A semi-regular attempt to address some of life’s minutiae that might otherwise be overlooked…..
I will not poke fun or criticize government employees fearful of losing their jobs. Anyone who has ever been fired or “downsized” understands their concern. Having said that, the insane overreaction to Elon Musk & DOGE is baffling. First of all, the amount of waste and absolute corruption that has been found is quite alarming, yet way too many people seem to be completely ignoring it. Secondly, the whole point of Musk asking government workers to reply to an email stating five things they do on the job is simply to prove they actually exist. Why?? Apparently there have been federal employees & social security recipients receiving checks who a) are 150 years old 🤔 or b) never existed in the first place, which obviously raises alot of questions. Also, if a government agency had 15k employees five years ago but has 25k now, I think asking why that number ballooned so exponentially in just the past few years is fair. If 10k people lose their jobs it is unfortunate for them and no one is denying that, but it is also clear that those 10k jobs were superfluous. If the agency ran smoothly with less employees then the additional staff is, in the big picture, wasteful. Elon Musk was hired to trim the fat, and he is doing exactly that. It happens in the private sector on a daily basis. It is understandable that people would be upset about losing a gig that, in most instances, pays well and offers good benefits. It makes even more sense that people who, in some cases, lose a rather comfortable gig that pays them well while not demanding much, would be angry. Having said all of that, may I suggest that, instead of acting like a petulant child after losing a job that, in the grand scheme of life, was apparently unnecessary, you instead channel that energy into moving on to something bigger, better, and more worthy of your skills & talent.
Rewatching the same movie or television show again & again isn’t a sign of laziness, it is actually a form of emotional regulation. When life feels overwhelming or unpredictable, your brain craves familiarity. Watching a show or movie you already know gives you a sense of control, comfort, and stability. There are no surprises & no tension. You know exactly what happens next, and that predictability helps calm your nervous system. A study from the University of Chicago found that people are more likely to return to familiar movies & TV shows when they feel depleted or emotionally drained. Rewatching provides a way to restore energy and regain a sense of peace. In moments when the world feels uncertain your brain reaches for what it knows.
Pop star Katy Perry is NOT an astronaut. Neither is Jeff Bezos’ wife Laura Sanchez or Oprah Winfrey’s gal pal Gayle King. I don’t want to engage in wacky conspiracy theories, so we will proceed on the assumption that Blue Origin’s space dildo did actually take flight. Contrary to King’s whining, what those ladies’ participated in was indeed a joy ride, not a mission. They barely penetrated space for ten minutes. I am sure it was a very cool moment, but instead of simply expressing gratitude for an opportunity they most certainly didn’t earn, an experience that was handed to them based on fame, fortune, and connections, they could not stop themselves from pompously bloviating in an effort to convince the masses that they’d accomplished something meaningful. I’ve had bowel movements that lasted longer than their little jaunt into “space”, and the fact that it received more media coverage than the March rescue of actual astronauts that had been stranded on the International Space Station for nine months is nauseating. Society’s culture of celebrity worship is misguided at best, and a sad symptom of much bigger issues.
It’s time to put a bow on the football season and perhaps address one or two other issues.
It’s hard to believe that only a few weeks have passed since Ohio St. won the CFP Championship. It feels like a lifetime ago. At any rate, kudos to the Buckeyes, who blew past Tennessee, Oregon, and Texas with relative ease before mostly dominating Notre Dame in the title game, despite not even playing in the Big Ten Championship and being seeded 8th in the CFP. It was the inaugural season for the 12 team playoff, and despite my initial misgivings about that expansion I cannot deny that it was successful and solidly entertaining. I do believe the formula will eventually be tweaked a bit, but before the inevitable expansion to 16 teams I hope the powers-that-be iron out the seeding process, and really, I would love to see conference title games incorporated into the first round of the playoff. I also believe that the FBS needs to split, with the Group of Five conferences playing for their own title while the Power 4 teams do their thing. Anyway, those are rabbit holes we can dive into some other time.
Congratulations to the Philadelphia Eagles, who gave the Kansas City Chiefs a surprising Super Bowl beatdown to claim their second Lombardi Trophy in seven years and deny KC an unprecedented three-peat. My sports fandom is fueled by disdain more than I’d prefer to admit, but I don’t hold any particular ill will toward either team and therefore didn’t have a dog in the fight. I don’t even suffer from Chiefs fatigue yet, and am not all that bothered by the whole Travis Kelce/Taylor Swift situation. My only wish was for a fun, competitive contest, and in that regard the game fell woefully short.
On the same day that Philly won the Super Bowl, legendary basketball broadcaster Hubie Brown ended his career that lasted a half century, first as a coach then as an analyst on TV. It has been well-established that I don’t pay much attention to the NBA regular season, but to the extent that I have watched games thru the years Brown has been a constant presence…a soothing, knowledgeable voice who provided insightful analysis and focused on teaching fans about the game he so clearly loves instead of trying to be the kind of personality who draws attention to themselves that has become pervasive as television grew into the dominant force in sports. ABC did a nice job of honoring 91 year old Brown during his final broadcast without disrespecting the game itself (a fairly prosaic victory for the Milwaukee Bucks over the Philadelphia 76ers).
I will not dump all over the Super Bowl halftime featuring rapper Kendrick Lamar. I don’t want to become one of those hypercritical old goats who begin every commentary with “back in my day”, so suffice to say that the show wasn’t my cup o’ tea. However, I knew that going in. I am fully aware that middle aged white guys, despite all accusations of “privilege”, are not the target demographic for much of anything. I’ll spare all of us a breakdown of why that is, and just say that I am fine with it. However, from a business perspective I would suggest to the NFL that such a prominent position should probably be occupied by a performer with much broader appeal. I am sure that there are people who enjoyed Kendrick Lamar immensely, but I don’t believe it was an impactful chunk of the viewing audience.
After a full season of watching the NFL’s new dynamic kickoff I have to say that I don’t despise it, except for one significant issue. I hate that onside kicks have essentially been eliminated from the game, and teams can’t even declare their intention to try an onside until the 4th quarter. I don’t believe that trick plays (including a surprise onside kick) should be used recklessly, but to preclude such a possibility at all negates an intriguing layer of strategery.
Both Zach & myself limped to the finish in our weekly picks, going 3-5 in the final week. That means I finished 56-61, while he was 55-62. It’s a rather pyrrhic victory that enforces the fact that we aren’t very good at prognosticating football games and would probably both be homeless bums if we chose to gamble with real money.
On January 8, 2018, QB Jalen Hurts was benched at halftime of college football’s national title game. Freshman Tua Tagovailoa came in and led Alabama to a comeback victory in overtime. Hurts spent the following season as Tagovailoa’s backup before transferring to Oklahoma. Seven years later Tagovailoa has spent most of his five year NFL career struggling to convince “experts” he should remain the Miami Dolphins’ starter while compiling a 38-24 record with only one postseason game. Conversely, Hurts has led the Philadelphia Eagles to two Super Bowls, winning one while being named the game’s MVP. There are alot of valuable lessons to be learned from that story.
A semi-regular attempt to address some of life’s minutiae that might otherwise be overlooked…..
When the Frasier reboot on Paramount+ was announced a few years ago I was SO excited. OG Frasier is one of the best sitcoms of all time, and I just knew the reboot would be fantastic. Then the first season premiered in October 2023, and though I was pleased to see my pal Dr. Crane onscreen once again, it just didn’t have the same je ne sais quoi. It was a pleasant enough show, but unremarkable. What made the original great was a) the ensemble & b) superb writing. Neither element worked in the follow-up. Season 2 premiered last September, and four months later I have not watched a single episode. I’ll get around to it eventually, but my lack of enthusiasm is obvious. Now it has been announced that Paramount+ canceled the series. I suppose another streaming platform may extend a lifeline, and if that happens I hope the powers-that-be will make necessary changes and inject the show with moxie & palpable wit. However, if this is the end of the road for Frasier Crane that’s okay too. His formidable legacy remains largely unscathed.
