to as a tackle into a penalty, I’m not sure football fans will be any happier with the NFL in 2018. Atleast they loosened up and clarified exactly what a catch is, so I suppose that’s progress. And as far as hindsight goes, a year ago I did throw out a plea for someone to “give Jon Gruden a coaching job and get him off our TVs”, so a shout out to the Raiders for answering that prayer.  As always the team’s record from the previous year is in parentheses, with the predicted record for this season following it. Enjoy.

 

 

 

 

North

Minnesota Vikings       (13-3)         11-5

Chicago Bears             (5-11)        8-8

Green Bay Packers     (7-9)           8-8

Detroit Lions                 (9-7)           6-10

 

The Vikings swapped out Case Keenum for Kirk Cousins at QB, which theoretically should be an upgrade. The defense was already stellar, and they’ve now added defensive tackle Sheldon Richardson and drafted cornerback Mike Hughes in the first round, so I see no reason to expect a dropoff. Minnesota won’t take anyone by surprise this year, but I still think they’ll win the division easily. The biggest surprise might be the Bears. I really like quarterback Mitch Trubisky, Jordan Howard & Tarik Cohen make for a great running back tandem, & I think wide receiver Kevin White (formerly of my WVU Mountaineers) will finally stay healthy and prove why he was a first round pick in 2015. My concern is with Chicago’s defense, and with this being new head coach Matt Nagy’s first season I think the playoffs are a bit much to expect. I feel like the Packers are leaning on their reputation but in reality aren’t that good. QB Aaron Rodgers has spent most of the offseason gallivanting around with new girlfriend Danica Patrick, and it wouldn’t be the first time that an athlete’s personal life has distracted them from their job. The Lions have a new coach too…former Patriots defensive coordinator Matt Patricia, who was indicted for sexual assault back in his college days but not convicted, something he didn’t feel was important to mention to the powers-that-be in Detroit during the hiring process. I think Patricia will get the Lions over the hump someday…but not this year. The roster simply isn’t good enough and the division is too tough.

 

 

 

South

Carolina Panthers                 (11-5)         12-4

Atlanta Falcons                     (10-6)         7-9

New Orleans Saints              (11-5)         6-10

Tampa Bay Buccaneers      (5-11)         2-14

 

The NFC South has been one of the most compelling & competitive divisions in the league the past few years, but I don’t believe that’ll be the case in 2018. Cam Newton is in his eighth season under center for the Panthers, and it feels like the time for hype is over and he actually needs to lead his team back to the Super Bowl, a height they reached in 2015 before getting throttled by the Denver Broncos. I’m just not feeling good vibes about the Falcons or Saints, although I’d love to see 39 year old Drew Brees end his career on a high note in the next couple of seasons. I foresee sharp declines for Atlanta and New Orleans this year. I’ve never been a huge fan of Bucs QB Jameis Winston…not because he lacks talent since he is actually quite capable, but because he seems like kind of a jackass. Once again he is being accused of improper conduct, this time for allegedly groping an Uber driver a couple of years ago. The NFL found enough merit in the charge that they suspended Winston for the first few games of the season, and I don’t think things will get much better for the team once he returns.

 

 

 

East

Philadelphia Eagles              (13-3)         12-4

Washington Redskins                    (7-9)           9-7

Dallas Cowboys                              (9-7)           7-9

New York Giants                   (3-13)         6-10

 

A year ago I predicted that the Eagles would finish 5-11 and have the third overall pick in the NFL Draft. Instead they won 13 games & the division and went on to upset the Pats in the Super Bowl. Now starting QB Carson Wentz is returning from a torn ACL suffered late last season, and Super Bowl MVP Nick Foles is the backup, which seems unfair to the rest of the league. The Redskins lost Kirk Cousins but replaced him under center with Alex Smith, which feels like a lateral move. The Cowboys have Dak Prescott back as their quarterback, but I’m not sure he has anyone to thrown the ball to after the departure of Dez Bryant and the retirement of tight end Jason Witten. Sure they have RB Zeke Elliot, but what if defenses stack eight in the box and dare Prescott to beat them?? That won’t end well for Dallas. As much as some may disagree, I don’t believe the Giants are going to get back into the playoff hunt as long as Eli Manning is their quarterback. Eli has benefited from his family ties and a couple of really lucky Super Bowl wins, but in general I’ve always felt that he is overrated and now he is on the downside of his career. The Giants drafted running back Saquon Barkley second overall, and he will undoubtedly open up the offense allowing receiver Odell Beckham to catch his fair share of touchdowns, but I just don’t think it’ll be enough, especially if the defense doesn’t gel.

 

 

 

West

Los Angeles Rams               (11-5)         10-6

San Francisco 49ers            (6-10)         10-6

Seattle Seahawks                 (9-7)           5-11

Arizona Cardinals                  (8-8)           3-13

 

Seattle’s Legion of Boom has been relegated to the dust bin of history and their once imposing defense looks totally decimated. But hey, atleast they still have Russell Wilson at quarterback, right?? That’s the only reason I’m picking the Seahawks to win more games than the Cardinals, because Arizona is going into the season with fragile Sam Bradford as their signal caller…unless first rounder Josh Rosen steals the job in the pre-season. The 49ers seemed like a completely different team after they traded for QB Jimmy Garoppolo in the latter stages of last season, and I think he’s the real deal. I’m not all that confident in the weapons Jimmy G. has surrounding him, but if the defense is as good as it looks to be on paper then ‘Frisco could pull out their fair share of tight, low scoring games. Conversely, the Rams should put plenty of points on the board as young QB Jared Goff gets in sync with receivers Cooper Kupp, Robert Woods, Pharoah Cooper, & Brandin Cooks. Oh, and they have top flight running back Todd Gurley toting the rock. So if the defense is even slightly above average I think the Rams have to be the favorites by a nose over San Francisco.

 

 

Playoff Teams:   Minnesota, Carolina, Philadelphia, L.A. Rams, Washington, San Francisco

NFC Championship:   Minnesota Vikings vs. Philadelphia Eagles

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

North

Pittsburgh Steelers               (13-3)         11-5

Baltimore Ravens                 (9-7)           8-8

Cleveland Browns                 (0-16)         6-10

Cincinnati Bengals                (7-9)           5-11

 

It is a testament to how little regard I (and most of the football viewing public) give the Browns that I didn’t even realize that they went 0-16 last season. I thought they’d won atleast one game, but that was in 2016. I’m not all that enamored with #1 overall pick Baker Mayfield not because he doesn’t have potential but because I think Cleveland could’ve made some deals, improved their team, and still snagged Mayfield later in the first round. Actually he kind of gives me a Brett Favre vibe, and if that’s true then he could turn out to be the answer they’ve been searching for in The Factory of Sadness for many years. But for now winning more games than they’ve won in total over the past couple of seasons would be cause for optimism. If that actually happens then it could mean a last place finish for the Bengals, which I’d have to assume would bring an end to Marvin Lewis’ decade & a half long reign as Cincy’s head coach. I’m not at all impressed with quarterback Andy Dalton or any of his weapons, with the exception of receiver AJ Green, who has to be pondering an escape to a contender after eight seasons with a team going nowhere. Their defense might keep Cincinnati competitive in quite a few games, but I think they’ll fall short more often than not. There is a quarterback controversy brewing in Baltimore, with fans & sports media desperately wanting rookie Lamar Jackson (a former Heisman Trophy winner) to prove himself good enough to supplant veteran Joe Flacco. The problem is that neither quarterback has anyone noteworthy to throw to, and the running game is a triple threat of mediocrity. The defense is always stout in Baltimore though, which might be good enough to snag a wild card. The division is my Steelers’ to lose. A year ago I pointed out that “the AFC North isn’t their true competition” and that “the only thing on anyone’s mind is overcoming the Patriots and getting to the Super Bowl”. That is truer than ever after losing home field advantage to the Patriots on one of those stupid “was it a catch or wasn’t it” decisions and then not really showing up against the Jags in the playoffs. Much of the offseason in Pittsburgh has been spent dealing with RB Le’veon Bell’s contract demands, and it’s all but a foregone conclusion that this will be his final season wearing Black & Gold. That combined with Ben Roethlisberger’s advanced age makes 2018 feel like a make or break, all or nothing, all chips in the center of the table season for the Steelers.

 

 

 

South

Houston Texans                  (4-12)         10-6

Jacksonville Jaguars           (10-6)         9-7

Tennessee Titans                 (9-7)           8-8

Indianapolis Colts                 (4-12)         7-9

 

I really like QB Deshaun Watson. He may have been on his way to being named NFL Rookie of the Year until a knee injury took him out midway thru the season. Assuming that he is healthy & ready to go I have to believe that the Texans are the team to beat in the South. Philanthropic defensive tackle JJ Watt also had his 2017 season torpedoed by injury, but he’ll be back on the field as well leading a stout defense. There is a lot to like about Houston. I suppose most “experts” will be picking Jacksonville to win the division again and maybe even make it to the Super Bowl…but I’m not convinced. Obviously their defense is quite impressive, but I am stunned that they stuck with Blake Bortles under center, and the rest of the offense is just as prosaic with the exception of RB Leonard Fournette, who is an injury waiting to happen. The Colts’ entire season rests on the health of QB Andrew Luck, and judging by the past two years that’s not at all comforting. If Luck is back then the question is can he live up to the Peyton Manning comparisons that were prevalent when he first entered the league, and I just don’t see that happening this season. I’ve got to see more from receiver TY Hilton, tight end Jack Doyle, & running back Marlon Mack…not to mention the offensive line, and I’m really not sure what to expect from the defense. First year head coach Frank Reich really has his work cut out for him in Indy. I feel like the Titans will be about the same as last year, perhaps a bit improved defensively. I like QB Marcus Mariota, and Corey Davis should emerge as a legit top flight receiver, but with Houston rebounding from a season that I believe was an anomaly it feels like Tennessee will be on the outside looking in.

