The Manofesto

(Originally published 12/19/2007)

Back in 1988 The Godfather of Talk Radio, Rush Limbaugh, published his 35 Undeniable Truths of Life. A few years later he did a revised list since many of the originals had to do with communism, The Soviet Union, & other outdated concepts. Now, here, in the Year of Our Lord 2007, The Godfather of Cyberspace humbly presents my own list of The 35 Undeniable Truths of Life:

1. Jesus said “Most assuredly, I say to you, unless one is born again, he cannot see the kingdom of God” (John 3:3), “I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me” (John 14:6) , and “this is eternal life, that they may know You, the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom You have sent” (John 17:3).

2. Never put anyone on a pedestal…they will eventually come crashing down.

3. The most overrated sports dynasties are Notre Dame football and the New York Yankees.

4. Nothing is more important than family…never take sides against the family…never let anyone outside the family know what you are thinking.

5. “Look thou character
Give thy thoughts no tongue, nor any unproportioned thought his act
Be familiar, but by no means vulgar
Those friends thou have, and their adoption tried, grapple them to thy soul with hoops of steel
But do not dull thy palm with entertainment of each new-hatched, unfledged comrade
Beware of entrance to a quarrel but, being in, bear it that the opposed may beware of thee
Give every man thy ear, but few thy voice
Take each man’s censure, but reserve thy judgement
Costly thy habit as thy purse can buy, but not expressed in fancy – rich, not gaudy
For the apparel oft proclaims the man
Neither a borrower nor a lender be
For loan oft loses both itself and friend, and borrowing dulls the edge of husbandry
This above all: to thine own self be true
And it must follow, as the night the day, thou cannot then be false to any man”
– Shakespeare’s Hamlet

6. If you work on weekends then you are not at the top of your chosen profession. (notable exceptions: the clergy and sports)

7. Disappointment is the worst emotion, as it is a blend of both anger and sadness.

8. Faith and religion are two different things. Religion is a public show too often put on by hypocrites, while faith is a deeply personal thing that can change your life. Share your faith, not your religion.

9. Rap is not music. Poetry maybe. But not music.

10. Perception is reality & reality is perception.

11. When in doubt, atleast act like you know what you are doing.

12. Anyone who doesn’t shed a tear during the last 10 minutes of Field of Dreams doesn’t have a heart.

13. Don’t be sad because it’s over, be happy it happened in the first place.

14. Abortion is wrong and capital punishment is right. This makes perfect sense.

15. “It’s not what you know but who you know” is just as true as it ever was.

16. Guns don’t kill people…evil, crazy, stupid people kill people (sometimes with a gun).

17. Music makes our world a better place.

18. Freedom of religion has been hijacked to mean freedom from religion, which was not the intent of our Founding Fathers.

19. Go placidly amid the noise and haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence
As far as possible without surrender be on good terms with all persons
Speak your truth quietly and clearly, and listen to others – even the dull and the ignorant, they too have their story
Avoid loud and aggressive persons, they are vexations to the spirit
If you compare yourself with others you may become vain and bitter, for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself
Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans
Keep interested in your own career, however humble, it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time
Exercise caution in your business affairs for the world is full of trickery
But let this not blind you to what virtue there is
Many persons strive for high ideals and everywhere life is full of heroism
Be yourself
Especially, do not feign affection, neither be cynical about love
For in the face of all aridity and disenchantment it is as perennial as the grass
Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth
Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune
But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings
Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness
Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself
Be at peace with God
And whatever your labors and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life keep peace with your soul
With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world
Be cheerful
Strive to be happy
-The Desiderata

20. Milk is the universal beverage, going well with almost all meals and nearly any type of food.

21. Timing is everything and hindsight is 20/20. Looking back, we can all see situations, great & small, where a seemingly insignificant shift of time (a few minutes, a day or two, a month) made a notable difference.

22. It’s always about the money. Always.

23. The wussification of America, in which overly sensitive followers of political correctness have turned our nation into the United States of The Offended, is very real and very disturbing.

24. There is a difference between being alone and being lonely.

25. There are three sides to every story – the two conflicting views of the parties involved, and somewhere in the middle is the truth.

26. Creationism and evolution don’t have to be mutually exclusive.

27. To laugh often and much
To win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children
To earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends
To appreciate beauty
To find the best in others
To leave the world a bit better whether by a healthy child, a redeemed social condition, or a job well done
To know that even one other life has breathed because you lived
This is to have succeeded
— Ralph Waldo Emerson

28. There are three answers to a prayer: yes, no, & not right now.

29. Anyone who says they’ve never contemplated suicide, even if only very briefly, is either very fortunate or a liar.

30. If you can keep your head when all about you are losing theirs and blaming it on you
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you, but make allowance for their doubting too
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting
Or being lied about, don’t deal in lies
Or being hated, don’t give way to hating
And yet don’t look too good, nor talk too wise
If you can dream but not make dreams your master
If you can think but not make thoughts your aim
If you can meet with triumph and disaster and treat those two impostors just the same
If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools
Or watch the things you gave your life to broken, and stoop and build them up with worn-out tools
If you can make one heap of all your winnings and risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss
And lose, and start again at your beginnings and never breathe a word about your loss
If you can force your heart and nerve and muscle to serve your turn long after they are gone
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the will which says to them: ‘Hold on!’
If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue or walk with kings and not lose the common touch
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you
If people count on you, but none too much
If you can fill the unforgiving minute with sixty seconds’ worth of distance run
Yours is the earth and everything that’s in it
And, which is more, you’ll be a man, my son
-Rudyard Kipling

31. Cigarettes & multiple tattoos/piercings decrease a woman’s attractiveness by atleast 50%.

32. There really is no place like home.

33. Don’t ever pray for patience, lest God give you plenty of opportunities to learn your lesson.

34. Life is a lot like the Tom Hanks movie Cast Away. It’s really just you, alone on an island, struggling against the elements. There may be many people in your life, but almost all are like the soccer ball Wilson…they keep you company and give you someone to talk to, but in the end they’re fake, full of hot air, and float away. In matters of survival (food, shelter, etc.) you can only really count on yourself.

35. If you think you are beaten, you are
If you think you dare not, you don’t
If you like to win, but you think you can’t, it is almost certain you won’t
If you think you’ll lose, you’re lost
For out of the world we find success begins with a fellow’s will
It’s all in the state of mind
If you think you are outclassed, you are
You’ve got to think high to rise
You’ve got to be sure of yourself before you can ever win a prize
Life’s battles don’t always go to the stronger or faster man
But sooner or later, the man who wins is the man who thinks he can
— Unknown