I have considered becoming a “content creator” for various reasons, but the truth is that I’m not that creative, and despite being an infrequent blogger my assumption is that no one would have much interest in my spin on things. Since I have never created a video & likely never will, the comically brief TikTok ban here in the United States had virtually no impact on my life. Having said that, I am generally not in favor of banning things, especially when no one can properly articulate the harm. First of all, why are we trying to ban an app because it is owned by a Chinese company, yet we have allowed China to buy a whole lot of American land?? Which is more detrimental or potentially outright dangerous?? Secondly, if one is concerned about social media manipulation, then let’s ban Facebook, Instagram, Twitter/X, and Google as well, since we all understand the social engineering & political machinations those entities have engaged in. I’ll cop to ignorance of the details in this situation, but isn’t TikTok a mostly innocuous platform for kids & very lonely adults to post silly and largely inconsequential videos that provide brief snippets of entertainment?? Am I being naive?? Biden, Trump, or someone stepped in to negotiate a compromise, and I assume the long term hope is for TikTok to be purchased by an American company, which would assuage most concerns. Or perhaps the entrepreneurial spirit will eventually prevail and a new & improved app that provides all the same bells & whistles will emerge. Y’all keep me posted…I’ll be here reading a book.
A few thoughts on the recent Presidential Inauguration:
Whether the event was moved indoors due to cold weather (the official explanation) or there were safety concerns (likely valid) in the wake of previous attempts on President Trump’s life, it’s a shame because it truly diminished the ceremony’s usual majesty.
I don’t share others’ concerns about a perceived oligarchy, but it was odd to see Big Tech billionaires like Mark Zuckerberg & Jeff Bezos sitting in such prominent positions. I suppose Trump might be playing chess by employing a Corleone inspired “keep your enemies closer” strategy, but it was a slightly disturbing visual given the manipulation those folks have participated in the past few years. Leftists scoff at conservative allegations about the Soros Family, but part of that is because they are smart enough to remain mostly in the shadows and the politicians they…influence…retain plausible deniability.
Speaking of the tech guys…no, Elon Musk was not giving a freakin’ Nazi salute. If you believe that you’re exactly the kind of simpleton the media has been playing like a fiddle for decades. Trust me when I tell you…the Trump Administration, just like anyone else in power, will make their fair share of mistakes & miscalculations that’ll be justly criticized. Y’all don’t need to fabricate BS.
Kudos to Carrie Underwood, who reacted with grace under fire when there was an equipment malfunction. I don’t know enough about such things to opine, but I realize it wasn’t an ideal setup or the arrangement she was expecting at all. It turned out to be a happy accident though, as I think most would agree that Ms. Underwood’s acappella performance of America the Beautiful was powerful & inspiring.
I am not a Presidential scholar, but the concepts of “preemptive” pardons & executive orders make me a bit squeamish no matter which political party is wielding the pen. They seem like rather dictatorial ideas for a constitutional republic.
It was a lovely spring weekend, a week or two before Mother’s Day as I recall. My original plan was to vegg out and be a total waste of space, but, as we’re told in the 19th chapter of Proverbs, “there are many plans in a man’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails”, so when my neighbor texted me I was persuaded to pivot. There is an indoor flea market just down the road that’s open only on weekends, and we’d been there once before. I wasn’t particularly enamored, but he wanted to see if they still had a certain item. Before long, off we went to The Swap Meet, and as I was driving I realized that there was indeed a purpose for the task other than being a benevolent neighbor.
For Christmas my father had gotten each of us a leather keychain with our name engraved. Nothing fancy or extravagant, but practical with a personal touch. Both my sister & I had grown beyond focusing on Christmas gifts as a big deal, and my nephews are fully grown adults. I’m a gift card guy, because I just don’t enjoy the hustle & bustle of the whole retail scene as much as I used to, and, like my Dad, I tend to lean toward pragmatism. Truth be told, Christmas hadn’t been the same for DaLynn, Dad, or myself since Mom passed more than two decades ago. In recent years we’d actually gone out to eat for Christmas a few times, but it’s tough to find a place open on the actual day unless you really like Chinese food. At any rate, my nephews were insistent that we not go out this time. They wanted to gather at their mother’s place and volunteered to cook. It would be the last time all of us were together, atleast under positive circumstances.
My sister had been in poor health for several years. She was immunocompromised, and when the world was brought to its knees by The Pandemic, she had to exercise caution. Once upon a time DaLynn had been a person always on the go, but that changed. To say she rarely felt good would be an understatement. We talked & texted almost daily, but didn’t have the opportunity to be together as often the past several years. Having said that, though I valued those infrequent gatherings, I always presumed there’d be many more. If the thought of my “golden years” shuffled fleetingly thru my mind she was there. Of course she’d be there. We’d be texting, talking, and celebrating Christmas in one way or another when we were grey & wrinkly. There are many plans in a man’s heart, right??
Events unfolded rapidly in the new year. DaLynn never felt great, but this was different and she knew it. She went to a doctor and did all the things. She fought it…hard. Eventually though she had to call EMS and be transported to the hospital. Her oxygen was dangerously low. Covid/Pneumonia. The medical team threw everything at the situation they possibly could. My nephews stayed at the hospital night & day. My Dad & I were there as much as possible. She did NOT want to be put on a ventilator, but there simply was no choice. Sadly, all efforts were in vain, and two weeks before her 54th birthday, the five of us were once again together, but it was a much different situation. For the first time in my life I witnessed a person take their final breath. And not just any person. She was the person who knew me best. The person with whom I could share my darkest thoughts, or laugh with about things that only we understood. The person who I could talk to about everything & nothing. The person who knew when I needed understanding & encouragement, or a slap upside the head. The only person other than my parents who knew me my entire life. And now, just a few weeks after that lovely Christmas Day, she was gone.
As the events that typically follow a person’s departure from this realm came & went and the world began to move forward, Dad & the nephews went to DaLynn’s humble abode to gather her belongings. I knew I’d only be in the way and left them to complete the task. They asked me about a few items that I might want, and I did end up taking some stuff, but the only thing I specifically requested was the keychain that had been my father’s Christmas gift. Why?? I don’t really know. Perhaps I thought that seeing her name every day would make me feel close to her. I suppose it is a sort of talisman, although I fully realize it has no magic powers and had no expectations that it’d bring me good fortune. Sometimes an explanation isn’t necessary. Sadly, whether it happened at her apartment or occurred between transporting it from her place to my nephew’s house then eventually into my hands, the keychain suffered water damage. If you’ve observed such misfortune with leather you understand. If you haven’t, I’ll just say that it isn’t pretty.
I am tempted to say that I was devastated, but let’s be honest…the devastation had occurred much earlier in that hospital room. The ruination of the keychain was a spinoff that stirred emotions, like shaking a can of soda. I immediately began researching methods of repair, and probably spent more money on a jar of restorative salve than the keychain originally cost. It helped a little bit, but the engraved name remained barely legible. Not long after that, I found myself driving to The Swap Meet instead of staying in as I had intended. There are many plans in a man’s heart.