 

 

 

East

New England Patriots           (13-3)         11-5

New York Jets                       (5-11)         7-9

Buffalo Bills                            (9-7)           6-10

Miami Dolphins                      (6-10)         5-11

 

Ugh. I hate this part. The Patriots are like a damn cockroach that no one can seem to destroy. Credit where credit is due though…they have been resilient in fending off the competition for over a decade. Whether you attribute that to skill, luck, cheating, or something else is a matter of opinion. At any rate, I won’t predict their demise until I actually see proof of impending doom, and though I’ve been looking & hoping for that for a few years now it hasn’t happened yet. Everybody else in the division is just there to provide the façade of competition. The Jets have yet another new quarterback, although it is possible that veteran journeyman Josh McCown will start ahead of rookie Sam Darnold for a few weeks. Buffalo had a decent season a year ago, but I think they’ll fall back a bit in 2018. AJ McCarron is penciled in to start ahead of first round draft pick Josh Allen under center, and I suppose it is possible that either could emerge as a pleasant surprise. On paper the Bills defense seems like it should be good, so we’ll see. Ryan Tannehill returns from injury to quarterback the Dolphins, while Jay Cutler has re-retired and is doing reality TV. God help us all. There are some decent weapons available to Tannehill, but the fact that Cutler only got Miami six wins a year ago and Tannehill isn’t as good as Cutler doesn’t bode well. The defense has potential, but I don’t think that’ll be enough to win very many games.

 

 

 

West

Los Angeles Chargers            (9-7)           9-7

Oakland Raiders                    (6-10)         8-8

Kansas City Chiefs               (10-6)         7-9

Denver Broncos                     (5-11)         2-14

 

Thanks again to the Raiders for bringing Gruden back to coach, which means that ESPN’s Monday Night Football crew will consist of Joe Tessitore, retired players Booger McFarland & Jason Witten, and Lisa Salters reporting from the field. Sounds good to me. I don’t believe that the Raiders will be back in the playoffs just yet, but they’ll improve slightly and Derek Carr might get back to being the talented quarterback he was a couple of years ago. Amari Cooper and Packers’ refugee Jordy Nelson make for an impressive receiving tandem, and Marshawn Lynch & former Buccaneer Doug Martin should solidify the ground game. The defense seems like it has some questions, which is why I’m hesitant to make Oakland more than a .500 team. I really sense a decline coming from Kansas City. Second year quarterback Patrick Mahomes takes over for the departed Alex Smith, and it might take some time for the young man to figure things out. He’s got some fantastic weapons at his disposal, so perhaps the learning curve won’t be as steep as I’m predicting. The Broncos feel like they’re on the edge of the cliff. Case Keenum is the new quarterback, and we’ll find out fairly fast if he’s the talented guy that won 11 out of 14 games with the Vikings last season or the pedestrian backup everyone always believed him to be. If Denver’s defense gets back to being as great as they were when winning the Super Bowl a few years ago that’ll help a lot, but I feel like they were pretty good last season and the team only won five games. I can’t quite put my finger on it, but something is amiss in the Mile High City, and it might get worse before it gets better.

 

 

Playoff Teams:   Pittsburgh, Houston, New England, L.A. Chargers, Jacksonville, Baltimore

AFC Championship:    Pittsburgh Steelers vs. Houston Texans

 

 

 

 

 

 

17

 

 

 

 

13

 

 

 

 

 

Top 5 Picks in 2019 Draft:

1       Tampa Bay Buccaneers

2       Denver Broncos

3       Arizona Cardinals

4       Seattle Seahawks

5       Cincinnati Bengals

Winning & Musing…Volume 3.18

October is often thought of as the best time of the annual sports calendar because the NFL, NBA, World Series, hockey, & college football are all available to us. However, late spring & early summer…with the NBA & NHL playoffs, a little golf, the Indy 500 & Coca-Cola 600 both on Memorial Day weekend, & baseball all happening…ain’t too shabby. Let’s discuss.

 

 

 

 

At the beginning of the NBA playoffs my only wish was that two of three teams not advance to The Finals. Things got off to a good start when the aging San Antonio Spurs were eliminated in the first round. Heading into the Memorial Day Weekend it seemed plausible that my hopes would be fulfilled and we’d get a fresh & interesting championship matchup. Sadly that dream died in two Game 7s, and now…for the fourth year in a row…we’re stuck with Golden State vs. Cleveland. I realize that many basketball fans are excited about this, but I am not your average NBA fan. For a variety of reasons I will not be watching one single second of the series. Maybe next season Philly, Boston, New Orleans, Houston, & Minnesota will figure some things out and break up the monotony.

 

 

I am surprisingly ambivalent about the NFL’s new anthem policy. I once called kneeling during the national anthem a “meaningless exhibition of symbolic rage” and stand by that opinion, but I also opined that it is within players’ Constitutional rights to do so. It isn’t something I would do, the original intent of the protest is foolish, & its stated purpose had been hijacked into a political game of chicken…but as disrespectful as I believe kneeling is I’m not sure the NFL has handled the situation all that well. They did nothing at the height of the controversy last season, and it felt like the whole circus had sort of diminished much like a hurricane eventually loses steam…until the NFL stirred things up again for no reason. Young parents are often taught the Ferber Method in which a crying infant is to be left alone and eventually they’ll quiet down. In the same way, I think if fans & the media would stop paying attention to anthem protests the players would get bored with it and move on…and even if they didn’t stop atleast they & their “cause” wouldn’t be receiving any validation. Unfortunately the NFL decided to poke the whiny, spoiled, & sanctimonious bear.

 

 

Y’all know that I’m a really lukewarm hockey fan, and whatever interest I did have in the NHL playoffs pretty much disappeared when the two time defending Stanley Cup champion Pittsburgh Penguins were eliminated. That being said, I am rooting for Vegas to bring home The Cup in its inaugural season. Former Penguins’ goaltender Marc-Andre Fleury now plays for the Golden Knights, and I also think it’d be fun to see an expansion team win because it would tick off hockey “purists”. There’s also my longstanding love of Las Vegas, a city I hope to visit someday. I’m not actually going to watch any of the games, but for what it’s worth…Go Vegas!!

 

 

How insane is it that we went 37 years between the last two Triple Crown winners, but now we could see another one just three years later?? Of course it must be noted that between Affirmed’s achievement in 1978 and the 2015 trifecta of American Pharoah there were 13 horses that won the Kentucky Derby & Preakness Stakes only to fall short in the Belmont Stakes, so it’d be premature to assume that Justify will wear the proverbial crown. Not only is Belmont the longest of the three races (the Derby is 1.25 miles, the Preakness is 1& 3/16 miles, & the Belmont is 1.5 miles), but there are always fresh horses entered that didn’t run in the previous two races. As a matter of fact, it is fairly common for only a few horses to run all three Triple Crown races, with several in the Belmont field having skipped either the Derby, the Preakness, or both. For this reason the “smart money” might lean toward one of those horses instead of Justify.

 

 

Perhaps I am missing something, but I don’t understand all the hype and/or consternation about The Supreme Court’s recent decision against the Professional and Amateur Sports Protection Act. That 1992 law “barred state-authorized sports gambling with some exceptions”, making Nevada the only state where it was legal to wager on games, but now all bets are off (pun intended) and it’s a free-for-all gambling frenzy. But wait!! Haven’t we had The Internet for the past quarter century?? I’m not a big gambler, but I have bet on the Triple Crown horse races online for several years, and could have bet on just about anything else if I’d chosen to do so…so what’s the big deal?? Are casinos suddenly going to pop up everywhere now?? I suppose that’s possible. Will all of those little “gambling cafes” that litter the landscape of my small hometown now offer sports betting in addition to slot machines?? That would actually make such establishments somewhat more interesting. I’m not completely obtuse here folks…I get it. But let’s not pretend that this new legality suddenly allows people to engage in some sort of forbidden activity that they’ve been dying to try but have been prohibited from doing. The truth is that gambling has been a huge business for decades, and not just in Vegas or Atlantic City. The Supreme Court has just brought it out of the shadows…probably so the government can get a piece of the action.

Winning & Musing…Bye Bye Football!!

Well. It’s been over a week since the football season ended, so I suppose we should do our traditional wrap-up. For some reason this year doesn’t seem as…bleak…as the calendar typically feels immediately after football season. I’m not especially into The Olympics, but I guess it does alleviate the emptiness just a little. It helps that the college basketball season has been compelling even before March Madness, and there has been plenty of offseason news in other sports as well. And I might even try to get back into Nascar this year, so that’ll be fun. Anyway, let’s briefly revisit football one final time before we let it rest for a few months.

 

 

 

 

I get a real kick out of looking back at my NFL Preview, which was even more off base than usual. I correctly predicted just six of the twelve playoff teams. I got 4 of 6 right in the AFC, which isn’t awful, but only 2 of 6 in the NFC, which is terrible. My AFC title game was Steelers vs. Patriots, which was half right, while my NFC title game was Giants vs. Packers, and neither team even made the playoffs. There were a bunch of other insightful gems as well:

  • “the Bills are just treading water, with new head coach Sean McDermott being the latest guy that’ll lead the team nowhere before getting canned in a couple of years” Buffalo went 9-7 & made the playoffs. McDermott’s job looks pretty secure, especially if they can upgrade the quarterback situation.
  • “I think this is a year in which the future Vegas franchise establishes dominance while Kansas City takes a step backward” The future Vegas franchise being the Raiders, who went 6-10. And the Chiefs, though they won two less games than the previous season, still won the division.
  • “The Chiefs feel like they’re in a transitional phase, with first round pick Patrick Mahomes biding his time until QB Alex Smith goes away” Well, I guess I wasn’t totally wrong about the Chiefs. They traded Smith after the season and Mahomes will be their starting QB in 2018.
  • “I’m sure everyone in Pittsburgh would deny it, but the truth is that the AFC North isn’t their true competition. The fact is that the only thing on anyone’s mind is overcoming the Patriots and getting to the Super Bowl.” Unfortunately the Steelrs couldn’t overcome the stupid NFL rulebook or the Jacksonville Jaguars.
  • “Tom Savage will probably begin the season as the starter, but I really like Deshaun Watson and think he’ll be one of the league’s best QBs in a couple of years” Watson did become the starter for the Houston Texans even quicker than I’d imagined and looks like he’ll be really good. Unfortunately he tore an ACL midway thru the season during practice.
  • Of the Jacksonville Jaguars I opined that “they’ve gone backward. Unlike most people I’m not that psyched about first round pick Leonard Fournette, and QB Blake Bortles inspires zero confidence.” I’m still not completely sold on Bortles, but he led his team to a division title and an appearance in the AFC Championship. And Fournette?? He rushed for over 1000 yards and had ten TDs.
  • My thoughts on the NFC East?? “This is a tough division, but New York has to be the heavy favorite.” The Giants finished dead last at 3-13 and have the second overall pick in the NFL Draft. The Cowboys & Redskins were mediocre. The Eagles ran away with the division and eventually won The Super Bowl.
  • Speaking of the Redskins, I said that “they feel like a team on the negative side of transformation until the likely departure of Cousins and the drafting of a new quarterback next year.” Well, Cousins will be leaving in free agency, and I suppose it’s still possible that Washington may draft a quarterback, but they really don’t need to since they traded for Alex Smith.
  • My thoughts about the Seattle Seahawks included the idea that “RB Eddie Lacy has moved to the northwest from Green Bay, and I expect him to be in shape & a significant contributor.” Lacy was the team’s fifth leading rusher and got lost in the shuffle when rookie Chris Carson emerged as the starter. Even after Carson suffered a season ending ankle injury free agent signee Mike Davis won the job, and Lacy’s football future is very much in doubt.
  • “The Vikings defense will be alright, but might have to be better than that” It was the best defense in the NFL.
  • “I’d like to see QB Drew Brees lead the Saints back to the playoffs as he winds down his brilliant career, but I don’t think it’s going to happen” The Saints did make the playoffs, but lost to Minnesota on one of the most improbable passing TDs you’ll ever see.
  • Of the Saints I opined that “it’ll probably be Mark Ingram & third round choice Alvin Kamara getting most of the work in the backfield by the mid-point of the season” Kamara did indeed emerge as a pretty good rookie RB, while Adrian Peterson was traded to the Arizona Cardinals just a month into the season.