That’s when the realization happened. I remembered that there was a Leather Guy at The Swap Meet that sold & engraved such items. Maybe he could help…if he was there. This is the kind of place that might have different vendors each week, and it had been awhile. Thankfully he was there, and I showed him the key chain. As it turns out, one method of repairing water damaged leather is…more water. Who knew?? He also told me that he could fix the lettering…kind of. He didn’t have the exact tool needed, but he could get close. Or…or…he could fix it almost perfectly, depending on how much time I had. Now I would have been willing to stay there all day. Maybe even hang out at this man’s house if that’s what it took. As it turns out, he wanted to know if I could stick around for 45 minutes while he meticulously traced the lettering. Those terms were more than acceptable.
While he was doing the work I wandered around and landed at a table selling peanut butter fudge, engaging in a delightful conversation with the two ladies there. They asked me what Leather Guy was doing for me and I told them the story. It is likely that I overshared (sort of like I am right now), but we had quite the little chat about death and losing loved ones. I certainly didn’t see that coming. I absolutely don’t need to be consuming fudge, but bought some anyway. There are many plans in a man’s heart.
The gentleman sought me out when he was finished, and it was…overwhelming. There are three rooms at The Swap Meet, the last one being the smallest. After paying him far less than he deserved for what he’d just done, I found myself in that third room alone. It wasn’t the first time I had cried. For awhile, gentle weeping or even outright sobbing was a nightly occurrence for me, but I was usually home alone. I don’t fully understand why my sister’s death feels like it hit me harder than Mom’s 20+ years earlier, but I have formed an opinion or two. I had alot more going on back then. I was busier. I was involved in things. There were more distractions. Now, I have too much time to think. Perhaps it isn’t uncommon to be more emotional as we grow older. Or maybe I just understand loss on a deeper level than I did in those days. Sometimes things defy explanation. I didn’t want to be sitting there at an indoor flea market with tears running down my face, but…there are many plans in a man’s heart.
Time does indeed fly, and I can’t quite wrap my head around DaLynn being gone for a full year. Like most people, I have photos. I have old texts that I’ll never erase. Much to my dismay, because we texted so much and I always made myself available to talk when she could, I do not have any voicemails. Believe me, I have searched my phone in futility on multiple occasions, desperate to hear her voice again. And I have the keychain. A meaningless trinket?? For most people, sure. When I look at it though, I am reminded of her. I am able to recall a lifetime of memories. Family gatherings. Silly disagreements & epic fights. Birthday parties, graduations, and church youth events. Sitting around the dinner table, watching the big ol’ TV in our living room, and playing Atari in her room. Washing dishes after supper. Holding my newborn nephews after their arrivals and watching her be a good Mom by being a rather impressive facsimile of the mother that we grieved together. Sharing secrets and talking about things that no one else ever knew. Laughter, tears, and everything in between.
She is gone…physically, and we continue to deal with that daily. A piece of my soul will be missing forever. However, what she left behind remains. Her sons. Those memories. And the keychain. I didn’t think I’d be going out that day, yet…there are many plans in a man’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails.
Not even imaginery awards shows are immune to weather delays, but we’re back!! Thanks for joining us here at the scaled down Sammy Awards. If you have not perused Part 1 please do so now. We’ll be right here anxiously awaiting your return.
Please welcome back our boyishly handsome & funny host…Matt Rife!!
Before we resume handing out awards, we have a real treat for all the honey sauce lovers in The Manoverse. They’ve been entertaining the masses since the 1970’s, but became a viral sensation a few years ago when a movie about their 2010 Reunion Tour was suddenly rediscovered by fans. Here to perform their hit song TastetheBiscuit, please welcome Toasters n’ Moose!!
Wow…what a riveting performance!! That’s a hard act to follow, but our next presenter is willing to try. He’s an actor best remembered for his role as the radio station’s handyman on 90s sitcom NewsRadio, a stand up comedian, and currently hosts one of the most popular podcasts in the world. Give it up for Joe Rogan!!
TheAgonyofDefeatAward ConferenceRealignment
As a lifelong sports fan who LOVES autumn Saturdays filled with hours of glorious college football action, it saddens me to see what the business of bigtime collegiate athletics has done to collegiate sports. There are now four “power” conferences instead of five, and we are consistently told that only two of those really matter. Oklahoma & Texas now play in the Southeastern Conference, while USC & UCLA compete in the Big Ten against midwestern teams like Illinois & Indiana. My West Virginia Mountaineers are in the Big 12 and have to travel to face opponents in Arizona & Utah, because the ACC, where longtime rivals like Pitt & Virginia Tech compete, isn’t interested in the far too small television market the Mountain State offers. The Stanford Cardinal & Cal Golden Bears both landed in the ACC though, where most of their opponents are literally 3000 miles away. And let’s not forget the “lesser” Group of Five conferences, where some really solid programs will never have a realistic opportunity to play for a championship. These moves (along with NIL deals & the transfer portal, which I don’t have the strength to go into) are reminiscent of a narcissistic lover who believes that no matter how abusive they are their partner won’t leave…and sadly, in this case, they aren’t wrong.
Weirdest WaterCoolerTopic Hawk Tuah!!
While out enjoying a night of drunken revelry in Nashville last summer, 21 year old Hailey Welch did a “man on the street” interview that went viral. In response to the question “What’s one move in bed that makes a man go crazy every time?”, Welch replied “You gotta give ’em that ‘hawk tuah’ and spit on that thang”. The video blew up online, and Welch became an Internet sensation. She was able to quit her menial job and ostensibly became quite wealthy selling “Hawk Tuah” merchandise. She appeared on podcasts, got invited onstage at concerts, and threw out the first pitch at a NY Mets game. By September Miss Welch was hosting her own podcast and had cashed in on her bizarre notoriety in a variety of ways, none of them (surprisingly) involving nudity or pornography. We tend to hate such people…folks that gain fame & fortune for no good reason other than being in the right place at the right time while so many others work their asses off to barely make ends meet, but I have to be honest…I’m not even mad at Hailey Welch. She got lucky by saying something funny that caught on, then made bank while she had the chance. She seems like a genuinely decent person (if not particularly intelligent), and the fact is that her 15 minutes of fame will be over soon, if it isn’t already. Hopefully she’s received wise counsel on how to remain financially solvent and goes on to lead a productive life.
FavoriteMovie Twisters
I did not visit my local cineplex hardly at all in 2024, and didn’t get too excited about anything on Netflix or other streaming services. However, I did see Twisters on the big screen and enjoyed it. Billed as a “legacy sequel” to the 1996 disaster classic Twister that starred Bill Paxton, Helen Hunt, Philip Seymour Hoffman, and Ferris Bueller’s best buddy Cameron Frye, the follow up once again features storm chasers & some pretty bitchin’ tornadoes. The cast is charming enough, although I’m not sure there are any future Oscar winners among the group. The plot is entertaining though somewhat predictable, and I feel like there was a lost opportunity to connect the sequel to the original. Early rumors had indicated that the main character would be the daughter of the characters portrayed by Paxton & Hunt, but the writers went in a different direction. They had their reasons, but I think it was a mistake. That connection would have allowed fans of the original film to be more invested in this one, which didn’t quite happen for me. In two decades I have a feeling I will still be watching the 1996 movie instead of Twisters. Having said that, in a weak field it stood out.
BiggestNewsStory Presidential Election
Were there other big stories in 2024?? Of course. However, I feel like the contest to elect the 47th President of the United States dominated the news cycle. Every other big story was affected by the Race for the White House, or the election hovered over those other stories. Former President Donald Trump easily won the Republican nomination, despite multiple frivolous attempts to imprison him. When the lawfare didn’t work he survived two assassination attempts that only increased his popularity. Meanwhile, current President Joe Biden was thrown under the bus when his leftist friends realized that they weren’t pulling the wool over as many eyes as they thought by pretending that Biden has actually been in charge of anything the past few years. The man clearly suffers diminished mental capacity and has been the figurehead of a puppet regime. When faced with the reality that Biden wasn’t up to the task of continuing the ruse, Democrats decided that Plan B was…Vice President Kamala Harris 😂. On the surface one can understand the logic…an opportunity to elect the first female U.S. President, and a “woman of color” to boot!! Exactly the kind of identity politics that leftists embrace. The problem?? Kamala Harris is a moron. She is a terrible political candidate that allegedly did some rather nasty things to climb the ladder. She is not likeable in any way, and her inane rambling is almost worse than Biden. Harris is the most lethal kind of idiot…one who somehow believes they aren’t dumb as a box of rocks. The Democrats compounded their error by choosing soy boy Governor Tim Walz of Minnesota as Harris’ running mate. He & his wife have got to be mental patients that escaped from an institution. Conversely, Trump chose Senator JD Vance from Ohio, a former Marine whose story was chronicled in the best selling 2016 memoir HillbillyElegy, which was adapted into a 2020 film. Vance is eloquent & thoughtful, but not a pushover like former Vice President Mike Pence. The legacy media did their damndest to run cover for the Harris-Walz ticket, but at the end of the day America simply wasn’t buying what they were selling. Most Americans are tired of elitists preaching about climate change, pronouns, racial equity, and safe spaces while laundering billions of dollars thru Ukraine and allowing our country to be flooded with unvetted illegals that pose a grave danger to way too many. People actually trust Donald Trump, as flawed as he may be, to put the economic well being of the United States first and focus on real issues instead of wasting time, money, & effort on meaningless poppycock. If they were smart Democrats would do some self-reflection, asking themselves why the majority of the country has now chosen Trump, who even Republicans will admit is nuttier than a damn fruitcake (and I mean that in the kindest possible way), three times (let’s be honest…we all know what really happened in 2020) instead of their flawed policies. That won’t happen though. Let us look forward with hope, encouragement, and faith that our nation will be stronger in the coming months, resulting in a safer, more affordable standard of living for all of us.
Hall of Fame basketball player (West Virginia Mountaineers, Los Angeles Lakers), executive (Los Angeles Lakers, Memphis Grizzlies, Golden St. Warriors), and NBA Logo Jerry West…Hollywood icon James Earl Jones (StarWars, FieldofDreams, ComingtoAmerica, TheSandlot, TheLionKing, TheBigBangTheory)…humanitarian, Nobel Peace Prize winner, and former U.S. President Jimmy Carter…fitness guru Richard Simmons…Grammy award winning producer & composer Quincy Jones…MLB Hall of Fame outfielder Willie Mays (New York Giants), infielders Rickey Henderson (Oakland A’s) & Orlando Cepeda (San Francisco Giants), and All Time Hits Leader Pete Rose (Cincinnati Reds)…legendary comedian & actor Bob Newhart (The Bob Newhart Show, Newhart, The Big BangTheory)…sex therapist & Holocaust survivor Dr. Ruth Westheimer…Grammy & Golden Globe award winning singer, songwriter, & actor Kris Kristofferson…ESPN reporter Chris Mortensen and personalities Howie Schwab & TJ Simers, and sportscaster Greg Gumbel…legendary talk show host Phil Donahue…actors Carl Weathers (Rocky, HappyGilmore), Richard Lewis (AnythingbutLove, RobinHood: MeninTights), David Soul (Starsky & Hutch), James B. Sikking (HillStreetBlues, DoogieHowserM.D.), Adan Canto (DesignatedSurvivor), Christian Oliver (SavedbytheBell: TheNewClass), Don Murray (KnotsLanding), M. Emmet Walsh (Fletch, ChristmaswiththeKranks), Dabney Coleman (9to5, WarGames, You’veGotMail), Joe Flaherty (SCTV), Johnny Wactor (GeneralHospital), Bernard Hill (Titanic, LordoftheRings), Tony LoBianco (TheFrenchConnection), Benji Gregory (ALF), Martin Mull (Mr. Mom, Mrs. Doubtfire), Doug Sheehan (GeneralHospital, KnotsLanding, DayByDay), John Amos (Roots, GoodTimes, ComingtoAmerica, DieHard2, TheWestWing), Charles Cyphers (Halloween, MajorLeague), John Aprea (TheGodfatherPart2, AnotherWorld, FullHouse), Ron Hale (Ryan’sHope, General Hospital), James Darren (TJHooker), Chad McQueen (TheKarateKid), Nicholas Pryer (RiskyBusiness), Drake Hogestyn (DaysofOurLives), Alan Rachins (L.A. Law, Dharma&Greg), Scott L. Schwartz (The Ocean’s Trilogy), Wayne Northrup (DaysofOurLives), and Thom Christopher (OneLifetoLive)…NBA legend Bill Walton (Boston Celtics)…NASA astronaut Jon McBride…game show hosts Chuck Woolery (WheelofFortune) & Peter Marshall (HollywoodSquares)…Oscar winning producers Albert Ruddy (TheGodfather) & Jon Landau (Titanic), directors Jim Abrahams (Airplane!, TheNakedGun), Charles Shyer (FatheroftheBride), & Norman Jewison (Moonstruck), television producer E. Duke Vincent (Dynasty, MelrosePlace, 7thHeaven, BeverlyHills90210), and casting director Dianne Crittenden (StarWars, HoneysuckleRose, PrettyWoman)…chocolate chip cookie guru Wally “Famous” Amos…pro wrestlers Ole Anderson, Ice Train, Virgil, Paul “Butcher” Vachon, Wild Samoans Afa & Sika Anoa’i, Kevin Sullivan, “Psycho” Sid Vicious, and Jax Dane…singers/musicians Toby Keith, David Sanborn, Steve Lawrence, Eric Carmen, Clarence “Frogman” Henry, Dickie Betts (The Allman Brothers), Mandisa Hundley, Mike Pinder (The Moody Blues), Dave Loggins, Joe Bonsall (The Oak Ridge Boys), Sergio Mendes, Scott Simon (Sha Na Na), Tito Jackson (The Jackson Five), Cissy Houston, Liam Payne (One Direction), and Jack Jones…French TV host Bernard Pivot…football players Andy Russell (Pittsburgh Steelers), Mercury Morris (Miami Dolphins), Vontae Davis (Indianapolis Colts), Roman Gabriel, Jim Otto (Oakland Raiders), Larry Allen (Dallas Cowboys), Jacoby Jones (Baltimore Ravens), Khyree Jackson (Minnesota Vikings), Duane Thomas (Dallas Cowboys), Greg Landry (Baltimore Colts), coaches Joe Collier (Denver Broncos), Monte Kiffin (Tampa Bay Buccaneers), John Robinson (Los Angeles Rams, USC Trojans), & Gerry Faust (Notre Dame Fighting Irish & Akron Zips), and team executive Bill Tobin (Chicago Bears)…newscasters Charles Osgood, Robert MacNeil, Lou Dobbs, Tom Jarriel, and Aaron Brown…Pop-Tarts inventor William Post…golfer & broadcaster Peter Oosterhuis and PGA golfer Grayson Murray…infamous actor, Ford Bronco enthusiast, and alleged murderer OJ Simpson…Pulitzer Prize winning TV critic Tom Shales…former NFL referee Jim Tunney…actresses Shannen Doherty (BeverlyHills90210), Teri Garr (YoungFrankenstein, Mr. Mom), Shelley Duvall (TheShining, Popeye), Dame Maggie Smith (HarryPotter, Hook, SisterAct), Glynis Johns (MaryPoppins, TheRef), Joyce Randolph (TheHoneymooners), Chita Rivera (WestSideStory), Ann Whitfield (WhiteChristmas), Marla Adams (The Young&TheRestless), Susan Buckner (Grease), Gena Rowlands (HopeFloats, TheNotebook), and Linda Lavin (Alice)…MLB players Fernando Valenzuela (Los Angeles Dodgers), Ed Ott (Pittsburgh Pirates), Jose DeLeon (Pittsburgh Pirates), Luis Tiant(Cleveland Indians, Boston Red Sox), U.L. Washington (Kansas City Royals), and managers Jimy Williams (Boston Red Sox, Toronto Blue Jays) & Whitey Herzog (St. Louis Cardinals)…former U.S. Senator (Connecticut) & Vice Presidential candidate Joseph Lieberman, former Florida Governor Bob Graham, former Arkansas Governor, Congressman, & Senator David Pryor, U.S. Senator Sheila Jackson Lee (Texas)…travel writer Arthur Frommer…basketball players Dikembe Mutombo (Denver Nuggets, Atlanta Hawks, Houston Rockets), Robert Reid (Houston Rockets), coaches Lefty Driesell (Maryland Terrapins) & Lou Carnesecca (St. John’s Redmen), and NBA executive Pat Williams (Orlando Magic)…notorious Wall St. trader Ivan Boesky…Apollo 8 astronaut William Anders…1963 Indianapolis 500 winner Parnelli Jones & three time Daytona 500 winner Bobby Allison…songwriters Mark James (AlwaysonMyMind, HookedonaFeeling, SuspiciousMinds), Will Jennings (Up Where We Belong, HigherLove, TearsinHeaven, My Heart Will Go On), and JD Souther (Best of My Love, HeartacheTonight, New Kid in Town)…Judith Belushi-Pisano (widow of John Belushi)…documentary filmmaker Morgan Spurlock (SuperSizeMe)…famous gymnastics coach Bela Karolyi…Ethel Kennedy (widow of Robert F. Kennedy)