 

 

I don’t care if their fans are obnoxious Neanderthals who literally eat horse manure. I don’t care if they burn down half the damn city of Philadelphia. I am just THRILLED that the Eagles beat the detestable New England Patriots in the Super Bowl. And…if I may quote my man Forrest Gump…that’s all I have to say about that.

 

 

Speaking of The Super Bowl…

The only commercial that made a dent in my memory is the one where Eli Manning & Odell Beckham did the dance from Dirty Dancing, and I don’t even recall what it was advertising. The halftime show was just fine. I like Justin Timberlake, and thought his Prince tribute in Minnesota was a nice touch. The best part of the post-game was alleged comedian & actor Kevin Hart getting denied access to the Lombardi Trophy and the victory stage by a huge bodyguard who looked like he belongs in a WWE ring. Fans of This Is Us were anxiously awaiting the end of the festivities so we could watch the show’s most highly anticipated episode, which did not disappoint. After that I ended my nearly six month divorce from Jimmy Fallon’s Tonight Show mainly because the cast of This Is Us were set to appear. That ended in disappointment when Fallon went political again during a sketch when he was doing his Bob Dylan impression, and then the This Is Us cast’s interview was less than  five minutes long and had to be “spoiler free” because the live audience hadn’t seen the show. It’ll be a very long time before Fallon gets another reprieve from me.

 

 

Going back to college football y’all might be interested to know that I finished our Bowl-a-Palooza with a record of 19-21, while Zach broke even at 20-20. I started off strong and it looked like I might run away with it, but I faded fast and Zach closed strong.

 

 

I thought the College Football Playoff committee screwed up by putting the Alabama Crimson Tide in the playoff at all. Sure, they ultimately won the national championship yet again, but not only didn’t they win their conference but they didn’t even make it to the SEC title game. If the committee isn’t going to have any respect for conference championships then perhaps we should eliminate those games and maybe even eradicate conferences altogether. I have such an idea percolating in my mind and may write about it this offseason if I get bored enough to really be missing football.

 

 

I’m not even going to analyze my pre-season Top 25. I don’t think any of my predictions were accurate. I know my final four was USC, Penn St., Oklahoma St., & Florida St. The Seminoles in particular had an abysmal year after losing their starting QB to injury. It was so bad that head coach Jimbo Fisher bolted for Texas A&M after the season.

 

 

Our Pigskin Picks of Profundity ended with me at 54-54, while Zach was 52-56. We went into the final week tied and I went 3-4 and Zach was a not-so-good 1-6. But Zach did improve his 2016 winning percentage, jumping from 37% to 48%. I’m already looking forward to next season.

 

 

The Pro Football Hall of Fame Class of 2018 includes receivers Randy Moss & Terrell Owens, linebackers Ray Lewis, Brian Urlacher, & Robert Brazile (a player from the late 70’s/early 80’s), safety Brian Dawkins, guard Jerry Kramer (possibly the last of Lombardi’s Packers to be enshrined), & executive Bobby Beathard. I’m a bit surprised that Moss & Owens got voted in the same class. They’ve been dangling the carrot in front of TO for a couple of years, so I thought maybe they’d finally vote him in but make Moss wait. As a West Virginian and an alumnus of Marshall University I’m very happy for Moss. Perhaps I don’t know what the hell I’m talking about, but I always perceived Dawkins as pretty good but never thought of him as a Hall-of Famer. I suppose Lewis & Urlacher were no-brainers, although I’ve never hidden my disdain for Lewis. RB Edgerrin James, DBs John Lynch, Everson Walls, & Ty Law, offensive linemen Tony Boselli, Kevin Mawae, Joe Jacoby, Steve Hutchinson, & Alan Faneca, and WR Isaac Bruce all fell short. Of those I am most surprised that Boselli didn’t make it. I’ll be rooting for him, Faneca, & Jacoby in 2019, but that’ll be the first year of eligibility for tight end Tony Gonzalez, safety Ed Reed, & cornerback Champ Bailey so the vote could be interesting.

The 2017 Sammy Awards – Part 2

Welcome back to the 2017 Sammy Awards. If you missed Part 1 of the show please take a few moments to go back & catch up. We’ll be right here waiting patiently for your return, and then we will continue taking a fun look back at the previous year.

 

 

 

After a few brief comments from our host Andy Cohen it’s time for our next award. Please give a warm welcome to a 70 year old man who still thinks an app is something one eats before the main meal. He’s a legendary comedian and star of films like The Princess Bride, When Harry Met Sally, & City Slickers, as well as the nine time host of The Academy Awards and a former host of The Sammys. The man is a national treasure, and we are happy to welcome back Billy Crystal!! And the nominees are:

 

 

 

App of the Year

 

Words with Friends

Basically it is Scrabble, and I’ve always loved Scrabble. I’m all about word games rather than shooting/war type games. I almost always have three or four games going, and though my record isn’t as good as I’d prefer I enjoy it tremendously.

 

Pinterest

I always thought Pinterest was something thru which women traded recipes, but I was wrong. There are tons of “pins” available on a plethora of subjects…almost anything you can imagine (books, food, history, religion, humor, & a bunch of others). I’m not sure about how much people actually get out of the whole thing since it’s pretty easy to scroll thru stuff, pin something to one of your “boards”, and then move on. That describes my process anyway…others may actually take time to go back and study what they’ve saved. Pinterest atleast has the potential to be useful, and it’s pretty user friendly, which are two great qualities in an app.

 

HQ Trivia

HQ is the new kid on the block, and it’s a bit different than other games one might play on a smartphone. HQ is a live game show that offers its players the opportunity to win real cash. The game is played twice daily…3pm & 9pm EST, and is usually hosted by the self-proclaimed Quizz Daddy, Semitic Sajak, Woke Woolery, & Regis Trill-bin…comedian Scott Rogowsky, who refers to the audience as HQ-ties and seems familiar to me for some reason. There are twelve questions of increasing difficulty, and the prize is generally $1000-1500, which sounds awesome until you realize that there are a couple hundred thousand people playing, which means that even if you win the payout might not even be enough to buy a popcorn & soda to snack on during a matinee. Plus, you only have a very rapid ten seconds to choose the correct multiple choice answer, and the questions are pretty tricky. I love trivia and feel like I’m reasonably intelligent, but I don’t think I’ve gotten past Q6 or 7. HQ & I are on a break right now because the game is rather wonky, with noticeable lag time and occasional crashes. I became dismayed when I answered a question correctly but was nevertheless disqualified, so the app was deleted from my phone in a fit of irritation, but I kind of miss it and will resume playing soon.

 

Word Cookies

In my world there’s not a much better combination than food & word games. The App Store describes Word Cookies as “a fun & exciting word puzzle game” in which the object is to “find hidden words” with the benefit that it will “improve vocabulary, concentration, & spelling skills.” It’s a modern spinoff of Boggle, and you aren’t playing against anyone but yourself. I can amuse myself for hours with Word Cookies, though what usually happens is that I play for a few minutes at a time at halftime of the game or during commercial breaks if I’m watching television.

 

 

 

And the Sammy goes to…..

 

 

 

Word Cookies. One of the reasons I’ve always enjoyed watching the game show Jeopardy! is that I feel like I might have learned a thing or two in that half hour. I’m not sure that Word Cookies improves vocabulary since most of the words you find are rather short & very basic, but I’m on board with the spelling & concentration benefits. It’d be unfair to call it mindless fun. However, it doesn’t feel like there’s unnecessary effort involved…I actually find playing it very soothing. Word Cookies is exactly the sort of time waster that’s not a complete waste of time that all phone apps should aspire to be.

 

 

Before we continue with the awards we have time for another exciting musical interlude. We are turnt to welcome to the stage a five time Grammy winner who has raised the roof during two Super Bowl halftime shows. Get up on your feet and show some love for Bruno Mars!!

 

 

 

That was da bomb diggity!!  Thank you Bruno!!

 

Presenting our next award is a highly regarded comedian and occasional actor who has been known to go off the grid for long periods of time. But now he’s back with two brand new comedy specials on Netflix, which we are contractually obligated to mention as recompense for his appearance on this show. Please give a warm welcome to the allegedly funny Dave Chappelle!! And the nominees are:

 

 

The DB Cooper Award (For the Person Who Most Needs to Disappear)

 

Jimmy Kimmel, Stephen Colbert, Jimmy Fallon, & Seth Meyers

It wasn’t that long ago when I adored late night television. There was nothing better than winding down after a long day with some funny jokes, amusing comedy bits, & vapid celebrity interviews. But things steadily began to change a few years ago. Letterman started going political, but I was willing to overlook it because he was a lifelong institution. And then he retired. After that the incomparable Craig Ferguson left the late night arena and was replaced with James Corden, who just doesn’t cut it. Letterman was replaced by Stephen Colbert, while Jimmy Fallon had been replaced at 12:30 with SNL alum Seth Meyers when Fallon took over The Tonight Show. Jimmy Kimmel has been hosting his show since 2003 and had been reasonably amusing. He was growing on me. And then Donald Trump was elected President of the United States. Colbert’s show was straight up political propaganda from Day 1, which is why I’ve rarely watched. It didn’t take Meyers long to become a liberal hack, on occasion campaigning in such a way that one knows that he isn’t even trying to be funny. It’s like watching CNN or MSNBC. In 2017 Kimmel went completely off the rails, using his show to expound on issues like health care & gun control, complete with crocodile tears. Look, I’m sorry that his baby was born with a heart defect and sincerely hope the boy will be okay, but I don’t watch late night comedy shows for political discourse. If I’m in that kind of mood I’ll tune into one of the 24 hour news channels. Fallon was the last holdout…until Monday August 14, 2017. Following the tragic events in Charlottesville, VA The Tonight Show did a cold open in which Fallon went all in on the divisive rhetoric that has infested our nation. I haven’t watched his show since, and I don’t foresee that changing in 2018. These men killed late night TV with their sociopolitical agenda, and Johnny Carson must be doing somersaults in his grave.