The Academy Awards were first presented in 1929. The ceremony was held at a hotel, with 270 people attending. The presentations lasted fifteen minutes. Obviously that is a far cry from the modern televised spectacle attended by a few thousand people and viewed on television by millions. For various reasons that you don’t need to know or understand The Sammy Awards will be using this information as inspiration to scale back our presentation. It is likely that we will get back to our full scale tomfoolery next year, but at this moment in time we humbly extend sincerest gratitude for tuning in to our imaginary awards show, a labor of love dating back more that a decade & a half. This is our way to honor, mock, cope with, and say a thankful farewell to the last year. In the past we’ve had delusions of grandeur, imagining the imaginery, if real, might be televised on HBO or TBS, or perhaps streamed on Netflix or Amazon Video. This year might be more of a Tubi or Crackle kind of show.
At any rate, because we love irony, The Sammy Awards is proud to introduce a comedian well known for his crowd work to host our awards show with no crowd. Please give a warm welcome to Matt Rife!!
After some insightful commentary from Mr. Rife it is time for our first presenter. Actually he will be presenting several awards. We had a really great lineup of guests, but life happens and availability became an issue. Ben Affleck & Jennifer Lopez were suppose to present together, but circumstances changed. Ellen Degeneres didn’t leave a forwarding address. P. Diddy declined to join us but offered to host an after party. Justin Timberlake really wanted to participate but couldn’t find a designated driver. Former Governor Rudy Giuliani is meeting with his financial adviser. President Biden is on vacation, gearing up for one final round of treasonous money laundering in Ukraine before he leaves office…physically…in a couple of weeks (he checked out mentally a long time ago). Nick Cannon is still celebrating multiple Christmases with his children. We could’ve had an EPIC program, but we’ll soldier on and do the best we can, which includes one of the best kickers in the NFL. He is no stranger to giving life affirming speeches, and is eager to share his wisdom, particularly with the ladies of The Manoverse. His team just finished their regular season, and we appreciate him squeezing us in before the playoffs begin. Please give a warm welcome to Kansas City Chiefs All Pro Harrison Butker!!
The Thrill of Victory Award Nick Saban & Bill Belichick
After a coaching career that spanned a half century and led to seven National Championships, Nick Saban walked away from the Alabama Crimson Tide last January, citing the new reality of college football…NIL, realignment, etc….as a valid reason for just being tired of all the BS. While The Tide predictably regressed a bit under new leadership, Saban found a new home on ESPN’s CollegeGameday and is better at the whole TV thing than most would’ve predicted. Meanwhile, after winning six Super Bowls in 17 years with the New England Patriots…often with questionable ethics…Bill Belichick realized, along with the rest of us, that most of the credit belonged to QB Tom Brady (and cheating of course), who went on to win a Super Bowl without Belichick in Tampa Bay while his wife was being planked by her personal trainer. Belichick’s Patriots were 29-38 after Brady bolted, so the coach departed New England last January. Shockingly enough he was not hired by an NFL team, which provided him the opportunity to boink a gal young enough to be his granddaughter. The North Carolina Tar Heels were so impressed by Belichick’s skill in recruiting college kids that they’ve hired him to be their coach.
FavoriteTelevisionShow GeneralHospital
I don’t watch much television anymore, which is odd considering the quantity of content is greater than it’s ever been. I won’t even criticize a dearth of quality programming, because I am quite certain there are a bunch of great shows that I am missing out on. The truth though, is that outside of wrasslin’, ball games, and my stories, the dramas & sitcoms available just don’t interest me to the point of even investing time to check them out. And with streaming, more often than not I’d rather watch an old favorite that I’ve seen dozens of times. That being said, GeneralHospital is my old reliable. I’ve been watching since grade school, which is longer than I care to ponder. 2024 was a bit different, because GH was always an experience I shared with my sister. I’ve missed our phone calls & texts kvetching about all the latest drama in the fictional town of Port Charles. I realize soap operas are kind of silly, but so are alot of other things. I learned many years ago not to take stuff too seriously most of the time, so entertainment really boils down to what tickles your funny bone, engages your imagination, or helps you escape the challenges of real life. Since the early 80’s GeneralHospital has done those things for me.
Favorite Sportscaster Scott Van Pelt
ESPN isn’t what it used to be, and I’ve grown weary of the debate shows that I used to enjoy. However, the reality is that “The Worldwide Leader” in Bristol, CT remains the driving force in televised sporting events. While I don’t mind tuning into a game on ESPN, I mostly avoid their other programming…except for SVP. If Sportscenter is coming on and he is hosting, I’ll stick around. Van Pelt is versatile, as I also enjoy when he’s part of the broadcast team for golf. He is fun & flippant, but also possesses the journalistic chops to ask tough questions and offer gravitas when a situation demands it. He strikes me as fairminded, not cheerleading or being overly critical of any specific teams, players, or coaches. I respect anyone who is funny, fair, and excellent at their job.
FavoritePodcast State of Mind
My goal of becoming a podcast kind of guy hasn’t come to fruition just yet. I don’t have the attention span I used to, and find the plethora of intriguing choices a bit overwhelming. What usually happens is I’ll hear about a particular podcast or perhaps see a snippet of it on social media and think “That seems cool…I need to check it out.”, then I simply don’t. Perhaps I can do better in 2025, but let’s not get too excited. Anyway, of the podcasts that I’ve given more than cursory attention to, State of Mind, hosted by Maurice Benard, rises above the noise. Benard is an actor best known for portraying mob boss Sonny Corinthos on GeneralHospital. He has not been shy about his very real issues with bipolar disorder, and for the past few years has invited guests onto the pod to open up about their own struggles with mental health. It’s one of those topics that alot of folks, whether it be an old school Baby Boomer, strong & silent type of guy, or a youngster who thinks they’re way too cool, avoid dealing with or admitting to, even to themselves. StateofMind illustrates that mental illness does exist, it needs to be dealt with, and it’s okay to talk about it.