 

The Ball Family

I’m sure Lonzo Ball is a talented enough basketball player, otherwise the Los Angeles Lakers wouldn’t have selected him with the #2 overall pick in the NBA Draft. But is he transcendent?? Is he on the same level with Magic, Bird, & Jordan?? Is he as good as Kobe, Lebron, & Durant?? I don’t believe he is, and if he’s not then is he worth the hassle since the entire family is a cancer?? Younger brothers LiAngelo & LaMelo have already been banished to Lithuania. LiAngelo was arrested back in November when he was a freshman for UCLA after shoplifting in China. He’d still be rotting in jail there if President Trump hadn’t bailed him out. LaMelo is only 16 years old but has already dropped out of school to play pro ball in Lithuania, and last summer used the “N Word” during an appearance on WWE Raw, although since he used the “street” version of the word ending in “a” instead of “er” perhaps it was socially acceptable. Who knows the rules nowadays?? And of course the patriarch of this clown show is LaVar Ball, a man that makes Darth Vader look like Father of the Year. It baffles me that outlets like ESPN continue to give that man any sort of coverage.

 

Bill Nye The Science Guy

Not only does this “scientist” think anyone who doesn’t buy the climate change hype should be put in jail, but a few months ago he produced a bizarre video promoting the transgender agenda, saying that “sexuality is a spectrum and everyone is on it”. The truth is that Nye has a bachelor’s degree in mechanical engineering, making him less of a “science guy” than Star Trek’s fictional Mr. Spock.

 

Steve Kerr & Gregg Popovich

Not only are actors & talk show hosts doing it, but now NBA coaches feel the need to contribute their wisdom to the political discourse. The issue I have with these people is that a) their fanbase consists of people of varied ideologies, so it makes zero sense to alienate a big chunk of them, & b) their opinions are full of ignorance. Kerr, the coach of the Golden State Warriors, and Popovich, longtime coach of the San Antonio Spurs, clearly think they’re smarter than the average bear and enjoy lecturing those they feel are beneath them. Here’s the thing…both coaches are actually good at what they do for a living, and their teams will be amongst the heavily favored title contenders, but unfortunately I and many others will be rooting against them because they refused to keep their big mouths shut.

 

Maxine Waters & Sheila Jackson Lee

Waters has been representing California in Congress since 1991. Lee has been representing Texas in Congress since 1995. My question is…how?? Lee once said “I am a queen, and I demand to be treated like a queen”, and complained that hurricane names were “too lily white”, opining that “all racial groups should be represented” while suggesting future natural disaster names like Keisha, Jamal, & Deshawn. Waters has plainly stated that “this liberal would be about socializing, basically taking over and the government running all of your companies”, a disturbing idea to say the least. She also called the 1992 race riots in Los Angeles “somewhat understandable”, and said that “calling it a riot sounds like it was just a bunch of crazy people who went out and did bad things for no reason…so I call it a rebellion”. These are just a few examples of the stupidity these two have exhibited. It seems like every time they’re in front of a microphone they say something that makes one legitimately question their sanity. Look, folks can elect who they want, but come on California & Texas…I’m pretty sure you can do better.

 

Commissioner Fidel Goodell

Roger Goodell became NFL Commissioner in 2006. In the ensuing decade+ we’ve seen his “personal conduct policy” issue a plethora of random fines & suspensions for off field issues, which is kind of like your boss holding you accountable for what you do with your free time off the clock. On the field the game has become a shell of itself, with what used to be perfectly legitimate tackles now resulting in penalties and even more fines & suspensions, and instant replay becoming an albatross that has redefined what used to be the fairly simple process of catching a football. Goodell has bungled things like DeflateGate and the Ray Rice investigation, among other things. In 2017 he lost total control of the league as a bunch of spoiled rich thugs decided that they hate the country that has given them the freedom & opportunity to make a fantastic living using their God given athletic skills. It is simply time for Goodell to go. He has become the story, and the league commissioner should never command that kind of spotlight.

 

The Hollywood Elite

I love television & movies. I always have & always will. But good Lord do they make it difficult. I’ve been aware for many years that morality is in short supply in Tinseltown and made my peace with it, but in 2017 the hypocrisy became too much to overlook. They lecture the masses about gun control while making a ton of violent movies and having armed security protect them at all times. They whine & cry about equality & respect for women, and then we find out that sexual harassment has been rampant in their “community” for decades. They promote the “LGBTQ” agenda while being totally dismissive of anyone who might believe in a book you may have heard of called The Bible. They allegedly stand up for the little guy, but live a life of opulence so out of touch with those in flyover country that it’d be laughable if it weren’t so pathetic. They make speeches about environmentalism & climate change but then hop on their private jets to go home to their mansions, in the process making a larger “carbon footprint” than any ten people. They want you & I to give up our rights & live without modern conveniences while they enjoy the high life and sacrifice nothing. They believe that we should open up the floodgates and welcome all kinds of criminals & miscreants from all over the world into our nation, but rest assured none of them would let a family of refugees sleep in one of their spare bedrooms. And then Donald Trump happened, and the entire Hollywood community has had a yearlong hissy fit that I assume will continue into the foreseeable future. Just like pro athletes that have expressed their strong opinions in the past twelve months these actors, actresses, directors, producers, etc. have every right to their beliefs, but given their hypocrisy and lack of ethics we have the right to not give a damn what they think.

 

 

 

 

And the Sammy goes to…..

 

 

 

All of them!! Y’all know the drill by now. These people just need to shut their pieholes. Go away. Get out. Good riddance. Don’t let the door hit you where the Good Lord split you.

 

 

 

To present our next award it is our pleasure to introduce two of our favorite performers. She is the star of films like Mean Girls, Wedding Crashers, & The Family Stone, while he is an SNL alum who has hosted talk shows, been in a few movies, and has had a long & successful career as a stand-up comedian. Please welcome Rachel McAdams & Dennis Miller!! And the nominees are:

 

 

 

Most Entertaining Program (Radio or TV)

 

The Big Bang Theory

Is it showing its age after eleven seasons?? Yes. But is it still a well-written & funny show?? Absolutely. It’s odd to think that we’ve now spent over a decade watching this group of characters and all of their zany adventures.

 

The Young and the Restless

I don’t make New Year’s resolutions, but a year ago I did seriously ponder giving up my soap operas. Alas, I just can’t quit Y&R. My father watches it too, which makes me chuckle. The writing isn’t always as tight as I’d prefer, but the performances are mostly outstanding given the material with which the actors are working.

 

Designated Survivor

I knew when Designated Survivor premiered that it might have a limited shelf life. Once the initial mystery that was the entire foundation of the show was unraveled it had no choice but to morph into a 24/West Wing hybrid in which there’s a different crisis to resolve each week. That’s not necessarily bad, but it’s not as compelling as the original premise. I began to lose interest early on in the current second season and actually need to go back and stream the episodes I’ve missed.

 

MetroNews Hotline

From 3-6pm each weekday afternoon here in WV we have the opportunity to listen to a statewide radio talk show that covers everything from current events & sports to pop culture & the financial markets. It’s comfort food radio, which in my book is a great thing. A year ago the original host stepped down to pursue other opportunities, but the new guy has grown on me. I don’t listen to all three hours every day, but if I happen to be in my truck when the program is on I’ll usually listen. God knows it’s better than the garbage the music stations are playing.

 

WWE Raw

Monday night is still wrestling night in The Manoverse. Sometimes I’ll flip back & forth to the Monday night game during football season, but generally I am all about my wrasslin’ for a few hours, although these days I actually doze off occasionally, mostly because my internal clock is jacked up for various reasons. WWE has made a concerted effort to become more family friendly in recent years, which is a blessing & a curse. Pro wrestling has always had its ebbs & tides, and right now seems to be a bit of a lull. Still though, there are weeks when it’s really fun to be a wrestling fan.

 

Highly Questionable

Dan LeBatard & his Papi (along with whoever is co-hosting) have slowly risen up to become my favorite ESPN talk show. If I’m home I’ll watch, and if I’m not going to be home I utilize the DVR. It’s irreverant, occasionally silly, sometimes informative, & always easily palatable.

 

General Hospital

I can’t seem to quit GH either. I’ve been watching since grade school. There are certainly better things I could be spending time on, but I suppose there are worse things as well.

 

The Rush Limbaugh Program

El Rushbo is still going strong after three decades on the radio. I’m not as into politics as I once was and don’t listen often, but always enjoy the show when I do. I understand that he doesn’t frost everyone’s cupcake, and that’s alright. It’s rather amusing to me that two decades ago he was thought to be so provocative, but these days, amongst the plethora of contentious sociopolitical rhetoric from so many media outlets, Rush Limbaugh has actually morphed into the “harmless loveable fuzzball” that he has always proclaimed himself to be.

 

Jeopardy!

Some may disagree, but I contend that Jeopardy! is the best game show of all time. It actually rewards people for being intelligent, and really, who could have an issue with that??

 

This Is Us

Entertainment Weekly calls This Is Us “a refreshing respite from the relational violence and pessimism that marks other buzz soaps that have bubbled forth from a culture of divisiveness”. In other words, it’s not about violence, sex, or a social agenda. The show is an old-fashioned family drama with a unique twist that is particularly well-written & performed.

 

Pardon the Interruption

In contrast to its ESPN brethren Highly Questionable, PTI is proudly & audaciously cantankerous. Hosts Tony Kornheiser & Michael Wilbon like to shout at each other for no apparent reason, but it kind of works. It’s appointment TV for me, and I usually record it if I’m not going to be home. Every once in a great while Tony & Mike will go political (Wilbon loves to talk about “plantation mentality”), and sometimes I have to change the channel. However, thankfully that doesn’t happen too often so I’m willing to overlook it.

 

 

 

And the Sammy goes to…..

 

 

 

This Is Us. I rarely get excited about anything on television anymore. Perhaps that is indicative of age, maturity, & refined taste. Or maybe it’s just that Hollywood truly has gone to hell and rarely produces anything worth one’s time & effort. This Is Us is an exception. To call it a home run somehow feels inadequate. The cast is top notch, and the writing is unrivaled.