FavoriteApp Spades *
I jumped back onto the Spades bandwagon in 2024, just with a different app than I was using a few years ago. I probably waste too much time on such activities when I should be doing something productive, but sometimes one simply needs a mindless distraction from all the noise.
Favorite Foodie Mr. Food
Okay, so first things first…it’s not actually Mr. Food. The OG Mr. Food was Art Ginsburg, who I vaguely recall hosting brief cooking segments during the news when I was a kid. Ginsburg sadly passed in 2012, but his legacy continues with Howard Rosenthal, who worked with Ginsburg for many years. Rosenthal introduces himself as “Howard, from the Mr. Food Test Kitchen”. Of course things are a little different these days, because if one misses whatever show the segments air on in your local television market you always have the option of finding the latest recipes online. I’ve actually made a few things I saw on Mr. Food, and if I may paraphrase his beloved tagline…oooh, they were pretty good. Mr. Food was actually way ahead of the curve, because these days who has the time or inclination to invest in a 30-60 minute cooking show presented by a high end chef who prepares dishes we common folk cannot successfully duplicate?? I’d rather watch Howard’s two minute presentation that still looks rather tasty and feel good about trying it in my kitchen.
This seems like a good time to take a brief timeout. Stay tuned for the exciting conclusion of the downsized yet still delightful Sammy Awards!!
We’re doing a very quick turnaround because college football’s semifinals begin tonight. I am a little disappointed that so much of the NFL playoff picture was cleared up this past weekend, because I had visions of total chaos that’d push us into considering a few more games. Unfortunately it wasn’t meant to be. The good news is that we both went 4-1, which means that finishing above .500 for the season is within reach. With the college playoff expanding to 12 teams and the way the schedule falls, we will not be picking the semis or the championship game, which is probably for the best. As always I would like to thank my nephew Zach for indulging me with this fun little gig every football season, and give a shout out to anyone who might actually read what is written here. I have not been as productive in 2024 as I could’ve been, and I realize that citizens of The Manoverse who aren’t football fans probably gave up on me months ago. I’ll try to do better in 2025. Happy New Year everyone, and may God bless you as we all get the opportunity to begin again.
My Season: 53-56
Zach’s Season: 52-57
Fiesta Bowl
CFP Quarterfinal
Penn State (-10.5) vs. Boise State
The Nittany Lions easily defeated SMU in the first round, while the Broncos had a bye. That system of seeding & byes seems flawed given the fact that Penn St. is a double digit favorite. There will be much hand wringing & consternation in the offseason by folks who essentially believe that only two conferences and maybe a half dozen other teams really matter, which is just more proof that collegiate athletics is broken. As far as this particular contest goes, despite the fact that I’ve accused Penn St. of being overrated on multiple occasions, and I am almost always rooting for the underdog, the fact is that Penn St. will likely win. The question is, can they bitch slap Boise like a few teams got beat down in Round 1?? Boise St.’s only loss was in September at Oregon by three points, so I have to believe that they can stay within ten points of Penn St. Zach thinks that there is a legit chance that Penn St.’s defense has problems stopping Heisman runner-up RB Ashton Jeanty, and doesn’t have much faith in the Nittany Lions coming thru in big games. He agrees that Boise is unlikely to win, but won’t go away quietly.
My Pick: Boise St.
Zach’s Pick: Boise St.
Peach Bowl
CFP Quarterfinal
Texas (-12.5) vs. Arizona State
It might be the most entertaining game of the entire tournament. Texas handled Clemson in the first round, while Arizona St. had a bye. In three previous Pac 12 seasons the Sun Devils were 14-23. Head coach Kenny Dillingham, in his second season after serving as offensive coordinator at Auburn, Florida St., & Oregon, has led a complete turnaround in the program’s inaugural Big 12 campaign. Look, I know that Texas has two QBs and probably a bunch of other players that’ll play in the NFL soon enough. I understand that the only two losses they suffered in their first year in the SEC were to Georgia, winner of two of the past three national championships. I get it. Have you watched Arizona St. play though?? They bulldozed Iowa St. in the Big 12 title game, and their only two losses were by a combined 18 points. Would I love to see a huge upset?? Damn straight. Do I think it will happen?? I’m not holding my breath. However, I do believe it’ll be a much closer game than the “experts” predict. At the beginning of the playoff Zach predicted Arizona St. could make a run and be a serious title contender, so he’s not moving off that now.
My Pick: Arizona St.
Zach’s Pick: Arizona St.
Rose Bowl
CFP Quarterfinal
Ohio State (-2.5) vs. Oregon
I suppose this should be considered the marquee matchup of the four. Both teams have spent time at #1 this season. The Buckeyes only two losses were to Oregon & arch rival Michigan, and the folks in Columbus were so upset about the latter that some wanted head coach Ryan Day canned. People need to get with the times though. National Championships are no longer mythical. The system is flawed, but there is a system, which means that Ohio St.’s loss to Michigan should be considered less impactful than it might’ve been a decade ago. Sure, they missed out on a conference title and a first round bye, but they are here. They beat the snot out of Tennessee in Round 1 and now everything is in front of them. Meanwhile, in their first Big Ten season the Ducks ran roughshod thru a tough schedule, including a one point October victory over Ohio St., which came down to a field goal in the final two minutes. It is quite instructive that Oregon is considered the underdog. If there is one thing I have tried to learn while doing these picks, it is that oddsmakers know things we don’t, and oftentimes they have an uncanny way of being almost exactly right. So look for the favorites to win by a field goal. Surprisingly, Zach concurs.
My Pick: Ohio St.
Zach’s Pick: Ohio St.
Sugar Bowl
CFP Quarterfinal
Notre Dame vs. Georgia (-1.5)
Has Notre Dame been overrated?? Sure, they’re 12-1, but the most impressive wins on their resume are the season opener at Texas A&M and a home victory over Louisville. Their Round 1 domination of Indiana has been much discussed, and if you believe the Hoosiers didn’t belong in the playoff (I’m looking at you SEC sycophants) then you can’t give much credence to the Irish winning that game. Conversely, even though Georgia hasn’t been as elite as we’ve been used to the past few seasons, no one questions their seat at the table. However, with QB Carson Beck out with an elbow injury, the intrigue for this contest is turned up a notch or two. I assume Georgia would be a much bigger favorite with Beck, but the fact that they’re still favored at all either shows how much respect the Bulldogs have earned thru the years, or casts a shadow on Notre Dame’s contender status. Perhaps both. The game is being played in Atlanta, which is basically a home field for the favorites. I think we’ll see a low scoring defensive struggle, probably decided by a few special teams plays. In that scenario I believe Georgia finds a way to escape with a close win. Zach agrees.
My Pick: Georgia
Zach’s Pick: Georgia
Carolina at Atlanta (-7.5)
In my season preview I predicted that winning the NFC South would be a tough grind, because that’s exactly what it has been in recent years. So here we are. The Falcons have to win, and even then may fall short of the postseason. I am a bit surprised that they benched QB Kirk Cousins in favor of rookie Michael Penix Jr. A bold move for sure in a tight playoff race, but whether it is wise or not remains to be seen. The Panthers have been as hapless as I knew they would be, but teams with nothing to lose and an opportunity to play spoiler can be dangerous. I don’t believe the outcome is in much doubt, but Carolina will put up a fight. Still, I look for Atlanta to cover…barely. Zach concurs.
My Pick: Atlanta
Zach’s Pick: Atlanta
Kansas City at Denver (-10)
I know why the Broncos are favored, but it’s still a bit surprising. Having already locked up the division title and the AFC’s first round bye, the assumption is that KC will sit most of their starters. Meanwhile, the Broncos not only have the home field, but find themselves in a three team dogfight for a wildcard berth. One team will be super motivated, while the other has much bigger goals in mind. I think Denver will get the job done, but even playing with backups I can’t fathom the Chiefs going down by ten points. Zach agrees.
My Pick: Kansas City
Zach’s Pick: Kansas City
New Orleans at Tampa Bay (-13)
The Saints just haven’t been a good team this season and probably need to consider a total rebuild. Conversely, my assessment of Baker Mayfield was inaccurate, to put it kindly. The Bucs aren’t amongst the best in the conference, but they are scrappy and could catch a playoff opponent off guard. They need to win this game to even get there, but damn…the points are a bit much. When these teams met in The Big Easy in mid-October Tampa opened up a can o’ whoopass and won by 24 points, but I think it’ll be more like 10-12 this time. Zach concurs.
My Pick: New Orleans
Zach’s Pick: New Orleans
Minnesota at Detroit (-2.5)
Both teams come into the game 14-2. The winner will be crowned NFC North champs and be the top seed in that conference, earning a first round bye. The loser will drop all the way back to the #5 seed. It’s the final game of the regular season, broadcast on NBC on Sunday night. I suggest muting your television and finding the radio call. IYKYK. When these teams met in October the Lions kicked the game winning field goal with 15 seconds on the clock. Since then Detroit’s defense has been decimated by injuries, to the point that I don’t believe they can still be considered Super Bowl favorites. If I were a die hard Lions fan, head coach Dan Campbell would drive me insane. Call me old fashioned, but while his aggressiveness is entertaining, it isn’t always wise. I think he’ll do something stupid…fake punt, unnecessarily going for a two point conversion, going for it on 4th down once too often…and it’ll cost his team a division title. Vikings QB Sam Darnold gets Zach’s vote for Comeback Player of the Year, and believes the smart choice is to ride with their momentum.
First of all, F*^K YOU NFL. As silly as it may seem, last weekend, when RedZone host Scott Hanson changed his familiar catchphrase “seven hours of commercial free football” because they’re now running a few commercials during the broadcast, it upset me to the point that I was ready to drop out of every fantasy league I’m in and stop doing these picks in the future. Perhaps I have a screw loose. Or maybe the holiday season, which isn’t as merry & bright in my world as it once was, had me all up in my feelings. Thankfully I chilled out enough that my Steelers getting trucked by the Chiefs on Christmas Day barely raised my blood pressure. I still don’t know how I will proceed with RedZone, which I’ve loved for several years. The NFL has tested my patience for awhile with their “social justice” initiatives and watering down the game under the guise of “safety”, but RedZone felt like the last bastion for pure enjoyment of the sport. Now, a corporation that makes BILLIONS of dollars in profits is tainting that innocence for a few more ad dollars that won’t make or break them. It’s sick. Perhaps they’ll change their mind, but I won’t hold my breath. At any rate, Zach (3-2) bested me (1-4) once again to draw within one game of a tie for the season, which still doesn’t upset me as much as the whole RedZone situation.
My Season: 49-55
Zach’s Season: 48-56
Denver at Cincinnati (-3)
Both teams are still fighting for a playoff berth, but the 7-8 Bengals need some help. Obviously that starts with winning this game. Conversely, the 9-6 Broncos will be in with a victory. I really had both of these teams pegged wrong, believing that Cincinnati would bounce back from last season and be a factor in the AFC North, while Denver would secure a Top 5 draft pick. The opposite has occurred with both teams. Having said that, I think the home team wins on their turf and hangs on to a thread of hope for the postseason. Zach appreciates what the Broncos have accomplished with rookie QB Bo Nix, but feels they are an unfinished product with some work to do. He doesn’t like the Bengals defense at all, but gives the nod to Cincy & QB Joe Burrow in a shootout.
My Pick: Cincinnati
Zach’s Pick: Cincinnati
Green Bay at Minnesota (-1.5)
It might be the best game of the weekend. Both teams will make the playoffs, but the 13-2 Vikings can still claim a division title and maybe even a first round bye if things go their way. In their previous meeting way back in September Minnesota got a close win on the road, so I expect things to balance out with the 11-4 Packers returning the favor. Zach concurs.
My Pick: Green Bay
Zach’s Pick: Green Bay
Miami (-6.5) at Cleveland
I expected the Dolphins to challenge for a division title, but at 7-8 they’re just fighting to finish with a winning record. No one should be surprised by the futility of the 3-12 Browns, who are even worse than I expected and have dropped off significantly from last year’s mirage of success. The home field doesn’t even matter. It’ll probably be a yawn inducing slugfest, but I believe the visiting favorites will win comfortably. Zach agrees.
My Pick: Miami
Zach’s Pick: Miami
Atlanta at Washington (-4)
Don’t sleep on this game featuring two of the first eight selections in this past spring’s draft (and 2 of the top 4 quarterbacks). Jayden Daniels has been a revelation for the 10-5 Commanders, who are battling the Seattle Seahawks for the NFC’s third wildcard, while Michael Penix Jr. was just inserted into the lineup a week ago to boost the 8-7 Falcons to the NFC South crown, which is the only way Atlanta or the Tampa Bay Buccaneers will qualify for the playoffs. Penix might indeed be the answer in Atlanta, but we don’t really have much data yet, whereas I’ve seen enough to know how great Daniels & the Commanders can be. Zach concurs.
My Pick: Washington
Zach’s Pick: Washington
Detroit (-3.5) at San Francisco
One team has lived up to the hype, while the other has had their season torpedoed by misfortune. At 13-2 the Lions are safely in the postseason field, but they need to win to secure the division title & a first round bye. The 6-9 Niners have been a huge disappointment and will need to confront some tough issues in the offseason. A few months ago I would’ve assumed this to be one of the marquee Monday night games of the entire season, but now it just feels like an afterthought. The outcome of Green Bay-Minnesota could alter Detroit’s approach to the game, but either way I believe they will prevail. Zach agrees.
With the dawn of a new era in college football we’ve decided to forego our traditional Bowl-a-Palooza and incorporate the playoff games into our normal routine. Let’s face it…most of the bowl games have been superfluous for awhile now, and with interim coaches & transfer portal madness it has become nearly impossible to predict them with any degree of legit knowledge. By all means, if ESPN is airing the Cereal Bowl featuring East State vs. Big City Tech at 4pm on a Tuesday afternoon please enjoy it. Sometimes those random matchups are rather delightful. For our purposes here though, we’ll stick with games that have some degree of importance. I must reluctantly admit that last week (1-4) was abysmal for me, which means that I have finally fallen below .500 for the season, while Zach (3-2) has closed the gap to within three games. Buckle up…it’s going to be a wild stretch run.
My Season: 48-51
Zach’s Season: 45-54
Indiana at Notre Dame (-7.5)
Somehow the rankings happened to fall into place just right, making this intra-state battle possible. Funny how that worked out. At any rate, opinions vary on the 11-1 Hoosiers, especially after they were beaten by three TDs in Columbus a few weeks ago. Should they be here instead of Alabama?? I believe that results matter, and teams can only play the opponents on their schedule. The Hoosiers did that and only lost once, so I think they earned their spot. Meanwhile, the 11-1 Fighting Irish probably have a nearly guaranteed playoff berth anytime they win 9+ games, despite not being a member of any conference. Look…any football fan with actual insight into the game will admit that if these teams met a hundred times Notre Dame would win 80% of the time. Having said that, my Marshall Thundering Herd traveled to South Bend and upset Notre Dame a couple of years ago, so anything is possible. This is a Friday night kickoff, and I know the nephews & I will be hurrying home after our family Christmas dinner to watch. I’d be pleasantly surprised by an upset, but wouldn’t bet money on that happening. However, I feel like Indiana is being overlooked & disrespected just a bit. They’ll keep it close. Zach, however, points out that Notre Dame just signed head coach Marcus Freeman to a contract extension, and on the field they’ve crushed every opponent since an inexplicable early season loss to Northern Illinois. He sees Indiana as talented & well coached, but doesn’t feel like they have what it takes to keep pace in this game.