 

 

Our next award is a very special honor for a long time presence on our show. To make the presentation please welcome comedian & master impressionist Frank Caliendo!!

 

 

 

The Duffer-Herrell Lifetime Achievement Award

 

Mike & Mike in the Morning

November 17, 2017 was a gloomy day for sports fans. For 17 years many had spent atleast part of their weekday mornings with former NFL defensive lineman Mike Golic and nerdy sportscaster Mike Greenberg, as well as an immensely deep roster of in-studio & call-in guests. It began as a radio show and at its heart remained so, but from fairly early on in its run was simulcast on ESPN2. I was a little late to the Mike & Mike party, first becoming aware of it somewhere between 2006 & 2008 (my memory is a little fuzzy), but quickly became hooked. I’ve heaped plenty of praise on the program over the years, and offered some constructive criticism as well. Rumors of its demise began as far back as two or three years ago, but this past spring it became official. Whether it was ESPN’s decision to break up the duo and attempt to double their success with two shows instead of one, or Greeny felt compelled to spread his wings and do something different is unknown to the masses. Perhaps the truth is a concoction of those and other reasons. Greeny & Golic publicly put to rest any rumors of a rift between the two of them, and unless they are gifted actors on par with Al Pacino & Tom Hanks I have no reason to doubt that claim. I think they were more upset about how the situation was handled, which isn’t surprising given how poorly ESPN has dealt with various other matters recently. At any rate, Mike & Mike was nominated for six Sammys over the years, winning four straight at one point. I believe I once called it “comfort food television”, because watching two guys discuss sports (with a healthy dose of pop culture & general merriment on occasion) for four hours was a fantastic way to begin the morning. Golic is now doing essentially the same show with Trey Wingo, while Greeny will be getting a TV only program called Get Up beginning in April with co-hosts Michelle Beadle & Jalen Rose. I like Golic & Wingo just fine, though it is…thus far…a tepid reproduction of Mike & Mike, while I’m not at all excited about Get Up since neither Beadle nor Rose frost my cupcake. It’s all about chemistry, and Mike & Mike was lightning in a bottle. Greeny & Golic complemented one another spectacularly. There were times when the first thing I did when I woke up or returned home from my midnight shift was turn on Mike & Mike to get their take on the latest sports news. Since it ended a couple of months ago my television now usually stays off until much later in the morning. Kudos to all involved for creating great memories and producing something entertaining & informative enough to spend time on at 6am. Mike & Mike is greatly missed, and I feel like ESPN made a huge mistake.

 

 

 

 

 

Let’s take another break. Stay tuned for the sensational conclusion of the 2017 Sammy Awards…coming soon!!

The 2017 Sammy Awards – Part 1

Before we get too far into a new year it is time once again to take one final look back at the year that was 2017. This is the seventh presentation of The Sammy Awards, the world’s wittiest fantasy awards show. I’d like to imagine that The Sammys would be streamed on Netflix or Hulu, and could be produced efficiently yet in a tasteful & entertaining manner…less bloated & pompous than some awards programs, but more respectful & sophisticated than others. It is intended to be a year in review, an honest appraisal of the previous twelve months…the fun & the tragedy, the heroic & the forgettable, the sublime & the ridiculous.

 

 

 

Our host this year is fresh off a gig co-hosting CNN’s New Year’s Eve coverage that was hotly debated on social media. He is also the host of Bravo’s Watch What Happens Live, so we’re pretty confident he can handle the Sammy Awards stage. Please give a warm welcome to Andy Cohen!!

 

 

After some humorous opening remarks from our host this year’s show begins with a musical performance. Because we’re not worried about being hip, cool, lit, or woke it is a huge honor to welcome to the stage…singing a medley of some of his biggest hits…rock music icon Billy Joel!!

 

Wow!! Thanks to The Piano Man…that was off the chain!!

 

To present our first award please give a polite golf clap to three time Masters Champion Phil Mickelson!!

And the nominees are:

 

 

Best Sports Story

 

Tar Heels Title

The conclusion of March Madness saw the North Carolina Tar Heels defeat the Gonzaga Bulldogs to win their sixth NCAA basketball national championship.

 

ESPN Downsizing

This past spring The Mothership in Bristol, CT did a massive personnel purge, ridding themselves of over 100 employees. Among the cuts were familiar faces like MLB reporter Jayson Stark, NFL reporters John Clayton & Ed Werder and analyst Trent Dilfer, college basketball analyst Len Elmore & reporter Andy Katz, college football analyst Danny Kanell, and Sportscenter anchors Jay Crawford & Jade McCarthy.

 

Patriots Win…Again

Ugh. The New England Patriots won their fifth Super Bowl in grand fashion. They completed the biggest comeback in Super Bowl history (25 points) and forced the game into the first overtime on its 50+ year history.

 

Penguins Repeat

The Pittsburgh Penguins won their second straight Stanley Cup (and their fifth since 1990) by defeating the Nashville Predators in six games.

 

Clemson Wins Playoff

The Clemson Tigers played in their second straight college football National Championship, both against the Alabama Crimson Tide. But this time they won the title with a very exciting last second touchdown pass from QB Deshaun Watson to WR Hunter Renfrow.

 

Indians Win Streak

They didn’t end up playing in the World Series, but back in August & September the Cleveland Indians had the attention of baseball fans everywhere when they won 22 straight games, a new American League record.

 

JJ Watt’s Philanthropy

After Hurricane Harvey devastated Houston, TX in August Texans’ All-Pro defensive lineman JJ Watt began a fundraising effort to help the city. His initial goal was $200k. The final tally?? Over $37 million. The NFL has been given a lot of grief the past few years…with good reason. But Watt seems like one of the good guys. Well done sir. Kudos.

 

Warriors Win Another Title

The NBA bores me, but I usually watch the playoffs. Last summer the Golden State Warriors met the Cleveland Cavaliers for the third consecutive year in the NBA Finals. The Warriors were just too much for the Cavs and won the championship in five games.

 

Sergio Wins The Masters

Sergio Garcia has long been saddled with the moniker of “best golfer not to have won a major”. He ended that conversation in April when he defeated Justin Rose in a sudden death playoff at Augusta to finally get the monkey off his back.

 

Dale Jr.’s Retirement

Dale Earnhardt Jr. has been NASCAR’s most popular driver since he first began racing in the late 1990’s, grabbing onto the impressive coattails of his famous father and holding on for dear life. He became a tepid substitute for his Dad after Dale Sr.’s tragic death at the 2001 Daytona 500, and soiled his legacy beyond repair in 2008 when he sold out and joined the evil empire of Hendrick Motorsports. Dale Jr. won two Daytona 500s and zero NASCAR Cup championships. In 2016 he missed a big chunk of the season with concussion issues, and last spring announced that he would be retiring after the 2017 season.

 

Astros Win World Series

The Houston Astros were a MLB expansion team in 1962. In 2013 they moved from the National League to the American League due to MLB realignment. They lost over 100 games for three consecutive seasons from 2011-13. But slowly they began to build a contender, and it all came together this autumn when the Astros beat the Los Angeles Dodgers in seven games. It was a great story, especially given the circumstances surrounding the city of Houston after Hurricane Harvey, however we shouldn’t overlook the fact that Houston, TX is the fourth largest city in the United States, so this wasn’t exactly a David vs. Goliath upset by small market little guys.

 

Mayweather-McGregor

My nephews love UFC/MMA…aka ultimate fighting or mixed martial arts. A lot of people do. UFC has grown exponentially in the past decade. But I just can’t get into it for whatever reason. At any rate, one of UFC’s champions & biggest stars is brash & outspoken Irishman Conor McGregor. In 2017 he decided he wanted to test himself in a boxing ring, and he challenged Floyd Mayweather Jr., who many consider the greatest boxer alive and who happens to be just as cocky as McGregor. The matchup was a marketing dream come true. Mayweather made over $100 million, while McGregor was paid in excess of $30 million. The sports media slobbered all over themselves for months. Fans paid $100 to watch the fight on PPV. But all along the talking heads admitted that they didn’t foresee a competitive fight and predicted a fairly easy Mayweather victory, which is pretty much what happened. Mayweather probably could have won in the first round, but he let McGregor hang around for ten rounds before winning with a TKO, thus giving fans the illusion that the fight was worth the money they’d spent and the hype surrounding it. I didn’t watch a) because I had absolutely no interest, and b) there is no way in hell I’d pay $100 for anything on PPV.

 

 

 

And the Sammy goes to…..

 

 

 

Mayweather-McGregor. It wasn’t my cup o’ tea, but I recognize that a lot of people watched it and the sports media did a nice job of hyping it up into an event, even though most understood that it probably wasn’t going to be that competitive. And then lo & behold it went ten rounds. Whether you believe that McGregor is really skilled enough to have legitimately kept up with Mayweather for that long or if you take the cynical view that Mayweather made a conscious business decision to allow the fight to last as long as it did doesn’t really matter. The fact is that everyone involved laughed all the way to the bank, and most fans probably don’t regret the time or money they spent. Everybody wins.

 

 

To present a very special award please welcome an Emmy nominated & Golden Globe winning comedian & actor, the star of television hits Home Improvement and Last Man Standing as well as films like Toy Story, Galaxy Quest, & The Santa Clause…Tim Allen!!

 

 

 

 

The Fred Berry Memorial Award for Excellence in Syndication

 

Frasier

For eleven seasons, from 1993 to 2004, Dr. Frasier Crane and his wacky family & work colleagues…effete brother Niles, blue collar father Martin, live-in aide Daphne Moon, flirtatious producer Roz Doyle, bombastic sports radio host Bulldog, oddball co-workers Gil & Noel, and a host of others…came into our living rooms. Frasier Crane had already been with us for a decade, originally appearing on Cheers. Though Frasier was technically a spinoff of Cheers the two shows are very different, albeit similarly well written & both very funny. It may seem blasphemous to some, but I must admit to loving Frasier even more than Cheers. Whereas Cheers took place in a bar, Frasier was about a family, and specifically about an educated, cultured man dealing with all manner of frustrating madness surrounding him. I always felt very connected to Frasier, so it has been a delight this past year to be able to watch a plethora of reruns, usually very late at night, on Hallmark. And they don’t just air one or two episodes. There is…I believe…a three hour block almost every night. I’m not always up that late (or early, depending on one’s perspective), but when I am awake and in a channel surfing mood it is always a pleasure to run across one of my favorite sitcoms of all time. The show has aged remarkably well, and I appreciate the skillfully scripted dialogue & talented cast even more now than I did two decades ago. I’ve reached a point in my life where I don’t feel compelled to check out every new TV show that pops up. Most of them don’t seem like my cup o’ tea anyway. Fortunately I am alive in an era when it is fairly easy to go back and enjoy programs of yesteryear that I know I enjoy. Kudos to Hallmark for introducing a whole new generation to the exquisite charm of Frasier, and a tip of the cap to all involved for creating a show that has stood the test of time.

 

 

We are amped to introduce our next presenter. He’s a former ten time World Heavyweight Champion, and upon his retirement from professional wrestling has starred in films like Be Cool, Get Smart, Baywatch, & numerous entries in the Fast & Furious franchise. Do you smell what he’s cookin’?? FINALLY…Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson has come to The Sammy Awards!! And the nominees are:

 

 

 

The Twitter Award for Most Interesting Water Cooler Topic

 

Cracker Barrel Fires Brad’s Wife

Nanette Reid was an employee of 11 years at an Indiana Cracker Barrel before she was terminated. Nanette’s husband Brad wanted to know why his wife had been fired, so he made an inquiry on the restaurant’s corporate Facebook page…and things took off from there. #JusticeforBradsWife went viral and lives on.

 

The End of The Circus

After almost 150 years of entertaining the masses Ringling Bros. and Barnum & Bailey Circus put on its last show this past spring. The plethora of 21st century entertainment options as well as politically correct social justice warriors whining about animal abuse led to a decline in profitability and the eventual demise of the circus.

 

Fidget Spinner

I don’t know…it’s some sort of toy for nervous people. I suppose it’s a better option than drugs or homicide.

 

Great American Eclipse

On August 21, 2017 the United States enjoyed a total solar eclipse, the first visible in America since 1979. People gathered in large crowds and some traveled great distances just to see an event that lasted about as long as it takes to go to the bathroom while the ballgame is in a commercial break. I was kind of into it until I found out that viewing the eclipse required special sunglasses or otherwise one might go blind, and by the time I learned that helpful nugget every place was sold out of the glasses so it just became a hassle. However, as I watched the coverage on TV I kind of regretted my laziness. There is another eclipse coming in 2024, so if I’m still around I might make more of an effort.

 

Taking A Knee

NFL quarterback Colin Kaepernick spearheaded a movement in 2016 by kneeling instead of standing respectfully during the playing of the national anthem before football games. Kaepernick said that he refused to honor the flag of a country that oppresses “people of color”. In other words he was upset about alleged police brutality toward black folks. When Kaepernick found himself unemployed in 2017 (what a shock) other players decided to take up the cause. This upset President Trump, who offered some very blunt opinions on the subject. That caused more players to kneel, so the situation had evolved from protesting perceived racism to a hissy fit by people who don’t like Trump. It became a huge PR nightmare for the NFL. On one hand the United States is built on a foundation of freedom and the ability to express opinions, but conversely these protests are viewed by many as pointless, disrespectful to law enforcement & the military, and a juvenile temper tantrum by millionaires who play a game for a living.

 

iPhone X

Apple’s latest & greatest iPhone…complete with creepy facial recognition technology…went on sale in November (just in time for Christmas!). I’m an iPhone user, but I just upgraded a year ago and the $1000 price point might have finally exceeded my maximum utility.

 

The Royal Engagement

Prince Harry, younger son of Prince Charles & the late deified & beatified Princess Diana, got engaged to a filthy American, an inconsequential & marginally attractive actress named Meghan Markle. Congratulations to the happy couple. I’m sure this will be a bigger story in 2018 as the wedding day approaches this May.

 

United Airlines

On April 9, 2017, police at O’Hare International Airport in Chicago forcibly removed passenger Dr. David Dao from a United flight after he refused to depart the airplane upon the demand of management. Dao screamed as officers pulled him out of his seat, and his face hit an armrest during the struggle. Officers then dragged him, apparently unconscious, by his arms on his back along the aircraft aisle past rows of onlooking passengers. Video & photos of the incident went viral. Apparently the man was one of four passengers selected to be removed from the flight to make room for airline employees needing to get to Louisville. The other three were obviously more…compliant. Dao eventually received a monetary settlement from United. This was not an isolated incident, as similar stories were reported a few other times in 2017.

 

Kathy Griffin’s Career Decapitation

I’ve never found comedian Kathy Griffin funny…at all. She’s not the first person who has built a career out of being obnoxious, and she won’t be the last. Griffin has ticked people off before: she was banned from appearing on The View and Jay Leno’s incarnation of The Tonight Show, got fired from E! after making an inappropriate joke about then 11 year old actress Dakota Fanning, blasphemed Jesus when accepting an Emmy Award, & was banned from performing at New York’s famed Apollo Theater after using profanity. I’m no expert, but being shunned by The View has to be career rock bottom given the loathsome environment that surrounds that show like a noxious gas. However, Kathy Griffin really stepped in it last spring when she posted a video of herself holding the decapitated head of President Trump. The backlash was a little surprising. Since Hollywood hates Trump one might assume that Griffin’s career would reach new heights in the wake of the video, but the commoners in flyover country still wield some influence. She lost marketing deals, was dropped from CNN’s New Year’s Eve show that she’d co-hosted with Anderson Cooper since 2007, and her upcoming comedy tour imploded. Griffin has used social media to cry & moan about how she’s been mistreated in the aftermath of the brouhaha, but the simple fact is that she went too far and it bit her in the tookas.

 

Unicorn Frappuccino

I’ve patronized Starbucks exactly once in my life. I’m not a frequent coffee drinker, and when I do drink a cup I just want a basic, no frills cup o’ joe with some creamer (no sugar). This past spring Starbucks introduced a new addition to their menu…a multicolored drink made with ice, milk, pink powder, sour blue powder, crème frappuccino syrup, mango syrup, and blue drizzle, which sounds absolutely horrifying.

 

O.J.’s Release

OJ Simpson’s arrest & trial for murdering his ex-wife & her waiter friend was one of the biggest stories of the 1990’s. As we all know The Juice was found not guilty and was allowed to resume his dogged pursuit of the real killer. But that life was too boring for OJ, and he was ticked off about having to sell a bunch of his stuff after losing a civil suit brought by the victims’ families, so in 2007 he was arrested after an ill-conceived & poorly executed robbery at a Vegas casino during which he tried to get back some of his sports memorabilia. The following year Simpson was convicted of armed robbery and sentenced to 33 years in prison. Most legal experts agree that almost anyone else would have been given little more than a proverbial slap on the wrist, especially since all three of the co-defendants pled down to lesser charges. Many opine that Simpson’s conviction & harsh sentence was a “make-up call” after he’d escaped punishment for the 1994 double murder. OJ Simpson served nine years, and this past summer was granted parole. He was released from prison in October.

 

Civil War Monuments

Politically correct whining about Civil War monuments…specifically those erected to honor Confederate generals like Robert E. Lee & Stonewall Jackson…isn’t a new discussion. The debate has heated up the past few years. But arguments reached a fever pitch in 2017 after tragic events saw one person killed and 19 injured at a rally in Charlottesville, VA organized to protest the removal of a General Lee statue. My personal opinion is that these monuments were erected for a reason, and in most cases they honor complex yet worthy individuals who lived during a tumultuous time in our nation’s history and were forced to make some very difficult decisions. Thru the prism of time we recognize their mistakes and understand their errors in judgement, but I don’t feel that it is proper to erase our history. None of this was an issue a hundred years ago, fifty years ago, or even ten years ago, but nowadays we are a country full of easily offended social justice warriors who get their jollies trying to destroy everything about the United States with which they disagree.

 

 

 

And the Sammy goes to…..

 

 

 

Taking A Knee. Most sports fans just want to chill out and enjoy watching the ballgame. They want to argue about which team is better, debate who the best quarterback or wide receiver is, and kvetch about dreadful officiating. They do not want divisive sociopolitical rhetoric ruining their fun, but that’s exactly what’s been happening. It’s the reason ESPN is bleeding money and a contributing factor to declining attendance & TV ratings. The fact is that Colin Kaepernick is a marginally talented quarterback who is no longer worth the baggage that accompanies him…baggage that he created. The fact is that, while there are bad cops out there because there is incompetence in any & all professions, the vast majority of police officers do a fantastic job and should be praised for the dangerous work they do protecting all of us. The fact is that, while there are people that are erroneously & tragically killed by police officers, the odds are that anyone…black, white, Hispanic, Oriental, Middle Eastern, & any other hue one can think of…anyone who finds themselves in the presence of a police officer with a weapon has most likely put themselves in that situation. That’s not to say that those people deserve to be murdered…not at all. But you’ll never drown if you don’t go in the water and you won’t get burnt of you steer clear of fire. So if you’re living life right, obeying the law, & not causing a ruckus there is very little chance that you’ll be shot by a cop. There are 32 NFL teams. With 53 Players on each roster that’s nearly 1700 players. Of those, nearly 900 are convicted felons, which is over half the league. So while I admire their skill & athleticism and enjoy watching them play, forgive me if I have very little regard for their opinions on more serious matters.

 

 

 

 

 

This feels like an appropriate place to pause. Please stay tuned for Part 2!!

2017 Pigskin Picks of Profundity…..Week 18

It’s the last weekend of the NFL regular season and our final week of picks as well. After last week’s action in which I was 3-2 and Zach was 2-3 (that last second garbage TD for Philly was my favorite Christmas gift) we are all tied up for the season, which I’m sure has never happened before. So y’all know what I’m thinking?? That’s right…bonus picks!! It’ll be almost nine months before we get to do this again, so why not end 2017 with a bang?? All of these games have playoff implications, and I’ll do my best to lay it all out there as easily digestible as possible. Every NFL game will be on Sunday afternoon…no Thursday, Sunday, or Monday night games…which means that watching RedZone will be even more fun than usual. Say a little prayer for the bladder of host Scott Hanson. Yes, I realize Sunday is New Year’s Eve, but I rarely go out & do anything fun that night anyway, and anyone who is going to party won’t be getting started until long after the games are over, so the afternoon NFL lineup is really something to be excited about. Happy New Year Manoverse. May your 2018 be filled with joy, good health, & lots of fantastic football.

My Season:        51-50

Z’s Season:        51-50

 

 

 

 

 

 

Cincinnati          at      Baltimore (-9.5)

The Bengals aren’t going to the playoffs unless they buy a ticket, and this is very likely Marvin Lewis’ last game as their head coach after 15 up & down seasons in which his players spent more time in prison than the post-season. However, the Ravens’ playoff outlook is much rosier. Win & they’re in, but even if they lose this game they can still get into the playoffs if either Buffalo or Tennessee loses. The points make me a little nervous, and as a Steelers fan it’d warm my cockles to see Baltimore lose…but The Vibes are telling me they win big at home. Zach agrees on all counts. We’d both prefer to see Baltimore ousted from the playoffs, but it’s probably not going to happen.