My Pick: Indiana
Zach’s Pick: Notre Dame
SMU at Penn State (-8.5)
Much of what I said about the previous matchup applies to this game as well. The 11-2 Mustangs aren’t receiving much love. A year ago they were playing in the AAC, and now they play in the ACC, which is probably the weakest of the Power 4. If they’d been blown out in the conference title game by Clemson it is likely that Alabama would’ve been handed this spot, but SMU played a hell of a 4th quarter and nearly pulled off a big comeback. Conversely, Penn St.’s playoff berth was never in question, despite losing the Big Ten Championship to Oregon. The 11-2 Nittany Lions are probably a little overrated, but they’ve mowed thru most of their schedule with tremendous success, which cannot be denied. Not to be repetitive, but once again…if these teams played one another a hundred times the home favorites would almost certainly win 80% of those games, but anything can happen in this one instance. I think SMU will be more than competitive for three quarters, but end up losing…by a touchdown. Conversely, Zach isn’t sure SMU belongs here and foresees a comfortable win by the home favorites.
My Pick: SMU
Zach’s Pick: Penn St.
Clemson at Texas (-11.5)
I am somewhat surprised by the points. Sure, the 11-2 Longhorns quickly acclimated to the SEC and were only defeated by Georgia (twice). It is also true that the 10-3 Tigers aren’t as elite as they were while appearing in six consecutive (four team) CFPs and winning national championships in two of those years. However, a double digit spread feels disrespectful. Texas will probably win, but it won’t be by more than ten points. Zach is a big Dabo Swinney fan and agrees that Clemson will be more competitive than the “experts” believe.
My Pick: Clemson
Zach’s Pick: Clemson
Tennessee at Ohio State (-7.5)
Are people overlooking this game?? It’s an 8/9 matchup, so by definition it is expected to be the most competitive in the first round. The 10-2 Buckeyes were considered to be amongst the top teams in the country until being upset by Michigan a few weeks ago, and it seems like that forced everyone to view Ohio St. thru a whole new prism. Meanwhile, the 10-2 Volunteers can look back at a mid-October upset of Alabama as a huge reason why they’re here now. However, that’s all they really have to hang their hat on. Otherwise the schedule was rather prosaic. Georgia beat Tennessee by two touchdowns, and I think that’s the level Ohio St. is on. I’d love to be wrong. Rockytop brings alot of energy to the table. At the end of the day though, I believe the home team gets it done by ten points. To my utter shock & amazement Zach agrees that the Buckeyes are likely unhappy about how they’ve been talked about recently and will use that as motivation to win easily.
My Pick: Ohio St.
Zach’s Pick: Ohio St.
Philadelphia (-3) at Washington
Our only NFL game this week is an NFC East battle, although the division title has been pretty much decided. The 12-2 Eagles have won ten straight and will win the division, but they have their eyes on the NFC’s top seed & first round bye. The 9-5 Commanders are in the driver’s seat for a wildcard berth, but are far from a lock. I really like rookie QB Jayden Daniels and can see big things for him in the future if the front office continues to build a great team. However, sometimes one just has to be patient and wait for your turn, and it’s not Washington’s time right now. Philly is playing on a different level, and anything short of the Super Bowl will be a disappointment. RB Saquon Barkley may be the best free agent acquisition of the past decade, recapturing the magic that made him a 2017 Heisman finalist at Penn St. and reinvigorating a career that stalled over six seasons with the NY Giants. When these teams met in Philadelphia last month the Eagles won by 12, and I expect something similar now. Zach concurs.
College football’s conference championships were a bit kinder to Zach (5-4) than me (3-6), meaning that I have fallen to .500 for the season. Can I keep my head above water, or will Zach continue to cut into my lead?? We’re riding with the NFL this week, as division races and playoff battles begin to come into focus down the stretch.
My Season: 47-47
Zach’s Season: 42-52
Miami at Houston (-3)
The 8-5 Texans seem to have the AFC South well in hand, with a two game lead and four games remaining. However, we never know who might get hot at the right time or which teams could implode. The 6-7 Dolphins aren’t winning the AFC East, but remain mathematically in the wild card chase. Every game is a must win for them. Miami is playing better in the back half of the schedule, while Houston was more effective early on, so I’m leaning toward a mild upset. Zach understands the momentum factor, but simply feels as though Houston is the better team.
My Pick: Miami
Zach’s Pick: Houston
Buffalo at Detroit (-1.5)
The 10-3 Bills will win their division, but still have work to do to earn a first round bye, which is possible if they keep winning and the KC Chiefs falter a bit. Meanwhile, the 12-1 Lions are in the driver’s seat for the NFC’s first round bye, but the Philadelphia Eagles are hot on their heels. This very well could be a Super Bowl preview. I think the home field is huge, because if Detroit had to visit ice cold & snowy Buffalo the outcome wouldn’t be in much doubt. However, in the cozy confines of domed Ford Field I like the Lions to come out on top. Zach concurs.
My Pick: Detroit
Zach’s Pick: Detroit
Tampa Bay at LA Chargers (-3)
Credit where it is due…QB Baker Mayfield is finally living up to the hype that accompanied him winning the 2017 Heisman Trophy and being the #1 overall pick in the 2018 NFL Draft. He has the 7-6 Bucs atop the NFC South, although let’s be honest…they are a level below the top 2 or 3 teams in the conference. A step below is also where the 8-5 Chargers find themselves, although I assume most everyone connected to the organization is happy to be in that spot. They have a firm grasp on a wildcard berth, but also need to keep on winning. This might be one of the best battles of the weekend, and my money is on the home team getting the job done. Zach is all in on head coach Jim Harbaugh.
My Pick: LA Chargers
Zach’s Pick: LA Chargers
Indianapolis at Denver (-4)
The 8-5 Broncos are one of the most surprising stories in the league, atleast for me. Rookie QB Bo Nix has exceeded all expectations and has his team poised to claim a wildcard spot. Conversely, the 6-7 Colts have been a model of inconsistency. Injuries have been part of that equation, but frankly it just seems like they are a team in flux, hoping for the pieces to fall into place someday. Obviously that could happen, especially if QB Anthony Richardson eventually fulfill’s his potential. As for this game, I foresee the underdogs putting up a hell of a fight, but the home team is likely to win rather easily. Zach agrees.
My Pick: Denver
Zach’s Pick: Denver
Green Bay (-3) at Seattle
The Sunday night games have been hit or miss this season, and especially this time of year, after enjoying RedZone all day, I am inclined to watch an old Christmas movie rather than more football. However, I’ll probably be watching this game. Packers’ QB Jordan Love is a great example of someone raising the bar and fulfilling expectations in his fifth year in the league. Having said that, even at 9-4, Green Bay is in third place in their division. They’ll need to stay on their toes to secure a playoff berth. The same goes for the 8-5 Seahawks, who are in a dogfight for the NFC West crown. Will they win the division?? Earn a wild card?? Miss the playoffs altogether?? With one of the most significant home field advantages in the NFL I believe Seattle will remain on the positive side of that discussion for now. Conversely, Zach really likes Love to lead his team to a solid victory.
The Manofesto 