My Pick:     Baltimore

Z’s Pick:     Baltimore

 

 

 

Jacksonville      at      Tennessee (-3.5)

The Jags have already won the division and are locked into the #3 spot in the AFC, but Tennessee has some work to do. The Titans would secure a wildcard with a victory…but a loss would mean that their only path to the playoffs would be losses by both the Los Angeles Chargers and the Buffalo Bills. That’s not necessarily far-fetched, but winning this game would certainly be a simpler solution. Jacksonville looked vulnerable in last week’s loss to San Francisco, but will that happen two weeks in a row?? Technically they have nothing to play for, but momentum heading into the post-season is important. If this game were being played in Florida it’d be a no-brainer, but playing at home with their backs against the wall might just be enough to motivate the Titans to a mildly surprising win. Conversely, Zach believes Jacksonville’s defense will come thru in the clutch and score them a close win.

My Pick:     Tennessee

Z’s Pick:     Jacksonville

 

 

 

Oakland             at      LA Chargers (-7.5)

The Raiders have had a disappointing season for sure…but a victory to end the year could certainly be good karma going into an offseason in which they’ll have the 11th pick in the draft and expectations will probably be high again for 2018. Conversely, the Chargers are still very much in the playoff hunt. They have to win this game and hope that the Titans & Bills both lose, which is a tall order. Either way they can only control what they do & how they play, and I think they’ll do just that. Zach didn’t learn a thing from the Eagles’ last second touchdown last week and is again picking the Raiders to atleast cover the points.

My Pick:     LA Chargers

Z’s Pick:     Oakland

 

 

 

New Orleans (-7)                  at      Tampa Bay

The Saints will be in the playoffs, but they’re still battling for a division title. They need a win to secure that crown. A loss coupled with a Carolina victory would make New Orleans a wildcard team. Tampa will have a Top 5 pick in the NFL Draft and has nothing to play for but pride. Is that enough?? I don’t think so…not even at home. Zach concurs.

My Pick:     New Orleans

Z’s Pick:     New Orleans

 

 

 

Carolina             at      Atlanta (-4)

The Panthers have to win and hope that the Saints lose. That’s the only way they win the NFC South…otherwise they’ll be a wildcard team. The Falcons…who represented the NFC in the Super Bowl a year ago and held a significant lead before an epic choke job…must win to secure a wildcard berth, or they could conceivably lose and still get in if Seattle also loses. I think this might be the best game of the weekend, and I’m going to pick the mild upset. Zach thinks Atlanta is just too erratic and has issues winning big games.

My Pick:     Carolina

Z’s Pick:     Carolina

 

 

 

Arizona               at      Seattle (-9)

The Cardinals are playing for pride and a .500 record. The Seahawks must win and hope for a Falcons loss to sneak into the post-season. If Seattle gets into the playoffs I think they can be a very dangerous opponent, but will they get there?? They can’t do anything about the Falcons, but they can go out & win this game. However, The Vibes are telling me the points are a bit much and it might be a lot closer than anyone expects. Zach disagrees and thinks Seattle will win easily.

My Pick:     Arizona

Z’s Pick:     Seatttle

 

 

 

Buffalo (-3)                  at      Miami

The Dolphins have been even more mediocre than I thought they’d be. Surely QB Jay Cutler will be gently pushed back into retirement after the season ends. Conversely, the Bills have been a huge surprise. I never thought they’d even be in the playoff discussion, but here they are with a chance…a very small chance. They must win this game and hope for a Ravens loss, or if Baltimore wins then losses by both Tennessee & the Chargers will do the trick. The biggest Bengals fans in the world might not be in Cincinnati on Sunday…they’ll be in Buffalo (or Bills personnel in Miami). As much as it pains me to say it, I think the road ends painfully for the Buffalo Bills this weekend. Zach believes otherwise.

My Pick:     Miami

Z’s Pick:     Buffalo

 

2017 Pigskin Picks of Profundity…..Week 17

To be honest, after the events of last weekend I wasn’t sure if we were going to continue these picks. I’ve been increasingly irritated by the NFL for awhile now, and things reached a crescendo on Sunday. I was pretty devastated and was not only ready to stop doing picks but seriously pondered quitting all of my fantasy football leagues too. Fortunately I have gotten to know myself pretty well over the years, and understand that when I get upset I always cool off after a day or two. It helped that I won a tight playoff game in my dynasty league and am playing for a championship this weekend. I’ve been in that particular league for over 15 years and have enjoyed it immensely, so I’m not quite ready to give it up. I really love doing these picks with my nephew as well, and can’t imagine not doing them anymore. So…we press on. Both Zach & myself went 2-3 last weekend, meaning that I’ve got some work to do to get back the season lead. We’ll see how it goes these next couple of weeks.

My Season:        48-48

Z’s Season:        49-47

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Miami                  at      Kansas City (-10)

Chiefs’ rookie RB Kareem Hunt was a stud for me in my dynasty league the first quarter of the season, but then he disappeared for a couple of months. Fortunately for me & KC he came up big last week and will hopefully do so again on Christmas Eve. The Chiefs lead the AFC West, but the surprising Los Angeles Chargers are hot on their heels. The wildcard field is rather crowded, which makes winning the division crown that much more important. The Dolphins aren’t going to the playoffs despite winning 2 out of their past 3 games, but they can play a spoiler role. Arrowhead Stadium is a pretty raucous home field, and I don’t think Miami has the talent to overcome Kansas City, but the points bother me just a bit. I’m a little nervous about it, but it’s another “go big or go home” moment. Zach thinks Kansas City is a little too inconsistent and he’s very uncomfortable with the double digit points.

My Pick:     Kansas City

Z’s Pick:     Miami

 

 

 

Atlanta                at      New Orleans (-5.5)

The NFC South is probably the most interesting division in the league at the moment. I wasn’t sure the Falcons were going to rise to the occasion after a bumpy first half of the season, but they’ve won four of the last five and look like a serious playoff contender. The problem is that the Carolina Panthers & the Saints have been just as good. Actually they’re both a game better and lead Atlanta by a game. I’m pretty confident that two of them are going to make the playoffs, but I’m not sure about all three. The Falcons won the first matchup between these two teams in Atlanta by a field goal, and I wouldn’t be surprised if…one way or another…it’s that close again. Zach likes Drew Brees to get the job done.

My Pick:     Atlanta

Z’s Pick:     New Orleans

 

 

 

L.A. Chargers (-7)      at      NY Jets

When did the Chargers become a playoff team?? Well okay, they’re not there yet…but they are in the conversation, which very few would have predicted a few months ago. Conversely, the Jets are just as awful as everyone knew they’d be. Their quarterback situation is pedestrian at best, and I’d be shocked if they didn’t use their first round pick in the draft to improve that position. Having said all that, this is the NFL, so anything can happen…but will it?? The game is being played in New York (well alright…New Jersey) in December, so maybe that could make a difference. Possibly. I don’t know. Zach doesn’t like the Jets’ chances with Bryce Petty under center.

My Pick:     NY Jets

Z’s Pick:     L.A. Chargers

 

 

 

Jacksonville (-4.5)     at      San Francisco

Everybody’s been talking about two other teams in the AFC, but while no one has been paying much attention the Jags have won ten games and already clinched the AFC South. They’re on a three game winning streak, and rookie RB Leonard Fournette has been as good as advertised, much to my surprise since I predicted he’d be a bust. The old axiom is that defense wins championships, and in Jacksonville their defense is quite formidable. So with a great defense and a solid running game it hasn’t really mattered that their quarterback is still Blake Bortles. Meanwhile, in ‘Frisco the quarterback does matter because the 49ers have won three straight with newly acquired Jimmy Garoppolo under center. That’s not going to save their season, but with the QB situation looking good and a Top 5 draft pick next spring the future looks positive. I think this will be a low scoring grind…good ol’ smashmouth football with turnovers and special teams making a difference, and I smell an upset. Zach likes Garoppolo…but he likes Jacksonville’s defense better.

My Pick:     San Francisco

Z’s Pick:     Jacksonville

 

 

 

Oakland             at      Philadelphia (-9)

What the heck happened to the Raiders?? Most “experts” thought they’d be a solid playoff team and maybe even win their division. Instead they are two games below .500 and aren’t getting anywhere near the playoffs. The story is much different in Philly, where they’ve already won the NFC East and are looking to clinch home field throughout the playoffs. I thought the loss of QB Carson Wentz might have a negative impact, but the Eagles beat the NY Giants last week with Nick Foles under center, and I see no reason to doubt they can do it again. I don’t believe in Philly as a Super Bowl contender, but I do think they’ll win this game pretty easily. Zach…much to my surprise…thinks this will be a close game, so he’s going with the underdogs to atleast cover the points.

My Pick:     Philadelphia

Z’s Pick:     Oakland

2017 Pigskin Picks of Profundity…..Week 16

Better late than never, right?? We weren’t going to pick the Thursday night game anyway, so it’s all good. This is a pretty neat weekend for football fans. Not only are there NFL games on both Saturday and Sunday, but the college bowl season gets underway as well. I hope y’all have your Christmas shopping finished and can stay home vegging out & watching football. Last week was pretty rough for yours truly, as I went 0-5. The blow was softened just a bit when I won an exciting game in my dynasty league and made the playoff, so I’m excited about that. Zach fared a little better at 2-3, which means that he’s taken back the season lead. We’ll see what happens after this weekend.

My Season:        46-45

Z’s Season:        47-44

 

 

 

 

Philadelphia (-7.5)      at      NY Giants

Holy quarterback condundrums Batman!! The Eagles have lost QB Carson Wentz for the remainder of the season to a torn ACL. The good news is that they’ve already clinched the NFC East, and as far as backups go there are worse options than Nick Foles. The Giants have Eli Manning back under center after firing their coach a couple of weeks ago, but other than that I’m not sure there is any good news for them. The Giants are actually worse than the Jets right now. Who would’ve predicted that a few months ago?? Having said that, The Vibes are whispering to me. While I think Foles is a decent quarterback and Philly is obviously a talented team, any thoughts of them being a legit Super Bowl contender have gone away, and I think The G-Men might actually steal this game. Zach disagrees and is making the more logical choice.

My Pick:     NY Giants

Z’s Pick:     Philadelphia

 

 

 

Green Bay          at      Carolina (-3)

As opposed to the folks in Philadelphia the Cheeseheads have good quarterback news. Aaron Rodgers returns from injury this week, and the sports media has been slobbering all over themselves. It’s going to be an uphill climb for Green Bay to sneak into the playoffs, but it is still mathematically possible. The Panthers are in a dogfight for a playoff spot as well. They’ve won 5 out of their last 6 games after a rough first half of the season, and feel like they could become a formidable post-season threat. I’m all for heartwarming fairy tales, but I think Rodgers’ comeback might not go as well as many hope it will. Zach concurs.

My Pick:     Carolina

Z’s Pick:     Carolina

 

 

 

Tennessee                  at      San Francisco (-2)

I really thought that the Titans were solid favorites to win the AFC South this season, but I don’t believe anybody saw the success of the Jacksonville Jaguars on the horizon. That being said, Tennessee is only one game out of first place and are in good wildcard position. Conversely, the 49ers are dwelling at the bottom of their division as has been the norm the past few years. I understand that it’s commonplace for the home team to be favored by about three points in NFL games, but I’m not sure why that would hold true in a game like this where the visiting team is clearly superior. Zach feels like Tennessee is too inconsistent and ‘Frisco is much better with Jimmy Garoppolo at quarterback.

My Pick:     Tennessee

Z’s Pick:     San Francisco

 

 

 

LA Rams            at                Seattle (-2.5)

The Rams hold a one game lead in the NFC West, but Seattle’s home field advantage is one of the most daunting in the NFL. The Seahawks have been more…erratic…this season than we’re used to seeing, but when the chips are down in big games it’s hard to bet against QB Russell Wilson, meaning that if they can get into the playoffs all the questions & inconsistency will quickly be set aside. Meanwhile, the Rams, with all of their young talent, have really put things together this year, though they’ve also been a little up & down. If this game were being played in Los Angeles I might be inclined to take the underdogs because that’s just how I roll. However, the home field is just too much to overlook in this case. Zach concurs.

My Pick:     Seattle

Z’s Pick:     Seattle

 

 

 

Atlanta (-6.5)               at      Tampa Bay

The NFC South is really interesting, with three teams being possible playoff contenders. One of those three, however, is not the Buccaneers. They’re currently on a three game losing streak, and that’s not even their worst skid of the season. I haven’t been paying enough attention to know exactly what has gone wrong, but I don’t foresee things suddenly turning around this weekend. The Falcons haven’t had smooth sailing this year after being in the Super Bowl last season, but they’ve done enough to still be in the playoff hunt and feel like they might be peaking at the right time. Zach likes Atlanta to win big.

My Pick:     Atlanta

Z’s Pick:     Atlanta

2017 Pigskin Picks of Profundity…..Week 15

Greetings fellow football fans!! Since we are picking the Thursday night game this week and I am woefully behind I shall not be verbose today. ‘Tis the season, and yours truly has been a busy elf without actually getting anything accomplished. I’ve been meaning to curb my inclination toward procrastination for years but haven’t quite gotten there yet. At any rate, I was 4-1 in picking the conference title games, while Zach was 3-2. I have a few thoughts about how all of that worked out, but I’ll include them with our bowl picks. Stay tuned. For the purposes of this fun little weekly competition we move on to the NFL for the stretch run. Enjoy.

My Season:        46-40

Z’s Season:        45-41

 

 

 

 

 

New Orleans (-1.5)     at      Atlanta

The NFC South is rather competitive. There’s a good chance that two teams from the division will end up in the playoffs, but finishing first would obviously be preferable. This is the Thursday night game, which players reportedly hate but fans kind of enjoy. It’s interesting to me that the Falcons aren’t favored on their home field. Zach likes the Saints’ running game to take some of the pressure off quarterback Drew Brees.

My Pick:     New Orleans

Z’s Pick:     New Orleans

 

 

 

Indianapolis                at      Buffalo (-3)

It’s been a rough year for the Colts. They are completely lost without quarterback Andrew Luck, but it seems like a 3-9 team probably has more than just one issue. Meanwhile, the Bills have dropped 4 out of the last 5 games and have not only fallen four games behind New England but wouldn’t even qualify for a wildcard if the season ended today. They also have quarterback issues, as the coaches are seesawing back & forth between Tyrod Taylor and rookie Nathan Peterman. Taylor is injured and might not be available this week, and that’s bad news for Buffalo. Zach is aware of the Bills’ quarterback conundrum, but believes that Indy is so bad it doesn’t matter.

My Pick:     Indianapolis

Z’s Pick:     Buffalo

 

 

 

Minnesota (-2.5)                   at      Carolina

Vikings’ QB Case Keenum has been a topic of conversation this week. Is he legit?? Or can he ever really shed the stank of “journeyman backup”?? He’s done pretty well so far in 2017, to the point that there’s buzz about a Vikings Super Bowl run, which would conclude in February on their home field. But let’s not count out the Panthers just yet. They’re right in the mix in the aforementioned NFC South and have won 4 out of their last 5. The matchup to watch is Carolina quarterback Cam Newton versus the Minnesota defense, and I am a firm believer that defense wins championships. Zach concurs.

My Pick:     Minnesota

Z’s Pick:     Minnesota

 

 

 

Philadelphia                at      L.A. Rams (-2)

In my season preview I predicted these teams to go a combined 11-21. Obviously I was wrong. Second year Rams QB Jared Goff has emerged as one of the best in the league, but of course so has Eagles QB Carson Wentz. I’m not sure Los Angeles has much of a home field advantage, but I can’t resist leaning in that direction. Zach thinks Philly will bounce back from last week’s loss and prove to be just a little better than the Rams.

My Pick:     L.A. Rams

Z’s Pick:     Philadelphia

 

 

 

Seattle                          at      Jacksonville (-3.5)

Ask most football fans and they’ll likely tell you they’re not quite ready to believe in the Jags just yet. It’s hard to get past the whole Blake Bortles thing. Conversely, the Legion of Boom has imploded and Seattle is a game behind in the NFC West, but a lot of folks would still consider them among the favorites to get to the Super Bowl. Fair?? Probably not, but that’s the situation. Jacksonville needs this win to quiet the doubters, while the Seahawks seeks to keep pace with the Rams. If the game were being played in Seattle it’d be an easy pick, but since it’s not there is reason for hesitation. Zach concurs.

My Pick:     Seattle

Z’s Pick:     Seattle

2017 Pigskin Picks of Profundity…..Week 11

It’s been a busy week so I am behind. That’s cool…I like being busy. At any rate, once again bonus picks weren’t a good idea, as I was 3-5 and Zach was only slightly better at 4-4. The college football playoff rankings remain the same at the top, although a few teams (most notably Penn St. & Ohio St.) have played themselves out of contention so the field is narrow. The NFL is a war of attrition on a scale I don’t recall seeing, with so many big stars out for the year with injuries. We’re going to do our best to stay / get back above .500, but it’s probably best if we take things slow with almost two months remaining in our season.

My Season:        30-34

Z’s Season:        33-31        

 

 

 

 

 

Washington (-6.5)      at      Stanford

The Pac 12 North is a three team race between Washington, Washington St., & Stanford. Whoever comes out on top is probably going to get left out of the college football playoff, but I suppose a conference title would be a nice consolation prize. On paper the Huskies are a better team, but Stanford does have the home field advantage and Heisman worthy running back Bryce Love. This is a late night game on Friday so I’ll be able to keep my eye on it at work. I’m going against the grain and with the home team underdogs. Zach is completely confused and believes Washington State coach Mike Leach is coaching in this game, which he is not. But anyway, he’s picking Washington…I think.

My Pick:     Stanford

Z’s Pick:     Washington

 

 

 

Iowa                                        at      Wisconsin (-12.5)

Undefeated Wisconsin is the Big Ten’s last remaining hope to have representation in the playoff, but unfortunately their weak early season schedule (Utah St., Florida Atlantic, BYU) isn’t doing them any favors. The Hawkeyes are coming off of a surprising beatdown of Ohio St., and I think if this game were being played in Iowa I might have to ponder whether they could pull off a shocker two weeks in a row. However, with everything that’s at stake and the fact that the game is in Madison I don’t think the Badgers are going to mess things up. Zach is unimpressed by Wisconsin and thinks Iowa is good enough to get a second straight huge upset win.

My Pick:     Wisconsin

Z’s Pick:     Iowa

 

 

Georgia (-2.5)              at      Auburn

I feel confident in assuming that the Bulldogs aren’t going to lose their final two games against Kentucky & Georgia Tech, and things are set up so that even if they’d lose the SEC title game to Alabama they’d probably still get a spot in the playoff. So, the only roadblock left for Georgia is traveling to Auburn. Meanwhile, the Tigers still have an outside chance to play in the conference championship (they have ‘Bama at home in a few weeks) and perhaps even make the playoff, but this is a must-win. I hope that this game is as good as it should be, and since I have a few issues with how the playoff is decided and therefore root for chaos, I am pulling for Auburn. Conversely, Zach thinks Georgia is unstoppable.

My Pick:     Auburn

Z’s Pick:     Georgia

 

 

Notre Dame (-3)           at      Miami (FL)

Back in the day some folks called this matchup Catholics vs. Convicts. ESPN even made a documentary about the rivalry using that title a couple of years ago. However, this is the first time in a long time that the game has really mattered in the bigger picture. The Irish are a solid playoff entrant at the moment, but that could easily change with a loss. Conversely, the Hurricanes are on the outside looking in and have to get a victory. They’re going to be playing in the ACC title game regardless, but obviously a playoff berth is a bigger goal. A lot of folks say Miami hadn’t really played anyone until they beat Virginia Tech last week, and that may be a valid point. Notre Dame has had the tougher schedule…but not that much tougher unless you’re counting #1 Georgia, a game Notre Dame lost. I’m a sucker for home field advantage. I really do think it can make a difference, especially in college. That’s why I am leaning toward Miami. Zach concurs.

My Pick:     Miami (FL)

Z’s Pick:     Miami (FL)

 

 

New England (-7.5)    at      Denver

The Patriots have reeled off four straight victories after a shaky start to the season, but still hold only a one game lead over Buffalo in the AFC East. Conversely, quarterback woes have doomed the 3-5 Broncos. I don’t know who’s starting behind center for Denver this week, but I don’t think it matters all that much. This is the Sunday night game on NBC, and since its being played in Mile High territory I guess there is always a chance it might be more fun & competitive than one might assume…but probably not. Zach believes the Pats will win big…possibly four TDs big.

My Pick:     New England

Z’s Pick:     New England